by D. W. Cee
“Jake, this has been one of the most amazing dates. Lunch was a gastronomic feast. Meeting the chef owner was almost as phenomenal as lunch, and I’m really touched you figured out how much I like opera. I guess you do listen during our dates even though they’re always cut short. You are an amazing man.”
Jake had this exceptional ability to read between the lines. He picked up my nuances and facial expressions and could easily decode answers I didn’t realize I was giving. After half a date at a Mexican restaurant, was my food obsession that obvious? He correctly guessed that his brother Nick and I would be great foodie friends. It was also a wonder as to how he knew about my fascination with Carmen. Maybe it was the way I listened to Carmen in his car or maybe it was from the brief conversation we had about the video from high school. None of this information came from directly from me.
In one single date, Jake had crossed off many items high on my ‘to do’ list. After Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, there wasn’t a single girl out there who wouldn’t want to be whisked off to San Francisco on a date. Today had been a combination of the surreal and the comical as I too would be watching an opera, my favorite opera in San Francisco. Though, I had one up on Vivian Ward. I had dined at the best restaurant in the world.
Quickly, I picked out a dress and a pair of shoes and went in to one of the rooms to get ready. In the living room, Jake was already waiting for me with one more surprise in his hand.
He held out a little box - the kind a girl received when a man got down on one knee, about to propose to the woman he loved.
“I want ask you something. Please don’t be scared by the box. It’s not as serious as it looks.”
That allowed me to breathe a sigh of relief. Jake grinned at the seriousness of my face. He carefully watched me open the tiny box and intently studied my expression as I wondered what exactly I was looking at.
“Um... it’s stunning, but could you explain this ring to me?”
In my hand lay a white gold or platinum band with hundreds of pave diamonds set into the shallow depths of the band. There was no end to the shiny diamonds that encircled the ring. This was without a doubt the kind of ring women generally wore on their fourth finger as a wedding band if they were lucky enough to afford one of this magnitude.
“Okay,” he breathed out loud, “it’s not an engagement ring nor is it a wedding band as you might fear. I wanted to give you a ring that symbolized our commitment to one another... No scratch that. That didn’t come out right.” His hands shook as they reached for mine.
“Emily, we’ve dated a couple of months now and I know you’re not quite sure where we stand in the formal sense. I actually bought this ring for you after our first date. Even back then, I knew I wanted to be with you. I mean, date only you. I wanted to ask you… geez, I feel like a school boy asking a girl to be his girlfriend,” he interjected in the middle of his own explanation, “um… I would like for us to date… exclusively date. What I mean is... Will you be my girlfriend?” he finally spit out.
I started with a half smile that led to a giggle. He was unusually insecure for Jake’s standards. When I didn’t answer immediately, his lips turned into a pouty frown.
“Are you going to answer? You’re making me nervous.”
“Okay, so let me get this straight. You spent thousands of dollars to ask my permission to do what we are already doing now? Dating?”
“Um, yeah. Aren’t you the one that called our relationship ‘whatever it is that we have’?”
I cringed when he said that. Those were definitely not choice words.
“Jake. Aren’t we already exclusively dating? Have you been seeing other girls as well? Is that why it’s so hard to spend any time with you?” My lips curled into a teasing smile. Jake didn’t find me funny. Trying to give him more assurance I said, “I haven’t had a desire or need to see anyone else. I feel blessed to be with you.”
“I’m still unsure how you feel about me. I know I haven’t said much today but you must know how much I adore you. You’re trusting, yet guarded; you’re independent, yet willing to follow; and your heart’s been broken, yet you’re willing to give love another try. I love all these qualities about you. It doesn’t hurt that you’re fun, funny and beautiful as well. I wasn’t sure you felt the same way. Especially after seeing you with Max last night, I was afraid you might be reconsidering our relationship,” he confessed with some satisfaction but still much apprehension.
“Jake. I really like you and I want our relationship to grow. You’re right. After Max, I needed to guard my heart more than necessary. But I trust you and feel most secure when we’re together. You are the only man I want to be with.”
Even with my profession, Jake’s expression hardly changed so I felt compelled to continue. “I’m sorry you had to witness my first encounter with Max and his new girlfriend. Being such an awkward moment, I didn’t react the way I would have liked. It did affect me. I guess it hurt me more than I thought it would, even with you by my side. But, you and our relationship add so much joy to my life. I wasn’t lying when I said that you’re the only person who makes me feel entirely comfortable. I’m elated when we’re together and lonely when we’re apart. Will this answer do? I will wear this very expensive ring as a symbol of my commitment to our relationship. I would be honored to be your girlfriend.”
Lovingly he pulled me to him and held me. He wanted a relationship with me despite all my inadequacies. We were content being with one another. I wasn’t wrong to anticipate that this trip would bring us closer. Love, hope and joy – a generic mantra for most – took on a completely new meaning in my heart. My heart felt whole again, emancipated from Max’s chains. It was finally free to beat for someone else.
With good foresight, Jake bought a necklace to go with the ring. Knowing that I wouldn’t want to wear it on my finger, he hung it as a pendant on my neck. It was beautiful - heavy, but beautiful.
Jane was already at the restaurant waiting at the bar for us. Her build was slender and she stood at about 5 feet 7. Her hair wasn’t as dark as Jake’s but her eyes were just as blue. She and Jake shared many of the same facial features. Upon first impression, she was just as beautiful as Jake was handsome. I could imagine how stunning the five of them would look in a family portrait.
“Emily, this is my only sister, Jane.”
“Jane, this is my Emily.”
“I’m so happy to meet you, Jane. Thank you very much for all your troubles. It was unnecessary but much appreciated,” I said giving her a hug. She hugged me right back like we were old friends.
“Thrilled to do it for you. I don’t think I’ve ever seen my brother this happy. You are actually the first girlfriend he’s introduced me to since Kelley, right Jake?”
“I guess. I don’t know.”
I turned to Jake to tease him. “There were probably so many girls before me he didn’t have the energy to introduce them all to you.” Jane and I laughed. Jake pouted.
Our restaurant was located in the business district close to the Embarcadero. Nicely decorated, we sat down to another pre fixe menu. After lunch, I chose the vegetarian option but couldn’t resist the sweetbread appetizer while Jane and Jake chose a four course meal, starting with the sweetbread as well. Sipping fizzy water, Jane and I spoke endlessly about our likes and dislikes. We talked as though we were close friends catching up on old times. Jake didn’t mind that I paid no attention to him. Content just to hold my hand, he watched us converse.
“What’s it like living in New York?” I asked Jane. “I’ve always wanted to live there. Although, I think I could live up here as well.”
“Weren’t you just there over Thanksgiving?”
“Yeah, I had so much fun. It could have only been better if your brother had gone with me.” I squeezed Jake’s hand.
“New York is the most exciting city. My girlfriends and I meet at all hours of the day and there are so many restaurants and cafés bustling with people. I enjoy how busy the stree
ts are and how people bump into you on the subway. It feels like you’re living among everyone. In LA, you drive everywhere so you don’t really get to know your neighbors. In New York, your neighbors become your commuting buddies. You should come visit me. We’d have a great time.”
“I’d love that.” Next time I’d have to make sure Jake and I went together. “Jane, how old are you? Are we the same age? If you’re in your last year of law school, does that make you older? There’s a bit of a gap between you and Jake.”
“No, I’m also twenty-four. My mom says Jake is spoiled rotten because I came along so late. He was an only child for too long.”
“Who says I’m spoiled?” Jake dropped my hand and looked aghast. “Mom says you were always the competitive one trying to outdo me.”
“Oh, only everyone! Plus, I didn’t try. I did outdo you in every category,” she retorted.
“Because he was the first grandchild in the Reid family, everyone spoiled him. He loved the attention. To this day, he’s still the golden child of this family.” There was humor and slight resentment in her tone. It made me laugh.
“So Emily,” she said turning to me, “what about my brother do you like? Why would you want to date someone who can spend no more than a couple of hours with you at a time? I’m shocked he took an entire weekend off. You must be special. I didn’t think he’d ever meet anyone who could tolerate his schedule.”
“I have to agree that he is quite the workaholic. We’ve had only four dates in the last six weeks, and every single date was cut short due to work.”
“Hey, no more Jake-bashing.” Jake frowned again as he pushed his seat closer to me. “Tell Jane what you like about me,” he directed with a child-like eagerness.
“I told you he’s an attention monger.” Jane rolled her eyes.
Not having grown up with siblings, I enjoyed their banter. It was fun watching Jake and Jane argue and poke fun at one another. I’d never experienced this with anyone. Since Max only had brothers, this brother-sister relationship was an entirely new discovery.
“Tell her, Emi.”
“Let’s see. It’s not a very long list,” I answered laughing with Jane. “I’m kidding.” I quickly added before Jake disowned me as a girlfriend. “Jake has this amazing way of making me feel like I’m the only person in this world who matters to him. I feel incredibly special.” My eyes glowed as I spoke about my… boyfriend. “Not only is he attentive, he’s caring and also a very loving person. Is that a good enough answer?”
His silly grin shouted to everyone in the restaurant that he liked my answer very much. Passing the test, he leaned over and kissed me – a bit too passionately – in front of his sister. Jane had other ideas.
“Are you talking about my brother? Do you know what Kelley’s biggest complaint about him was? She always bemoaned the fact that he didn’t pay enough attention to her.”
“Now why must you bring Kelley into this story? That’s the past. Let’s leave it there,” Jake warned his sister.
“My mom says that Jake needs a woman with a strong sense of self esteem because he never pays much attention to anyone but himself. Have you two gotten into an argument yet? Has he been mad at you?”
I shook my head yes. “I don’t know if I’d call them an argument but we got into a couple of disagreements.”
“Wait till you get into an all out argument with him. I don’t know if you’re going to think he’s so attentive and caring, then. You should see the tantrum he throws.”
“I love these new revelations about you. You didn’t tell me any of this during lunch.” My eyes looked at him in delight. “I can’t wait to see you throw a tantrum. Maybe I’ll purposely make you angry just to see your reaction.”
Jane loved my goading. Jake didn’t fall into our trap.
“Don’t believe a word she says. I don’t know what’s gotten into my sister.” He turned to his sister and tried to give her a stern look. She wasn’t scared.
“So Jake, what do you like about Emily? Try to keep it to a few sentences, okay? We have an opera to watch.”
Just then, servers came with our third course. A sautéed striped bass sat in front of them while I got a medley of mushrooms.
“If I had to sum up what I love most about Emily, it would be her honesty. Even though she knows it’s not to her benefit, she’ll still tell you what’s in her heart. I know way too much about her last relationship.” He lightly shook his head.
“Was my honesty at lunch not to my benefit? Am I in trouble?” My forehead creased with a worried look.
Jake’s lips reached over to mine again and eased my concern. “I appreciate your honesty whether or not I appreciate your answers.”
Jane broke our tender moment and continued her questions and answer session and Jake happily obliged by giving her a detailed account of our first encounter.
“We met late at night at a supermarket and I had to take her to the hospital after she fell reaching for a box of cereal. So, I take her to General Hospital and we’re sitting in the examination room and do you know what she asks me? She had the gall to ask if I was really a doctor at GH and not just some staff member.”
In response to Jane’s ‘why’ look, I said, “Well, for someone who worked at the hospital, he got no special treatment. I waited there just as long as everyone else to get out of ER. In fact, there were patients who came after me but left earlier. I thought he was lying to me about being a doctor. It took us three hours.”
Jane broke into a chortle. “Yeah, he has no power there. You should have called Uncle Henry instead. You would have been in and out with a call from him.”
“By the way, why are you guys going back down tonight? Jake, didn’t you ask Emily if she wanted to stay the weekend?” I could tell Jake was happy to hear his sister ask this question. Put on the spot, I didn’t know how to answer. “Emily, you should stay with us in the apartment and go down tomorrow night. We could spend another day together. Are you uncomfortable with me being in the apartment? Do you want to be alone with Jake?”
This conversation turned even more awkward.
“Oh, no, Jane… I don’t feel uncomfortable with you. Jake didn’t fully explain what was happening today.”
“Then you’ll stay the night? We can get to know each other better.”
What could I say? “I’d love that, Jane but, I’m not prepared to spend the night here. I don’t have any clothes or toiletries.”
“You can borrow all of mine. We can also quickly stop by any of the stores in Union Square if you need to pick up something.”
“Okay.” I was really nervous about spending the night with Jake even with Jane in tow. I hadn’t explained to him about my wishes to stay chaste till marriage. Most likely, he would expect or at least desire to spend the night with me. When and how I would have this conversation stayed with me the rest of dinner as Jane and Jake picked up their unfinished thought.
“So Jake, anything else you want to tell me about Emily?”
“Let me excuse myself to the ladies’ room and you two can talk about me all you like. It’s a bit embarrassing hearing about myself.”
I walked to the ladies’ room leaving the Reid siblings to talk. Jake and Jane had given me a true taste of family, something that disappeared too early in my life. It was altogether sweet and sour, salty, and a bit bitter at times, but most of all, it had the wonderful flavor of love. This is what I’d missed out on being an only child with parents up in heaven. I was glad to have witnessed a small part of their family.
On my way back, seeing that the Reid siblings hadn’t finished their conversation, my pace slowed, allowing Jake to finish. What was overheard added another cup to my already overflowing feelings for him.
“And… I love her strength. I’ve never met any girl who is such a survivor. She’s pretty much been alone since high school, put herself through college, and then bought and created a home all by herself. She’s worked for everything she has. Nothing has been handed
to her. And yet she smiles and enjoys life. Her attitude is amazing. But, as strong as she appears, she’s terribly tenderhearted. I think this is what makes me so enamored with her. She hurts easily, cries readily, but loves deeply. She makes me want to care for her and shelter her from anything that may harm her. I’ve never felt such a strong desire to protect someone as I do for Emily.”
As I walked back to my seat, happiness swelled in my heart till it felt like a balloon about to burst. Jake had summed up Emily Logan better than I could have. As happy as I was, there was this nagging insecurity. Could such a perfect man exist in my world? I feared answering this question.
We got back to the apartment around midnight and Jane excused herself to answer a phone call. Here it was the conversation I dreaded.
“So…” Jake started very casually, “where will you be sleeping tonight?”
I cringed at the thought of having to explain myself to him. I waited for him to finish before going into my tedious explanation.
“Door number 1 is my room, door number 2 is Jane’s room, or you can sleep alone behind door number 3.” He pointed to each room with a hopeful and expectant look.
There was an awkward silence.
“Jake… I need to tell you something.” I dragged his name a bit but quickly let out the next group of words.
“Uh-oh, did I say something wrong?”
“No, I guess it’s time to confess since we’re at this juncture. Maybe I should have told you before accepting your ring. You might have had second thoughts about wanting me as your girlfriend.”
Jake looked mildly horrified. “You’re making me nervous, what’s wrong?”
This conversation wasn’t nearly as difficult to have the first time with Max at age 18 but now, I sounded so archaic telling my 30 year old boyfriend that I wanted to stay a virgin.
“Nothing is wrong. I should have told you this earlier. I want you to know that I’ve never, um...” There was no reason to be, but I was embarrassed.