by King, Karen
Seb was dressed in a smart jacket and black chinos with a red tie. ‘We’d better get going,’ he said. They were taking a taxi to the registry office so that they could have a glass of wine at the meal at a local restaurant after the ceremony.
Her father, Maria and Emma were already waiting for them outside the registry office when they arrived. Maria looked beautiful, her dark hair swept up into a chignon and a diamond necklace gleaming around her neck – a wedding present from Gareth. Her dad looked so smart in his dark grey suit, white shirt and emerald-green tie. As she walked towards them, Lily saw Maria smile down at Emma, who looked up and smiled back. Lily felt her eyes prick with tears as she saw the love in the little girl’s upturned face.
The wedding ceremony was quick but beautiful, and Lily brushed away tears as her father said his vows, vows similar to the ones he must have said to her and Emma’s mother all those years ago. When the rings were exchanged and Gareth and Maria kissed, Emma clapped loudly. ‘Now I have a mummy again,’ she said.
Lily swallowed and Seb put his arm around her shoulder reassuringly. She should be pleased that Emma was so happy to have Maria as a stepmother. She was pleased.
Once they were outside, Lily handed Maria the silver horseshoe and card she had bought her and kissed her on the cheek. ‘Welcome to the family.’
‘Thank you, Lily.’ Maria smiled at her fondly.
Seb took some photos with his iPhone. Then a passer-by offered to take a photo of them all so Seb could be in the photo too. He stood beside Lily, his arm around her waist, his presence calming her down. Lily and Maria had started to build bridges the other night when they’d shared a glass of wine, and she was determined to be happy for her dad and Emma.
Lily smiled all through the lunch and raised a toast to the happy couple, grateful for Seb’s support. When she slipped off to the washroom to tidy up her make-up, Maria followed her in a couple of minutes later. ‘I wanted to thank you for coming to our wedding, Lily. I know it must be difficult for you to see your father remarry so soon.’
Lily finished applying her lipstick, slid the top back on then turned to Maria. ‘It was difficult at first, but only because I worry about him and Emma. It’s all fine now. I can see that they are both happy and I’m pleased he’s found someone to share his life with.’
‘Thank you. You don’t know how much your words mean to me. And you can rest assured that I love Gareth and Emma very much. I promise you that I will do anything in my power to make them both happy and keep them from harm,’ Maria replied.
They walked back out to the table together, and Lily relaxed and enjoyed the rest of the afternoon. The meal was delicious, and her father ordered a bottle of champagne, and they all – even Maria – had a couple of glasses. Maria’s eyes were sparkling; she looked the picture of happiness, Lily thought, relaxing. At least now she could stop worrying over her dad and Emma and live her own life, concentrate on her relationship with Seb.
* * *
It wasn’t until later, as she was about to drop off to sleep, that Maria’s words flashed across her mind. ‘I promise you that I will do anything in my power to make them both happy and keep them from harm.’
She shivered and sat bolt upright.
What an odd thing to say, ‘keep them from harm’. What did she mean?
She looked down at Seb sleeping beside her, longing to wake him and tell him, but she knew he would think she was being melodramatic and tell her that she should stop being so suspicious of Maria.
She lay back down and closed her eyes. Maria hadn’t meant anything; she’d simply been trying to convince Lily of how much she loved her father. Let it go, Lily, she told herself.
*
I’ll be out soon. I can hardly believe it. Free at last. I’ve been here so long; years, months, weeks, days have passed slowly by. I thought I would never get out. That I was destined to spend the rest of my life here, a prisoner. I’ve lost everything, my family, my home. Myself. But soon it will all be over. Then, once I’m out, I’ll find her. I won’t rest until I do.
15
Lily
Late January – Five months before Emma disappeared
Lily walked up the path to the front door. The lawned garden was immaculate, the windows gleamed, as did the mahogany front door. She didn’t know how Maria found the time to keep the house so spotless, look after Emma, put a home-cooked meal on the table every evening and run her own beauty salon, never mind all the charity work she was involved in. Lily wondered if she ever slept.
Lily pressed the bell and waited for Maria to answer. She still had a spare key in case of emergencies but hadn’t used it since that time when she’d returned from holiday and found Maria living there. She’d decided to pop around for an hour as Seb was on a call out and she hadn’t seen her dad or Emma all week.
‘Lily, how nice to see you.’ Maria’s face was bright and welcoming, as always. ‘Your father is out but Emma will be pleased.’
Emma was delighted to see her. She came running to her and flung her arms around Lily’s waist. ‘Lilyyyy! Can I come and stay at yours tonight?’ she begged.
‘Of course…’ Lily went to say but Maria shook her head.
‘Not this weekend, darling. Remember we’re having a movie night tonight and going out tomorrow.’
‘Oh, yes. I forgot.’ Emma clapped her hands in delight.
‘Maybe next week then?’ Lily asked, anxious to spend some time with her little sister. Emma hadn’t had a sleepover at Lily and Seb’s since before the wedding two months ago.
‘Emma, why don’t you go and get your new shoes to show Lily,’ Maria suggested.
As soon as Emma left the room, Maria turned to Lily. ‘It’s very kind of you, Lily, and I know you like to spend time with Emma, but Gareth and I are anxious that she doesn’t feel rejected since our marriage. It’s important that we bond together as a family unit first. So if you wouldn’t mind leaving it for another month or two before Emma stays over at yours? You’re obviously very welcome to pop in and see her.’
Lily stared back at her, dumbfounded. How the hell was Emma staying over at hers and Seb’s – the little girl’s second home – rejecting her? But before she could find the words to reply Emma had returned wearing a new pair of shiny black shoes with flowers splattered over them.
‘Aren’t they pretty?’ she said in delight.
‘Gorgeous,’ Lily agreed, inwardly seething at Maria. Now she’d got her feet under the table it seemed that she was trying to shut Lily out of Emma’s life.
* * *
‘I’m her sister, for God’s sake. I’ve been looking after Emma for years and now she can’t even stay over at our house. I feel like Maria doesn’t trust me,’ Lily exploded as soon as she got home.
‘Come on, Lil, she’s just trying to be a good stepmum. It can’t be easy. And they don’t have much family time, do they? What with your dad and Maria both working and Emma at school,’ replied Seb, obviously thinking she was overreacting again.
‘You’re always on her bloody side!’ Lily snapped. She stormed upstairs and slammed the bedroom door. It frustrated her that Seb couldn’t see how Maria was slowly trying to shut Lily out of the family. She hardly saw her father and Emma now. Lily and Seb had been invited over for dinner on Christmas day, which had been nice but they usually went over in the morning and Lily had missed seeing her little sister’s excited face as she unwrapped all her presents. Then, since the new year had rolled around, Maria and her father had been busy at weekends with her father having meetings with his clients and Maria taking part in various charity events. Emma went to her childminder Hazel’s after school, so the only way Lily got to see Emma was if she popped in from work on a Friday, like today, as her little sister was allowed up later then, or occasionally on a Sunday afternoon. She felt like she was losing contact with her family.
When Lily had told Jenni at work, she’d suggested that Seb might be relieved they didn’t have to spend so much time looking a
fter Emma.
‘Seb loves Emma. He’s never shown a hint of resentment about the time she spends with us,’ Lily had protested.
‘Think about it, Lil – you hadn’t been together long when your mum was ill. It’s only natural for Seb to be glad that you can spend more time together as a couple. It’s got to have been hard for him.’
She guessed that Jenni was right, and she was glad to have more time with Seb alone too, but she loved her little sister and enjoyed spending time with her. And the fact that her father had remarried wasn’t going to stop her doing that. So from then on she’d made a point of going around every Friday after work, taking a small gift for Emma with her. Her father was rarely in then, so sometimes Emma and Seb also popped over for an hour on Sunday afternoons so that she could see him. Maria made her welcome but Lily couldn’t help feeling that she was counting the minutes until they left. And she felt uncomfortable with how overprotective Maria was with Emma: even when she was playing upstairs, she would constantly go up and check on her.
‘Maria must make Emma nervous, watching over her like that,’ Lily had said as she and Seb walked home after a Sunday afternoon visit. ‘She’s scared to let her out of her sight. It’s a wonder she allows her to go to school and Hazel’s.’
‘It’s all new to her, she’ll settle down. And Emma seems happy. It’s nice to see your dad looking so relaxed too,’ Seb had replied.
Lily had to agree that he was right but she wished Maria would relax around Emma more. She’d be making her little sister a bag of nerves at this rate.
16
Lily
March – Three months before Emma disappeared
Finally, to Lily’s delight, Emma was staying overnight as Gareth and Maria had gone out to the theatre. It was their first night out since they’d been married and Lily had almost jumped up and down with relief when her father had asked if she could look after Emma. Seb had been called out to deal with a broken pipe emergency so it would just be her and Emma all evening. That would give them plenty of time to chat.
‘Isn’t this fun? We haven’t had a sleepover for ages,’ she said as they sat on the sofa watching a Disney film.
Emma nodded, shoved another handful of popcorn in her mouth and scoffed it before replying. ‘Maria doesn’t like me to have sleepovers. She likes us all to be together, cos we’re family.’
‘I’m family too though, so it’s nice for me and you to spend some time together.’ Lily paused, wondering how to phrase her next question. ‘I bet you’re enjoying having a new mummy, aren’t you?’
Emma nodded again. ‘Maria’s fun. She plays games with me. And we bake cakes and make things, and she reads me a bedtime story every night.’ She reached over for her beaker then frowned when she saw that it contained fizzy orange pop. ‘Maria doesn’t like me to have fizzy drinks because they ruin my teeth.’
‘But it’s your favourite drink, and one now and again won’t hurt you, as long as you brush your teeth well before you go to bed.’
Emma shook her head. ‘I don’t want my teeth to fall out. Can I have water, please? Bottled water, not tap.’
‘Yes, of course.’ Lily went into the kitchen, got a fresh beaker out of the cupboard then filled it with bottled water. She shouldn’t mind – it was healthier for Emma to drink water – but she hoped Maria wouldn’t pass all of her health fads over to Emma; the little girl could be a finicky eater as it was.
‘Thank you.’ As Emma reached for the water her hand knocked over the beaker of orange pop, spilling it onto the floor. ‘Sorry!’ she said, jumping up, her eyes wide and panic on her face.
‘It’s okay, I should have taken it into the kitchen. I’ll go and get a cloth to wipe it up.’
When she came back with the cloth, Emma was sitting on the sofa tapping her left wrist with two fingers of her right hand.
‘What are you doing, darling?’ Lily asked her.
‘I was upset about spilling the pop so I’m calming myself down. Maria showed me how to do it,’ Emma told her.
It worried Lily that her little sister should get upset about spilling a drink. And that she was tapping to cope with stress. Maybe Emma wasn’t as happy as she seemed.
She wiped up the pop then sat down, wrapped her arm around her little sister’s shoulders and gave her a squeeze. ‘Does Maria get cross when you spill a drink?’ she asked.
‘No, she never gets cross. She’s very kind. She never shouts at me.’
‘Never? Even if you’re really naughty?’
‘Nope. She sends me to my room, then she comes up and sits on the bed and talks to me. Then I say sorry and I can come out of my room again.’
Lily thought of all the tantrums Emma used to have, how nothing she or Gareth did used to soothe her. If they sent her up to her room, she would have a screaming fit, take everything out of her wardrobe and drawers and throw it all over the room. It would take ages for her to calm down. Had Maria taught her tapping to help her control her tantrums? Lily didn’t like Emma getting so upset about a spilt drink though. Was something troubling her?
‘So you’re happy then that Daddy and Maria are together?’
‘I wish Mummy was here, but Maria is nice.’ Emma looked a bit wistful and Lily felt a lump form in her throat. She shouldn’t be questioning her like this; she didn’t want to make her sad. ‘Daddy is happy too. He sings,’ Emma added.
‘Does he?’ Lily remembered how her father was always singing around the house when she was younger, mainly country and western songs. He was a good singer, she used to love listening to him, but then her mother had become ill and Dad’s singing had stopped. Or had it stopped before then, when he’d found out about her mother’s affair? She had no idea as she had moved out by then. Poor Emma had grown up in a house of illness and grief – Lily should be pleased that things were better for her sister now. She was pleased.
She gave Emma a hug. ‘Does Maria sing too?’ she asked.
‘Yes, she sings with Dad sometimes.’ Emma turned to face her, her blue eyes wide. ‘She can’t sing very good though, but we don’t tell her.’
Lily smiled. So Maria couldn’t do everything, and that actually made Lily like her stepmother more.
‘Maria said that I’m extra special because she’s always wanted a daughter. She can’t have children. Her tummy can’t grow them.’
Lily was surprised to hear that. Her father had never mentioned it. ‘Did Maria tell you that? About her tummy?’ she added to make sure her question was clear.
Emma nodded. ‘I asked her why she didn’t have a baby and she said that her tummy won’t grow them so she’s really pleased she met Daddy because now she can share me.’
Lily felt a wave of sympathy for her stepmother; it must be awful not to be able to have children. Although she and Seb were in no rush to have a family, it was something they’d both talked about and had agreed they wanted in a few years’ time. Lily would be devasted if she couldn’t have any. Poor Maria. No wonder she idolised Emma.
The door opened and Seb walked in, interrupting Lily’s thoughts. His eyes were tired but there was a big smile on his face. ‘Girlie night, is it? Can I join you or am I banned?’
‘Of course you can, but you might want to take a quick shower first,’ Lily told him.
Seb grinned. ‘I think you’re right. Save some of that popcorn for me, Munchkin, I’ll only be a few minutes.’
He was soon back, showered and changed into jeans and a T-shirt, and joined them for the rest of the film.
Later, when Emma was tucked up in bed, Seb wrapped his arms around Lily and asked, ‘Do you feel more settled now that you’ve been able to spend a whole evening with Emma and have a chat to her? Has it confirmed that everything’s okay?’
‘Yes, it’s been great and Emma seems really happy.’ She paused. ‘Emma said that Maria told her she couldn’t have children of her own. Dad’s never mentioned that. Do you think he knows?’
‘I’m sure he does, but it’s their private busi
ness, isn’t it?’
Lily nodded. ‘I guess so. I wonder if that’s why she’s so overprotective of Emma.’
‘Maybe, but now they’ve settled into married life a bit I’m sure you’ll see more of your dad and Emma. We’re going over for Easter dinner next Sunday, aren’t we? Things are settling down.’
Lily nodded. Seb was right, and her little sister was happy. That was all that mattered.
17
Maria
Easter
The bedroom door burst open and Emma came running in. ‘Daddy! Maria! Is it time for the Easter egg hunt yet?’
Gareth propped himself up on his elbow and smiled at her. ‘I don’t think the Easter bunny comes until after lunch. Isn’t that right, Maria?’
Maria stifled a yawn. ‘I think he might come earlier this year. Give me a minute, sweetie, and I’ll come and do your breakfast. Then we can see what Easter eggs the Easter bunny has left.’
‘You stay in bed a while. You were up late last night preparing dinner for today. I’ll do Emma’s breakfast and bring you a cup of tea.’ Gareth kissed her on the forehead and got out of bed.
‘I don’t mind…’ Maria told him.
‘I insist.’ Gareth’s eyes were full of concern. ‘You rest a bit, you look exhausted.’
‘I am and a cup of tea in bed would be lovely, darling. Thank you.’ Maria closed her eyes wearily. She was exhausted. She’d been up late preparing the food for the meal today and had a restless night because no matter how many years had passed, she could never forget that Easter. The Easter twenty-two years ago, the Easter that changed her life forever.