An unnameable sensation was flooding through Eve. Never before had she wanted to inflict harm on another human being, but the urge to tear and rake at Josiah’s face, to annihilate him from the face of the earth, was so strong she could taste it. Her rage was scorching and she could see Josiah had read what was in her mind and it disconcerted him. He stepped back, glaring at her. ‘It’ll be my word against yours, remember that, and I say she and maybe the pair of you too have been stealing from us. We took you in out of the goodness of our hearts, got you a job at the vicarage, treated you like our own, and this is how you repay us.’
‘You’re unnatural, twisted.’ The words were fired at him. Eve seemed to have grown inches, so rigidly did she hold herself. ‘To make a little bairn do that. What else have you done—’
‘Stop it.’ Phoebe’s voice was thin and piercing. It brought all eyes to her. ‘Stop this.’
‘He’s lying, Phoebe, I swear it.’
Phoebe’s eyes flickered as they met Eve’s.
She knows. Eve stared at Josiah’s wife. The reaction, slight as it had been, betrayed Phoebe’s knowledge of the truth.
But then Phoebe shook her head. ‘You’re wrong. This is a mistake.’
‘I know what I saw and it’s not a mistake. He was—’
‘No.’ Phoebe’s face was drained of colour and she was speaking through stiff lips but her voice held a sharpness which belied her slight, girlish exterior. ‘Whatever you think you saw you’ve put the wrong interpretation to it.’
‘That’s right, it wasn’t like—’
‘This is a respectable home.’ Phoebe cut through Josiah’s blustering as though he hadn’t spoken. ‘We’re respectable people. My mam and da’ - she took a gulp of air - ‘they’re respectable too. I’ve got bairns. I won’t have our good name dragged through the mud.’
‘You can’t be taking his side.’ Eve stared at the woman she had come to know and have affection for over the last months. She was shocked and hurt but above all angry.‘You can’t, Phoebe, not after what he’s done.’
‘He’s my husband.’
‘He’s a pervert. A man who likes little children, little girls. He’s sick, dirty.’
Again Phoebe’s eyes flickered. ‘I won’t have you saying these things.’
‘But you know it’s true.You do, don’t you, Phoebe?’
‘No.’ Even Phoebe’s lips were white. ‘No, I don’t, and I won’t have us cut off and shunned by everyone, I won’t. I-I’ve noticed things going missing. House-housekeeping money out of my purse.’ Josiah was staring at his wife but Phoebe did not glance his way.
Harshly, Eve said, ‘You’re making this up.’
‘If you go to the police station I shall swear it’s true.’
‘You’d really do that?’
Phoebe’s chin rose. ‘Aye.’ Her eyes never flinched from Eve’s as she repeated, ‘Aye, I would really do that. And with your attack on Josiah you would most likely be facing a prison sentence, and Nell and Mary, like Josiah said, would be put in the workhouse.’
Eve attempted to say something but the words stuck in her throat. She felt sick with disgust and disillusion.
The look on her face caused Phoebe’s countenance to crumple and her voice held a pleading quality when she next spoke. ‘Please, Eve, for the sake of the bairns.’
‘Whose bairns?’ Eve’s voice was no longer like that of a thirteen-year-old girl’s but someone far older. ‘Your boys? And what of Mary? She’s a bairn too.’
‘You heard what she said.’ There was relief as well as bravado in Josiah’s voice. ‘We’re on to you and the best thing you can do is clear off before you find yourself in real trouble.’
Phoebe turned her head and looked at her husband.The look shocked Eve as much as anything that had gone before. She would not have thought gentle Phoebe capable of such hatred.
‘Please, Eve, please don’t make me tell no one.’ Mary was tugging at her sleeve, whispering. ‘I couldn’t bear it, I couldn’t. Don’t make me. I’ll run away, I will.’
‘It’s all right.’ She patted her sister’s thin arm, her mind racing. She couldn’t bear the thought that Josiah was going to get away with what he had done, but what was the alternative? If Phoebe stuck to her guns, it would be their word against the married couple’s, and with Mary and Nell having bought sweets for who knew how long, it wouldn’t look good. Oh, why hadn’t Mary confided in her? How long had it been going on? What had he done to her? How could Phoebe lie for him when she’d looked as though she hated him? Eve felt sick, bewildered. If she reported Josiah to the law and it went against her, who would take care of Mary and Nell? Phoebe was right, it would be the workhouse for them, the very thing she had fought against all along. Looking at Josiah’s wife, she said, ‘You’ll live to regret this day.’
A spasm passed over Phoebe’s face but she did not answer.
‘Go and get your things together.’ Eve pushed Mary and Nell in front of her as she spoke and then turned to tell Josiah what she thought of him one last time, but as she did so he sat down suddenly on one of the hard-backed chairs, saying, ‘I feel bad.’
That gash would need stitching. The thought brought little satisfaction, she wished him dead, but as she followed her sisters out of the kitchen, she noticed Phoebe made no move towards her husband.
She hoped the pair of them drowned in misery from now on. As she climbed the stairs her eyes were dry but her heart was weeping for her sister. For that man to take a little lass who had just lost her da and brothers and betray her trust the way he’d done was wicked, evil, and Phoebe was as bad. Protecting him like that, she was as bad as him.
The anger kept her going while they packed their belongings into three parcels she made by ripping and knotting the sheets off the double bed. Apart from telling Mary and Nell the large trunk was too heavy to carry and they would have to send for it later when they were settled somewhere, Eve said nothing. For once her sisters were silent too. It was as though the three of them had agreed by unspoken consent that any questions and answers would be kept for when they had left the house. The only sound in the room was Mary sniffing.
When they were ready, the bible and her father’s harmonica at the bottom of her parcel, Eve squared her shoulders. She didn’t know where they were going to go or how they were going to manage without a penny to their name but they couldn’t spend another night under this roof. Anything, anything would be preferable to that.
‘Here.’ She stripped the blankets from the bed, folded them and gave one each to Mary and Nell and kept a third for herself. ‘We’ll likely need these and they’re ours anyway.’
They picked up their parcels and went down the stairs. Phoebe was standing in the hall.‘Where are you going to go?’ she asked quietly as Eve met her eyes.
Eve did not answer this. What she did say was, ‘I shall send for my father’s trunk later.’ She reached for her hat and coat hanging on one of the pegs in the hall and passed Mary hers. Nell had kept hers on since coming home from church.
‘Here.’ Phoebe held out a handful of coins. In answer to Eve’s raised eyebrows, she said awkwardly, ‘It’s your wage for last week which you gave me on Friday. I - I thought you’d need it.’
Eve stared at her. She was not going to refuse the money, they would need it. Besides which, she had earned it. She took the coins without comment, slipping them into the pocket of her coat.
‘Are you going to the vicarage?’ Phoebe was blocking their path to the front door. ‘Because if you say anything about Josiah to the vicar I’ll do what I said, Eve. I mean it.’
Still Eve said nothing, staring into the face of the woman she had thought of as a friend until today. Phoebe’s tone became soft, almost wheedling. ‘Try to understand.’
‘What do you want me to understand?’ Eve pushed roughly past her and opened the front door, gesturing for Nell and Mary to step down into the street.‘That you’re protecting him knowing he’s done such a terrible thing? Because y
ou do know, don’t you, Phoebe? Am I supposed to understand that you’re prepared to lie, to see me in gaol and Mary and Nell in the workhouse rather than speak the truth?’
Phoebe’s face was stiff, her voice low but hard now. ‘We took you in when you had nowhere to go. Don’t forget that.’
‘And you were paid for your trouble.You had the best of my parents’ things and my wage each week. You haven’t lost by it.’
They exchanged one last look and then Eve turned and followed Mary and Nell. The door banged shut behind her as she joined them on the pavement.
Chapter 4
They had reached the end of the street before Nell said, ‘Are we going to the vicarage, Eve?’
Eve shook her head but did not speak. Most folk were home from church now and although the street was not as crowded with bairns playing their games as on a weekday, there were still enough around to gape at them as they walked along carrying their parcels. She purposely did not glance at the houses they passed. She didn’t want to risk catching anyone’s eye.As they turned into Front Street and the Methodist chapel came into view, she saw Mr and Mrs McArthur standing talking to the new parson at the door to the chapel and kept her head down, breathing a sigh of relief once they were out of earshot. She didn’t know what she would have said to anyone if they had stopped her. She needed to think things through before she talked to anyone.
‘Where are we going then?’ Nell’s voice was small and choked.
‘Don’t cry, not now, neither of you.’ Eve glanced at them once before staring ahead. Their frightened faces pained her. ‘Wait till we get clear of any houses and into the country and then we’ll talk.’
‘Why aren’t we going to the vicarage?’
Eve swallowed deeply. The question was understandable but all she wanted was to get somewhere quiet and find out exactly what had gone on with Mary. She was sick with fear at what Josiah might have done. As calmly as she could, she said, ‘There’s no point, Nell. The vicar - well, I know his views. He wouldn’t take us in. He would be of the opinion the workhouse is there to cater for such a situation and we should be grateful for it. He’s on the Board of Guardians.’
Nell said no more.
They walked steadily for some time and it said much for Mary’s state of mind that she never spoke once, not even to complain her legs were aching or her parcel was heavy. The late September sun had little power to it and the walk in the fresh air would have been enjoyable under normal circumstances. Small flowers starred the green banks on either side of the dusty lane they came to, blackbirds and starlings squawking and quarrelling over the ripe blackberries covering the hedgerow. It was the sight of the berries that prompted Eve to say, ‘We’ll stop here for a bit. Are you hungry?’
Her sisters nodded warily. It was as though they weren’t sure if hunger were permissible at such a time.
‘We’ll pick some blackberries in a minute, but first’ - Eve plumped down on the grass, putting her parcel behind her and patting the bank either side of her - ‘we have to talk.’
Mary started to cry but she sat down. Eve put her arms round her sister as Nell joined them. ‘Don’t cry, hinny. This isn’t your fault, none of it, understand? It was him. He was wrong to do what he did. I have to understand what happened though, Mary.You must tell me it all, from the beginning. It’s important.’
Eve only had the sketchiest knowledge of the facts of life. Her grandma had already died when she had begun her monthlies and so her father had taken her next door to Mrs McArthur. That good lady had told her enough to comprehend what went on between a man and a woman and that it was vitally important to keep yourself to yourself until you were wed unless you wanted to end up in the workhouse with your belly full. Neither of her sisters had started their monthlies yet though, and Eve had never been so thankful for something in her life. The possibility of Mary’s small child’s body carrying a baby was unthinkable.
By the time Mary had finished speaking, Eve and Nell were sick to their stomachs, but a thin feeling of relief undergirded Eve’s revulsion. Some of the things Josiah had made Mary do to him were nauseating, but as far as she could ascertain he had not tried to violate her apart from once. Returning to this, Eve said gently, ‘When Mr Finnigan put his hand inside your knickers and hurt you, are you sure he didn’t do it again? Or anything else like that to your private place?’
Mary shook her curls. ‘He tried to but I cried and shouted and carried on and said I’d tell, and so he stopped.’
Eve stared at her sister. She felt disconcerted by the matter-of-fact way Mary had spoken and she could tell Nell did too. ‘But he wouldn’t stop doing those other things?’
Mary wriggled. ‘He said I was his special girl and he was nice sometimes. He-he gave me lots of things, sweets, money an’ that. Like Da and the lads did.’
‘But this was different, Mary.You do see that, don’t you? Da and the lads . . .’ She didn’t know how to put it. ‘They didn’t want you to do things that were wrong like Mr Finnigan. They loved you properly. They didn’t make you do anything you didn’t want to do.’
Mary stared at her, her big blue eyes shaded by their thick lashes. ‘Aye, I know.’
She had to ask. ‘Why didn’t you tell me what was going on, or Nell even? Did you think we’d be cross?’
Again the wriggle. ‘He said it had to be a secret and if I told we wouldn’t be able to stay and we’d be out on the streets. He said no one else would take us on and . . . he wanted to look after me. He said . . .’
‘What? What did he say?’
‘He said he loved me more than Phoebe an’ the bairns.’
‘Oh, hinny, hinny.’ Eve pulled Mary into her and hugged her fiercely.
The three girls spent that first night curled up together on a bed of bracken and moss in a sheltered spot under the thick hedgerow, wrapped in their blankets. Although the day had been mild it had become bitterly cold in the early hours, and Eve had awoken long before dawn. She lay stiffly in the darkness, trying to control her shivering so as not to wake her sisters.
She and Nell must find work soon. Somewhere far away from Stanley where no one would be aware of Nell’s real age. Her sister could easily pass for thirteen and that would have to be their story from now on. Mary looked exactly what she was, a bairn, but if she and Nell could find employment they could rent a room somewhere. She was used to making a penny stretch to two; somehow they would manage. They’d have to.
Worry about the future gnawed at her, along with hunger pains. The blackberries had been welcome but hardly filling. She must find a village shop once it was light and get something for them to eat, a loaf of bread and perhaps a bag of pig’s chitterlings and some cheese. Thank goodness the weather was holding; if it had been raining she didn’t know what they would have done.
They had to find work and somewhere to stay quickly. Panic threatened to overwhelm her. If it wasn’t for Mary, she and Nell could likely go into service, but no big house would set them on with a child in tow. But they couldn’t be separated.Whatever it took, they couldn’t be separated. She had let Mary down once, she wouldn’t do it again.
Hot tears seared her cold face and for the umpteenth time Eve asked herself how she could have been so blind to what had been going on. She would never forgive herself, and if her da and the lads were here they wouldn’t forgive her either.
Over the next little while this was a constant refrain at the back of Eve’s mind. She had never travelled further than the outskirts of Stanley before and had no idea where to make for or the best place to find work. This, added to the guilt she felt about Mary, made each day harder than the one before.
The first three days the weather remained clement and they were able to buy food from the villages they passed through. Every morning they found a stream to wash and drink from but although they looked presentable, there were no jobs to be had. Every night they found as sheltered a spot as possible and put on every item of clothing from their parcels, huddling togeth
er under their blankets but waking cold and damp. The fourth day was one of drizzling rain. Thankfully a farmer’s wife took pity on them and let them spend the night in the hay barn. In spite of the rats and mice scurrying about, it was the first time they’d slept soundly since leaving Stanley, but when Eve woke in the morning it was to the knowledge their money was all but gone and they were no nearer finding work or lodgings.
The farmer’s wife appeared at the bottom of the hayloft as they prepared to climb down. She shook her head at Mary’s cough which had got worse each night they had slept in the open, her eyes sweeping over them as one by one they climbed down the ladder to stand in front of her. ‘Ee, you shouldn’t be traipsing the countryside, now then.’ She patted Mary’s blonde curls, adding in an aside to Eve,‘They’d be fed and clothed in the workhouse, lass. There’s that to consider with the winter coming on.’
Eve stared at the round, kindly face. The farmer’s wife meant well, but she’d rather see them living the whole winter rough than go into that place.
The woman sighed as she took in Eve’s expression. ‘Aye, well, I can see you’ve made up your mind so I’ll say no more. Come away into the kitchen and have a bite afore you go, the three of you.’
Mary and Nell looked eagerly at Eve but she pressed her hands on their shoulders in silent warning. ‘I’m sorry but I can’t pay you much. Maybe just a hot drink if you’d be so kind?’ she said flatly.
‘A hot drink?’ The farmer’s wife smiled. ‘Aye, I can do that right enough, lass, and a bit more besides, but no more talk about payment. I’ve got five bairns myself and a couple of grandchildren. I wouldn’t like to think of any of them out on the road without a soul to help them on their way.’
Eve and Her Sisters Page 5