I puffed out a heavy breath just as Stella pawed me, as if to say she was there for me. I glanced over at her. “I love you too. You know, guys are maddening.”
One in particular. I was approaching the end of the first week of school, and it felt like so much had changed in the blink of an eye. With Dad and now Colton, my emotions were on the precipice of falling off a cliff—a perfect storm was brewing, and I knew that when it hit, I was going to fall hard, and that terrified me.
Still, I couldn’t shake the entire convo between Colton and me—or rather what had been left unsaid. He knew he was affecting me.
My hand crept down to my panties. I had a constant ache that needed some form of release. Maybe then I would feel like I wasn’t about to explode. I was a virgin, but I wasn’t exactly naïve to that pulsing between my legs. I’d slipped my fingers inside my panties when a car door slammed. I checked the time on my ceiling—I had one of those clocks that flashed the neon red numbers in the dark room. Three a.m.
It was probably Colton’s dad waltzing in like usual, drunk out of his mind. I’d said I wasn’t nosy, but I guessed I was. I had to peek. I climbed out of bed, that pulsing need gone until I ever so lightly pulled down a slat in the blinds. Then the throbbing hit me like a tornado. Colton stood against his truck, shirtless, hair messy around his strong jaw. The spotlight from his garage beamed at him like he was on stage. It took me a beat to realize he was looking up in my direction.
Oh hell no.
Faster than the Flash, I let go of the blind and slapped a hand over my heart. I didn’t know whether to be creeped out or excited beyond belief. I was going for the second option, since the butterflies were fluttering around in my stomach, seeming to travel south in droves. I squeezed my eyes closed for a breath to commit his bare chest to memory until a thought came out of nowhere.
He was just getting home and probably from a romp in the hay with Amanda. The need to scream was on the tip of my tongue.
Stella pushed her head against my leg and I jumped a mile. Do I look again? Or do I go back to bed? The answer to my second question was a flat no. I wouldn’t be able to sleep even if someone paid me a million dollars. I also wasn’t going to give Colton any ammunition to think I couldn’t keep my nose out of his business.
Given that he lived next door and the walls were thin, it would be hard not to see or hear what our neighbors were up to. Only a strip of land about twenty-five feet wide separated his house from mine.
Stella mewled at my feet as if to tell me to go back to bed. Instead, I picked her up. I needed something to quench the thirst in my dry throat. “I’m going to get some water.”
I carried her with me, passing my other window, which had a clear view of Mrs. Caldwell’s office. I pulled back my curtain, then cracked open the blinds. Her room was dark. I didn’t know what I was expecting, although Georgia’s comment came to mind: You could sneak into his room at night.
I didn’t know if Mrs. Caldwell had moved her office out to accommodate her son. I only knew the window I was looking at had been his bedroom before he’d left for the academy. One of the first weeks after I’d moved in, I’d forgotten to close my curtains, and I’d never been more horrified than when I caught Colton staring at me. It wouldn’t have been embarrassing except I’d been completely naked.
I shook off the memory as I tiptoed out, careful not to wake Nan, who was sleeping in the other bedroom on the second floor.
I set Stella down when I entered the kitchen. After getting a drink of water, I decided to check on Dad. I’d gotten into the habit of poking my head in when I couldn’t sleep.
A light filtered out of Dad’s room. Maybe he was awake. Or maybe Nan had forgotten to shut off the lights. Stella followed me in. Dad liked when she curled up with him. I did the same on occasion. His hospital bed wasn’t that big, but I always found a small nook to snuggle next to him for a few minutes.
His computer screen was brightening the room, and I zeroed in on a picture of three older women smiling at the camera from a table in a restaurant. They appeared to be having a good time, drinks in hand.
Dad snored lightly as I studied the picture. All three women had varying shades of brown hair and brown eyes, and the one in the middle snagged my attention. She wore a cool, round, silver charm necklace that had some sort of inscription on it.
Dad stirred, yawning. He blinked a couple of times, then gave me a faraway look as Stella nestled in-between his legs.
“Go back to sleep. I was just shutting off your computer.” I rubbed his nose with mine. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
With all the strength he had, which was nil, he tensed and lowered his gaze to the slim spot next to him.
I wished upon a star every chance I had that he could talk, that I could hear his voice again, even if it was to say one word.
I crawled in as best I could and snuggled into him. “I love you, Dad.” Tears burned as hot as a fireplace poker. “I really want to hear your voice again.”
He moved so his cheek was on the top of my head, a gesture that said he wanted the same thing.
I swung my arm over his chest. I had so much I wanted to say, but couldn’t without shedding an ocean of tears.
“Colton is going to fix the wheel on my skateboard. I need a new front axle assembly.” Colton had called it a wheelbase, but I didn’t correct him. I’d been so wrapped up in the close proximity of his body that I couldn’t think. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about him hitting me. I just don’t want you to worry.”
I was sure he had several things to say about my skateboard, about being careful, and so on.
“It won’t happen again,” I whispered. I did need to be more alert when riding in the streets or through parking lots.
We lay there as Stella snored.
Dad laughed weakly. Granted, he couldn’t speak, but he did make grunting and laughing sounds.
“I should get back to my room,” I said. I could have fallen asleep next to Dad, but I wasn’t the best sleeping companion. I had a habit of taking over the whole bed, and I was a restless sleeper, which meant I would either end up on the floor or kicking Dad and hurting him. I hugged him as tightly as I could. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
He blinked in agreement.
Stella didn’t move. I was about to grab her when Dad shook his head.
I kept the door ajar so Stella could get out. On my way upstairs, I wondered if Colton was still outside. Probably not, but as always, my curiosity got the better of me, and I quietly padded over to the front window in the family room, my pulse soaring to new heights. Holding my breath, I gently moved the curtain out of the way with one finger and angled my head to get a view of his driveway, which was dark save for the landscape lights around a pear tree that stood between our property lines.
Exhaling, I let the curtain fall and quietly went to my room. I had to shut off my brain. I had to get at least a couple hours of sleep before school or I would be a zombie in every class.
I huffed as I flopped onto my mattress, my mind racing with thoughts of Dad, Colton, and homework. The only way to clear my head was to read. I got up and switched on the bedside lamp. As I hunted for that thriller novel I’d been reading, a soft glow lit up the space between Colton’s house and mine.
Don’t look, Skye.
But my legs had a mind of their own, and before I could think, I was standing in front of my window and looking directly into Colton’s bedroom. The blood drained from my cheeks, and several expletives dropped from my lips in a whisper.
My belly did a thousand somersaults as I watched Colton unbuttoning his jeans. As if he could sense me watching him, he lifted his head.
My stomach hollowed as horror careened through me and maybe awe too. I had a front-row seat to perfection. I licked my lips, but only because my mouth was dry. That ache in-between my legs was back with a vengeance.
Colton continued to remove his jeans while never taking his eyes off me. I couldn’t look away. T
hat pronounced V that disappeared below the waistband of his boxer briefs, the one Mia talked about on Grady, was ever-present on Colton.
He gave me a predatory grin that only served to make the sweat break out on the nape of my neck.
Go back to bed, Skyler.
Not a chance in hell. I couldn’t move, and I didn’t want to.
Colton stalked closer to his window.
I inched away from mine.
His grin grew wider, and if that wasn’t the most belly-squeezing look I’d ever seen, I didn’t know what was. I was a goner for sure. His pecs were toned to perfection. His biceps were lick-worthy, and if his Greek god upper torso wasn’t enough to soak my panties, then what was growing in his boxer briefs was sending me over the edge.
He cocked his head as he watched me watch him, and when he slid his hand down to his crotch, my mouth fell open.
He grabbed his erection, never taking his eyes off me.
What in the world is happening? My heart rammed against my ribs like crazy. droplets of sweat trickled down my back, and that pulsing need between my legs was stronger than ever before.
I had to get out of there. If he whipped out his dick, I would probably faint or maybe run over to his house and attack him. While the latter was a great idea, I didn’t have the courage to do that, and I wasn’t that girl.
Why not? It’s just sex. Mia does it all the time and she’s happy. It’s part of growing up too.
With my luck, I would look like a dimwit. Regardless of my inexperience, I didn’t know if Colton was the kiss-and-tell type, and since he hung out with Grady, there was no way in hell was I making the first move.
If Grady got wind that I’d come on to Colton, he would spread horrible rumors about me being an easy lay or a tramp or something. I wouldn’t be able to show my face in school anymore.
So I rolled my eyes at myself, and in clear Skyler stick-foot-in-mouth fashion, I flipped Colton off before storming out of my room with a throbbing ache in my body that was never going away. Ever!
11
The surf crashed along the shore, and music pumped out of the speakers, the party in full force behind Grady’s sprawling beachside mansion. It seemed the entire high school was there. Some kids danced, some hovered around one of the two kegs, and others sat on blankets or in beach chairs, chatting around the bonfire.
Mia, Georgia, and I were somewhat away from the fire, but we were close to a group of cackling girls. One was gesturing with her hands while speaking.
I was glad the week was finally over, and I felt like the stress I’d been carrying was leaving me, thanks in part to the beer I was drinking.
“Our first week of senior year is behind us,” Mia said from her chair across from me.
“Hallelujah,” Georgia squeaked out beside me.
I raised my beer. “For sure.” The first week had been epic. Colton returned home. I’d been hit by a car. My skateboard was still toast, and my aunt was due to arrive that night. Dad wanted me to hang at home, but Nan had come to my rescue.
“You probably should spend some time with your sister alone first,” Nan had told him.
I’d almost hugged the crap out of her. If the circumstances with Dad changed prior to my eighteenth birthday, somehow or some way, I was not moving to California. North Carolina was my home, and it would stay that way even if I had to throw the biggest temper tantrum this side of the Mississippi.
Mia raised her perfectly manicured dark eyebrow. “Are you going to nurse that cup all night? Both of you. Loosen up. It’s our senior year.”
Georgia giggled, then gulped down a mouthful of her beer.
I brought the red cup to my lips. “I’ve been drinking it.” Maybe not as fast as Mia. I’d been counting, and she’d been to the keg twice, while Georgia and I were on our first round.
Mia watched me intently. “Not fast enough.”
I usually didn’t give into peer pressure, but the alcohol was relaxing me, and it was a nice feeling to hang with my friends, enjoy a drink, listen to good music, inhale the salt air, and just let loose.
“It’s called pacing,” Georgia said. “We have hours to go.” She swung out her arm and tapped my shoulder. “Drink.”
I huffed. “Fine. But if I make a fool of myself, please come to my rescue.”
“Always,” Mia and Georgia said in unison.
I believed Georgia. Mia, not so much. I loved the girl to death, but her attention span when Grady was around was nil. I couldn’t blame her. I might have been the same way if Colton and I were dating.
I took a big gulp, the skunk smell burning my nose hairs. “This shit is nasty.”
My friends laughed as Mia hopped out of her chair. “I have something better. Be right back.”
Georgia and I exchanged a wide-eyed look. “This isn’t good.”
Mia rubbed her big tits up against Grady, who was standing by the fire with a few of his cronies from the football team. The bright flames highlighted Grady’s excited expression when he glanced down at Mia. If I wasn’t mistaken, I thought I saw a hint of awe in the QB’s eyes. The two were becoming quite the item.
“She really likes him.” My pitch went up a notch. Mia deserved to be happy, and for as much as Grady could be an ass, he did too. I thought they made a great couple. Mia was the yin to his yang.
“She does,” Georgia agreed. “I don’t think Grady is interested in anyone else, either.”
“I’m shocked. I mean, not that he likes Mia. She’s beautiful. But I’ve only ever known Grady to play the field.”
Georgia raised her knees so her feet were planted on the lounge chair. “I think she’s taming him.”
“I would like to see that. Maybe he’ll stop talking shit about me to Colton.”
Georgia rounded her green gaze to me. “What shit?”
I hadn’t told Georgia or Mia everything that Colton had said to me in my garage or that I’d seen him in his boxer briefs. The less I talked about him, the better for my psyche. But if I didn’t tell Georgia, she would be upset. I also didn’t want to make a big deal about Grady’s comment. I was trying not to let it bother me. But the liquor was toying with my emotions. “Grady thinks I look better with long hair.”
She gasped. “Colton told you that?”
I shuddered. “I shouldn’t have cut my hair.”
She slapped my leg. “Nonsense. You’re beautiful.”
“Thank you, chica. I wasn’t looking for a compliment.” I searched the partygoers. “You think Colton will be here?”
Maybe he wasn’t coming. When Georgia had picked me up, his truck had been in the driveway. I wondered if he’d gotten into a fight with his dad again. Or maybe he was grounded. Regardless, it was probably best I didn’t see him. I still hadn’t recovered from the other night.
Georgia nursed her beer. “He’s probably running late.”
Or getting pummeled by his dad. It was time to change the subject and get my mind off my crush. But it was hard to get the image of him in his boxer briefs out of my head.
“Are you still going to throw your party next weekend?” I asked Georgia.
“Of course. We need to live it up this year. Make memories and all that.”
“If my dad gets his way, I might be leaving with my aunt.” I was going out on a limb on that one—the alcohol was starting to screw with me. I didn’t really think Dad would ship me off while he was still alive.
She jabbed a long blue nail into my bare leg. “You are not moving.” Her tone was harder than the large rock next to my chair. “You’re just going to have to show your aunt you are not a good girl. I doubt she would want to take on a teenage brat.” She searched my face as she frowned. “I say this with heartfelt emotion. Your dad isn’t gone yet, Skyler Lawson, and he wouldn’t ship you off while he’s still alive.”
I sipped my beer. The more I drank, the less I noticed the skunk smell. “Let’s not talk about that right now. We’re supposed to have fun. Right?”
On my last w
ord, I spotted Colton sauntering down the path from the house. Georgia and I had our backs to the ocean just so we could people watch better.
Georgia followed my line of sight, and that frown turned into an instant smile. “Yum to the nth degree. Now the party is heating up. You have got to lose your virginity to him. If you don’t, I will.”
It was my turn to poke her with my short nails. I didn’t paint them like she and Mia did. I mainly chewed on them, a habit I’d developed since learning Dad had ALS. “Not on your life.”
“Chill. I’m just kidding. Well, maybe not. That hair of his. I just want to run my fingers through it.”
“I saw him in his boxer briefs the other night.” I took another gulp of beer, suddenly regretting saying that, since I caught one of the girls on the blanket jerk her head in our direction.
Georgia screamed so loud it hurt my ears. Thankfully, the waves crashed at the perfect time to drown out the conversation.
She swung her legs over her chair and leaned into me. “How come you’re just telling me this now?”
My face burned as images of the other night danced before me. “For this reason.” I twirled a finger around her excited yet shocked expression. Might as well give her the biggest news of them all. “He’s huge too.”
“He had a boner?” Shock slammed into Georgia’s sweet Southern voice before she raised her cup. “This calls for a drink.”
Mia skipped back at that moment with a liter of marshmallow vodka—ew.
“Okay, ladies. Time to taste the good stuff.” Mia sat on the edge of my chair, facing Georgia. She uncapped the bottle and drank like she was thirsty after a long cheer workout.
Georgia dumped her beer and grabbed the bottle.
My eyes bugged out.
Georgia shrugged. “What? You just told me you saw Colton’s boner. I need to quiet my lady hormones.”
Mia squealed. “Did you two fuck?”
It was my turn to drink.
Mia and Georgia waited for me to tell them more. There wasn’t much to tell, and the less Mia knew, the better. She was too close to Grady. I didn’t know why I was worried about her, though, since Colton probably told him that he teased me until my panties were soaked. He wouldn’t have been wrong.
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