Everytime a Knot Is Undone, a God Is Released

Home > Other > Everytime a Knot Is Undone, a God Is Released > Page 15
Everytime a Knot Is Undone, a God Is Released Page 15

by Barbara Chase-Riboud


  Garrison, airport, press club

  Possible,

  A Michelin Guide to

  War,

  Revolution,

  Famine,

  Danger,

  Death,

  Distance.

  I should have burned them

  All

  Long ago

  So that their spirits rejoin

  Time.

  II

  I remember the first:

  Leopoldville;

  Lumumba lived.

  It came and I didn’t recognize

  The hand.

  Could it be that

  Once

  I didn’t recognize that

  Wide and sprawling down/beat

  Hand,

  Full of violent, elegant

  Strokes,

  Filling page after page with

  No margins

  Then, written

  Between the

  Lines.

  Leopoldville;

  Lumumba lived.

  Your hand

  That scattered my life like

  Scrabble tiles,

  Rewording it in your own language,

  Intricate,

  Demanding,

  Fascinating and

  Without parallel.

  Leopoldville;

  Lumumba lived.

  I know.

  You have him like some

  Wild animal trophy

  In your files.

  What else came with you and those letters from

  Leopoldville?

  The scent of Africa?

  The continent that belongs to me?

  Perhaps I should have

  Burned that first letter and

  Let my ancestors whisper to me from its ashes,

  Blow the dark breath of Africa in my ear,

  Tell me stories I’ve never heard.

  Leopoldville;

  Lumumba lived.

  III

  Letters answered/Letters

  Letters followed/Letters

  Please forward,

  Hold for arrival

  If undelivered,

  Please

  Return

  To

  Sender.

  You trailed paper like a bride,

  And I collected it like a street sweeper,

  Gathering all the scraps

  Into neat little stacks,

  Sorting postmarks like Morse Code:

  Cable me;

  It is so hot here;

  Shower four times a day;

  Traveled by jeep;

  Bush country;

  Traveled by plane;

  Mountain rebels;

  Traveled by helicopter;

  Tired,

  Traveled by junk;

  Sick,

  Traveled on foot;

  Lost

  The ambassador in Delhi,

  The AFP correspondent in Saigon,

  And guess what …

  The weather;

  The Prime Minister;

  Miss you;

  Good dinner;

  Fantastically beautiful;

  Some crossfire;

  If only—

  Ruined film;

  Burned-out village—Wish

  You were

  Here;

  Torture;

  Air freight;

  Come.

  IV

  I came,

  Timidly at first

  Like a child entering a room full of adults,

  Becoming bolder and bolder as

  More and more

  Sweets were offered.

  I flew on fed

  Names I had only dreamed now

  Falling easily from my lips,

  Arrogantly

  With body posture

  Like jive talk

  In Harlem,

  Kaschmir and Khartum,

  Algiers, Odessa, Aswan, Andorra,

  Alexandria, New Delhi,

  Darling

  Delphi, Istanbul, Parma, Phnom Penh,

  Addis Ababa, Katmandu,

  Luxor, Moscow, Nairobi, Conakry, Hsilinhaote,

  Hold

  Hanoi,

  Acapulco,

  Angkor Vat, Caledonia, Calcutta,

  Marseilles, Suez, Shanghai,

  Positano, Valparaiso,

  Spoleto, Siena, Sian,

  Dakar, Abidjan, Milan,

  My

  Marrakech, Mozambique, Chenonceaux,

  Dar Es Salaam, Leningrad, Houston,

  Hand

  Houhehote, Venice, Karnak,

  Peking.

  I stuffed myself,

  A child bride on her

  Wedding day,

  Fingers henna-dipped,

  Eyes black-rimmed and avid,

  Bejeweled and still

  Invisible

  To her

  Husband.

  V

  Husband,

  Will there be

  A

  Last

  Letter?

  You

  &

  I?

  You will let me know?

  (Of course)

  You will let me know?

  (Of course)

  Pick a beautiful place

  (There are so many)

  To

  Let

  Me

  Go.

  I’ve traveled

  So far with you

  Trailed years after me

  Like baggage tags strewn by lonely winds.

  Pick some oasis in the Sahara

  Azaona, for example,

  Or the foot of the pyramid at Thebes

  (Did I really meet you there?).

  How

  Im-

  Possible!

  Or choose Wadi Halfa or

  Kilimanjaro.

  Why Not? We’ve been to better places together

  And left them behind

  Without so much

  As a backward glance.

  All I know is

  I want to die on my own continent;

  I want to die in Brazzaville.

  Or pick a place that has

  No history at all.

  Pick

  Oum Chalouba. I’ll be waiting.

  The Answer

  Darling,

  Sian is in

  Heat.

  The vet was

  Very cross.

  He said I shouldn’t be

  Surprised by

  Her

  Heats,

  And

  I should have had

  Shots given to her

  Every six months.

  He said

  It was too late to do

  Anything,

  And

  I was to give her

  Sugar lumps with

  Tranquilizers in them

  And put

  Eau de Cologne

  On her

  Bottom.

  Tranquilized

  Sugar lumps,

  And

  Eau de Cologne:

  Man’s

  Answer

  To

  Women’s

  Heats.

  Performance

  I

  Let’s start from the End, not the Beginning,

  From the final curtain, not the overture,

  The Brass and Cymbals reverberate in climax

  The roll of drums marks the chorus procession

  And flutes and woodwinds accompany us

  II

  However the conductor directed, we had a good time,

  Our laughter and joie de vivre stole the show

  Our performance enchanted the dazzled audience

  Which was surprised to learn the concert had to end

  Since our duet had always been held up as an example

  III

  But all music arrives at the last beat one day,

  Scores are settled, the orchestra packs up

  Its instruments and goes home, the p
ublic files out,

  The lights dim and then are extinguished for good

  Ending the Beginning without so much as an intermission

  We Aged a Thousand Years

  We aged a thousand years

  In that one moment

  When the sound of burnt embers echoed

  Our footsteps erased by falling snow

  Laid on the brumal Chicago lakefront,

  Where fallen Cedars shook off the weight of

  Separation and there was nothing except frost

  Which shone with indifferent whiteness,

  Our mouths clutched and fused into one last chilblain kiss,

  Taking myself by the hand, I was the first to leave,

  Heading across the Canadian border

  A mile beyond the thick ribbed floe

  Quivering in the nipping crystal hoar

  Of evaporated love …

  Been There, Done That

  I

  I have seen the pyramids

  Cruised the Nile

  Traveled the Great Wall of China

  Floated in the Red Sea,

  Swam the Jordan,

  Waded in the Ganges

  II

  I have played Chopin’s 1st Etude

  Wept beneath Montreal’s Dome

  Said my prayers in Santa Sophia

  Marveled at the Sistine Chapel

  Laid a rose on Raphael’s tomb

  Tasted truffles in Bologna

  III

  I have peered into Stalin’s tomb

  Picnicked at Pompeii

  Kissed Saint Antoine’s bones

  Counted sheep in Mongolia

  Had dinner with Mao Zedong

  IV

  I have been rained on at the Great Pyramid

  Smelled the cypresses of Carthage

  Tinted silk in the dye pits of Fez

  Rode the Orient Express through Siberia

  Ate Caviar in the Caucus,

  I’ve Been There, Done That

  V

  I reached Nirvana, once,

  And made love there, once,

  Whispered your name, once,

  I have closed my eyes, taken your hand

  Drawn my last breath,

  And loved you to the end.

  Herons on the Roof

  Herons on the roof

  Of the Metropolitan Museum

  Sleeping one on one, necks entangled,

  Like warring pink serpents,

  Stark against the gray slate of the terrace,

  Set to fly over Fifth Avenue

  Against the traffic,

  Placed there in climactic peril,

  A fanatic determined to reproduce their

  Artificiality in wax rather than nature

  Madame Trussant’s museum

  A measure of time’s empiricality

  Long after the evident say

  Two or three or thirteen centuries

  Flamboyant color of angel hair coral,

  Black underarms with the wingspan

  Of a predatory Bald Eagle,

  Not a crane, nor a seagull, not a stork, nor Egret,

  Envisioned in red wax—an epiphany

  So real my head hurt

  I sat bolt upright in bed

  Thinking why Herons on the roof?

  And how was I going to get them there?

  Tropical Fish

  Tropical fish are the most practical of pets

  They eat very little and don’t mind being wet

  Not to mention their penchant for not talking at all

  And their ability to listen for hours on call

  Their flamboyant colors bring joy to the eye,

  And oxygen-less existence tranquility buys

  But what kind of internal life do they possess?

  Happiness since they’re not tormented by sex

  Yet incredibly babies do suddenly appear

  Mysteriously rebirthing year after year

  Immaculate in conception they persist just the same

  Where do they come from and who gets the blame?

  To Gloria

  Dear

  Gloria

  Steinem,

  I have

  A

  Problem.

  I

  Am

  Female

  And

  I

  Am

  Lib-

  Erated,

  But

  I would rather be

  Beau-

  Tiful

  Than

  Not.

  I

  Would rather be

  Made love to

  Than

  Not.

  I

  Would rather be

  Lover

  Than

  Friend.

  In

  Other

  Words,

  I

  Am

  A

  Backsliding,

  Man-loving,

  Crotch-gazing,

  Phallus-adoring,

  Counter-revolutionary,

  Renegade,

  Handkerchief-head,

  Sexist

  Slave

  I feel like some

  Good nigger

  Southern white folks

  Haul out to

  Prove

  Their niggers

  Are Happy

  Niggers.

  Some liver-lipped,

  Honky-loving

  Uncle Tom,

  Rolling my eyes

  (contact lenses by Horning and Colt)

  And

  Shuffling my feet

  (loafers by Gucci),

  Shaking my lips like tambourines

  (dress by Pucci),

  Knocking my knees in a Gospel jump

  (body stocking by Christian Dior),

  My carpetbag rattling

  (Louis Vuitton),

  My hands clapping

  (nails: Revlon; rings: Tiffany’s;

  watch: Piaget; gloves: Hermes),

  Rolling on the ground

  (fur rug by Jacques Kaplan),

  And shouting to high Heaven

  (gargle by Listerine),

  Teeth grinding

  (caps by Dr. Klaie),

  Hopping and sweating

  (deodorant by Vichy),

  Throwing myself around

  (perfume by Guerlain),

  In the burning bush of a

  Southern sun

  (eye-glasses by Givenchy),

  Head ticking

  (hair spray by Coty),

  A Sunday bone-crack

  (shampoo by Carita)

  Bandana

  (by Pierre Cardin)

  Waving like a witch doctor’s

  Monkey fur switch

  (got to get me one).

  Gloria,

  I

  Just

  Can’t

  Seem

  To

  Get

  The

  Hang

  Of it,

  Trembling at some

  Baritone voice,

  Gut-snapping at some

  Broad-shouldered

  Embrace,

  Swooning at some

  Sycophant’s mustached

  Kiss.

  I

  Am

  The

  Absurdity of

  Absurdities,

  A

  Backsliding,

  Man-loving,

  Crotch-gazing,

  Phallus-adoring,

  Counter-revolutionary,

  Renegade,

  Handkerchief-head,

  Sexist

  Slave.

  Gloria,

  Hold

  My

  Hand!

  How Do I Say

  How do I say

  I love you

  Without sounding trite

  Or childish or hysterical

  Or sick?

  I’ve tried telegrams and phone calls,

 
Postcards and your answering service,

  But always

  That wary and jaded eye,

  That patronizing, misanthropic mouth,

  Stops me.

  I think:

  How would that look in print?

  Can it be that

  The New York Times Review of Books

  Can come

  Between

  People?

  Elephant Dung

  I

  I remember how once you told me

  When you were ten years old

  And not yet in long pants

  An escaped circus elephant got stuck

  II

  In the doorway of your mother’s house

  At Carnival time in Viarregio;

  A fugitive from the parade seeking water

  And how your mother waved you back

  III

  From the second story balcony to retreat

  Because she couldn’t let you in nor the elephant out

  I laughed and laughed at the elephant’s predicament

  But you were serious as you explained;

  IV

  “Like horses, Elephants hate to walk backwards because

  They would have to walk in their own dung”

  The best definition of nostalgia

  I’ve ever heard of, my love.

  Lily Pond Road

  I

  On December 19th of the year 2030

  A white tailed doe and her fawn

  Entered the Poet’s Circle

  To feed off my outstretched hand as it

  Struck a sublime pose positioned on

  The fresh cut emerald sword

  II

  The diners at the white damask covered tables

  Sat transfixed in the deliquescent light,

  Forks suspended in disbelief

  By that simple act of surplusage

  As you leaned towards me and

  Our foreheads tenderly touched

  III

  “Such a handsome couple” one guest exclaimed

  “Why you still laugh at each other’s jokes”

  “How long have you been married?”

  Twenty years today I replied, ravished

  By your handsome head with its handsome

  Hair and your handsome smiling mouth

  IV

  Belonging to handsome eyes reflecting

  The same pleonasm of faith

  As the visiting doe, my lips pressed

  Your outstretched hand filled with salvation

  And safety offering no gift other than

  Three decades of wedded blissfulness.

  Atlantic City

  What about a flower for your Lady?

  Or some cotton candy for your girl?

  What about a teddy for your sweetheart,

  Or a candied apple for your pearl?

  Days of frantic beach ball and badminton

  Hula hoops along the line of sea,

  Girls uplifted on their boyfriends shoulders,

  Laughing wildly at their heedless pleas

  Love that flowed from simple Sunday pleasures,

  Smiles devoid of any kind of lie,

  Barking pups fetch looping sticks from ether,

  Mayonnaise and ketchup on French fries,

 

‹ Prev