by Hope Ford
I shake my head. “No. Definitely not. This pussy is mine now, Ginger.”
She laughs then, which is the last thing I expect from her. “You do know you didn’t want anything to do with me earlier. Now you’re claiming my uh, private parts? Why do you want that”—she gestures between her legs—“but you don’t want me?”
I put my hand to the side of her face. “No, all of you. You’re all mine.”
She blinks and then smiles. “Okay.”
I smile back at her. “Okay.”
She raises up and slides her hand on my leg. “So it’s your turn, right? That’s how it works.”
I grab on to her hand, stopping her. “Usually. But not tonight.”
Her lower lip comes out in a pout. “Not tonight. Why not?”
I kiss her, and before it gets hot and heavy, I pull away. “Because you’ve been drinking. We’re not doing that when you’ve been drinking.”
She seems to weigh my words. “So I hardly drink first of all, but what you’re saying is that if I’m sober tomorrow, you’re going to take my virginity, right?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. There’s things we need to talk about first.”
She yawns, and I know I need to go or else I’m going to try to stay the night and hold her until morning. I need to put some space between us before I make any rash decisions. “I have to go.”
She doesn’t move off my lap. “You can leave if you promise that you’ll come see me tomorrow.”
She must sense that I’m already having second thoughts. Ginger is sweet, too sweet for the likes of me. But if nothing else, I can promise to come see her. “I promise.”
She lets me up then and walks me to the door. I kiss her fast on the lips and then jog off the porch and to my car. I wave at her as I try to figure out what I’m going to do next.
8
Ginger
I wake up the next morning, stretching with a smile already on my face. Instead of hungover, I feel like I could go outside and run a mile up and down the farm’s driveway.
I shower and get ready for work and meet Honey at the produce stand.
“What are you smiling about? Or do I want to know?” she asks. “I’m sure it has something to do with Ozzie’s car parked outside your house last night.”
I just smirk at her. “Do I ask you about David’s motorcycle at your house at all hours of the night? No, I don’t.”
She blushes. “Fine.”
The morning goes by, and I don’t know how many times I almost call the Cherry Bomb. I want to talk to Ozzie. I want to talk to him about last night. Even though thinking about it right now, I’m a little embarrassed, I still have a deep longing to talk to him about it. I remember the promise I made him give me. He said he was going to come and see me today, so I keep reminding myself that I’ll see him at some point.
All I can do is hope it’s soon because after last night and what I let him do, I just need some idea of what he’s thinking.
Ozzie
Standing in the almost empty room, with only a desk and two chairs, I can feel the walls coming in on me. I’m here. Finally. I should have come to see my brother years ago, but it’s only now that I’m making myself do it. I can’t even imagine seeing my little brother, the boy that I’ve looked out for most of my life in an orange jumpsuit and inside these sterile walls, but it’s way past time.
The door opens noisily, and my brother and an officer walk into the room. “You’ve got ten minutes.”
My brother looks nothing like I remember. It’s been almost six years since I’ve seen him. He never came to see me the three years I was on the inside, and it’s been almost three that he’s been in here. “Hey, Kyle.”
We are standing tensely across from each other, neither one of us wanting to make the first move. “Hey, big brother,” he says.
I almost wince because his words only remind me that I haven’t been much of a big brother to him, not lately.
“How’s Mom?” he asks.
He takes a seat in a chair, and I walk around to sit across from him. I can’t get over how much he’s aged. The fine lines on his face and the cold look in his eyes almost makes me shiver. He’s definitely not the same kid that I used to ride bikes with up and down the neighborhood.
“She’s good. She misses you.”
He grunts. “Yeah, she misses me. The last time she was here, she said she was glad I was in here.”
I shrug my shoulders. “I can’t say I blame her. She said that when I was in jail you were on drugs really bad. She didn’t know what to do for you. She’s afraid if you were still on the outside you would’ve been dead by now, so yeah, I’d say she is happy you’re in here.”
“Can you just be my brother? For once in your life, can you quit trying to teach me something or reprimand me for whatever? Just be my brother.”
There’s so much anger in his voice. I know he blames me for a lot of his life. And I probably am at fault for a lot of things, but not for the reasons he thinks. “Anyway, I needed to come and apologize.”
His eyes finally meet mine. “Sorry, for what? For not coming to see me? Hell, Oz, if I just got out of prison, I wouldn’t want to come and see you behind bars either. You don’t have to apologize, I’m not mad about it.”
But I shake my head. “I’m not sorry for that. I had a lot to deal with. I’ve had a lot of guilt for things, but I have to learn to deal with it. The first thing I want to do is to apologize to you for taking the rap for that drug deal.”
He looks confused. “I don’t understand. What do you mean?”
“I mean, if I’d let you take the fall for it, let you be responsible for your life for once, then maybe you would have learned your lesson. Maybe you wouldn’t have spent the next three years looking for your next fix. You could have gotten your life on track. Instead, I took that from you. I took the blame, and you got yourself into worse trouble. I spent most of my life taking care of you, doing things for you, and that’s probably the worst thing I could have done.”
He stares at me for the longest time, and I wait for him to get up and leave. I know that’s not the apology he was expecting, but I know it’s the one I needed to give. Who knows if his life would have turned around if he had been held responsible for his past mistake? We’ll never know.
He leans forward on the table. “I get you, man. I know what you’re saying. It wasn’t your fault. I know you did it because you love me. I wish I could say I’d do the same for you, but I’m not a good man like you are, Oz.”
I interrupt him. He may have gotten off track, but he’s still a good man. “You are too.”
He shrugs. “We can agree to disagree. But I get what you’re saying. Ma’s worked hard with the attorney. They’re trying to get me out on parole. Part of that is rehab.” He shakes his head. “I haven’t touched dope in three years, but I still am going to rehab when I get out. I’m going to do right, Ozzie. I promise I will.”
I want to trust him so much, but I just don’t know if I can. All I know is I can be here for him, and if he falls again, I’m just going to have to let him pick up the pieces this time. But I know I’ll still be right beside him.
We talk about the pawn shop, the liquor store, and the tattoo shop. I tell him I’m going to start looking for a house, and he talks about using the library and the gym. Our ten minutes have gone by, but the officer still hasn’t come to collect him, so we continue to talk.
“So are you seeing anyone?” he asks me.
I want to tell him about Ginger, but a part of me feels like she’s too innocent to even mention here. “Not really.”
He laughs. “That sounds like a yes, brother.”
“We’re ex-cons, Kyle. There’s no woman crazy enough to deal with that.” But even as I say it, I’m thinking about Ginger and how she doesn’t seem to care about my past. At least what she knows of it.
“Don’t throw your life away because of me, Oz. You think you have guilt and need to apologize? What about m
e? I’m ate up with it. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about what you did for me.”
I interrupt him. “You didn’t ask me to.”
He shakes his head. “No, but I didn’t stop you either. But my point is, don’t throw your life away. You may have the title of an ex-con, but both of us know that doesn’t define you. That’s not who you are. You’re a man that loved your little brother, that’s it. And some woman will see that and be all right with it.”
I’m quiet for so long he slaps his hand on the table. “What’s her name?”
I let out a deep breath. “Ginger.”
The door opens behind Kyle, and the officer steps in to collect him. He stands up, and I can’t resist any longer. I pull my brother into my arms and hold him tight. “I love you, little brother.”
He laughs and slaps me on the back. His voice is deep and filled with emotion. “I love you too, big brother.”
He gets to the door and turns around. “I know you don’t want to bring her here, but when I get out, I’d like to meet this Ginger.”
He walks out, and I tell him truthfully, “I’d like you to meet her.”
9
Ozzie
I drive straight from Syn City to the Ranchlands and don’t stop until I pull into the parking lot of Ginger’s produce stand. She’s there helping a customer, and she waves when she sees me. I stand off to the side and wait as the man she’s helping flirts with her. Ginger laughs but doesn’t flirt back. She’s bubbly and smiling, and most likely the man is taking it as flirting, but it’s not. She actually is very nice to him but deflects any attention he gives her.
When he finally leaves, I walk up to her. “How many times do you get hit on in a day?” I ask her.
I wasn’t expecting that to be the first thing out of my mouth, but it is what it is. Ginger tenses as she looks at me. “I don’t know.”
I walk around her makeshift counter and corner her against a table full of vegetables. I grab the hair that’s hanging over her shoulder and twirl the curl around my finger. “Once a day, five times a day, what is it?”
She’s staring up at my mouth. “Yeah, something like that.”
I shake my head and put my hand at the base of her neck. “Fuck, you need a full-time protector.”
Her hands go to my waist. “Are you wanting the job?”
I can’t take my eyes off her. “Yeah, I think I do.”
Her smile is almost heart-stopping. “I’d like that.”
“Go out with me tonight,” I say to her in a demanding tone.
She’s shaking her head, and I wait for her to tell me she’s going dancing or her ex is coming over or something like that. Already, I’m wanting to claim her as mine.
“I’m about to close. If you will help me, we can go from here.”
I breathe easier. “So, yeah, you’ll go out with me?”
She wraps her arms around my waist. “Yeah, only you.”
I take a deep breath. It’s going to be easier saying this without her looking at me. “There’s things you need to know about me. I don’t know what all you know, but I was in prison...”
She interrupts me and rests her chin on my chest to look up at me. “I know. Your mom told me everything, and I’m still here. I still want you, Ozzie.”
“I went and saw my brother today.” I don’t know why I tell her, but I feel it’s important. Finally, after what seems like forever, I’m able to let go of some of the guilt. Now I just have to work on feeling that I’m worthy of Ginger. I’ll do whatever I have to in order to prove I am, though.
She looks concerned. “How is he?”
I tighten my arms on her. “He’s good. He’s got plans for getting out and getting his life together. We worked out a few things. He wants to meet you.”
She looks surprised. “You told him about me?”
I nod, and her smile deepens. “I’ll go meet him anytime you want me to.”
But already, I’m shaking my head. “No, not there. When he gets out, I’d like you to meet him.”
“Is he getting out soon?”
I look at her closely. “A few years actually.”
Her hands slide up my chest. “And you want me to meet him then. When he gets out?”
“Well, I’m hoping you’re not sick of me then because yeah, I want you to meet him when he gets out.”
Her hands wrap around my neck, pulling me down to her. “It sounds good to me.”
We kiss, and when someone drives by, blowing their horn, I pull away. “C’mon, I’ll help you close up shop and then we can go out.”
She nods and starts giving me jobs to do. We finish putting things away, covering and tarping the tables we don’t move, and when we’re done, she grabs my hand, and we walk toward my car. “Where do you want to go?”
She fidgets her hands in her lap. “Well, if you don’t mind, I’d love to go home and change clothes first.”
I want to tell her she looks perfect, but I nod and let her in. “Do you walk here in the mornings?”
She nods. “Yeah, it’s a little less than a mile, and it forces me to get exercise.”
We make small talk, but the closer we get to her house, the quieter she gets. “Do you want me to stay out here while you get ready?”
“No! I mean, no, come on in.”
She’s acting odd. Maybe it’s because it’s our first date, but I know it’s something more than that. She’s up to something, but I decide to play along.
She hustles me into the house and leaves me standing in the living room. “I’ll be right back.”
I tell her to take her time, and I walk around the living room, looking at all the pictures and knick-knacks she has sitting out. “Ozzie!” I hear her call from the other room.
Without thought, I follow the door that she went through. “Yeah,” I say and then stop, speechless with my mouth hanging open at her bedroom door.
Ginger is standing beside her bed naked. She doesn’t have a stitch of clothing on, and all I can do is stare.
I don’t know how much time goes by, but I take in her big, rounded breasts, soft stomach, and curvy thighs. I stare for so long she starts to get self-conscious, and she pulls her arms up to try and cover her body.
I’m across the room in an instant, grabbing on to her arms. “No, don’t hide from me,” I tell her huskily. “You’re beautiful, Ginger.”
She tilts her head up. “I want you, Ozzie. I want this with you.”
“Are you sure?” I have to ask.
“I’m more than sure.”
She thinks she knows what she’s getting herself into, but I still feel the need to break it down for her. “Fuck, baby, after last night I knew I had to have you. I’m fucked up. I have a fucked-up family, and everything about you is pure and beautiful. I want to save you from me, but I’m so fuckin’ weak. I can’t walk away from you.”
She shrugs her shoulders. “Then don’t. I don’t care how fu—messed up it all is, I want to be with you, Ozzie.”
My jaw tightens. “You’ve sealed your fate. You’re mine, and I’m a controlling fuck. I won’t just stand by as other men try to flirt with you and imagine themselves with you. None of that is okay now. Once you’re mine, that’s it. It’s only you and me.”
She nods. “Okay, yes, yes, I’m yours. Please, I’m dying here, Ozzie.”
I push her onto the bed, and she falls back with a squeal. I’m breathing hard already and haven’t done a thing. I pull off my clothes faster than I ever have in my life and lie down on top of her. Her legs open and wrap around my waist. My cock is hard between us, and my balls are already drawing up, ready for a release.
“It’s going to be quick, but I promise I’ll make you feel good.”
She nods, her eyes like saucers again. I know this is her first time, and I’m determined to make it good for her, even though I’m about ready to bust. “Fuck.” I get up and grab my jeans and pull out the condom in my wallet. Thank goodness I had the forethought to buy a box last nigh
t on the way home.
I look at her, and her legs are still open wide. I lick my lips as I toss the condom onto the bed. I dive between her legs, my tongue stroking through her core, and she raises her hips to meet me. I concentrate on her swollen clit, circling it with my tongue. She’s moaning, her hands wrapped in my hair as she gyrates her hips. “Yes,” she moans.
I smile against her and bring her to the edge, back off, and then bring her to the edge again until she’s going crazy and almost begging for a release. I pull off her. “You’re close, aren’t you?”
She nods, her eyes dazed.
I grab the condom, unwrap it, and pull it over my hard, leaking cock. I position myself between her legs. “I need you to come while I’m inside you.”
Her hands are caressing her breasts, and I lean up, taking a plump nipple into my mouth. I suck, and she moans. She’s so expressive, and it only build fire to the depths of my heart.
“I need it quick, Oz.”
“I know, baby,” I tell her and thank fuck she wants it quick, because I’m not going to last.
Ginger
He enters me slowly, and I completely forget to breathe. He’s so big, but I’m not worried he’ll hurt me. I know he won’t.
He gets a little inside me and stops. His face is pulled tight, and there are beads of sweat on his upper lip. He’s trying his best to control himself, but that’s not what I want. I want him free and loose. I want him just as excited as I am.
He slides in a little farther, and I can’t stop the expletive from leaving my mouth. “Fuckkkkk.”
He stops, and it’s then I realize he thinks I’m in pain when in fact, I’m anything but. I want this, but he’s trying not to hurt me.
I put my feet on the bed and look at him. His eyes are on my face, no doubt looking for any indication I’m in pain. “I need you to fuck me, Ozzie. Take me and make me yours.”
He slides in a little more, and he’s right against the tiny piece of skin that separates us. We both freeze, and instinctively, I tighten my cunt on him.