His hands rest on my butt, he licks his lips. “You sure, baby? If it’s your first time...”
I shake my head. I may be inexperienced in many things... but I am not a virgin. I am a mother of three.
I love my children more than life itself and will be fiercely loyal to them until the day I die—but Luke took things from me I can never get back. And when I look at Hawk, a man I’ve known less than one hour, who holds me like he won’t let me go... it’s like he found me at the exact right moment. The moment I needed him.
“It’s not my first time,” I tell him. “But I wish it were.”
He exhales, and I think the idea of taking my virginity was a hold up for him. But then his eyes darken, the smoky gray turns nearly black.
“Did someone hurt you?” he asks.
“Before. Yes.”
His hold on me tightens protectively. “I’ll fucking kill them.”
I shake my head. “Tonight, I don’t want to think about the past... or the future. I just want to be here. With you.”
Hawk pulls me to him, wrapping his arms around me, and kissing the top of my head. I feel tears well up in my eyes and I let my face nuzzle in his chest. There is something magical happening here... I just met this man, yet he’s cradling me in his arms like he was made to take care of me. And deep in the cracks of my broken heart, I want him to.
“Let me make love to you,” he says, drawing my face back to his with the crook of his finger. “Let me make the wrongs right.”
He opens the door of the truck, and he carries me out of the cab. He lays down a blanket in the bed, and I won’t ask why he has one at the ready. It doesn’t matter... just like all the things I’m keeping back don’t matter either. Not right now. Right now, all that matters is this.
Us. Taking what is ours.
Standing in the bed of the truck, he offers me his hand. The sun has set, and in the darkness, no one can see the two of us. No one sees as he helps me up, as we stand before one another, our bodies pulsing with desire.
No one sees as he tells me to lift my arms to the sky, as he lifts the hem of my dress and pulls it over my head. My hands instinctively cover my belly. Stretch marks streak it, but in the dark, he can’t see them, so I let him move them away. I let him run his hands over my bare skin, and when he unbuckles his pants, steps out of them, and pulls his white t-shirt over his head, my hands know where they belong.
Running over the ladder of muscles on his abdomen, his skin hot and sweaty, he pulls me to him, hard. As if our exposed bodies need to be covered by one another.
He cups my face in his hand, kissing me, this time with a fierceness I hadn’t felt in the cab. As if his masculine potency has been unleashed, standing under the moon with a near-naked woman in his arms. I whimper beneath him, wanting more, wanting it all.
“Lie down, angel,” he tells me. “I need to touch you.”
I do as he asks, lying on the wool blanket, my eyes looking up at the stars. Making a wish.
I wish I may, I wish I might. Have this wish I wish tonight.
That this moment will stay in my memory for always. That it will never be taken from me. That I will always feel as I do now. Like I am enough.
“What is it?” he asks, his hands on the waistband of my panties, ready to pull them down and take all of me. “Don’t cry, baby.”
“They’re not sad tears,” I tell him, my throat dry and my chest heaving and just so utterly grateful to have a night where I feel like someone beautiful. I didn’t know how badly I needed it.
“No more tears tonight.” He leans down, his mouth inches from mine. “But I am going to have you crying out pretty damn soon.”
I laugh softly, never having been this close to a man who spoke with this level of authority.
“Promise?” I ask.
“It’s a goddamned guarantee.” Then Hawk slips off my panties, runs his hand between my thighs, and groans.
“What is it?” I ask, very aware of my body. “Is something wrong?”
“No, baby. You’re just so fucking wet.” His fingers press against me and I inhale sharply. He feels me, and groans again. Which causes me to smile. He wants this too. “I want you so badly.”
“Then take me, now,” I tell him, reaching under his boxers, feeling his hard, velvety length. My body reacts to feeling him, my core alive and sopping wet. I know his fingers are soaked as he strokes me gently, touching my folds with tender intention. “Make me cry out,” I tell him. “Erase my bad memories and give me a new one.”
“Oh, baby, I’ll give you more than one good memory tonight. I plan on giving you several.”
Chapter Six
Hawk
Her pussy is warm and ready, and my cock is fucking on fire.
“Fill me up,” she begs after my fingers have fucked her nice and slow. This angel under me is a godsend and if I believed in signs I’d say I fucking found one. I debated this decision, coming here to work at Jaxon’s request, wondering if I should have just stayed put and looked for more mechanic work—but after an hour on this mountain I know I’m right where I belong.
With Honor.
Now.
And fucking forever.
She doesn’t know all that yet, but I plan on showing her. I’m not letting this innocent angel go. No way in hell. We’re just getting started.
I roll on a condom, wishing I weren’t, but I need to do everything in my power to treat this woman like she deserves. With respect and integrity.
“I need you so badly,” I tell her, easing myself inside of her. “I want to fill you up until your pussy explodes.”
She giggles beneath me. “Your words are so dirty, Hawk,” she says, wrapping her arms around my neck, looking into my eyes.
“You like it filthy, don’t you?” My cock loves her narrow cunt, and I fill her up so fucking fast.
“I’ve never had a man speak like that to me... but it sounds good on your lips. But I think...” she says, moaning as my cock presses inside of her, “I think anything would sound good coming from you.”
“I won’t just talk dirty then,” I tell her, running my hand over her large tits, still covered in a bra. “I’ll talk filthy-sweet to you, how does that sound?” I pump inside of her, her legs wrapping around me, rocking with me. Her wet little pussy tight around my cock.
“That sounds good,” she pants, her eyes closed as I fuck her under the dark sky and bright stars. She pants as I fuck her for the first time, swearing to a god I’ve never believed in that I won’t do anything to fuck up this moment for Honor. Not now, not ever.
“Oh, Hawk,” she moans, clawing at my back. “Don’t stop.”
“I’m not gonna stop, you pretty little angel; I’m gonna fuck you until your pussy whimpers; until you scream my name; until you’re ruined for all other men.”
She moans louder as I rock against her. I fill her up and she begs for more. I fuck her harder, imagining all the ways I am going to take her in the days and weeks and months to come.
On her back and against the wall. In the green grass and in the water. With her on her knees and my cock deep inside her. From behind, my hands on her luscious, creamy ass. I’ll fuck her until we collapse, and I’ll fuck her until we can’t see straight.
But now I fill her up, looking down at her like the goddess she is, her long hair strewn out, her pale blue eyes locked on mine, and I want to be the best man in the world, I want to carry her in my arms and make a home for her and protect her from the beasts in the world who don’t know what it means to take care of a woman.
“Oh, Hawk,” she cries, coming hard, her body pushing against me as I hold her close, as I pound her perfect pussy until I come too.
Until I feel a rip, and the reality hits me.
“Fuck.”
“What?” she manages as if trying to remember how to breathe. “What is it?”
“The condom,” I tell her as I come in her, wincing at the realization of what’s just happened. “I think it fucki
ng broke.”
Her eyes go soft.
“Are you on the pill?” I ask, brushing her hair from her eyes.
She shakes her head no, ever so softly. “But I think we’re okay,” she tells me.
“Fuck, you sure?”
“I know my cycle really well. I think we’re okay.”
I pull out of her, taking off the ripped condom. “In that case, let me fuck you again without that on.”
She blushes so hard I can see it under the light of the moon. “You want to... have me again?”
“No, I want to fuck you again.”
She nods. “Let’s.”
I roll beside her in the truck bed, and wrap my arm around her shoulders, she nestles against me. “I think we should get another condom first, Honor. The last thing I want to do is get you knocked up. You’re way too young to be a mother.”
At this, I feel her stiffen in my arms.
“What is it?” I ask.
“I should get home, actually.” She sits up, suddenly in a hurry.
“Let me get dressed and I’ll drive you back then.”
“Thanks, Hawk.” She smiles, slipping on her panties. “That was...”
“Fucking amazing,” I fill in for her.
She laughs, pulling on her dress. “Yes, it most certainly was.”
—
In the parking lot of Rosie’s diner, I realize I’m starving. I didn’t have dinner and only took a few bites of the pie.
“You wanna come in and get something to eat?” I ask. “I’m gonna go get a burger.”
She shakes her head. “No, I really need to go.”
“Well, I need your number first. Because, baby, this isn’t the last you’ll be seeing of me.”
She blushes again, her feelings so completely revealed, and I love that. She isn’t putting on a fucking show. She is exactly who she says she is.
“I don’t actually know my number...”
“What?” I cock a brow at her. “How do you not know your phone number?”
“I got a phone last week and haven’t memorized it.”
“You trying to get rid of me?”
She laughs. “No. Not at all. It’s just I honestly don’t know. Hey, why don’t you give me your number and I’ll call you?”
I nod, find a scrap of paper in the glove box and she presents me a pen from her purse.
I write the digits and hand it to her. “You better call me or I’ll be looking up and down this mountain for you. Understand?”
Smiling, she takes it. “Understood.”
“You sure you’ll be okay driving home alone?”
She looks at me like I’m crazy. “I know how to take care of myself,” she says.
I nod, taking her hand and kissing it. “I believe you know how to do a lot of things, Honor.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah. Like you knew how to steal my fucking heart.”
She bites her bottom lip.
“You mean that, Hawk?”
I nod. “I never say things I don’t mean.”
She leans over, kisses me softly, a kiss that could be mistaken for a whisper. “Neither do I.”
“So, if I tell you I’ve fallen for you in the space of one night, what would you say to that?” I ask.
She runs her hand over my beard, through my hair, touching me so tenderly that there is no denying she has the hands of a saint. She could fucking heal my hard edges with those hands.
“I’d say I am one very lucky woman.” She kisses me again, then adds, “And I’d say my wish came true.”
She gets out of the truck, then, not looking back and I watch her climb into a minivan, with rusted hubcaps and a crack down the front window. She drives away and all I can do is hope like hell she calls.
If not, I’ll be combing this mountain for her.
Chapter Seven
Honor
Harper and Jaxon want to know how my night went, and I thank them for giving me a few uninterrupted hours.
“Of course; we’re family,” Harper says. She and Jax are snuggled up on the couch with their youngest between them. The rest of the house is asleep.
“Speaking of family, it sounds like my cousin is gonna be here tonight. He texted me a few hours ago, saying he was coming into town a day earlier than we expected him.”
“Is it rude if I don’t stay up to greet him?” I ask, feeling exhausted. I’m craving alone time to think through what I did tonight.
“Not at all,” Jax says. “You’ll meet tomorrow.”
“Okay, thanks,” I say. “Goodnight then.”
In my room, I check on the boys, all three of them are out cold, and I step into the Jack and Jill bathroom and lock the other door, connecting to the other guest room. I’m not sure when Jaxon’s cousin will be getting in and I want to take a shower before I go to bed.
I turn on the hot water and slip off my clothes. I look at myself in the full-length mirror, my breasts feeling full since it’s been a few hours since I’ve nursed Titus. I trace the places Hawk touched me, not feeling ashamed for sleeping with a stranger, letting a man I’d never known before fill me with himself.
My body has changed so much over the last three years, my boys all less than a year apart. I’m grateful Hawk saw me in the dark, when my less beautiful parts were hidden, I don’t think I would have had the guts to strip to nothing in front of him with the lights on.
I step into the shower and wash away the night, but not the memory. No, that is tucked close to my heart, and not going anywhere.
___
In the morning, the first thing I hear is someone knocking. Not on my door, but on a different one. I jolt out of bed, not having slept so soundly in ages, but apparently, my body needed a massive orgasm in order to sleep through the night. Titus is in bed with me, still out cold, and Timothy and Thomas are sleeping too. It must be early.
I roll my arm out from under Titus, careful not to wake him, and tiptoe from the bed, pulling at my tank top as I walk to the noise in the bathroom.
I open my door and realize the knocking is from the other side of the bathroom door. You can only access the bathroom from the guest rooms and I realize I left that door locked last night.
And Jax’s cousin is coming in.
I’m in a pair of leggings, and my breasts, while not in a bra, are at least covered.
“Sorry,” I say. “I totally locked you out.”
I open the door and just about fall on my face.
“What?” I sputter, looking at the man before me. “Uh, who, wha… uh? Hawk?”
He looks equally shocked.
“Honor?”
“Did you follow me home? Why are you? What is...”
He shakes his head. “I didn’t follow you. Hell, let me get this straight.” He pauses, running his hand down his beard as if trying to process seeing me here. I’m trying to process it too. “You’re Harper’s cousin?”
“Yes. And you are?”
“Benjamin Hawk.”
“Ben. Cousin Ben. You are Jaxon’s cousin?”
He nods, grinning now, and steps toward me. “I want to talk, I really do, but I gotta piss like a motherfucker.”
I shake my head. “You can’t talk like that; not here,” I tell him.
He steps past me and pulls out the glorious cock I had inside of me the night before. I can’t breathe.
“No,” I hiss. “The kids.”
He shrugs. “Harper and Jax have their kids upstairs with them. And the house is still asleep.”
I shake my head, unable to get out a sentence.
“I thought it was too good to be true, that I met you last night. But it wasn’t just in my head. This is destiny, Honor,” he tells me, looking over his shoulder at me as he pees in the toilet.
How is this even my life?
“No,” I wave my hands in the air. “It’s not... it’s complicated.”
He pulls up his boxers, looking cocky and disheveled with his bed head, his shirtless chest,
his tattoos more menacing in the light.
“Not that complicated. Just a few crazy kids shacking up at their cousins’ place. Doesn’t seem complicated, seems like fate.”
I exhale, distraught. My high from last night fading fast as the reality of the day glares in my face.
I don’t know what to say, but I don’t have to say anything at all. Titus’ cry says more than my words ever could.
“Shit, did we wake up Harper’s babies?”
I laugh a little too sharply. Colder than I ever am. But also sad, realizing more than ever that whatever magic washed over Hawk and I last night is going to fade fast. I already made my choices. Three choices named Thomas, Timothy, and Titus.
“That’s not Harper’s babies,” I tell him, stepping back in my room, the door opening wide enough for him to see the truth. “Those are my babies.”
I know Hawk’s eyes are on me as I take Titus from the bed and pull him into my arms, but I don’t know what to say. I wasn’t lying when I said it was complicated.
“You’re a mother?” he asks, stepping into my room. A movement that surprises me, because honestly, I thought for sure he’d run away.
I nod, sitting on my bed, cradling my three-month-old in one arm, and pulling down my top, offering him my milk.
“A mother of three.”
Hawk is in the middle of my room, in his boxers, and looks at Timothy, then Thomas in their respective Pack ‘n Plays.
He swallows, and I swear he looks... choked up. Is that possible? “Are you a wife, too?” he asks, his jaw tight, his eyebrows in a firm line.
I shake my head. “Not exactly.” I swallow. “But like I said... it’s complicated.”
“Want to try and untangle it?” he asks, sitting down beside me on the bed.
He doesn’t walk away, he stays. Like he genuinely wants to find the ends of the string and thread them back through properly.
The Mountain Man’s Babies: Books 1-5 Page 33