Jake started the truck, turned on his headlights, hoped to goodness the interior lights would turn off quickly and waited for the approaching vehicle to top the butte. The road was only wide enough for one car at a time and he wasn’t staying up here any longer than necessary. He didn’t know whether to curse or bless the car coming up the hill that put a sudden halt to their interlude. If temptation took on human form, tonight it was without a doubt Anna.
A car slowly came up to the top and pulled alongside his truck, a sheriff’s deputy. Jake decided the evening was about to get much, much worse. The officer got out of his car. Jake rolled down his window and said “Happy Fourth of July, officer.”
The officer, shining a flashlight in the cab, asked what they were doing up on the butte and Jake explained they’d come to watch the fireworks and were just ready to leave. The officer asked a few more questions – did they have any open containers, had they been drinking, doing anything of a suspicious manner. Jake about choked on the last question. Depending who you asked, there was something mighty suspicious that had passed between him and the girl sitting on the other side of the pickup with the flaming red face. Then the deputy asked if they’d seen a group of kids in a small yellow car. When Jake said they hadn’t, the officer bid them goodnight and returned to his car.
Jake put the truck in gear, heading down the hill. By the time they reached town, Anna had calmed down enough Jake wasn’t afraid she would hyperventilate. He drove her home in silence. He wasn’t sure what he could have said at that point anyway. Anna sat curled against the door on her side of the truck, staring out the window. Jake didn’t think she’d answer him now even if he did feel brave enough to speak.
When Jake pulled into the driveway, he saw her folks left on the light by the kitchen door. Other than that, the house was dark.
Turning off his lights and the ignition, Jake sat quietly for a moment, hoping Anna would give him some sign that she wasn’t going to refuse to ever see him again. Now that his passion had plenty of time to cool, he realized he’d pushed Anna too far, taking things too fast. He was ashamed he had nearly lost control, afraid his carelessness may cost him Anna’s friendship.
Getting out of the pickup, he walked around to her door and opened it. She still just sat there with her head down, quiet, looking remorseful.
“Anna, I’m sorry” he whispered, but got no response. He realized she couldn’t hear him. Frustrated and fearful, he gently touched her chin and she turned to look at him, tears pooling in her eyes. Not tears. He could handle shouting, threats, even the smack in the face that he no doubt deserved, but not tears.
No mumbled apologies or looking at his feet with this girl. Taking her hand, he had to look her square in the face so she could hear. “Anna, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for things to go so far. I just wanted to hold you and watch the fireworks. Honest, I didn’t plan on anything else. I’m so sorry.”
In the time it took for Anna to speak, Jake thought he would die. She sat staring at him with those huge violet eyes, tears trailing down her cheeks, not making a sound. It was the saddest thing he’d ever seen and nearly broke his heart. For the first time in his adult life, he felt like crying right along with her.
He had taken her trust and cast it aside when his own selfish desires came sweeping over him. He was the one who had given his passion free rein, had done what he could to stir her desire, even knowing Anna was inexperienced. That was part of why he loved her so much. Yes, dang it all, he’d finally admit he was in love with her, at least to himself. Anna trusted him and he’d let her down. Now he’d have to pay the piper. That was for certain.
“Jake, I...” she had to take a deep breath before she could go on. “Jake, you weren’t the only one who got carried away. Thank you for stopping things when you did. I appreciate it.”
She was thanking him? He felt like a complete heel and she was thanking him? He felt a lump clog his throat but managed to swallow it down.
“Anna, I betrayed your trust. I behaved reprehensibly. I’m deeply and truly sorry. It won’t happen again.”
Anna just nodded her head and accepted his hand as he helped her out of the truck. She grabbed her purse and Jake carried her duffle bag, walking in silence to the door. Jake opened the screen door and kissed her cheek, handing her the duffle. “Other than the way the day ended, I can’t think when I’ve had a better 4th of July, Anna. Thank you for spending it with me.”
Placing her hand on his cheek, Anna offered a small smile. “Thank you for today, Jake. I won’t ever forget it.” With that she turned and quietly went inside.
Anna managed to make it to her bedroom before she fell apart. Collapsing on her bed, she grabbed a pillow and curled around it. Her daddy always warned her if you play with fire you get your fingers burnt. She was feeling thoroughly singed. What if the car hadn’t come up the hill? Would she and Jake have done something they’d both deeply regret tomorrow? Although she’d like to say no, she wasn’t convinced the answer wouldn’t have been yes. What if Jake hadn’t noticed the headlights when he did? They would have been caught in the back of the pickup by the deputy in a very compromising situation. Anna would have died of embarrassment right then and there. Despite all that, she’d enjoyed every single thing Jake had done and wanted him to do more. What kind of person was she? What would Jake think of her now? She behaved like a… like a wanton strumpet. And yes, maybe she had read one too many romance novels, but goodness gracious, what had she been thinking? How could she have gotten so swept up in the moment and carried away? She was more sensible than that. She’d certainly never done that before. But then again, she’d never been in love before.
Anna sat up and wiped her cheeks. Love? Yes, she was completely, totally, deeply and irrevocably in love with Jake Chandler. Teasing Jake. Jake, the good-time guy. Jake, who didn’t know how to be serious to save his life. Jake, whose typical choice of female companionship involved a petite buxom blonde with a name he would not remember five minutes after their date ended.
Did he care about her too, or was she just another passing fancy to him? She knew Jake could have his choice of any girl he wanted, but was he ready to be in a relationship that lasted more than a few weeks? Jake was the only one who could answer that.
Calming down, Anna realized that even if he hadn’t said anything, he’d showed her how he felt numerous times.
Tonight was a perfect example. Even though they let their passion run further away from their good sense than either of them intended, she couldn’t believe how quickly he jumped into action, making sure she was sheltered from prying eyes and tried his best to keep her reputation intact. Anna knew he could have left her to scramble herself back together, but his first thought was to tenderly protect and shield her.
One thing Anna knew for certain, there would be no more time spent in the back of a pickup under the stars with Jake. The combination was too potent for her to handle.
CHAPTER NINE
Anna was sitting on the end of a pew next to Sam at church the next morning when someone came up beside her and nudged her leg to scoot over. Assuming it was one of their neighbors, she slid closer to Sam, making room without looking up. Sam’s elbow dug into her ribs, causing her head to snap up. Narrowing her eyes at her brother, he nodded toward her other side with a big smile.
Turning her head, Anna was shocked to find Jake sitting beside her, looking sorry and contrite.
Well, isn’t this appropriate? Anna thought to herself. After what we almost did last night, I can’t think of anywhere either of us needs to be more than here this morning.
Anna gave Jake a half-smile and turned her attention to Pastor Douglas who asked for the opening hymn to begin. She thought Pastor’s sermon topic for the morning was about the burden of guilt, but it was hard to pay attention with Jake sitting beside her. She had to give him credit, though. He never tried to touch her, kept his hands to himself and even made sure his pant leg stayed away from her skirt.
Aft
er the service, Anna introduced Jake to Pastor Douglas as “a friend.” Her parents waited for them outside, anxious to welcome Jake.
Ken and Sam both shook his hand and Sue gave him a warm hug. “Well, Jake, what made you decide to join our little congregation this morning?” The Zimmerman family had attended the little community church ever since Anna could remember. The church had been built sometime around World War I and the neighbors in the area who didn’t belong to denominations in town kept up the little church. Pastor Douglas, who worked full-time as a custodian at the junior high, offered his services to the congregation every Sunday. Anna usually enjoyed his sermons and most often took away food for thought. Today was an exception.
Walking toward their car, Sue looked back over her shoulder at Anna and Jake, who were still standing staring at each other, not talking. “You’re coming for lunch, aren’t you Jake. We won’t take no for an answer.”
“Thanks, Sue,” Jake looked up and smiled. “I’d love to.”
“You’ll give Sugar a ride home, won’t you Jake?” Ken called as he shut Sue’s car door and started around to the driver’s side.
“Yes, sir, I’ll see her home.”
Jake turned and looked at Anna, raising an eyebrow and giving her a shy smile. Praying for strength, she followed him to his pickup and accepted his hand to climb in. They drove in silence and were almost to the farm lane when Jake finally spoke.
“Anna, I understand if you are angry with me and never want to see me again, but please know I am very sorry about how far things went last night. I hope you can forgive me.” He slowed the truck to nearly a crawl while he spoke, hoping to get an answer from her before they pulled into the driveway.
Determined not to cry, Anna lifted her chin and drew in a deep breath. “I owe you an apology as well, Jake. I let you take things too far and was enjoying it every bit as much as you were. I’m mortified by my loose behavior and hope you’ll accept my apologies as well.”
Jake bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. How could she think her behavior was loose? It wasn’t like she was playing fast with him or leading him on. Anna was as sweet and innocent as they came, and if he had anything to say about it, she’d stay that way. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Anna. Not at all. I would never think you were anything besides a very sweet girl. Honest.”
Anna slid her hand slowly across the seat and touched his. “Thank you,” she said carefully and offered him a watery smile.
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After lunch, Anna volunteered to clean up the kitchen. She kicked off her sandals, tied an apron on over her church dress, and loaded the dishwasher while Jake cleared the table. They washed and dried what didn’t fit in the already full dishwasher.
Grateful for their help, Sue and Ken went to the living room to read the Sunday paper while Sam and Lisa sat in the family room looking through bridal magazines and making wedding plans. They picked the second Saturday in September for a wedding date – the date they had originally planned to wed before Sam’s accident.
Anna was so happy to see Sam and Lisa moving forward with life, especially now that Sam would be able to walk again. By next summer, he would have management of the farm well in hand and Anna could return to whatever it was she wanted to do.
Releasing a sigh as she scrubbed a big pot clean, Jake leaned closer and said, “Penny for your thoughts.”
Anna smiled at him. “I was thinking about what I’ll be doing this time next year. Sam will be back at one hundred percent and they won’t need me on the farm.”
Jake hadn’t considered there was even a remote possibility that Anna would be anywhere except on the farm. He couldn’t picture her returning to Portland or doing anything other than being his little library mouse. The thought of her leaving hit him like a fist to the stomach, enough to double him over and make him ill.
“You mean you’d leave the farm? Go back to the city?” Jake asked, trying to keep the sense of panic out of his voice, hoping Anna would quickly reassure him she’d never leave.
“I don’t know. It would just depend,” she said, cryptically.
“On?” Jake questioned. What was she trying to do to him? Would she really leave the farm? Leave him?
“Things,” Anna said, not wanting to have this conversation with Jake, especially not right now. Her feelings for him were too fresh and confusing, especially in light of the fact that she finally admitted to herself she loved him. She wouldn’t stay around if Jake wasn’t serious about her. She couldn’t bear to see him with anyone else and working across the street from him would be an agony beyond considering.
“Like what things?” Jake asked, hoping to get her to say something he could argue against, convince her she needed to stay.
“Just things.” Anna set her jaw. Jake was coming to realize when she did that, he might as well not push her because she wasn’t going to tell him until she was good and ready.
They finished the rest of the dishes in silence. Anna took off the apron and hung it on a hook on the back of the pantry door then took Jake’s hand and tugged him outside. They wandered around the yard, holding hands, not talking about anything significant, commenting on her mother’s garden, the flowers, how the crops were doing.
They both eventually relaxed and fell into their old pattern of talking like good friends. Suddenly, Anna dropped his hand and ran over to a swing hung in a massive tree and gave herself a running start as she jumped onto the seat.
Jake felt his heart soften just watching her. Soft dapples of sunlight filtered through the leaves of the tree and highlighted the air around Anna. The skirt of the lavender dress she wore floated on the breeze. Her head was thrown back, hair trailing loose and thick, bare feet in the air. He could hear her throaty laughter. If he was an artist, it would have made a beautiful painting. Serenity would be a fitting title. As it was, he knew the image would be burned forever into his heart.
“Come give me a push, fancy boy,” Anna called over her shoulder, with a teasing smile that made warmth curl into his chest.
Jake laughed, picturing Anna as a little girl on the swing begging for a push. He bet she was adorable then, too.
“How high do you want to fly, Sugar?” he asked as he walked over and gave her a big push. She soared into the air, her laughter floating down on him like a soothing balm. All his years of running around with the party crowd, he never once would have imagined something as simple as this, pushing a sweet girl on a swing, could bring him such intense joy and pleasure. He was beginning to realize that some of the most beautiful pleasures were also the most simple and pure.
He was just getting ready to give her another big push when he felt cold water splat against his back with a burst. Grabbing the swing and pulling it to a stop, he and Anna turned to see Sam and Lisa holding a bucket full of water balloons.
“You two lovebirds look like you need cooling off,” Sam said, tossing another balloon threateningly up in the air and catching it.
“Really,” Jake said, hooking his thumbs in his front pants pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels. “And you two think you’re the ones for the job?”
“Yep, we do,” Sam answered, squinting at Jake menacingly. He and Jake looked like they were enacting a play of an old west show down. Between the swaggering, gesturing and squinting, Anna and Lisa were having a hard time not laughing themselves silly.
Jake turned to Anna and mouthed something the other two couldn’t hear. Anna dashed around the corner of the house and was quickly back, standing close to Jake.
“Well, then, bring it on,” Jake said, nodding to Anna, who handed him the garden hose with a sprayer nozzle attached.
Jake sprayed Sam at the same time he launched another water missile. It hit Jake on the side of the head. Lisa threw one at Anna that missed by a mile but didn’t burst. Anna grabbed it up and threw it back at Lisa, catching her full on the back.
Without any ammunition, Anna quickly took refuge behind Jake, sticking her tongue out at
her brother then using Jake as a shield. Sam and Lisa aimed and fired, sometimes hitting their targets, sometimes missing. If any of the balloons survived, Anna threw them back with consistent accuracy.
Their shrieks and laughter quickly drew Sue and Ken to see what all the commotion was about. Looking out from the family room window, they decided to stay safely inside and enjoy the show.
When Sam and Lisa ran out of balloons, they threw their hands in the air and called a truce. Jake let go of the nozzle and turned off the spray.
“So you two admit, you’ve been had?” Jake inquired, still pointing the hose in their direction.
“We give, we give, you win,” Sam said, bent over trying to catch his breath. Lisa was trying to shake water out of her hair and wring it from the hem of her skirt.
Anna gave Jake a high five and went to turn off the hose. She returned with a pile of towels. The foursome wandered to the patio, where they sank onto wicker chairs and soaked in the sunshine. Sue brought out a tray of lemonade and cookies and went back inside, pleased to see her kids have such a carefree and pleasant afternoon.
When their clothes had dried and they grew sleepy from the sun, Jake got up and stretched. Sticking his hand out to Sam he smiled. “We’ll have to do this again, but if you give me advance warning, I’ll bring my own weaponry.”
“You bet, Jake,” Sam said, struggling to stand up. “Thanks for hanging out with us today. It was fun.”
“Thanks for having me.” Jake turned to Lisa and nodded at Sam. “You keep this guy out of trouble, okay?”
Lisa smiled. “Absolutely,” she said, squeezing Sam’s arm. “That’s what I’m here for.”
Anna stuck her head in the door to see where her parents were and found them asleep on the couch in the family room. She quietly shut the door and turned to Jake. “I know you wanted to say goodbye to Mom and Dad, but they are both asleep and I hate to bother them.”
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