by Jill Shalvis
“Yeah, you’re ready,” he said on a rough breath. Planting his hands on either side of my head, he braced his weight above me, arms trembling.
“Hurry, Kel.”
He let out a short, unsteady laugh. “Yeah, that might not be a problem.” Leaning in, he sank his teeth into the crook of my neck just as he thrust inside me, large and thick, with the exact right amount of rough.
I cried out and wriggled my hips for more, but he held me still with a grip of steel.
“Hold on.” His teeth grated together. “Just…hold on a minute.”
I spared a thought to wonder what I’d done with my easygoing Kellan McInty, because the guy towering over me, pressing me down with his weight, holding me where he wanted me, an edgy light in his eyes, was as far away from that guy as possible.
He pulsed inside of me, and I pulled my legs back and arched up.
“Don’t move. God, don’t even breathe.”
I tried—I really did—but it was like what I’d been taught in every science class I’d ever had. The more effort I put into not moving, the more difficult it became. I couldn’t regulate my breathing; I sounded ragged and out of control to my own ears. I couldn’t stay still either; I just couldn’t get over the feel of him, thick and hard and silky smooth inside of me, and I lifted my hips for more.
“Fuck,” he said, sounding strained. “Oh fuck.” And he began to move, slowly at first, but that didn’t last, because I sank my nails into him, making him thrust deeply, bumping me up against the couch. But it was worth the rug burns, because his movements were sending shock waves of pleasure through me.
I bit his throat, and he groaned, sinking his fingers into my hair, tugging my head back, until I had no choice but to stare up at him, utterly imprisoned by his piercing, startlingly clear eyes.
“Rach…”
I already knew. He was gone, completely gone, and I couldn’t tear my eyes off him. It was as if I couldn’t just see into him, but I could also hear his thoughts, which were filled with me, with this, with what else he wanted to do to me…and how this was different for him than it’d ever been before.
Or was that my thought?
Oh God. It was mine. And it was different than it’d ever been with anyone else: deeper, stronger, more. Somehow so much, much more.
And as I stared up at him, aroused beyond belief, too stunned to speak, he somehow managed to smile down at me, and I thought, Yeah, it’s going to be okay. He’s going to make it okay.
And he did.
Oh, how he did.
I woke up slowly, stiff and desperate for caffeine, but that was nothing new. When I was growing up, my mother used to throw a pillow at me from the doorway of my bedroom and then bolt, leaving me to wake up slowly and alone, like I always seemed to need to do.
But I wasn’t at my mother’s house. I was as far from home as I’d ever been. And remembering, I sat straight up in the narrow antique bed of Gert’s bedroom. The clock was blinking, so I knew the power had come back on. I looked up, startled by my own reflection in the antique mirror above the dresser.
Not a pretty sight, I can tell you that. Why was it that, no matter what the situation—and great sex the night before was one of the better situations I could think of—I still looked like death warmed over when I woke up? “Kel?”
No answer.
I slid out of the bed and realized I was naked. There was a towel on the floor, the one that had been on my head. I wrapped it around me and lifted a hand to my hair. Since I’d slept on it wet, I now resembled Little Richard. Perfect.
“Kel?”
The no-answer thing was sending little tendrils of panic down my spine because Kellan was a morning person, and always had been.
I ran to the bedroom doorway. The blanket was still on the floor, but there was no Kel.
He wasn’t in the tiny postage stamp of a kitchen either. Feeling a bit like Alice falling down the rabbit hole, I hauled open the front door to yell for him, but that turned out to be unnecessary.
He stood on the bottom step, shoulder propping up the post, sipping at a mug, watching the sun rise over the line of trees. I caught him in profile, disgustingly alert and clear-eyed. His hair curled over his ears, past the nape of his neck. He wore a ragged old T-shirt and sweatpants that hung temptingly low on his hips, the drawstring barely knotted. Beneath those sweats, his body was hard and perfect, and after last night, I knew just how hard parts of him could be, and also exactly how perfect.
The rest of him was pretty damn fantastic as well.
So ridiculously relieved to see him, I went running out the door, ignoring that it slammed behind me as I leaped down the steps. I executed a little twirl to face him, relieved beyond belief. “We’re even now, because you just shaved ten years off my life,” I announced, then shivered in the chilly morning air. “Guess that sexual healing thing is dead on, huh?”
He didn’t answer.
Oh boy. Awkward-morning-after alert. “I sure could use some caffeine.”
He looked at my hair. “You need more than caffeine.”
“Okay, so I need a brush, too.”
“You really think that’s going to help?”
“Funny.” It wasn’t fair that I looked like something that needed to be dragged to the curb, and he looked mouth-watering. He smelled good, too, damn it. But I shoved back the lust attack and got a grip. I adjusted my towel, and wished for clean clothes. Clean, warm clothes.
The morning was chilly enough to remind me that I wore nothing but a towel. In the light of day, the woods seemed just as close and impenetrable as they had last night, but a little less scary, thankfully.
Kellan didn’t move, just stood there in the bright morning sun, his gaze on the towel that I was adjusting.
Or, more specifically, on me in the towel.
I was more than a little chilled in the sharp air, but at the heat that flared in his gaze, I once again began to warm up nicely. Odd that this strange, almost chemical-like attraction I had going for him hadn’t resolved itself overnight. Odd and new. I had no idea whether it was the Alaskan air or the fact that, hello, he was damn fine to look at. Or maybe more than just my eyes had gone whacko out here in this high-altitude air. But all I could think was, Was he up for round two?
“You okay?” I asked.
“That was going to be my question to you.” Setting his mug on the railing, he put his hands on my arms and rubbed them slowly up and down.
Mmm, now see, there was a nice way to assuage the morning-after awkwardness.
“Where are your clothes?” he asked.
“I forgot to put them on.”
His mouth quirked. “My lucky day.”
There he was, the funny, easygoing Kellan I knew. The men in my life tended to fall into two categories: those who sneaked out by dawn’s light and those who wanted one more round before sneaking out.
Unfortunately for Kellan, there was nowhere to sneak to. For either of us.
Which left us in this awkward territory. We’d slept together. Actually, there’d been no real sleeping involved, and just thinking about it made me need to fan my face again. I shivered.
Mistaking the movement for a chill, he turned us toward the guest house and leaned past me to open the door.
It was locked.
“Kel,” I said, fascinated by the muscles rippling across his shoulders and back. “Um, about last night.”
“Huh,” he said to the locked door, and tried again.
“Kel?”
He grunted, fiddling with the handle.
“I, um, hope it’s not going to be awkward,” I said. “Because that would be awful, you know?”
Ignoring me entirely, he tried the window, which was also locked.
“Stay here,” he said. “I’ll go to the inn and get a key.”
“Right.” I nodded agreeably. “I’ll just stand here by myself, bear bait, in only a towel.”
He looked me over. “I’ll hurry.”
“Y
ou never hurry.”
He actually smiled. “I will this time.”
I crossed my arms and blocked his path. “Last night. I want to talk about last night.”
He made a face, like I’d made him taste bad medicine. Or Marilee’s sauce. “Do we have to?”
This was new. Me being the one to want to talk. “Yes!”
He sighed. “Okay. Go ahead.”
“All right.” I looked at him, thrown unexpectedly off balance. “I don’t want it to stand in the way of our friendship.”
“Our one-night stand, you mean?”
“Yes.”
He turned away from me and headed down the stairs. “No worries, Rach.”
No? So why was I suddenly worrying even more? “Kel?”
“I’ll be right back.”
“But…” I bit my lip, trying hard not to say, “Please don’t leave me out here.”
Still, it must have been all over my face, because he sighed again and, coming back, pulled his T-shirt off over his head. Handing it to me, he said, “Here.”
I scrambled into it gratefully, my body absorbing his heat, his scent, as the material fell to my mid-thigh. I nearly pressed the material to my face for more of his delicious scent, but I managed to control myself. “What about your sweats?”
“Keeping those on,” he said.
“You’re no fun.”
“Wait here.”
With that, he jogged off the steps and toward the B and B. Which was how I ended up standing there for the longest five minutes of my life.
I know it was five minutes because I counted.
At thirty, a bird squawked so loudly I nearly screamed.
At fifty-five, a squirrel dashed in front of me, chattering, nearly putting me into heart failure.
I got to three hundred twenty before Kellan showed back up. “What took so long?” I demanded, for once unimpressed by his half-naked state.
He held out his empty hands, perplexed and irritated, a rare look for him. “The inn’s locked, too, which is weird, because I was just there.”
“Locked?”
“Yeah.”
“I thought Marilee gave you coffee.”
“Axel did. He told me Marilee’s coffee would burn a hole through my esophagus, and that his was far better, but I wasn’t to tell her.”
“What about the guns? Did you ask about the guns?”
“Gert never let anyone in her place, right?”
“Right.”
“So telling them about the guns she kept there seemed unwise.” He glanced back at Hideaway. “But why is the place locked up tighter than a drum, with no signs of life?”
Feeling very naked, I wrapped my arms around myself. “So I guess it’s true then.”
“What?”
“I’m really in the Twilight Zone. Without underwear. It’s like every bad nightmare I’ve ever had.”
Chapter 9
L ocked out. I put my forehead to the front window, caressed at every movement by Kellan’s shirt. “Kel? Remember that time in college when we played Truth or Dare?”
He moved behind me, rattling the front-door handle. “No.”
“Yes, you do. Dot and I dared you to strip naked and run around the perimeter of the house, and you did, and then we locked you out. Remember now?”
He sighed. “Trying hard not to.”
“You banged on the door, bare-ass naked, and then we flipped on the porch light, and all the neighbors came out. Someone took pics, and they ended up on the bulletin board in the coffee shop.”
“I remember,” he said tightly, rattling the window. “Is there a caboose to this story?”
“I was just going to say that suddenly I know how you felt.”
“Are you butt-ass naked? With laughter ringing in your ears and light bulbs flicking on?” He peered in the window. “No, you are not.”
I grinned.
“Yeah, you did that then, too,” he said, and shook his head.
“Not at you. I didn’t laugh at you.”
“Oh yeah, you did.”
“Okay, I did.” I laughed now, too. I couldn’t help it. He was pretty adorable over there, pouting.
“Damn,” he said softly, his gaze holding mine.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
But it had been something, and I had a feeling, given that he was watching my mouth, that it had to do with my smile. But before I could say anything, he turned away, again rattling the door handle.
Still locked.
“I’m going to break it.”
“You can’t break a door handle,” I said. “You’d have to be Superman.” I had my eyes closed again, my forehead to the window. I was pretending I was on a cruise to…somewhere warm, maybe the Bahamas. Yeah, that worked. With a hot sun and cute waiters carrying trays of goodies like—like Girl Scout Cookies.
At the sudden sound of wood cracking, I lifted my head.
And then gasped.
Kellan stood there holding the doorknob in his hand, staring at the hole he’d left in the door, looking a little unnerved.
“My God,” I whispered. “How did you—”
“Don’t know.”
“Are you—” His hand was bleeding. “Kellan, are you all right?”
“Fine,” he said tersely, and pushing open the door, he gestured me in.
“Your hand—”
“Just a scratch.”
“The door—”
“Rach, just get inside.”
I crossed the threshold and went directly to the six-pack of water on the coffee table before remembering that I hadn’t been able to open one the night before.
Kellan reached past me, tore the first water out and opened it without any effort at all. He handed it to me, looking a little bit sweaty and a whole lot tough.
Wow. He really had it going on. I still didn’t get how I’d never noticed before.
Oh boy. Was I slow, or what?
In the guise of giving myself a minute, I drank half the bottle, then swiped my mouth and stared at him. “You were hit, too,” I said with remarkable calm, given that my heart had just bounced off my other internal organs with the impact of a freight train. “We were both hit, and we were both changed.”
He opened his mouth, but at that exact moment, Marilee—tall and lush and darkly gorgeous in black jeans and boots, and a black beaded leather jacket—appeared in the doorway.
“Morning,” she said, and held out a steaming mug for me, not even blinking at the fact that I wore nothing but Kel’s T-shirt and a towel.
Or that there was a brand-new hole in the door of her dead employer’s private quarters.
She didn’t acknowledge any of that because her eyes had locked on Kellan. Specifically, on the fact that his loose sweats hung low on his hips, and that he wore nothing else on his fabulous, mouth-watering body. She let out a slow smile as she leaned with easy negligence against the jamb, acting like sex on a platter, when only yesterday she’d completely ignored him.
Prelightning.
Presexual healing.
This made me mad, and it had little to do with the green-eyed monster.
Okay, it had everything to do with jealousy.
Marilee put her hands on her hips and thrust out her perfect breasts a little, demanding all eyes on her.
I would have liked to compete with that, but I was also still stunned over the realization that Kellan had been hiding a little secret.
A big secret.
“Where were you just now?” Kellan asked Marilee, and if I hadn’t been so blindsided by his secret, I’d have fallen a little in love with him on the spot for not noticing Marilee eating him up. “The B&B was locked, and you didn’t answer the door.”
“I was busy,” she said with apology but no excuse.
“We got locked out,” he said.
“And the windows were locked, too,” I said. “So he had to—”
Kellan shook his head at me. He didn’t want me to mention the
breaking-the-door thing. But if she so much as looked, surely she’d see the gaping hole.
“They were painted shut,” Marilee said, not taking her eyes off him. “Don’t feel bad. No human could have opened one.”
I wrapped my chilled fingers around the steaming mug she’d handed me and considered different ways to get her to stop drooling. Strangling her seemed like a good option.
Apparently not much of a mind reader, Marilee moved toward Kellan and the couch, as if yesterday had never happened.
But no one messed with Kellan’s head. Well, no one but me, damn it. Secrets or not, hot or not, Kellan was mine. I put down the mug. According to Axel, I wouldn’t want to drink it anyway.
Before I could step between the two of them, Marilee put her hands on Kel’s shoulders and rubbed. “Oooh, you’re tense. We have some massage therapy appointments open today, if you’d like one.”
And that green-eyed monster bit me hard. The bitch! Those were my shoulders to touch, not hers. “Okay,” I said grimly, giving Kellan a dirty look. Damn men. They were such stupid, easy creatures, led around by a single appendage, which didn’t even have the capacity to think for itself. Honestly, it was a miracle they managed to function on a daily basis. “Thanks for the coffee, but I really have to talk to Kellan now. Privately.” I added a smile that could be called such only because I bared my teeth.
Marilee shot me a measuring look, which I returned, probably with some fire added, and she lifted her hands in a little gesture of surrender.
She moved toward the door, making sure to brush against Kel as she did, even stopping to practically purr, just before she pulled out her ace card, which was to stagger slightly, then put her hand to her head, letting out a quivery little sigh and saying, “Oh dear.”
Kellan put his hand on her arm. “What? Are you okay?”
“Yes. Yes, of course…” But she wavered unsteadily, then fell right against him so that he had no choice but to catch her as her legs buckled. Her eyes rolled up, lashes fluttering, as she began to faint.
What a pathetic, novice move, I thought. Kellan could see right through that fake faint.
But no, his face had gone all tight with concern and worry, and he’d caught her up in his arms. Clueless!