He doesn’t want to be friends.
He lifted me up, and I squealed, my eyes colliding with his. That blank mask he’d always worn came down, and behind it was something I wasn’t prepared for—hunger.
My legs wound around his waist as though they had a mind of their own.
He moaned or growled. I honestly couldn’t tell because my pulse was pounding so loudly in my ears that I couldn’t hear much else.
He carried me to my doorstep, searching my face, seemingly snapping picture after picture.
Call me crazy, but his dick was stone beneath me. I tightened my hold around him, hoping he got the message not to let me go. I wasn’t sure I could stand, anyway. With my luck, my legs would give out the moment my feet were on the ground.
Then his lips grazed my ear. “You need to stop getting under my skin, Skyler. I have a lot of control, but every time I look at you, I want to lose that control.”
I gasped, clinging to him like he was my lifeline. I wasn’t sure how to respond. He was right—he had self-restraint. He’d let his dad beat him and hadn’t reacted. But the way he was suddenly nibbling on my ear told me that control of his was something far different than unleashing any anger.
“Stay here tonight,” I whispered in a breathy tone.
He tensed, his lips on my ear. “In your bed?”
God, yes. “You can sleep on the couch.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he whispered. “My control is ready to snap.”
“Then let it snap, Colton.”
He dragged his scruffy jaw along mine, his lips never touching my face. I was tempted to turn so our mouths would meet, but maybe he was right. Nan was probably wondering where I was or watching, although her view was probably obscured since Colton and I were against the front door.
“I’m going to put you down now,” he said reluctantly. “Then I’m going to get in my truck.”
I pouted but said nothing as I slid down every inch of his hard body. He groaned when my stomach grazed his erection.
I closed my eyes for a second, absorbing all of him, and when I was on two feet and shaky legs, I flattened my palm on his jaw. “You’re a good person, Colton Caldwell.” I had other words on my brain, but they escaped me.
He leaned into my touch. “No, I’m not.” He took one step back, his gaze never wavering from mine. He was allowing me to see so much emotion—restraint, desire, anger, and sadness. Then he blinked, breaking our connection, and just like that, he was walking away.
I gnawed on my lip, my legs trembling, my body screaming for him to come back. He didn’t have to worry about his control. I was sure I would lose mine too.
As his engine faded, I snuck into the house and ran right into Nan.
She stood with her arms crossed, looking out the window in the family room. “Is Colton okay?”
I lifted a shoulder, my body singing and heated. “I don’t know.” He was a dichotomy between his words and his actions.
“He likes you, you know.”
I snorted. “He says he’s not interested.”
She half grinned. “I’m sure that isn’t true. I saw how he was looking at you when you were on the steps.”
I hoped she was right, but for the time being, my body was on fire, and there was only one way to douse the flames. So I ran up to my room to finish what I’d started earlier.
18
The sweltering late Saturday morning sun mingled with a few wispy clouds. The September weather felt like the middle of July—hot and humid. The only difference was that the beach wasn’t as crowded. Tourists had packed up and gone home not long after Labor Day.
Sinking my feet into the sand, I scanned the immediate vicinity. The tide was low, and the waves slid along the sandy shore like a conductor leading an orchestra through Beethoven’s Symphony No. 2. Mom came to mind as I searched for Georgia among the handful of beachgoers who lounged on blankets and in chairs.
Mom had loved classical music, and I’d often found her listening to a symphony while she sketched on the back porch, absorbed in her craft as a way to unwind and relax.
I did one last pass, not seeing Georgia. Her text that morning had said to meet at the beach. Maybe I’d read it wrong. Hiking my bag higher on my shoulder, I opened the text app on my phone.
Georgia: Beach. Noon. Be there.
I didn’t misinterpret her message. “Beach” meant our usual spot. It always had. I checked the time. I was five minutes early. Maybe she was running late.
I was primed to text Georgia when a little boy squealed. “Mom, look at my sandcastle. Isn’t it awesome?”
With the nod, the mom acknowledged the blond-haired tyke before she resumed reading.
I couldn’t help but remember when Dad and I would build sandcastles.
Don’t you dare cry, Skyler Lawson.
My phone rang, distracting me from the emotions that wanted to break free.
“Where are you?” Georgia shouted in my ear.
I scratched my neck. “What? I’m at our usual spot.”
“Yikes. Didn’t I text you to meet on the beach in front of Grady’s?”
“Um, that’s a fat no. Why Grady’s?” Colton was there, and I wasn’t ready to see him, but the butterflies in my stomach said otherwise. Truth be told, I was anxious to see how we would react to each other after our intimate and intense encounter on my porch. I was curious if he would blow me off as if nothing had happened or if he would act awkward. I knew I would do just that.
“Shit. Sorry. My mom and I got into it about something stupid, and I spaced. Just get your cute butt down here. Mia and I are hanging.”
“Is anyone else with you?” I couldn’t see Colton lounging on the beach with Mia and Georgia unless Grady was with him. Even then, Colton didn’t strike me as the type to lie on the beach.
She snorted. “If you’re asking about Colton, then yes. He’s here, but he and Grady are playing pool in the game room.”
“Maybe I should bag out today.” As soon as the words dribbled from my mouth, I knew I was in trouble.
In true Georgia fashion, her voice sounded like a bomb going off in my ear. “Like hell you will. If I have to come get you and drag you by the arm, I will. And you’ll want to hear what I learned, anyway. Before you ask, it does involve you. So chop chop.” Then the line went dead.
I couldn’t even begin to think of what she’d heard. So much had happened in the last eighteen hours. I’d found out I was adopted. I’d witnessed a father beating his son. And above all else, I’d had not one, but two moments with Colton.
Georgia and Mia were about to get an earful, unless Colton had overheard that I was adopted. After all, I’d been on our deck when I read the letter. But if he had, and he’d told Georgia, she would’ve been at my house the second she found out.
Ten minutes later, I was dropping my mesh bag, which had my towel and wallet inside, on Georgia’s sun-kissed stomach.
She sat up. “What the…” She removed her sunglasses, squinting up at me, ready to break my nose. “You’re lucky this isn’t heavy.” She tossed my bag on the sand.
“That’s for sending me to the wrong location.” Playfulness weaved through my words.
She rolled her big green eyes as she rested back on her elbows. “You love me.”
No question about that.
Mia popped up from her spot next to Georgia and adjusted a strap on her white bikini top, which was blinding against her tanned skin. “Took you long enough.”
I threw both of them the finger.
A laugh bounced around as the three of us giggled. I snagged the striped towel big enough to be a blanket from my bag and spread it next to Georgia. Then I shimmied out of my frayed denim shorts and my black tank top.
Mia tried to whistle. “Girl, Colton is going to drool over those sculpted abs.”
A blush stained my cheeks as I stole a look at the whitewashed mansion behind us. Colton had seen me in my tiny top and sleep shorts with no bra, so
I guessed a bikini wasn’t any different.
“She’s right,” Georgia said. “Colton will not be able to take his eyes off you.” She sighed. “I wish I could find someone who made me all wet and gooey.”
I sat cross-legged on my towel, facing both of them.
Mia tilted her head at Georgia, and when she did, thick strands of her brown hair fell from her hair clip. “I could arrange something for you.”
Georgia straightened and picked up the bottle of sunscreen next to her. “Thanks, but no thanks.” She proceeded to lather the lotion on her shoulders and chest, careful not to get any on her red swim top. “I’ll pick my own.” Her voice was a tad sad.
I knew she was thinking of Kyle, a guy with hair as dark as night and eyes the color of the shores off Bora Bora. Sadly for Georgia, Kyle had only been a fleeting crush. He was a tourist who had spent the summer in one of the rental homes in town. They really hadn’t done much beyond groping, but he’d stolen her heart much like Colton had mine.
I reached out and touched her thigh. “You should text him.”
She capped the top of the sunscreen. “Nope.” Her resolve was strong. “Kyle is dead to me.”
Mia and I swapped a pained look for our dear friend.
“Skye, care to dish about why Colton is talking to Grady about you?” Mia changed the subject quite quickly.
I could feel my eyebrows dipping down. “He told Grady about last night?”
Georgia’s somber expression disappeared into the salt air as she reared back, her smile galvanizing. “You had sex with Colton?”
Mia whipped off her sunglasses. “’Bout time. How was it?”
With my hands, I gave them a coach’s time-out signal. “Slow your roll, you two.” I quickly glanced at Grady’s house just to be sure Colton wasn’t lurking—or Grady, for that matter. We were far enough away that they couldn’t hear our conversation even if they were outside. “I wish. But we did have a moment. A very sexy one.” I had a permanent blush, which wasn’t going away as long as we kept talking about Colton.
Georgia adjusted her bikini top around her breasts, checking to make sure her ladies weren’t falling out. She had Mia and me beat in the chest department. “Start from the beginning.”
Automatically, I, too, checked my swim top. I was a bit self-conscious ever since they’d fallen out one summer at the water park.
Georgia tapped my leg. “Details.”
“Wait,” I said. “What did you learn that involved me?” Obviously, it wasn’t about my sexy moment with Colton. So what did he tell Grady?
Georgia exchanged a somber look with Mia.
My nerves perked up. Maybe he’d told Grady he’d gotten laid. Friends did tell friends that, and in some cases, they lied about it.
“Don’t deflect,” Georgia said so seriously. “Spill your guts about that sexy man.”
Mia and Georgia leaned in, salivating for all the juicy details.
“I’m adopted.” I wanted to start there rather than give them a play-by-play of Colton and me. I would tell them eventually, but right now, I had to get the adoption news off my chest.
Shock slammed into Georgia’s expression, then volleyed to Mia, whose chin hit her bright orange towel.
Georgia’s wide eyes were glued to me. “What the fuck? For real?”
I picked sand off my ankle. “It’s true. My dad told me yesterday.”
“You don’t seem freaked out,” Mia said.
I hiked one shoulder up to my ear. “I’m still processing.” I didn’t know how to unpack my feelings on the topic.
Georgia rubbed her lips together. “I have no words.”
My eyebrows climbed to my hairline. “Now that is a shocker.” A light, playful tease colored my tone. Usually my BFF always had something to say, even if she was caught off guard.
“I don’t know whether to say sorry or… I don’t know. That had to be extremely hard for your dad to tell you,” Georgia said.
My head started bobbing like an idle boat riding the waves. “He was gutted. It broke my heart. One of the reasons I’m not ready to deal with the whole adoption thing. I feel if I do, I’m hurting him. He deserves to be as happy as he can be with the time he has left. The good news is that Nan is going to be my guardian.”
Georgia clapped and squealed. “That’s great news. That means you don’t have to move.”
“Exactly,” I said as movement caught my eye on Grady’s deck.
Georgia and Mia both looked behind them.
Colton sauntered down shirtless, wearing royal-blue swim trunks low on his hips. I wished I’d worn sunglasses so he couldn’t see me drooling—that prominent V disappearing into his swim trunks was making me squeeze my thighs together.
Grady stopped him, and they chatted.
Mia pressed her lips into a thin line. “Colton’s father is a monster.”
I bobbed my head. With Colton in close proximity, I didn’t want to give them all the details. Colton’s nose had been bloody, but I was curious if he had black eyes. “I couldn’t agree with you more.”
“Aside from his split lip and bruised jaw, Colton seems different,” Georgia said.
“No black eyes?” I asked.
“None.” Mia sighed as though she was relieved for Colton. “And he’s different because of our pretty friend here.” She smiled at me.
My stomach hollowed. “What?”
Georgia leaned into me. “That’s what we want to tell you. Mia overheard Colton talking to Grady this morning. Your name came up.”
Oh, this I had to hear. My gaze burned a hole into Mia.
She scooted closer and whispered, “Colton said that if it weren’t for you, he might have driven into a tree last night.”
I scrunched my nose. “Come again?”
“Apparently, after his fight with his dad, he was so mad he couldn’t see straight. He told Grady you were the one who brought him down off the ledge,” Mia said.
“Huh.” I had no other words, but my stomach churned like a storm in rough seas, my pulse unsteady. If I hadn’t run out of the house to stop him from leaving… holy shit! What if I’d woken up that day and Colton was gone? Surely he hadn't been thinking of harming or killing himself. No. No. No.
Georgia’s gaze latched onto mine. “Don’t go there.”
“How can I not?” My hands trembled.
“Skye,” Mia said softly. “He’s here. And he has Grady and us.”
She rubbed my leg. “Mia’s right. He’s got us and you. What did you say to him?”
I eyed Colton, who was still chatting with Grady. They seemed to be in a serious convo. Maybe Grady was knocking some sense into him. “I asked him to stay at my house, and before I knew what was happening, I was in his arms. Then he said some things about his control being ready to snap around me.”
Mia’s expression lightened as she gave me a cheeky grin. “You need to make the first move. Sometimes guys don’t know how to.”
“Says my sex therapist.” I laughed, but it was laden with nerves.
Georgia giggled, followed by Mia, and just like that, the tension and despair snapped.
“She’s right,” Georgia said. “And sounds to me like he wants you badly.”
If he did, he had an odd way of showing it. In one breath, he’d told me to stay away from him. In another, he was ready to eat me whole.
Grady’s voice cut through my Colton problem as he and Colton finally drew near.
“We’ll talk later,” I said. My pulse was on a fast-moving train whenever Colton approached.
19
Bending over, Grady kissed Mia on the head, then whispered something in her ear that made her cheeks flush. I was speechless. I had never seen Grady so loving before.
In contrast, Colton tucked his hands into the pockets of his swim trunks and stared out at the Atlantic, not looking at me or anyone. He seemed as though someone had shocked him into silence, and I was silently pointing the finger at myself. Nevertheless, his bottom lip was swo
llen, and he did have a bruised jaw. The area around his eyes was pinched, but I didn’t see any discoloring.
The tension skyrocketed into the clear blue sky. Good thing we were out in the open air, where oxygen was in great supply. Otherwise, if we were in a closed room with no windows or a way out, I would’ve been laboring for breath.
Grady got comfortable behind Mia, kicking out his strong legs and big feet. The dude was a giant. “Lawson, where’s your skateboard?” His tone was nice and even and didn’t hold the animosity it usually did when he spoke to me.
If I hadn’t been with Georgia and Mia, I would have thought I was in some alternate universe. Or maybe Mia had trained him well.
I narrowed my eyes at the blond QB. “Not here.” My tone held a smidge of sarcasm. It was hard to shuck the snarky attitude with Grady. It didn’t help that I was on edge.
Grady glared daggers at me with those blue eyes of his. He went to open his mouth, but Mia clutched his thigh as though she could sense him about to spew a retort.
It didn’t matter if he did. I was ready to spar if Grady wanted to. Maybe that would jar Colton from his frozen state for good. He snuck a look at me for a split second before he resumed his soldier position, as though he was guarding Buckingham Palace.
My stomach twisted and twined in an overpowering need to shout at Colton, to fracture that wall he’d built around him. To hell with swapping words with Grady. Colton needed a jolt of something. Sadly, I didn’t have the nerve to be the one to shake him back to reality.
I couldn’t believe how he’d changed since the first day of school, when he’d been kind and nice. He hit you with his truck. He had to be nice. I knew the fights with his dad were one cause of his darkness, but I also believed I’d played a part in his crankiness.
After all, he’d said, “You need to stop getting under my skin, Skyler. I have a lot of control, but every time I look at you, I want to lose that control.”
It was clear by the tension in his shoulders that he was hanging on by a thread, and amid the host of emotions thrumming through me, pity stood out. But I didn’t want to feel sorry for him because I didn’t like when others did that to me. Mia and Georgia had been great in taking my mind off Dad and showing me how much they loved me. Colton needed someone who could do the same. I would gladly step up, and I’d tried, but he didn’t want a friend, and he wasn’t interested in me. His words, not mine. I took comfort in knowing he had Grady.
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