It had been so long since she’d felt those feelings. She fell back on the bed and covered her eyes with her arm. She felt like she’d just awoken from years of hibernation. Her body responded to Will just as strongly as ever. Her heart had no say in the matter, and that could be dangerous. Very dangerous.
She needed a plan. Tomorrow she would find out his schedule and make it a point to be gone before he got up. The evenings would be tricky, but she’d figure something out.
What did Will do now anyway? How could he afford to build a house like this and buy her grandparents’ old house? He must have done well for himself. She always knew he would. Before Juan died he and Will had planned to flip houses. Did he follow through? There were so many things she wished she could talk to him about. But that would be admitting she was curious and would only give him the wrong impression.
She walked to the window and looked at the moon and stars. How many nights had they lain together in the dark of night, looking for falling stars? And how many times had she wished for a happy life with Will? Wasted wishes were all they were.
She let the curtain fall back into place and went to find her clothes. She needed a bath and a good night’s rest to be able to cope with whatever tomorrow would bring. The bathroom door was open, so she assumed the door beside it would be the closet.
Hopefully her suitcases would be there. She didn’t relish the idea of sleeping in the nude with Will around. The closet opened into a large walk-in already filled with clothes. She took a few steps inside and stopped. Pants, skirts, dresses, parkas, down vests in a variety of colors hung from satin hangers. Folded in drawers were jeans, sweaters, and matching bra and panty sets in silk so fine she could almost see through them. Shoes of every variety were in clear boxes. Flats, heels, and boots took up an entire shelf.
She took a blue dress down and checked the size and frowned. The clothes were her size…five years ago. She really had no idea what size she wore in expensive clothes like these. Now she just went by size “small.”
She spun around and took in all the beautiful clothes. Will obviously didn’t care for her new look. These were Nicole’s clothes, not Sugar’s.
Her grandparents always had final approval over every outfit she wore. Will’s selections may be more age-appropriate for her, but he was still directing what she should wear. She liked her baggy jeans and plaid shirts. They were warm, comfortable and cheap, and she didn’t have to worry about getting them dirty. If she did, all she had to do was throw them in the washer. She refused to own another thing that had to be dry-cleaned.
Nicole picked up a brown leather boot in size seven and brought it to her nose and sniffed. Nothing smelled as good as a new pair of leather shoes. Will knew her so well; he knew her weakness and used it to his advantage. Nicole debated; she should put it back. Her hand went to put the boot back on the shelf. One more smell wouldn’t hurt. She knew the feel of good leather, and these were so soft. Wearing them would only make Will think he’d won. She pursed her lips, her decision made. She reached to put them back, but…maybe she could wear just this one pair of boots.
She peeked into the closest drawer and sighed before she pulled out a powder-blue bra-and panty-set…and maybe these too. He would never know she had them on. He certainly would never see them.
In the corner of the closet, she found her beat-up blue suitcase and found her clothes, Sugar’s clothes. She pushed the beautiful garments over to make room for her things. The obvious difference in the clothes hanging side by side was another reminder that she shouldn’t be here. She didn’t belong here anymore than her plaids and jeans did.
She grabbed one of her own sleep shirts and turned the light off in the closet and closed the door on a problem she would need to take care of tomorrow. For now, a shower and bed was what she needed.
“Your father and mother loved you so much.”
Nicole sat up in her bed and rubbed her eyes. Her grandfather stood at the foot of her bed, wearing his best Sunday suit with his brown felt hat in his hands. She closed her eyes tightly and opened them again. It couldn’t be… “Grandfather?”
“You were such a little thing when you came to live with us. At first it was hard to look at you. You resembled your father so much, even back then. You reminded me of the son I’d lost. I didn’t do right by you, Nicole. I never should have let your grandmother turn you into an old lady.”
“Grandfather?” Nicole sat very still and kept her eyes on her grandfather. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s time for me to say goodbye and to apologize. I know I never said it, honey, but I always loved you, and I’m so proud of how you turned out in spite of your grandparents.”
“Grandfather, I always knew you and grandmother loved me.”
“That young man loves you, Nicole. Life’s short you know. Don’t waste a minute of it on what’s not important.”
“Grandfather, wait! Grandfather!” A breeze caressed her face, and the faint smoky scent of her grandfather’s pipe tobacco lingered in the air.
Nicole sat up in bed, and rubbed her eyes, trying to erase the mightmare. Her dream, it had been so real. She was frightened and scared. What did it mean?
Tears filled her eyes; she knew only one cure. She needed Will. Will would make it better. She threw her legs over the side of the bed and was halfway to Will’s bedroom before her steps faltered and then stopped. What was she doing? After a few deep breaths, she turned back the way she came and headed downstairs. She didn’t need Will to chase away a bad dream any longer. What she needed was a cup of tea.
Her hands shook as she filled the tea pot with water from the sink. It took her a few tries before she found a cup and a tea bag. She should have known Will would have her favorite Earl Gray tea.
Water began to boil, but Nicole was so deep in thought she didn’t at first hear the kettle begin to whistle. She poured her tea, walked to the French doors. Calmness washed over her as she took in the moon casting a soft light over the mountains. The night called to her.
She pulled an afghan from one of the leather couches and silently let herself out of the house. She set her tea on one of the tables beside a green Adirondack chair and wrapped up in the blanket before curling her legs up under her in the chair.
Grandfather would have loved sitting out here. Her earliest remembrance of him had been sitting in his lap, looking at landscapes in a book. He’d tell her the types of trees in the picture and what they could be used for. All she could remember was cherry made good furniture. She’d thought he was talking about the cherries her grandmother kept in a jar in the kitchen for Tilda to make pineapple upside down cake. Tilda would let her drop one cherry into the ring of each pineapple and then she’d get to eat one for helping. She smiled at the memory and snuggled down deeper in the blanket.
Without her grandfather’s running interference with her grandmother, she never would have been able to spend as much time with Will. He’d known almost from the beginning about their friendship, yet he’d always kept their secret.
Her dream had seemed so real. She’d been frightened at first but now…she only felt peace. Her first reaction had been to go to Will. He’d always protected and calmed her after a bad dream. That was one of the many things she’d always loved about him. He always protected those he loved.
She missed Will so much it hurt. Being without him these past years had been the hardest thing she’d ever had to endure. Five years ago Will would have married a totally different woman. She had to ask herself, would their marriage have lasted? She’d been so young and weak back then. She had no idea who Nicole Montgomery really was or what she was capable of doing. She would have gone straight from her grandparents’ taking care of her to Will’s taking care of her without ever really knowing what she was made of. How long would that have been enough for him?
How long would she have been happy being only Will’s wife? Even as much as she loved him and wanted more than anything in t
he world to be his wife, she would have settled into being a wife and mother without ever knowing she was a strong and capable woman.
The hard truth was, she wanted Will back in her life. The big question seemed to be, could she open her heart and trust him not to break it again? Could they move forward as friends, and maybe someday, more? She really didn’t know.
Nicole leaned her head back against the chair and looked at the moon and stars. Eventually her eyes closed and in her dreams she was a little girl again walking with her grandfather.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Will exhaled for the first time since he’d knocked on Nic’s bedroom door and found the room empty. His first thought had been that she’d left. He’d relaxed somewhat when he discovered her truck still in the driveway. But until he found her asleep on the deck, he hadn’t been one hundred percent sure she hadn’t left him.
He looked down at Nic’s phone in his hand. The news wasn’t good, and he didn’t want to bring more sadness into her world. Her grandparents were the last family she had left. They cared for her and they raised her the best way they knew how. They just didn’t shower her with the love and attention she should have had.
But then, that had always been his job, and his family had loved Nic as if she were one of their own. He looked back through the glass at Nic sleeping. Her beauty had only matured through the years, and he needed her so badly. Nic would need him now whether she would admit that or not. With one last breath he quietly opened the door.
Nicole turned her head towards the sound of the door opening and closing. Will walked slowly towards her and held the phone out. “I knocked on your door and heard your phone ringing. When you didn’t answer, I worried, so I went in your room. You need to take this call, honey.”
Nic stared at the phone in his hand for a good sixty seconds. Finally her delicate hand reached out of the blanket. She held the phone to her chest and looked up to the sky and smiled before she held it to her ear.
Will didn’t know what to do. Should he leave and give her privacy or stay in case she needed him? He couldn’t leave her, so he took the seat beside her. He hoped he would never have to leave her again.
“Yes, ma’am.”
Will waited while Nic listened to her grandmother. He expected to see some emotion cross her face once she found out her grandfather had passed during the night.
“Yes, ma’am,” Nicole said peacefully, before she ended the call and set the phone on the table between them.
“Are you alright, Nic?” He sat on the edge of the chair and touched her hand. It was cold. He needed to get her inside and warmed up.
“Yes, thank you.”
Will didn’t like the emotionless glaze filling her eyes. He could feel her drawing away from him. “Is there anything I can do, honey?”
“No, thank you. Will, I’m afraid I can’t play with you today. I have to go home.”
He looked at her cold, pale, face; she was going into shock. “Okay, honey. I’ll call and have the plane ready, but first let’s get you in a nice warm bath.”
“That sounds nice, but I don’t think I can do that right now.” Her eyes focused straight ahead.
Will doubted she even saw the snowcapped mountains in the distance. “Let me help you.” Will didn’t wait for an answer. He scooped her up, blanket and all, and carried her into the house and up to her room. He let her feet drop to the floor. She would have fallen if he hadn’t been holding on to her.
He felt her cheeks; they were freezing. Gently he laid her on the bed and ran to turn on the bathwater. He called Babs, filled her in on what had happened and asked her to have the doctor come immediately. Before he could consider what he was doing, he walked back into the bedroom and stripped Nicole’s clothes from her frigid body and carried her to the bath, easing her down into the warm water.
Nicole grabbed his arm as he released her into the tub. “No, Will, don’t leave me.”
“I’m here, Nic. I won’t leave you.” Again, Will didn’t stop to think. Nic needed him. He stripped his clothes off and moved slowly into the tub, positioning himself behind her, their legs and bodies touching. Nic leaned back onto his chest as he methodically washed and rinsed her body, taking care of her. He ignored his body’s natural reaction to being that close to her. He felt her body warming and she began to relax against him.
Satisfied her body temperature was returning to normal, Will got them both out of the tub, dried her off and wrapped her in a fluffy, white towel. After tucking a towel around his hips, he carried her to the bed and left her only long enough to grab a silk nightgown from her closet. Once he had her dressed and under the down comforter, he pulled his jeans and sweater back on.
When the doorbell rang, Will took a last look at Nicole as she stared out the window, lost deep in thought. “Nic, I’ll be right back. I’m just going to go let the doctor in.” Will waited but Nic didn’t answer.
“Good morning, young man. Babs said Sugar isn’t feeling well.”
“Thank you for coming, Doctor. I think she’s in shock. She received news of her grandfather’s passing.”
After a brief exam Dr. Thompson gave her a mild sedative. Before the doctor had cleaned up and repacked his case, Nic had fallen asleep. The doctor left with instructions to call him if she was still disoriented when she woke.
While Nic slept, Will brought his computer into her room and worked on the small desk by the window so he could be near if she woke and needed him. He called his mom and asked her to go next door and open his house and stock the refrigerator. He wanted to offer Nic’s grandmother the option of staying with them while she was in town for the funeral. His assistant was already working on travel arrangements for her grandmother. His last call was to his pilot. He wanted to be in the air within the hour.
Her grandparents may have moved to Florida, but they considered Sweet Ridge home and that is where her grandfather wanted to be buried. When Will had all the arrangements in place, he packed a bag for each of them. He should be happy they were finally going home. That had always been his goal, but not this way.
With the truck packed, Will carried Nic, wrapped in the down comforter, to his truck and then onto his plane. With any luck, she would sleep until they landed.
Hours later Will still lay awake, unable to sleep. Nic lay beside him where he’d tucked her in for the night in the bedroom of the plane. Will smiled as he looked down at the precious body that had molded to his. Nic always snuggled up to him during the night, trying to get as close to the heat of his body as she could. She said he was her personal heater. He was glad to see that hadn’t changed. Her face was pressed into his chest and one of her creamy smooth legs was draped over his. He brushed back some of the auburn curls from her face and she stirred.
“Will…”
Will’s skin shivered her lips came into contact with his chest. “Yeah, baby.”
Nic threw a leg over his and scooted her body even closer. Her hand wandered over his chest exploring under his t-shirt. “I need you.”
He tried to do the right thing and move away before she realized how desperately he needed her. “I’m right here, honey.”
Nicole sat up in the bed and pulled her nightgown over her head. “No…I want you to make love to me.”
Will’s eyes went immediately to her breasts. He’d undressed her earlier and had only been concerned with helping her. Now, seeing those lush and rounded globes again he wanted more than anything to feel their weight in his hands, brush his thumbs over her nipples and watched them draw into peaks of pleasure before taking them into his mouth.
Will tore his eyes away and could only croak, “What?”
Nic moved closer and he felt the warmth of her breasts brush against his arm. “I’ve missed you so much. It’s been so long. Please, Will.”
Will closed his eyes and shook his head. She didn’t know what she was saying. “Honey, you’re upset. That’s not really what you…”
&nbs
p; A finger at his lips stopped his words. “Yes, it is,” she demanded.
Will saw the need in her eyes. But he couldn’t give her what she wanted. To do so would undermine his chance at reconciliation. He wouldn’t jeopardize that for anything in the world. “Nic, the next time we make love, I don’t want any clouds hanging over us. I want to know that you’ve forgiven me and that we have a future together. You’re feeling vulnerable because you just lost your grandfather.
“Oh, Will. No, I want to feel…”
“I know, baby.” He knew she wanted to feel alive and loved and not all alone. But at what risk. “I can’t give you that. But I can give you this. Let me take care of you, Nic.”
Will brushed his lips over Nic’s and felt her shiver from the connection they’d always had. He wanted more than anything to sink deep inside and hear those whimpers he’d been dreaming about for so long. But he knew that would only take them backwards and not forwards towards their forever.
No matter how badly his body wanted her, he’d be strong enough for both of them. He’d give her the release she needed without engendering regrets she may have in the light of day.
Kissing and nipping his way down her oh-so-familiar body, Will savored each moment of being able to touch her once again. He knew exactly where and how to kiss her to distraction. He paid particular attention to each hardened nub and was rewarded by her gasping moans of pleasure.
“Will, please.”
His own words came out strained. “I know, Nic.”
Will rained kisses over her stomach and heard her sudden intake of air when he nipped her left hip. So sensitive. So his. Lower his lips traveled until he paused over the very part of her he wanted to devour. He could smell her musky scent and had to take a moment to calm his racing heart. He pushed back her curls with his thumbs and gently blew across the swollen center of her being. Nicole whimpered and he could wait no longer. Leaning in he took her in his mouth and her taste burst upon his tongue. Her hips rose from the bed and Will moved to settle between her legs. He worked his hand under her bottom and pressed his face deeper into her wetness. His tongue slid over and around her beating core, teasing and taking her in.
You Promised Me Forever (The Dirty Ankle Series Book 1) Page 16