“Well, all right,” said Lyndz, and she climbed onto Fliss’s bed. “Come on, then, Frankie.”
I grabbed Stanley, and Rosie and Kenny sat down on the other bed to watch.
“I can’t remember what we did first,” said Lyndz. “I think I got in a few whacks at Stanley.”
“And then I landed the killer thwack,” I said. “That was the one that sent you off the bed. Ready, Fliss?”
“Ready,” Fliss called back.
Lyndz and I began whacking each other’s teddy bears again, like we’d done the first time. But it wasn’t as easy as we thought it would be to do the stunt again. The trouble was, Lyndz was watching me like a hawk, waiting for the big THWACK! So I held off for a bit, then I swung Stanley at her teddy when she wasn’t expecting it. Instead of falling spectacularly off the bed, though, Lyndz just sat down – plonk – on the duvet.
“Well, that was hilarious,” Kenny said sarcastically.
“This is more difficult than it looks, smarty-pants,” I said.
“I told you I couldn’t do it,” Lyndz wailed.
“Try again,” Fliss said.
Lyndz and I had a few more tries, but it was no good. Lyndz was just too nervous. I managed to knock her off the bed a few times, but there was nothing like the wobbling and somersaulting which had happened the first time. Lyndz was just too scared of hurting herself to try and do that again.
“This is hopeless,” I said, after the sixth attempt. “Let’s forget it.”
“Sorry,” Lyndz said, biting her lip.
“Let me and Rosie have a go.” Kenny stood up. “I bet we can do it.”
“But that’s cheating,” Lyndz said. “You didn’t do it the first time.”
“So what?” Kenny shrugged. “We want to get on the TV, don’t we?”
“Yeah, but what about me and Lyndz?” I said.
“What about me and Rosie?” Kenny challenged me.
“Well, what about Fliss?” Lyndz chimed in. “She’s stuck behind the camera.”
We all looked at each other. It was becoming very obvious that, if we were going to send a Sleepover Club video to You’ve Been Framed, we all wanted to be in it.
“So that means we’re all going to have to get into the video somehow,” said Kenny.
“What, you mean we’re all going to have a teddy fight and somersault off the bed at exactly the same time?” I asked sarcastically.
“Ha funny ha,” said Kenny. “No, we’ll do something else. Something screamingly funny, that we can all be in.”
“Except the person who’s doing the filming,” said Fliss sulkily.
We all rolled our eyes at that.
“Hang on for just one tiny little second, Felicity Sidebotham,” I said. “You said nobody was going to do any filming except you.”
“I know,” Fliss muttered. “But that was before I knew we were going to be on TV.”
“Well, someone’s got to work the camcorder,” said Kenny. “If it’s not Fliss, who’s going to do it?”
We all looked down at our feet.
“Oh, go on,” said Lyndz. “I’ll do it. I don’t mind.”
Fliss looked relieved.
“Thanks, Lyndz. Come over here, and I’ll show you how it works. It’s dead easy.”
“What are we going to do then?” Kenny said to me and Rosie, while Fliss and Lyndz were bent over the camcorder. “It’s got to be funny to get on TV.”
“They seem to like people falling over,” said Rosie.
“And stunts with pets in,” I said.
“Right,” said Kenny. “Anyone fancy balancing Fliss’s goldfish on their nose and then falling down the stairs?”
The three of us giggled.
“Whatever it is, it’s got to be good,” I said. “You’ve Been Framed must get loads of tapes.”
“We could pretend we’re sleepwalking,” Rosie suggested. “Then we could do all sorts of daft things.”
“What, four of us sleepwalking at the same time?” I said doubtfully. “I don’t think that’ll work.”
Kenny’s eyes lit up. “Wait a minute, I’ve got an excellent idea.”
“What?” Rosie and I said together.
Kenny winked at us. “You’ll have to wait and see. First I’ve got to try and persuade Fliss to let us go downstairs. There isn’t enough room to do it here.”
“No chance,” Rosie said immediately.
“You obviously haven’t seen Kenny sweet-talk anyone before,” I muttered in Rosie’s ear.
“Fliss, I’ve got a brilliant idea for our You’ve Been Framed video,” Kenny said with a beaming smile.
Fliss raised her eyebrows. “Oh?”
Kenny nodded. “Yep, it’s so brilliant, it’s sure to get on TV.”
Fliss began to look interested. “What is it?”
“Tell you in a minute,” said Kenny. “The thing is, there’s no room to do it in here. We need to go downstairs.”
Fliss looked as though Kenny had asked her to cut her arm off.
“Are you crazy?” she spluttered. “We can’t do that! What if my mum hears us?”
“She won’t,” Kenny said firmly. “Everyone’s going to be really quiet.”
“No!” Fliss hissed.
“We’ll be as quiet as mice—”
“NO!”
“Oh, well, that’s a shame.” Kenny shrugged her shoulders. “Especially as you would’ve been the star.”
Fliss’s eyes widened.
“What?”
“Oh, didn’t I say?” Kenny remarked innocently. “You were going to be the star of my idea. Still, never mind.”
Fliss frowned. “Well, I suppose we could,” she said slowly. “As long as everyone is really quiet…”
“Course we’ll be quiet!” Kenny raced eagerly over to the bedroom door. “Come on then, let’s go. Lyndz, are you sure you don’t mind not being in the video?”
“Course I don’t,” Lyndz said cheerfully. She picked up the camcorder, and put it up to her eye. “Doing the filming is just as good.”
“Come on then,” said Kenny. “Let’s go downstairs.”
“And be quiet,” Fliss added nervously.
We all tiptoed over to the door, our hearts thumping. Kenny turned the handle and pulled it open, and we all crept out one by one…
Look, we’re not far from my house now, and I’ve still got the worst bit to tell you. We’d better stop along the way, ‘cos I can’t tell you what comes next if there’s even a sniff of a parent around. Come on, let’s sit down on this wall for a while.
Now, where was I? Oh, yeah, I’d just got to the bit where we were all creeping down the stairs, one behind the other. We didn’t dare put the light on, so we were shuffling slowly along, trying not to trip over anything. I was in front, and Fliss was behind me, and then the others were behind her. I’m sort of like the Sleepover Club scout – I always get sent on ahead to sniff out the dangers. The others must think I’m dead brave. Or maybe I’m just the only one stupid enough to do it…
“Lyndz?” I heard Fliss whisper behind me. Then, “Ow! Kenny, you dweeb, you walked right into me!”
“Well, don’t just stop like that!” I heard Kenny grumbling. “I can’t see a thing in the dark.”
“I just wanted to ask Lyndz if the camcorder’s OK,” Fliss whispered.
“What?” That was Lyndz. She was at the end of the line with the camera. “I can’t hear you!”
I rolled my eyes. This was getting ridiculous. “Kenny, Fliss wants to ask Lyndz if the camcorder’s OK. Pass it on.”
Kenny turned round, and whispered.
“Rosie, Fliss wants to know if the camcorder’s OK. Pass it on.”
We all stood and waited for Rosie to whisper to Lyndz. A few seconds later an answer came back from Kenny.
“The camcorder’s fine. It’s just got a bit of a headache, that’s all.”
“Oh, very funny,” Fliss said under her breath. The rest of us began to giggle as silently as we could.
“Well, honestly, Fliss,” said Kenny. “Keep cool, can’t you? It’s only a machine, not a person.”
“Can we please get a move on?” I hissed. “If Fliss’s mum hears us, we’re history.”
We carried on shuffling down the stairs, and then we groped our way across the hall and into the living room. I counted in four shadowy figures, and then I closed the door as silently as I could. We waited, holding our breath and listening hard, but no one came. So I flipped the light switch on.
“Let me see the camcorder, Lyndz.” Straightaway Fliss rushed over and grabbed the camcorder.
“It’s fine,” said Lyndz. “Did you think I’d taken a bite out of it on the way downstairs, or something?”
“I just want to be sure,” said Fliss. You can see why we call her Fusspot.
“Your mum’s got loads of stuff, Fliss,” said Rosie. She was standing behind the sofa, looking at a china lady in a green dress, which stood on a small table.
“Don’t touch anything,” Fliss said nervously. “My mum’ll get in a real razz if anything gets broken. Some of these things cost a lot of money.”
We all looked round the living room. I think I’ve told you about it before, haven’t I? It’s like every other room in Fliss’s house, all neat and clean and cream-coloured. And there are hundreds and hundreds of ornaments everywhere, things like china ladies wearing old-fashioned costumes, toby jugs and big glass bowls. There are so many things in it, you’re almost frightened to move, in case you accidentally knock something over. Fliss is always going on about how much her mum’s stuff cost, but some of it looked pretty nasty to me, although I was too polite to say so. That china lady in the green dress that Rosie was looking at, for instance, was gross.
“Let’s get started,” said Lyndz with an enormous yawn. “I’m going to fall asleep soon if we don’t.”
“Come on then, Kenny.” I looked at her. “What’s this super-cool plan of yours to get us on You’ve Been Framed then?”
Kenny grinned.
“A Human Pyramid,” she said.
We all looked at each other.
“Excuse me?” I said. “I thought you said a Human Pyramid.”
“I did.”
“What, you mean when people stand on each other’s shoulders?” Rosie asked.
“I’ve seen that on the telly,” said Lyndz. “Only the people at the bottom were riding about on motorbikes, with the others standing on top of them.”
Fliss was looking a bit sick. “Do you think that’s going to work, Kenny?”
“Just a minute, give me a chance to explain,” Kenny said confidently. “We won’t be able to do it exactly right—”
“You’re telling me,” I remarked. “It’s going to be a pretty sad human pyramid with only four of us.”
“I know that,” Kenny said. “I suppose I was thinking more of a Human Tower.”
“A Human Tower?” Rosie repeated.
“Yep, one person’s at the bottom, and then someone climbs up and sits on their shoulders, and then someone sits on their shoulders and so on.” Kenny beamed at us. “What do you think?”
“It’ll never work,” said Lyndz.
“That’s the point,” Kenny said triumphantly. “We want it to go wrong, don’t we? Then it’ll be funny. Trust me.”
When Kenny says “Trust me”, it’s like telling someone to trust Count Dracula when he’s feeling a bit peckish. We all looked nervously at each other.
“Who’s the unlucky idiot who’s going to be at the bottom holding everyone else up?” I asked. Kenny grinned at me. “Oh no, you’re joking.”
“Well, you are the tallest, Frankie.” Kenny said cheerfully. “And the strongest.”
“Who’ll be at the very top then?” asked Lyndz.
Kenny shrugged.
“It’s got to be Fliss, who else?” She beamed at Fliss. “See, I told you you’d be the star.”
Fliss looked a bit more cheerful. “Well, I suppose we could give it a go,” she said.
Kenny looked thoughtfully up at the chandelier light fitting in the middle of the room.
“If we can get up high enough, Fliss could swing across the room like Tarzan on her mum’s chandelier.”
Now Fliss didn’t look quite so keen.
“Kenny—” she began.
“Oh, come on, Kenny,” I said. “Be serious.”
Kenny grinned. “OK, I was only joking.”
Fliss heaved a huge sigh of relief. “Are you ready with the camera, Lyndz?” she said.
Lyndz put the camera to her eye, and gave us a thumbs-up.
“Right, me first then,” Kenny jumped up onto the arm of the sofa, and grabbed my shoulders. “Bend down a bit, Frankie, and let me climb onto you.”
“Why do I always have to be the one who does all the hard bits?” I grumbled, but I crouched down and let Kenny get onto my shoulders, with her legs dangling in front. It was a bit difficult to stand up with Kenny’s dead weight on top of me but I just about managed it.
“See?” Kenny waved at the others, and began bouncing up and down on my shoulders with excitement. “I told you it’d work – woh! Stand still, Frankie!”
I was trying to stand still, but my knees kept buckling under me, and I couldn’t stop myself staggering from side to side.
“Ow!” I complained as Kenny grabbed at my hair. “I’m going to be bald soon at this rate!”
“Well, keep still, can’t you?” Kenny hissed. “If you didn’t keep moving around, I wouldn’t have to hold on. Now bend down so Rosie can get onto my back.”
I tried to bend down, but I couldn’t. My knees kept on wobbling and I was scared I was going to fall over. I could hardly hold Kenny up, and Rosie and Fliss had to get on board yet.
Fliss had now gone right off the idea. She was dancing round us, looking more and more agitated. “Stop it!” she was wailing. “You’re going to break something!”
Kenny ignored her.
“Come on, Rosie! Climb up onto my shoulders!”
My knees went before Rosie even made a move. I collapsed onto the sofa, throwing Kenny head first into a pile of cushions.
“Ouch!” Kenny complained, pulling herself upright. “What’s the matter with you lot? That would have been excellent.”
“Yeah, if I was Arnie Schwarzenegger,” I said, rubbing my aching shoulders.
“You’re crazy, Kenny,” said Rosie. “It’s too risky. We might break something.”
“Yes,” said Fliss, glaring at Kenny. “Now sit down where I can keep an eye on you.”
We all sat down meekly on the cream-coloured sofa. Lyndz yawned, which started us all off.
“I’m so tired,” Lyndz complained. “Let’s forget it and go to bed.”
“We can’t forget about being on TV!” said Fliss. “This might be the only chance we ever get.” She looked round at us, a little smile on her lips. “Actually, I’ve got an idea…”
“For You’ve Been Framed?” I said. That made us all sit up and stop yawning. “What is it?”
“It’s really funny,” said Fliss.
We all leant forward eagerly on the sofa.
“Tell us then,” said Rosie.
“Well, first I’ll have to go into the kitchen,” said Fliss.
“Are we going to do some cooking like we did at the last sleepover here then?” asked Lyndz.
“You mean when Fliss’s porridge went mad in the microwave?” I said.
“Oh, and remember Lyndz set off the smoke alarm when she was making toast,” said Kenny.
“I nearly died laughing when Kenny’s waffle mixture went walkies out of the waffle-maker,” said Rosie. That started us all laughing, even Fliss.
“Now that would have been a brilliant video to send to You’ve Been Framed!” I said. “We’d have got on TV, no problem!”
“So are we going to do some more cooking then?” Lyndz asked eagerly.
“No.” Fliss shook her head. “I’m just going into the kitchen to get so
me orange squash and biscuits.”
“Great,” said Kenny. “I’m starving.”
“What about your You’ve Been Framed idea?” Lyndz asked.
“This is my idea,” Fliss said impatiently. “I’ll get the squash and biscuits, and hand them round. Then when I get to Kenny, I’ll drop the plate and tip the biscuits all over her.”
“And?” I said.
Fliss frowned. “There’s no ‘and’,” she said. “That’s it.”
“That’s IT?” I repeated. “That’s IT?”
“It’s not very funny, Fliss,” Lyndz said. She was trying to be polite. What she really meant was that it wasn’t funny at all.
“Of course it is,” Fliss said confidently. “What do you think, Rosie?”
Rosie cleared her throat a couple of times.
“Well – um – it might be funny, I suppose…” Her voice died away
“I think it’s a great idea,” Kenny said unexpectedly. “I reckon we should give it a go.”
My mouth fell open. I couldn’t believe what I’d just heard. Fliss’s idea was rubbish, so why wasn’t Kenny saying so? What was she up to?
“Are you sure, Kenny?” Lyndz asked hesitantly.
Kenny nodded. “Yeah, I think it’ll be excellent.”
Fliss beamed at her. “Thanks, Kenny!” she said gratefully. “I’ll go and get the squash and biscuits. Lyndz, get ready with the camera.”
“We’ll be ready,” Kenny promised. “Oh, and Fliss, put some ice cubes in the orange squash, will you? I’m really hot and thirsty.”
Fliss went off to the kitchen, smiling all over her face. Rosie went to help her, and Lyndz started fiddling with the camcorder, so that left me and Kenny on our own.
“What was all that about?” I asked.
“What do you mean?” Kenny said innocently.
“All that stuff with Fliss.” I looked at Kenny closely. “You’re up to something, Laura MacKenzie.”
“Oh dear, what a suspicious mind you’ve got, Francesca Thomas.” Kenny leaned back on the sofa, and put her hands behind her head. “As if I’d be up to anything.”
I wasn’t convinced. After all, I knew Kenny. But I couldn’t see what on earth she was going to do. After all, there wasn’t a lot that could go wrong with some orange squash and a plate of biscuits, was there? I mean, not even Kenny could manage to create a disaster out of that.
Starring the Sleepover Club Page 4