by Amanda Abram
“I think I’m going to have Jake talk to him to find out what his issue is. Or maybe I’ll just talk to Chad myself.”
“No, Laur,” I said, shaking my head. “You don’t need to talk to anybody. Chad is cool and all, but I’m okay with the fact he’s not interested in me.”
I was already aware that Chad was going to tell Jake he wasn’t interested in me. Later that night at the party, he offered to take full blame for things not working out between us so I wouldn’t get the third degree from Lauren. He was so nice to make that offer that I couldn’t let him get the third degree from her either. That wouldn’t be fair.
Lauren pouted as she shut her locker. “But I’m not sure I’m okay with it. I had all these fantasies of us going out on double dates every weekend.”
“There will be plenty of opportunities for the two of us to go on double dates in the future,” I assured her. “They just won’t be with Chad.”
Lauren’s expression softened as she linked her arm through mine. “Okay, fine. If you’re not bothered by this whole Chad thing, I guess I won’t be either.”
“Good girl,” I said, patting her arm. “Walk me to my locker?”
“Sure,” she said with a grin.
We started to move, but our steps were halted seconds later when someone—a beautiful, strawberry-blonde someone—suddenly stepped in front of us, blocking our way.
Hannah.
“Hey,” she said, looking directly at me. Her voice was cautious, her expression was somber. “Can we talk?”
I literally had not spoken one word to Hannah since I’d caught her and Elijah kissing at that party. Not once had she attempted to apologize or explain anything—which, admittedly, had been fine with me. It wasn’t like she would have said anything that would make the situation better or make me any less angry with her.
Why did she want to talk to me now? I looked at Lauren to see if the answer to that question was on her face, but she looked just as confused as I felt.
She let go of my arm and turned to me. “I’m gonna go to homeroom. Work on some homework I forgot to finish last night.”
It was a lie—Lauren never forgot to do homework—but I knew she wanted to leave me and Hannah alone. I guess she thought it was a good idea for us to talk.
“Okay,” I said. “I’ll see you later.”
Lauren nodded, smiled at Hannah, and then took off down the hall.
Once she was gone, I sighed and turned to Hannah. “What do you want to talk about?”
Shifting her weight from one foot to the other, she glanced down at the floor and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “I want to apologize for what happened between me and Elijah.”
I crossed my arms tightly over my chest. “It’s a little late for apologies, don’t you think?”
She raised her gaze to meet mine and I almost felt bad for her. She genuinely looked sorry. “I wanted to talk to you sooner, I just didn’t know how to approach you. Lauren told me how upset you were, and I figured I was the last person you wanted to talk to anyway.”
I nodded. “Close. You were the second-to-last person I wanted to talk to. Right behind Elijah.”
Hannah pursed her lips and averted her gaze to Lauren’s locker. “I know this is late, but I’m sorry, Cassie. What I did was horrible. You were my friend and I betrayed you. I don’t expect you to ever forgive me.”
A couple of weeks ago, I would not have even considered forgiving her. Or Elijah. But I’d already mostly forgiven Elijah, so it was only fair that I forgave Hannah too. That didn’t mean I wanted to be friends with her again, but I was over the whole thing. I had moved on.
“I forgive you,” I said with a defeated sigh.
With wide, relieved eyes, she smiled brightly. “You do?”
“I do.” I forced a smile of my own and nodded. “So, was there anything else you wanted to talk to me about?”
She blinked and cleared her throat. “Oh, yeah, um…” Her voice trailed off as she glanced around the hall. “I heard about your talk with Elijah yesterday.”
I arched an eyebrow at her. She had heard about our talk? Who had told her about it? And why?
“What about it?” I asked cautiously.
She played with the hem of her shirt. “Elijah’s upset.”
“Upset? About what?” He’d seemed fine enough when he drove out of my driveway yesterday. Sure, he was bummed by what I had said to him, but he had taken it well. Better than I had expected him to.
Except he hadn’t. He had just put on a good show for me.
Hannah studied me for a moment. “Cassie, I don’t think you should give up on him.”
“What?” I asked, confused.
“Elijah loves you,” she continued. “I know what he did was wrong, but what happened that night at the party meant nothing to either one of us. I swear. He is devastated that things are over between the two of you. I know you’re still hurting from everything, but Cassie, Elijah is a good guy. And if there is any part of you that still has feelings for him, I think you should give your relationship another shot. Don’t give up on him yet.”
Was she serious? Why was she giving me relationship advice regarding Elijah? She was his ex-girlfriend and the reason we broke up in the first place. And why was she so adamantly encouraging me to give my relationship with Elijah another shot when she clearly was not over him? She must not have realized how broken she looked as she spoke. I could tell she didn’t want me giving him another chance, but she was trying to convince me to anyway. Why?
Of course, I knew the answer: because despite the fact Hannah obviously still had feelings for him, she wanted him to be happy—just like he claimed he wanted me to be happy. Elijah had let me go yesterday even though he didn’t want to, and now Hannah was doing the same with Elijah. The two people I was supposed to hate for hurting me were both acting selflessly and honorably, and now I was feeling bad about it. Everybody was unhappy now because of me.
“Hannah,” I said, lowering my voice so nobody would overhear, “you’re still in love with him, aren’t you?”
She gasped. “What? No. Cassie, no, I’m not still in love with him. I swear.”
“It’s okay,” I quickly assured her. “Honestly. I’m over everything. I’m over Elijah. It doesn’t bother me that you still love him.”
Tears sprang to her eyes as she furiously tried blinking them away. “He’s just my friend now. That’s it.”
“But you want to be more again, don’t you?”
She looked like she wanted to deny it, but at the same time, she looked almost relieved at the fact somebody had caught on to her secret. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She quickly wiped at a tear before it had the chance to spill over and make her mascara run. “Like I said, he’s my friend.”
“How did you even know I had talked to him yesterday?”
“Oh, um, he called me yesterday afternoon and told me.”
“Really?” I paused for a moment. “What time did he call you?”
“I don’t know. Around four o’clock maybe. Why?”
Around four o’clock. That wasn’t long after he’d dropped me off at home. Which meant Hannah was pretty much the first person he went to for consolation after our conversation.
“No reason,” I mumbled just as my phone vibrated in my back pocket. Thankful for the interruption, I pulled it out to see who was texting me.
It was Dylan.
Meet me in the art room ASAP, his text read.
My curiosity was piqued. “I should get to homeroom,” I said to Hannah as I typed out a response to Dylan, telling him I’d meet him there in a minute.
“Okay,” she said. “But you’re going to think about what I said, right? About not giving up on your relationship with Elijah?”
I didn’t know whether to lie or tell the truth, so I settled on neither. “I’ll see you later, Hannah,” I said, turning and walking away before she could say anything else.
A feeling of res
olve washed over me as I made my way to the art room to meet Dylan. Now that Hannah had apologized for what happened between her and Elijah, I felt like I could finally close the chapter on that night I caught them kissing. And soon, after Dylan and I came clean to Elijah about what was going on between us and he accepted it, perhaps I could end the entire book of me and Elijah altogether.
When I arrived at the door to the art room a few seconds later, I quickly glanced around the hallway to make sure nobody was looking before letting myself into the darkened classroom. As soon as I shut the door behind me, I turned to see Dylan sitting on top of one of the tables, staring down at his phone. When he heard me enter, he looked up and smiled, sending tiny little butterflies flitting through my stomach.
“Hey, you,” he said softly, and those butterflies multiplied.
“Hey,” I said casually. I had to keep it casual, or else I would be tempted to close the distance between us, throw myself against him and kiss him until we were both breathless and wanting for more.
Clearing my throat, I shook the image out of my head and added, “What’s up?”
He slid off the table and made his way over to me. “I just wanted to say hi, but I’m too paranoid to talk to you where Elijah might see us.” He paused and smirked. “I was going to ask you to meet me under the bleachers, but it’s freezing out.”
I chuckled and set my stuff down on a table next to me. “Okay, well, hi.”
“Hi,” he said in a low voice, reaching out and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
I blinked up at him and, for a moment, almost got lost in his gaze. However, I managed to quickly snap out of it and take a small step back. I didn’t want to move away from him, I just felt it would be safer to, considering we were in an unlocked classroom that anyone could have walked into at any time.
“So, was there anything else?”
“Oh. Yeah, actually.” Dylan narrowed his eyes at me. “I saw you talking to Hannah a minute ago. What was that all about?”
“She wanted to apologize for what happened.”
“Better late than never,” he mumbled.
“I know, right?” I glanced down at the floor. “Oh, and she also asked me to reconsider my decision to end things for good with him.”
Dylan cocked an eyebrow. “Come again?”
“She thinks I should give my relationship with Elijah another chance.” I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms over my chest. “She was the first person he wanted to talk to yesterday after our conversation. Can you believe that?”
A look of guilt washed over Dylan’s face as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Um, actually, she was the second person he wanted to talk to. He called me less than a minute after you texted me, but I was too scared to answer, so I just let the call go to voicemail.”
“Okay,” I said slowly, “but it still doesn’t explain why Elijah felt the need to talk to his ex-girlfriend about us in the first place.”
“Elijah and Hannah go way back. They were friends long before they got together, and they never stopped being friends after they broke up. I guess she is just someone he feels he can confide in. He wanted to talk to someone yesterday, and he knows our other friends are useless when it comes to stuff like that, so when he couldn’t reach me, he turned to her.”
It made sense, but I still didn’t like it. Elijah and Hannah had a history together, and I was never able to fully compete with that. I was always just the consolation prize. Second best. It was why it was so easy for him to cheat on me with her.
Which was why I was confused as to why Elijah was so hell-bent on winning me back. He couldn’t have possibly loved me more than the girl he’d been friends with his entire life. The girl he was with for more than two years. The girl he’d lost his virginity to. The girl who, despite everything she had put him through, was still one of his best friends and closest confidants.
“So,” Dylan said, his brow slightly furrowed, “how did you respond when she asked you to reconsider?”
“I didn’t know how to respond, so I just kind of walked off after you texted me to meet you.” I paused for a moment. “She clearly doesn’t want me to reconsider, though. She’s still in love with him.”
“You think so?”
“Most definitely. I accused her of still having feelings for him and she denied it, but I can tell she still wants him.” I tapped the side of my head with my finger. “Women’s intuition.”
Dylan snorted at that. “You do not have women’s intuition.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked defensively, cocking my hip to the side. “How would you know?”
He threw his head back and laughed. “If you truly had women’s intuition, I wouldn’t have had to almost literally spell out the fact I had feelings for you.”
“That’s different,” I scoffed as a blush crept up my face. “Women’s intuition doesn’t work that way.”
“Okay, okay,” he said, raising his hands in defeat. “It’s not important. What is important is that Hannah still likes Elijah. And we also know that, despite the fact he wants to get back together with you, Elijah still has a soft spot for Hannah. So, maybe we should think of a way to get them back together.” A sly grin began to tug at his lips. “Because if we get them back together—”
“It would maybe soften the blow when we tell him about us,” I said as soon as I figured out where his trail of thought was going. “That’s actually a pretty good idea.”
“Thank you,” he beamed, taking a bow.
“But how do you suppose we do that?”
He thought about it for a moment before glancing down at his watch. “I don’t know, but we don’t have time to figure it out right now because we need to get to homeroom.”
I grabbed my stuff off the table and flung my backpack over my shoulder. “Well, I’m not working after school today. Do you want to come over to my house to study and do some brainstorming?”
“You mean, like a date?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.
I rolled my eyes. “A study date, maybe.”
He grinned. “Close enough.” He grabbed the shoulder strap of my backpack and slowly pulled me toward him, so we were only inches apart. “You know, I was thinking. Maybe while we’re waiting to complete option two, we could give option one a shot.”
I felt my gaze subconsciously lower to his lips as I entertained the idea for literally one second. It was tempting, for sure, but I didn’t want to be late for homeroom, and I sure as heck didn’t want to run the risk of being caught making out with Dylan by Elijah, a teacher, one of our friends, or anybody.
Prying his hand off my backpack, I playfully pushed him away. “Option one is off-limits at school.”
Dylan’s lips briefly formed a pout before morphing into a devious grin. “Just at school? What about at your house?”
Annoyed, I grabbed his sleeve and pulled him toward the door. “Don’t make me cancel our study date,” I warned, but my smile gave away my empty threat. I pointed at the door. “We can’t leave this room together. You go first.”
Dylan nodded and peeked out the window in the door to make sure nobody was around. “I’ll see you in class later,” he said before quickly opening the door and slipping out of the room.
I waited at least a minute before making my own exit. I figured that would be a safe amount of time to ensure nobody who might have seen Dylan leave would also see me leave as well. But I figured wrong, because as soon as I walked out of the room, I was greeted by Lauren standing right outside the door, hands on hips, staring at me with a look of disappointment on her face.
“Laur,” I said in surprise. “I thought you were going to homeroom.”
“We both know I lied to give you an opportunity to talk to Hannah alone.” Her suspicious gaze flickered past my shoulder. “What were you just doing in the art room? You don’t take art.”
She wasn’t going to believe whatever lie I was about to make up in response, so I just went with the first lame thing that
popped into my head. “I was thinking of signing up for it next year, but I wanted to take a tour of the classroom first.”
As predicted, Lauren wasn’t buying it. “Oh yeah? And what was Dylan’s excuse? Because I saw him walk out of that room less than a minute before you did.”
With a defeated sigh, I reopened the door to the art room, grabbed her arm, and quickly pulled her inside just as the warning bell rang.
“What’s going on, Cassie?” Lauren asked. “Why were you and Dylan hiding out in here alone?”
“Look,” I said, “we only have a minute or so to talk, so I’m just going to give you an abridged version of what’s going on.” I took a deep breath and held it for a moment, debating on whether I should come clean to her. When I finally decided that was the best thing to do, I blurted out, “I kissed Dylan at his party on Saturday and we’ve decided we want to be together.”
She blinked at me with a blank stare before a look of dread slowly washed over her face and she slapped a hand to her forehead. “Are you serious, Cassie? I thought we’d already gone over this—”
“We did, and I get it—you hate the idea of us being together.”
“I don’t hate the idea of you two being together. In fact, under any other circumstance, I would be ‘shipping the two of you so hard right now. I mean, you look hot together, you get along really well, and there’s no doubt in my mind that Dylan would treat you like an absolute queen.”
I waited for her to finish. There was no way that’s all she had to say on the subject. “I have a feeling there’s a ‘but’ in there somewhere.”
Lauren crossed her arms over her chest. “You’re right, and that ‘but’ is Elijah. When he finds out—”
“Dylan and I are aware of how he might react when he finds out,” I said. “That’s why we’re trying to figure out the best way to tell him. And when to tell him.”
Lauren tilted her head to one side and said, “Okay, and do you think there is a way you can tell him without making him explode?”
“Yes.” I nodded hesitantly. “Maybe. I don’t know.”
Lauren frowned. “And when he explodes, are you and Dylan fully prepared to deal with the aftermath of that explosion? Friendships will be tested. And possibly lost.”