Parrish scowls at that.
“I won’t be able to keep my hands off of Dakota for that long.”
“Parrish,” I warn, but my entire body flushes hot at his words. Can’t deny that. Having Lumen kiss me today was sort of a … like a wake-up call? It was nice to see that I’m not just a bundle of hormones. She’s a gorgeous girl—one of the prettiest I’ve ever seen—but she isn’t Parrish. Or Chasm. Or Maxx. They’re different. “We should probably get back to studying.”
“Nice subject change,” Chasm says, reaching out to ruffle up my hair. But even as he’s being a dick, there’s a tenderness in his face that makes me squirm. “We should do it in the dining room. That way, we have a valid excuse for leaving the heart pin and all our phones downstairs.”
“Shall I cook again?” X queries, but Parrish just shakes his head and sighs.
“Tess insisted on ordering in Mexican food tonight, so that’s covered.” He glances my way with a sympathetic look on his face. “She also mentioned your prom dress. As in, you don’t have one. Fair warning: she may try to take you shopping on Friday when I’m doing my make-up exam.”
Oh. Shopping with Tess. For a prom dress that I’m wearing to a dance with her son as a date. Or, well, two guys as dates … My gaze finds Maxx’s again, and my only regret is that the three of us can’t go together.
“Get your studying done,” he tells me, offering up one of those genuine, golden boy Maxx smiles that I like so much. “When you’re finished, we’ll clean and redress your wounds.”
I nod, offering a smile of my own in return, and head downstairs with Chas and Parrish to get started.
It’s already Monday, and I’m ready to collapse. I can only imagine how the rest of the week will pan out.
As the days progress, I can see that Tess is getting more and more uncomfortable with me sleeping in Parrish’s bed. Like, she was cool with it on night one. Wary on night three. By Thursday of that week, she’s visibly disturbed by it.
It hits me like a punch to the gut that night when I realize I’m going to have to start sleeping in my own bed. Alone. Without Parrish. Without Maxx. Without Chasm.
“Let’s leave our doors open,” Parrish suggests, having already adapted back to his shirtless boy uniform. His allergy to clothes spreads to the others—not that they were ever really great at it to begin with—but tonight, after I climbed out of the shower and went into Parrish’s room, all three of them were shirtless.
It was … a lot to take in. Especially since Parrish and I haven’t had a moment alone all week. Not only has Tess maintained her vigilance over her son, but we’re all tired on a bone-deep level. Emotionally, as well as physically. Mentally. Whitehall is not an easy school. I remember when I first showed up here and attended my initial day of classes, how overwhelmed I was, how sure I would fail.
Chasm’s been helping me through that all along, but most especially this week.
When the work gets too hard, or I get too frustrated, he makes me take a break. He puts a PlayStation controller in my hands—Tess has just finally given our electronics back, although it’s admittedly a blessing and a curse with Justin around—and tells me to sit. We’ll play a quick match with Parrish and Maxx, and then hit the books again.
The night before last, I fell asleep with my face on my iPad, slumped over the dining table, and woke up to Maxx carrying me up the stairs. He deposited me in bed with Parrish, and even if we didn’t have a chance for anything intimate, at least we were able to cuddle.
Not so tonight.
I stand in my doorway and Parrish stands in his, and it’s like that night all over again.
I scrub both hands over my face and drop them to my sides, looking up to see him giving me a sympathetic half-smile in response. He knows what I’m thinking about right now.
“Don’t worry: I’ve got your two other boyfriends to defend me this time. I can’t possibly be kidnapped.” I give Parrish a look, but his smile just gets bigger and cockier. “Or maybe you’re just sexually frustrated,” he whispers, leaning down toward me.
I can feel his breath on my lips, and the warmth of it makes me shiver. I cannot even believe that we’ve gone three nights without anything else happening between us. Each day, the tension rachets up even higher. Each day, I want him just a little bit more. Based on his expression now, and the way he touches and kisses me every chance he gets, I don’t doubt that the feeling’s mutual.
“I don’t want to sleep by myself,” I admit, glancing back at my room with a sense of dread in the pit of my stomach. The last of the exams were yesterday, so I should feel relieved. Grades are supposed to be posted Saturday morning, so until then, there’s nothing more I can do. I’m simultaneously relieved that it’s over, but also filled with this deep-seated fear that chills me to the bones.
What if I didn’t get the grades that Justin asked for? What then? I don’t get to see Maxine? Or … something worse?
There’s also the other carrot that Justine dangled before me: the chance to speak to my grandparents.
My psyche needs that; my heart needs that.
Parrish glances down the hall toward the cracked door of Tess’ office before moving forward and pushing me into my room. He kicks the door closed behind him and then slides his fingers into my hair, bringing his lips down to meet mine. Our mouths slant together as he sweeps his tongue against mine in a slow, lazy arc, like we have all the time in the world as opposed to none at all.
I can hear Tess coming this way already.
Did she see us on the hall cam? We weren’t doing anything, and the audio on those cameras isn’t good enough to pick up our slight whispers. More than likely, she just wants to see if I’m in my room.
I am, unfortunately, but I’m also closed in here and kissing Parrish.
“Prom night’s tomorrow,” he whispers, licking the shell of my ear and making me shiver. “And we’re going to enjoy every second of our private afterparty.”
I shove him back and turn away just in time for Tess to knock and then, without waiting for an answer, open the door.
“What are you two doing in here?” she asks, attempting to keep the question light and breezy, but failing miserably. I can see that she’s bothered by the idea of us alone in here with the door closed. Does she sense the attraction between me and Parrish? Or maybe it’s in the little tells, the way we’re always standing or sitting so close, the way we smile at each other, the furtive glances.
It must be obvious to the entire world that we’re in love.
Just as it’s obvious to Parrish how I feel about Chasm and Maxx.
“Going over my study sheet for tomorrow,” Parrish says nonchalantly, waving his right hand around in a dismissive fashion. To be fair, there is an iPad sitting on my bed. There could be a study sheet on its darkened screen. Tess looks at it and then over at me, forcing a smile onto her face.
“Are you excited to go shopping tomorrow?” she asks me, but I’m not entirely sure if I am or not. Maybe? Tess and I made some progress while Parrish was gone, but there’s always the chance she might slip back into her old ways.
“I am,” I say, making myself smile, giving myself permission to relax for a moment. Exams are over, for better or worse. And I haven’t been stripped down naked and sliced up with utility knives since Monday, lucky me. The tension at Whitehall has been thick enough to cut with a knife—hah, a pun—but there hasn’t been any movement in days.
Everyone knows Parrish is back, that he’s on campus.
I’m starting to wonder if that wasn’t why Monday’s attack was so escalated. Parrish had been found, but he wasn’t at the school. There was one, last chance to make a move.
“Good,” Tess says, her smile getting a little realer. “I’ll get you up early and we can go after we drop Parrish off. Anywhere you want this time. If you have a store in mind, I’d be happy to take you there.”
I blink in surprise, sharing a shocked look with Parrish. He smiles softly, and I can see tha
t he’s pleased at the prospect of me and Tess getting along better.
“Thanks. That sounds … pretty awesome actually.”
“We can even pick Parrish up after his exam and have lunch together as a family.” Tess reaches out to stroke a thumb down Parrish’s cheek, and he slits his eyes at her. “Me and my lost babies.” Her eyes water briefly, and she blinks back tears as I struggle not to feel cringe as fuck.
Is it wrong, what Parrish and I are doing?
At this point, I’m not even sure if I care anymore.
I love him too much to let this relationship go on a technicality.
“We might need the extra time to get ready,” Parrish offers up, trying to gently ease Tess away from the whole ‘me and my babies’ bit. He definitely doesn’t want her to think of us like siblings. “But maybe on Sunday or whatever?”
Tess’ face tightens up, and I get the feeling we’re about to hear something about good old daddy dearest.
“Justin has asked to take Dakota for the weekend. Unfortunately, until the hearing next week, I don’t have much say in the matter.” Tess eyes me, as if she’s waiting for me to bust in with stories of Justin’s abuse. I mean, I could start with the fact that he kidnapped Parrish and threatened to kill him as a reason why I might not want to go with my bio dad for a visit.
But, of course, I can’t do that and put Maxine at risk.
“Okay.” It’s the only word that I can manage to get out that doesn’t feel like a total lie. Knowledge received and accepted, for better or worse.
Tess lets out a small sigh, but then shakes her hands out, like she’s determined to make an effort here. I appreciate that, even if I’m not thrilled at being forced back into my own bed.
I wonder if Maxx couldn’t get away with sleeping in here …
But no, that’s a pipe dream. I knew these happy sleepovers couldn’t last forever, much as I wished they would.
“Alright, Parrish,” Tess says after a minute. “Off to bed.”
He gives her a scathing look that she returns with a carefully lifted eyebrow.
“You’re not going to carry this trend into summer, are you?” he asks as Tess laughs and reaches out to ruffle up his hair. He recoils from that one. “No, Mom. I can only take so much of that,” he tells her, but not unkindly. She gives an almost wistful sigh in response.
“I can still remember when you were little and always clinging to me; you couldn’t get enough. And now look at you.” She gestures at his tall, muscular form, and then frowns. “You’re practically a man.”
He most definitely is a man, I think to myself, and then flush all over. Parrish notices and smirks at me, making me wish I had another stepbrother romance novel to chuck at his head.
“A supremely gorgeous, highly desirable man, actually,” Parrish corrects, running his palm down the flat, inked planes of his bandaged chest and bare belly. Goose bumps break out across my entire body as Tess gives him a reprimanding look in response.
“Don’t be inappropriate around your sister,” she remarks, and then points back at his room. “Out. Off to bed. You wanted to do these exams, so take them seriously.”
Parrish looks at me with a pained expression that he blinks away just in time for Tess to turn back to him.
“Good night, Gamer Girl,” he says, his voice thick with reluctance. It’s almost painful when he walks away from me, and I have to wonder how the hell I’m going to survive a whole night in here by myself.
You got him back; you saved him. Justin promised to leave him alone. Worry about Maxine and about yourself, but not Parrish.
The thoughts are logical, but that doesn’t mean my heart wants to listen to any of them.
“Good night, honey,” Tess tells me, pausing awkwardly near my door, like she wants to give me a good night kiss or a hug or something, but isn’t sure how to go about doing it. “I love you, and I’m proud of you for finishing your exams.”
“Thank you.” I smile, and it isn’t entirely forced this time. When she tries, it gets a little easier. I imagine that if she keeps trying, and I keep trying, it’ll get a lot easier. “Good night.”
I offer up a little wave, waiting until they’ve disappeared into Parrish’s room, and I can hear Tess’ voice mixing with Maxx’s and Chasm’s, before I flick my lights off and climb into bed.
After a few minutes, she leaves, heading into her and Paul’s bedroom but, unfortunately, leaving the door cracked.
“You okay in there, Little Sister?” Chasm calls out cheerfully, his voice just loud enough to carry into my room.
I turn on my side, facing toward the open door and pillowing my head on my hands.
“I’m okay,” I respond, wetting my lips and wondering how much of this Tess can hear. Eh, fuck it. “But I miss you guys. I wish I was in there.”
“I wish you were in here, too,” Parrish says, his voice more strained than usual.
“You two are impossible,” Maxx adds to that, and I can tell he’s trying to be good-natured about it, but really, he’s jealous. Not only has the tension at school been escalating this week, the tension between me and Parrish, but also the tension with the other boys.
A moment passes. Another.
I hear the quiet whisper of footsteps on the floor, and then there Parrish is, looming in my doorway.
“Get up,” he says, his voice rough and low. Please don’t let Tess see this on the camera, I think, but I’m already tossing my blankets aside and climbing out of bed. Parrish takes my hand and drags me across the hall into his room, past the other boys, and into his bathroom.
I don’t quite expect that; I thought he was taking me to bed.
Well, um, I guess he is taking me to bed, but in a different way than I’d thought.
Parrish grabs me around the waist and then guides me to the floor, laying me on the plush white rug in front of the bathtub. His mouth meets mine in the dark, searing me with vibrant heat, bringing me to life in all the best ways. I never expected all of that longing and all of that worry between us to blossom into this, this frantic, wild need that obliterates all rational thought.
Tess might’ve seen us on the camera; she might be coming this way even now.
It doesn’t matter.
Parrish pulls a condom from the pocket of his pajama pants and traces the edge of it along my jaw, making me shiver.
“I can’t fucking wait for this last goddamn exam to be over,” he murmurs, and then he’s dropping down to press his mouth against mine, his warm body settling between my thighs. My hands trace down his back, smoothing over his muscles and worrying about his wounds even as he’s sliding his bandaged chest against mine. “Kiss me, Dakota. Kiss me like you’re mine and you don’t love anybody else. I don’t care if it’s a lie.”
I cling onto him, kissing him deeply, wishing with all my heart that what he’s saying was true.
It’d be a lot easier to love one boy instead of three.
“I love you, Parrish,” I promise as he yanks my pants down my legs and slides his palms over my thighs, worshipping, caressing me. The need between us is too intense to ignore; we have to have this release, even if it’s quick.
“And I love you,” he murmurs, pressing his mouth to mine even as he shoves his own pants down and fumbles to get the condom on while trying to maintain contact with my lips. “I won’t let anything or anyone come between us. That much I can promise you.”
He angles his hips to enter me, and my mind flashes with equal parts excitement and fear. What is he saying? Is he saying that he’ll be with me even if I want to keep seeing Chasm and Maxx? Or is he saying that he’ll fight them off if necessary?
I can’t decide, and there’s no time for it anyway.
Parrish slides into me, and it’s this blissful, perfect feeling of union. There’s no surer way to promise my aching soul that he’s back and that he’s not going anywhere than to feel him inside of me like this.
We move quickly and quietly in the dark, the heat of him seepin
g into me, warming up all those cold, quiet places. If either of us had thought this was going to ease the tension between us, we were wrong.
It’s amping things up.
I have a feeling this summer is about to get hot.
I snort a laugh, and Parrish goes completely still, letting out a small groan as he buries his face between my neck and shoulder.
“Don’t do that,” he murmurs as I turn my head toward him, running my tongue along the side of his face and tasting the sweetness of his skin. “Laugh like that.”
“It’s because of you,” I promise him, thrusting my hips up and causing him to let out a small growl as he hooks his fingers around my hip bone and tries to hold me in place. “I was thinking we were going to have a real hot summer.”
“First, it’s chafing nipples that you’re thinking about when we’re together. Now, it’s summer weather?” He smirks at me. I can’t see it in the shadows of the bathroom, but I can sure as hell feel it against the side of my neck. “Also, I wasn’t talking about the actual thought that brought you to laugh—I was talking about the laugh itself. It makes you squeeze tight. Too tight.”
I can’t help it; his words—and the strange desperation in them—make me laugh again. But only for a second. Because as soon as I start laughing, he lets out this deep, male groan and starts to move, pumping harder and faster. His body slicks up against mine, rubbing my clit and driving me to impossible heights.
When it starts to feel like I’m falling I cling to him, shuddering and gasping against his lips, doing my best to keep our romance a secret. To hide it. And not just from Tess, but from the other boys.
And secrets … are most certainly something I don’t need or want more of.
If we’re going to work this out, everything has to be in the open; it just has to be.
Parrish shoves my shirt up, even as I’m climaxing and squeezing around him, and then he drops his mouth to my breast, sucking my nipple and teasing it with his heated tongue. The pleasure spikes, and then I’m writhing, almost struggling against him, demanding more.
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