Will laughed weakly. He felt as if he’d been wrung out and there was nothing left of him. What would happen if they ever actually made love the correct way? He would be a puddle of nothing.
“Oh, yes,” he said, leaning forward to kiss the tip of her nose. “That was fabulous.”
Chapter 17
Will handed Rose a handkerchief so she could clean herself then he lifted her off the shelf. She slid down his body, reveling in the feel of his hard angles, and kissed him thoroughly. She really did enjoy kissing him. She enjoyed everything they had done tonight. She’d had no idea that something like that could happen inside of her body. It had been like an explosion of a million lights behind her eyes, almost rendering her unconscious.
She wanted to do it again. She wanted to feel that release again and again and again and she wanted to feel it while Will was inside of her.
Her feet hit the floor and her knees buckled. He pulled her to him, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. Oh, how she loved these kisses.
Something flitted past them causing Will to break the kiss and rear back. Rose laughed and watched the multicolored winged insect dart this way and that.
“It’s a butterfly,” she said. “I can’t believe there’s a butterfly in here.”
They both watched as the orange and black butterfly alighted on a rose petal, then just as quickly took off again, its movements erratic and yet beautiful at the same time.
Will made short work of fastening his breeches and adjusting his clothes while Rose leaned against the shelf.
“I don’t want this night to end,” she said.
He grinned at her and kissed her on the forehead. “We must get you back to the palace before people realize you are missing.”
“They’ll just think I’m in the stables.” She wanted to ask if they could stay here for a wee bit longer but didn’t want to appear needy or whining. “Can we come back?”
“Rose…” His gaze flickered away and her heart dropped.
She pushed off from the shelf and forced the strength back into her legs. “We should probably put the flower pots back where they were. We don’t want anyone to know we were here.”
Her throat was closing up and she stopped talking, helping him move the rose pots back to order. It looked as if they had never been here and it made her sad. Even the butterfly was gone.
She brushed the dirt from her hands. “I’m certain we both missed supper by now. Tomorrow night is to be a ball for the dignitaries that are arriving. It’s to be quite the thing and everyone is excited. It’s a change from the queen’s normal salon and certainly something different to brighten up this dreary winter.”
“Rose.” Will put his hands on her shoulders to still her fidgeting, and looked deep into her eyes. “Do you regret what we just did?”
“No,” she said softly. “But I fear that you regret it.”
“I will never regret this, and I will always remember it. My Rose among the roses, opening up for me. It will be a memory I pull out and savor for years to come when I am alone in another foreign country.”
She lowered her gaze, her heart heavy with sadness and the realization that at some point they would part ways and he would be nothing but a memory. She wondered if any other man would compare to Will Sheffield. She’d not had any sexual experiences other than tonight and the other kisses they had shared, but she thought that maybe Will was an exception and nothing else was going to compare to him. Certainly Lysle’s weak kiss had not held a candle to kissing Will.
She swallowed her sadness and tried to be realistic. Will was not a man to settle down. He was an adventurer, a nomad, a loner. And her family would never approve of an Englishman for their only daughter.
“This has certainly been a night to remember,” she said. “I will cherish the memories.”
He did not remove his hands from her shoulders, rendering her immobile when she desperately wanted to flee. “This can’t happen again,” he said, those dark eyes trying to see into her. “It wouldn’t be right for your future husband.”
She laughed weakly. “I fear you’ve already ruined me for my future husband.”
His hands dropped from her shoulders, and he rubbed his eyes. “My deepest apologies, Rose. I did not mean for that to happen. You are still a virgin, untouched.”
“Oh, I’ve been touched,” she said. “I’ve been thoroughly touched and I doubt any man can compare to you, Will.”
His smile was tinged with sadness. “I sincerely question that.”
She shook her head but did not say more because there was nothing more to say. What had happened was not going to happen again and that saddened her.
“We should go,” she said, taking one more look around, not to make sure that everything was put to right but to etch this memory upon her mind.
Will led her out of the hothouse and into the cold air. It seemed much colder than earlier but that was because they’d become accustomed to the humid hothouse. Will did not take her hand this time nor did he put her hand on his arm. They walked side by side, silent, not touching, close but worlds apart.
They reached one of the side doors that was close to the festivities going on inside.
“You go first,” Will said. “I’ll enter a bit later so it doesn’t look suspicious.”
Rose looked at him long and hard. “Will I see you again?”
“Of course.” He seemed surprised by the question.
“You’re not leaving with your information to sell it to the highest bidder?”
A crease formed between his brows, and she didn’t know if he was confused by her question or angry about it. “No. There is still much to do here and you are not yet safe.”
“So you’re staying for me?” Her heart lifted a little at that. Did he care that much to stay and make sure she was safe? Or was he staying to gather more information?
With an angry look and an angrier sound to go with it Will grabbed her around the waist and yanked her to him to kiss her. Their lips mashed together, tooth scraped against tooth and his tongue invaded her mouth, taking and taking. Instantly her blood ran hot and the wetness between her legs returned. Her belly was heavy and she pushed her pelvis against him to feel his erection. She was amazed that he could do this to her in a few short moments, turn her into a seething, writhing woman who desperately craved whatever he could give her.
Then he pulled away just as suddenly and she stumbled back. Her lips were raw and she missed the feeling of his tongue inside of her.
“I don’t know what to do with you, Rose Turner.”
She hid her smile, secretly glad that she confused him as much as he confused her. “Keep kissing me,” she said, not knowing where this saucy woman had come from.
He growled and pulled open the palace door. “Go,” he said.
She slipped through and into the relative warmth of the palace, her lips stinging, wetness making her thighs slick and the feel of his fingers digging into her waist still with her.
Of course, the first person she encountered was Lysle. It was as if he knew that she would come through the upper corridor at that time. She’d made her way up several flights of stairs having encountered no one. It had given her the time she needed to collect her thoughts and calm her racing heart but she was still not prepared to see Lysle.
“There you are,” he said with a wide smile. His gaze scanned her face, settling on her lips. She checked the urge to cover her mouth, knowing that her lips were probably still swollen from Will’s kisses. And her hair! Good God what did her hair look like? Probably a mess. Margaret would definitely be rolling her eyes now.
“You missed supper,” he said in an accusatory tone. “I was worried about you.”
“I went to the stables,” she said. “I must have lost track of time because the next thing I knew my stomach was grumbling. I’m sorry I disappointed you but I was not aware that we were to meet for supper?” She made the last a question to put the blame on herself when she knew without a doubt that they
had not set any plans.
His face softened. “We didn’t. I just look forward to seeing you when I can. You should really stop going out in the cold, Rose. Your lips and cheeks are becoming chapped from the weather.”
The last was said in a rebuke, as if she might not care about her appearance but he did.
Unconsciously her palms covered her cheeks, but they weren’t cold. On the contrary they were quite warm.
“The queen has moved her salon since there are so many guests arriving daily for the upcoming ceremony.” He held out his arm to her but Rose hesitated.
“I can’t possibly go looking like this. My hem is covered in dirt from the stables and as you said, my skin is chapped. Let me change gowns and get warm and I will meet you there.”
They were in a hall that connected to the hall where the new salon was to be tonight. There were some people about but not so many that Rose missed when Will slipped through, coming from the same staircase that she had. He deliberately kept his head turned away from hers but she still looked at him.
Lysle followed her glance and frowned. “Just don’t be too long, dear. We have so little time that we can spend together I hate to waste it.”
She hummed her answer, not an agreement and not a disagreement, and took her leave, hurrying toward her chamber and coincidentally the same direction Will had taken.
She rounded a corner, lifting her skirts higher than society would allow and hurrying at a most inappropriate pace. Her mind whirled with so many disjointed thoughts that she was almost dizzy with it.
That was why she didn’t see the person standing in the shadows. She let out a small screech when an arm snaked around her waist and dragged her backward. She shoved her elbow into a hard stomach and heard a satisfying grunt of pain. She was about to scream when a familiar voice whispered in her ear, “It’s me.”
She slumped against Will but quickly turned in his arms. He had dragged her to a dark alcove, behind the bust of some Scottish noble from long ago. If someone had a mind to study long deceased Scottish nobles’ busts they would easily be seen but not many were about and no one was interested in the statue.
“What are you doing?” she hissed, but there was no heat to her words. All she could feel was Will’s strong chest and his warm arms around her and she felt like it had been ages since he’d held her when it had been less than an hour. In such a short amount of time Will Sheffield seemed more like home to her than this drafty place did.
He kissed her, pressing her back against the far corner, until she was breathless and her legs once again lost all strength.
“What was that for?” she asked.
“I missed you.”
“We just left each other.”
He kissed her again, just a quick peck on the lips. She wanted to pull him forward and kiss him harder, but it was too risky.
“Now I am sufficiently ready to let you go. Where were you headed?”
“To change gowns for the soiree. Lord Lysle is waiting for me.” Her lips twisted in a grimace. She had no desire to pretend to be interested in Lord Lysle but she didn’t know what else to do for the time being. She needed to think this through more thoroughly and wished she could lock herself in her chambers, change into clothes more comfortable than the tightly fitting gown waiting for her, curl up in a chair before the fire and let her mind wander.
“Be careful with him,” Will was saying.
“I am.”
He looked at her strangely, as if he wanted to see into her soul. She lowered her gaze, almost afraid that he could see that deeply and she didn’t want him to glimpse what was inside of her. She had feelings for Will Sheffield. Strong feelings. She half wondered if she was in love with him. Will would not appreciate those emotions. He had already told her once tonight that they would eventually go their separate ways.
She didn’t like that thought even as she understood the need for it. They were too different and they both wanted other things from life. Despite the fact that she never wanted to come to Holyrood she did have aspirations of marriage, and she knew that she didn’t want to live the life of a border clan like her mother and father and brothers. But Will could not provide her with the stable home and life that she truly wanted.
Will was a wanderer and he made it clear that his future would be the same.
But still, that did not stop her burgeoning feelings.
He tilted her head up, and she had no choice but to look into his dark eyes.
“Be careful with him,” he said again.
“I will,” she repeated.
“I worry about you.”
“I can take care of myself.”
He grinned. “I don’t doubt that you believe that but these men are ruthless.”
She shivered at his words, feeling inadequate and ill-equipped to play the games these men were playing.
“I faced Lord Darnley.” The moment the words were out of her mouth she wished that she could snatch them back. She’d had no intention of telling Will, or anyone else, about her last encounter with Darnley. There was no need to worry anyone and there was nothing they could do about it anyway.
Will stilled. “What?” he said softly, with a touch of menace.
Her gaze slid away from his. “It was nothing.”
“You were supposed to stay away from the parts of the castle that he haunts.”
“Well apparently he failed to remember that he was not allowed in the corridor where my chamber is located.”
Will’s chest rose in a long, drawn-out inhale. His eyes had gone flat and emotionless but Rose felt the fine tremor that traveled through him.
“Truly, Will, all is well. Nothing happened.”
“I don’t believe you.”
She touched his cheek. “You really do care, don’t you?”
“Of course I care. What happened? Tell me everything.”
So she told him everything because she knew he would never let her go if she didn’t and part of her wanted to tell him anyway. She liked confiding in Will. She trusted him even though he was a mercenary.
By the time she was finished, his eyes were sparkling with laughter. “By God I think you’ve found your defense. He would never want Mary to know and by threatening him you have tied his hands.”
“But I’ve also angered him even more.”
“But you won that round and I’m damn proud of you.”
He kissed her and she felt lighthearted and young, as if for that one moment she had no worries greater than being caught kissing Will Sheffield in a dark alcove.
Eventually Will pulled away. “Still, I would advise that you stay away from him.”
“I have no desire to go near him. I’m well aware that I won that battle but the war is still raging.”
He shook his head and grinned. “My Rose.” Then he shook his head again.
“Go,” he said. “Before I forget where we are and I kiss you again.”
She looked up at him and he groaned.
“Stop looking at me that way, my Rose. Or more than kissing will happen behind this bust.”
She grinned and slid away from him, checking the corridor before hurrying toward her room, feeling cold without Will’s presence.
She was a bit frightened of Lysle now that she understood his motives but she also knew that Will would protect her if he had to. The thought made her warm inside and she was smiling when she entered her chamber.
Margaret was standing in the middle of the room, her back toward the door but her torso twisted so she was looking behind her. Alice was on her hands and knees on the floor.
Margaret looked at Rose crossly. “You missed supper.”
“What are you doing here?” Rose asked, disappointed that she didn’t have some moments alone to prepare for the night ahead with Lysle.
Margaret grimaced. “Ruth stepped on my hem and ripped it. Alice is repairing it.”
Margaret looked stunning in a deep red dress that was almost leaning toward brown. It complemented
her dark hair and made her complexion glow.
Alice struggled to her feet. “I think that’ll do it, my lady.”
“Thank you, Alice. I will stay until Rose is dressed and we can go down together.”
With a sigh Rose allowed Alice to undress her and listened to her tut-tuts of disapproval that her hem was “surely ruined this time.” Rose quickly washed in the basin that had been placed in front of the fire to keep the water warm. Still she shivered and once again wished for privacy so she could wash her private areas. The thought made her think of Will and the hothouse and the things his hands had made her feel and then she thought of the things she had done to him. Her face heated and she knew she was blushing. She turned away from Margaret who had sat down and was inspecting her mended hem, and Alice who was pulling out a gold gown that Rose had put off wearing because the cost had been so dear for this one.
Alice gave Rose a wistful look and Rose sighed in acquiescence. “Very well,” she said grudgingly. Every time Alice pulled the gold gown out Rose told her to put it back. She didn’t know why she was averse to wearing it even though it was by far the most gorgeous gown she owned. It just seemed too exquisite for someone like her. She felt like an imposter wearing something that would be better suited to Emma or even Queen Mary herself.
But Rose was feeling reckless tonight. She’d done things she’d never done before and why not end the evening by wearing the gown she’d never worn before.
Alice helped her into the endless petticoats and stays and chemises until finally the shimmering gown was lowered over her head to settle around her like a glittering cloud. Alice hummed in admiration and grinned as she fussed with the pleats of the skirting. She attached the sleeves that were a warm brown with gold flowers stitched into them.
Alice dressed her hair, pulling it back then loosening it a bit so it was not so severe. Tendrils were pulled forward, softening her appearance.
Rose faced the full-length mirror and couldn’t believe that the person staring back was her. She’d never looked so…feminine before.
“Oh, my,” Margaret said from behind her. “You’re beautiful. The color perfectly complements your hair and complexion.”
Bound to a Spy Page 13