“She’s beautiful Mama!” Xzan exclaimed throwing herself into her mother’s arms. “But you shouldn’t have used your dress…”
Mama stopped her words with a slender finger across her lips.
“Shh. I love you. Nothing means more to me than my children… except,” she winked flirtatiously at her husband, “Papa of course.”
He wrapped his arms around her tweaking her bosom playfully. She blushed shooing his hand away.
“Paul not in front of the children!”
It was the best Christmas they ever had even though they had known more elaborate holidays. The handmade presents, sweets, even the humble potato pie and corn cakes for dinner were the best of all because love was the miracle that they celebrated that year. They sang carols gathered around the piano as Mama played. Her sweet soprano led them while Papa harmonized slightly off-key in his tenor. The children followed suit mixing up the words making up the ones they didn’t know by heart. The effect was poignant.
Xzan knew it was a holiday she would never forget. She held baby Dawn in her arms. An incredible sense of joy filled her heart so full she believed she would never feel anything quite so wonderful again and she longed to hold on to it forever.
Chapter Two
Grannie Winslow sold all her jewels retaining only her beloved wedding ring. Mama sacrificed her precious heirlooms. Treasures that had been stored in the attic all these years safe from prying, bumbling fingers. Xzan continued working as needed for Mrs. Miller. It wasn’t lucrative but every little bit helped. Sporadically the generous lady would send home treats for the family. Leftover pies or meats. Raiment her own household had outgrown or was tired of.
Papa found a station at long last in the new bank that opened in town. It wasn’t the prestigious position he’d held previously in that field and he had to toil longer hours but they didn’t have to sell their farm after all. Paul came bounding up the front steps early one afternoon. Spinning his spouse around gleefully and carrying her into the house he slammed the library door shut with his foot against inquisitive ears. Rebecca giggled breathlessly as he lowered her to her feet swaying dizzily as she tried to recover her balance. Her husband steadied her grinning.
“I feel like a new man! I can’t wait to tell you all about it.”
Rebecca sat on the green velvet sofa by the bay windows patting a spot invitingly next to her.
“I can’t wait to hear it.”
He reclined pulling her close toying with her wedding band. It was a nervous habit when he was jittery about something momentous.
“There’s a client at the bank…I supervise all his transactions. He’s quite wealthy. We’ve gotten to be chums over the past few months. His name is Nicolas Colby.”
Paul twisted her ring tightening his clasp of her hand continuing.
“We were conferring today. It appears Nicolas is interested in financing a shipping venture. He’s predisposed to take a chance on me since I’ve had prior qualifications and he knows I’m scrupulous.”
Rebecca gasped knowing it was Paul’s aspiration to try again. But he’d never had the capital to back him since the Becky sank. This was a miracle!
“Does he know about our ship?” she asked eagerly.
“Yes… like he said though… we had four good years with no problems. If this is a success we both stand to make a fortune. I could buy another ship then use the money to reinvest. We might be well off in a few years.”
Rebecca hugged him exuberantly.
“That’s wonderful, Darling! When does he want to make the arrangements?”
Paul tensed releasing her abruptly rising to pace. Running a bony hand through his receding hairline his voice deepened anxiously.
“Straight away. There’s only one dilemma. Nicolas is a businessman. He expects some sort of guarantee. He wants our farm as collateral.
“You can’t be serious! He expects you to stake everything and he’ll hazard nothing. He’s already rich. That’s not fair.”
“I’m afraid it’s laudable business sense Becca. As much as I maintain it would be fine there is still the potentiality it might be… a disaster. I can’t take that gamble unless you’re willing to take it too.”
He peered at her intently. She yearned between wanting to back him show him she believed in him and pointing out the ruination if it failed. He saw the conflicting sentiments on her fragile countenance. Knew she was warring internally. Ultimately her expression cleared. She set her chin stubbornly beautiful eyes flashing defiantly.
“I believe in you Paul. I have from the first moment we met. I have never regretted taking a chance on you in the past and I will continue risking all to go forward with you in the future. I can’t influence the elements or pirates. But if you’re confident it is a risk worth taking… I’ll endorse you for better or worse.”
She rushed into his arms clinging, praying she had made the right decision. Like her husband she longed for so much more for their dynasty. Paramount above all else to see that the light shining in his eyes today remained forever. He had been defeated too long. Rebecca couldn’t condemn him to remain empty until his dying day.
*****
Before the contract was signed Nicolas Colby died of a lung ailment. Papa sealed himself in the study for two days when he received the communique. He was inconsolable. Not only for the unforeseen demise of his friend but his dreams as well. There would never be another chance such as this one.
On the fifth morning Rebecca shaking from nerves distressed and depleted, lost her temper. Marching up to the locked door she pounded it furiously.
“Paul Edgar Winslow… open this door immediately! I will not allow you to ignore this family one more day while wallowing in self-pity!”
Paul opened the door stunned. In fifteen years of matrimony he’d never heard his wife raise her voice to him and rarely to the children. In fact he’d barely ever even seen her riled. His disheveled visage was almost her undoing. Sorrel whiskers had sprouted under his chin. His eyes were puffy from either want of sleep, crying or imbibing in too much spirits. His roan suit was rumpled and he reeked of stale cigar fumes. She remained inflexible despite the fact that her heart melted when she saw how devastated he still felt.
“Breakfast is ready. I expect you to join us there. You need to eat. The children and I don’t understand why you have rejected us all.”
With that she turned as majestically as a queen head held regally and was gone with a swish of pink silk. Paul joined his family for breakfast. Afterward he cleaned up, dressed and went to work. He didn’t lock himself away anymore but was like a condemned man serving a prison sentence. Never smiling, mumbling a riposte when spoken to. After several weeks the whole family became moody and dejected. Snapping irritably. The littlest children cried and griped incessantly till Rebecca was ready to pull her hair out in frustration. Then Papa came home one evening smiling and bringing a guest. He introduced his family jovially to the stranger.
“Everyone this is Mr. Colby’s son… Brett. Brett… I’d like for you to meet my mother…Edwina Winslow.”
Grannie ogled the young man shrewdly. He was an attractive devil. His dress was impeccable. Dove gray trousers with a matching vest and jacket. An immaculate blue ruffled dress shirt and knee high black boots polished to a spit shine. Intelligent eyes converged with hers undaunted. Bowing over her wizened hand he chivalrously murmured, “Enchanted, I’m sure.”
In turn the raven-haired man was introduced to each member of the Winslow family. Dispassionately charming to every female down to two- year-old Dawn. Brett shook the boys hands in a manly fashion feigning their grips were so strong it wounded his hand.
Infrequently having visitors and never one so captivating as Brett they all bubbled over with enthusiasm making for a stimulating evening. Mammy twittered like a schoolgirl when Brett flattered her over dinner praising her culinary skills. Xzan’s mouth dropped open when she observed the woman positively simpering and batting her eyelashes at the man
coquettishly.
Mama though utterly devoted to Papa had a sparkle about her facade as well. Star and Twilight now nine, identical blondes with Papa’s emerald eyes, stood on either side of the gentleman heeding his every word in adoration. Dawn sat perched on his knee gazing worship-fully up into his lissome face innocently delighted to have the closest proximity.
Xzan was as impressed as the rest of her family. Brett Colby was the most striking man she’d ever seen. To a fourteen-year-old girl who had blossomed promisingly early in life and was old enough to be courted, Brett aroused a certain physical fascination despite the fact he was nearly as elderly as Papa.
“Xzan your father tells me you play the piano by ear… have in fact composed some of your own music.”
She blushed with his attention riveted on her. She was sitting between her parents her feet daintily together with her back ramrod straight as Mama had taught her. Adorned in a light blue silk her first full length dress, one Mama had helped her fashion from some of Mrs. Miller’s hand-me-downs, she felt very mature indeed. With dark hair caught up in a matching bow falling into a riot of curls over her shoulders Xzan was an arresting picture of loveliness. She lowered ebony lashes shyly looking down at her fingers stammering with embarrassment.
“I…I…I… don’t know how others…perceive my music… however I do enjoy playing… immensely.”
“Then perhaps you would entertain us with a melody or two. It has been a long time since I’ve had the pleasure of hearing music. I do own a piano but unfortunately I don’t play.”
Xzan acquiesced trembling so unnerved she was terrified she might humiliate herself. However once her eyes were closed blocking out the people in the room and she felt the familiar notes beneath her fingertips she played superbly. Brett smiled admiringly applauding the loudest with ingenuous praise when she finished. He made it a point to thank her again complimenting her talent as he left. Kissing the palm of her hand it seemed he held it a bit longer than was conventional. Xzan was too shaken and excited to meet his eyes or fathom his motives. Even in her inexperience she had the distinct feeling he was paying more than just a friendly mindfulness to her. The thought thrilled and frightened her.
Floating up to her room quiet so as not to disturb Dawn and the twins, who shared her space and were already asleep, she disrobed leisurely reliving the highlights of the entire evening. Taking care not to wrinkle her dress she hung it carefully over a chair and donned a prim nightgown. Brushing the tangles out of long tresses she allowed her girlish thoughts to drift while romanticizing Brett Colby. She fell asleep still basking in the warmth of his attention.
*****
Brett became a frequent caller at the Winslow farm. When he offered Paul the same business deal his father had Paul jumped on it afraid to let this second chance slip through his hands again.
The voyage was a success. The day they received the news Papa was so lofty with happiness he accepted Brett’s marriage proposal to Xzan thrilled at the prospect of settling his oldest with such an illustrious man. He was good looking, charming, intelligent, wealthy and ambitious. The age difference didn’t really matter since it was no secret that his daughter had been obviously infatuated with the man since their first meeting.
“It is up to Xzan of course whether or not she accepts your proposal.” Paul warned him, not really seeing any need for alarm. He couldn’t imagine Xzan would put any resistance to the notion. “I would be delighted to have you for a son-in-law.”
Brett departed jubilantly imploring Paul to have a discussion with Xzan that evening and to let him know whether or not to pursue his suit immediately. He also reminded Paul of the stipulation in his father’s will.
Nicolas Colby has seen fit to interfere even in death as he had in life with his son’s future. Brett had married at twenty losing his young wife to a fever only a few months after their wedding. At thirty-two he had seemed in no hurry to replace his bride or create an heir. Nicolas had left Brett a fortune with a clause in his will that if he hadn’t married and sired a son within three years that his entire estate would be donated to charity.
Perhaps it was the concern of a sensible man who had worked hard to garner his wealth truly concerned for his own son’s future. Or it might have been that he was determined to control his son even after he departed. Whatever the case Brett had confided in Paul that his attraction to Xzan was genuine. However because of the rapidly diminishing time margin he felt rushed to declare his suit and not to pursue a lengthy engagement.
*****
“I will do whatever you think is best for me Papa.” Xzan agreed timorously.
Paul grinned broadly at his daughter elated seizing her in an affectionate bear hug. Despite her unmistakable enchantment with Brett Colby the reality of being married to any man might be alarming for one so young. To a fourteen-year-old Brett might seem antiquated no matter what his charms.
“He’ll take good care of you little one.” Papa reassured himself as much as her a trifle nervous. Any father would be at the prospect of losing his daughter to another man. “He’s mature, wealthy and attractive. I don’t know if you’ll ever have another opportunity for such a match or I wouldn’t even consider it at your age. Living out so far your resources are limited to meet suitable young men.”
Xzan silently agreed thinking about Hattie Miller’s beaus the past few months. Country bumpkins. If those were her alternatives she personally would just as soon remain a spinster. She still couldn’t believe Brett had asked for her hand. It was like a dream you wish for on a star coming true beyond your wildest hopes. She had wanted to be his wife since that first night he’d kissed her hand. Longed to be more than just a gauche schoolgirl in his eyes.
Papa continued.
“He has to marry forthwith in order to meet the terms of his inheritance. He’s reassured us that he won’t pressure you into assuming your wifely duties until you’ve had time to accustom yourself to him and your marital status. He knows you’ve never been courted and it will be hard for you to adjust to being so far away from home in strange surroundings.”
Papa took her small hands in his probing deeply into the huge blue eyes she’d inherited from her mother. They gazed back filled with love and trust as she listened entranced by his every word.
“Why if I hadn’t known his father you might never have had this chance at all to meet a man of his caliber.”
Xzan’s lips curved upward in that old as the hills smile patting her father’s arm philosophically.
“I understand Papa… really I do. Part of you wants to keep me your little girl…while the other part wants to send me out in the world armed with the best shield you can find. I’ll marry Brett. I will be a good wife to him when he thinks I’m mature enough to accept that role in his life. I’ll miss you and Mama terribly… but we all knew this day would come someday. It’s the natural order of things.” Then mischievously, “At least he’s not Claude Thomas. I’d have to escape down my trellis alone. I’m afraid I haven’t found anyone but Brett I’d care to elope with.”
Paul burst out laughing. So Rebecca had gotten around to confiding their past. He wondered just how much of the story had been edited. Knowing his wife all but the most innocent details. He marveled at his daughter’s theories. She seemed to believe that everything had meaning. Took life in stride no matter what might materialize unexpectedly. Maybe she wasn’t too pubescent for matrimony after all. Brett’s maturity would be a bonus for her. She’d never be bored with someone who was as stimulatingly knowledgeable as he was. She in turn would be the world through new eyes for him.
She deserved the best. The man could provide it. Paul was thrilled with the match and the way his daughter had responded to the offer. She had alleviated any qualms he’d had as a parent. He would set up a meeting with Brett to allow the man to propose to her properly and speak to him about the arrangements afterward. With his arm wrapped snugly around the soon bride to be he swung open the door calling out exuberantly, “We
’re going to have a wedding!”
*****
The next evening Brett was left alone in the library with Xzan. Dressed in his best suit, dark hair freshly cut and slicked back with a rakish curl falling over his forehead he was incredibly handsome. His dark eyes sparkled almost black in anticipation of the moment. Xzan licked her lips nervously. She too was bedecked in her finest gown. An emerald silk trimmed with black lace around the modest neckline and puffy sleeves. Her riotous curls had been tamed into a soft french knot at the base of her slender neck with only a few escaping tendrils prettily accenting her forehead and earlobes.
“I want to do this properly.”
Pulling a small jewel case from his coat pocket he approached her calmly. Heart pounding out of control, distinctly overheated by his proximity, she almost swooned as the tall gentleman sank to one knee directly at her feet staring boldly in her eyes.
“I realize that you are very young and this is very sudden. I’m sure your father explained to you about my father’s will. I would have preferred to have courted you for a few years given you the time to perhaps consider other suitors before taking such a huge step. Regrettably I don’t have that time to give. I care deeply for you even though we’ve only known each other for a short while.”
If Xzan had any reservations they faded at that moment. As Brett opened the miniature box to reveal a huge diamond solitaire she swayed light-headedly reaching out to hold on to his shoulders to keep from swooning. He felt solid, real under her fingertips. Alarmingly male. She caught the faint whiff of his cologne. It was brisk and spicy. The reality of the situation struck her like a ton of bricks. This man would take her from her home, touch her, spend the rest of his life with her as her best friend, they would have children and create a home for them. It was exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. Her dainty fingers trembled as his large hand reached up to enfold them. Dark eyes met her blue ones reverently.
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