by Leslie North
Mila smirked. “Not yet, though I am pregnant, which I guess will be making me ill soon. But, obviously, I didn’t know about that when I left after we’d been together. I just wanted to have one night to blow off steam and enjoy myself—and that was exactly what I got. I was perfectly happy to leave things there.”
Lainey looked doubtful, but finally she nodded. “Well, I trust your gut. He sure does look nice, but you’re probably right. Have you told him?”
“Yep. I told him yesterday. And…” A sigh launched out of her.
“That sigh doesn’t sound good. What did she say?”
“Not much, honestly. He received it pretty well, I guess. I mean, for the detonated bomb that news like this feels like, yes, he handled it well. He didn’t accuse me of lying or say the baby wasn’t his. He supported my choice to keep it, and said he’d cover the medical bills. But he didn’t really want to talk details. He told me I’d be taken care of financially, and that was it.”
Lainey frowned, reflecting the same sentiment that Mila felt on the inside.
“So…”
Mila’s gut wrenched the same way it did whenever she thought back on Grayson’s lukewarm reception. “I plan to bring it up with him a little further down the road, so we can figure out details. But right now, I’m not expecting him to be involved much. Maybe he’ll decide to be a part of the baby’s life. Maybe not. Money would be nice, especially since things are a little tight already, but it’s not the priority here.”
“Do you want to be with him?”
Yes. She blinked hard, trying to efface that automatic reaction from her mind. It wasn’t right to want to be with him. Not when they were still basically strangers and it was clear that the man had many other more important things to tend to. And so did she. Grayson wasn’t the first man to ever show interest in her, but there was a reason she wasn’t already in a relationship. She just didn’t have the time or emotional bandwidth to deal with one. She needed to focus on her fledgling business, and now, raising a child. Possibly alone.
But part of her yearned for Grayson. Had yearned for him from the moment she saw him. And it was frustrating that she couldn’t talk herself out of it.
“I don’t know,” Mila finally said. “I’d have to get to know him better. It would depend on what he thinks about family, and raising our child, and—”
“Right. But how do you feel around him?”
The breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding flowed out of her. “I feel great. Honestly. He’s a stranger, technically, yet I feel like I’ve known him for years.”
Lainey nodded. “That’s good. Because something might happen, and I don’t want you to rule it out or shut the door on the possibility. But on the other hand, you need to be prepared if he only wants to pay child support.”
“Exactly.” The thought was foreign to her. Why wouldn’t Grayson want to be involved in his child’s life? Unless he was just the anti-family man. Maybe he’d never imagined having kids, or simply envisioned his life to revolve around his business.
Still, it brought up so many questions. Did he want shared custody? What about holidays? Did he even want to meet his kid? What about prenatal visits to the doctor—would he go with her? Did he want her to give him copies of sonogram pictures? Had he ever thought about names? The questions were driving her crazy. Almost as much as being forced to wait to have answers to them.
“You’ll be supporting this baby, no matter what,” Lainey went on. “So it’s best for you to plan around what you want. Then, you can figure out alternatives. Based on whether he stays or not.”
“Yes. That’s what I’ll do,” Mila said, squeezing her hands around her decaf tea. “Because failure is no longer an option here.”
“It certainly is not.”
Because the truth, at the bottom of it all, was that she was going to have to prepare to be a single mother. Grayson might make good on his financial assistance promise—or not. But either way, Mila needed to be prepared to do all of this on her own. And that meant she needed to focus on growing her business as much as she could before the baby got here. That would be the only buoy she had in the wild sea of new motherhood. And part of her didn’t even want to accept money from Grayson. If anything, she wanted a commitment from him. To actually love their unborn child.
Because that was the most important thing. Love.
She already knew this baby wouldn’t suffer from a lack of love from her. No, Mila planned to make sure—no matter what happened—that this baby had the best life possible.
Mama just needed to get her ducks in a row first.
“This is exciting, Mila,” Lainey went on, nudging her after they’d strolled past the dragon hedge, and all the illuminating bamboo behind it. “I know you’re going to knock motherhood out of the park. And I’ll always be here for you. At your side. Begging you to let me buy just one more outfit for the baby.”
Mila laughed. “Yeah? I’m glad you believe in me.”
“More than that. You won’t just be an awesome mom, you’re going to do the whole thing with style and grace. Momtrepreneur—that’s the word!”
Mila couldn’t fight the grin. The word had a certain ring to it. “I’ll certainly try.”
Lainey wrapped her arm around Mila’s shoulders. “There is no try. It’s already happening. Because I know you.”
Mila snorted. “That sounds a little bit like Yoda to me.”
But her friend’s endless optimism was exactly what she needed to hear, especially now in this time of flux and anxiety. If anything, Lainey’s confidence in her reminded Mila that she was more than capable of handling this on her own.
She just wasn’t sure if she wanted to do it on her own. And yet on the other hand, did she really want to be with someone like Grayson? She barely knew who he was. Maybe they could never be anything more than distant co-parents.
One thing was for certain. She wanted to learn more about Grayson. At least for research purposes, so she could figure out her options. Even though her heart thumped a little harder and parts of her body went weak from wanting him whenever he was around…she deserved to know him better. At least so she could make a better-informed decision when it came to their unborn baby’s future.
Now that the baby news was out of the bag, she had no idea what to expect from him once the next challenge rolled around.
As for Mila, she could hardly wait until their paths crossed again. Only this time, she wasn’t sure if it was so that they could talk more about the future…or to satiate that restless desire inside her.
The one that only wanted more Grayson, all the time.
11
Hours chugged forward, turning into days. The last three days until the second challenge felt like weeks.
After this evening, they’d be two thirds of the way done. Tonight’s challenge took place at the horse race, which was a type of event that Mila had never attended. She’d researched as carefully as she could, examining photos from other races and trying to get a sense of what would stand out and fit in all at once. She’d felt good about the outfit she’d chosen for Grayson…but the app’s selection had won out in the end. And while her choice had gotten plenty of votes, it had rattled her confidence in her own choice of wardrobe for the event. Still, it was too late to pull something new together now.
She got lost in doing her hair and makeup as she readied herself for the event. By the time Grayson showed up, she was putting the finishing touches on her pastel eyeshadow to match the mint and white floral dress. When she pulled open the front door to greet him, he was shining in the dapper spring outfit that the app and the online community had chosen for his look tonight—chinos and a lightweight seersucker.
“I have to admit, you look good!” she gushed. She’d been filled with worry about whether or not their first time seeing each other again since the news might be awkward. But all of her fears vanished the second she saw him. His grin was as easy and relaxed as ever.
“Back a
tcha,” Grayson said, his gaze traveling down her body. “You somehow make the hat look amazing.”
She snorted, swatting at his chest. Hats were apparently a must for this type of event, and she’d chosen an elaborate black and white spiral hat with a spray of flowers on the rim.
“I’m all ready,” she said, reaching for her handbag by the door. “Time to lose all my money betting on the wrong horse.”
“Don’t worry,” Grayson said, offering his arm as they walked down the hall and out of the apartment building to the waiting stretch limo. “I have some insider tips. I won’t steer you wrong.”
“Oh, you do? So you’re not only a tech darling, you’re also a gambling guru.”
“Among other things,” Grayson said enigmatically, waggling his eyebrows at her. She giggled, swatting his chest again. They were already looking and acting the part of the perfect society couple. Maybe that was partially inspired by the clothes, but it was practically second nature around Grayson. No matter what they were wearing. No matter the event. No matter the life-changing surprise growing in her belly.
Grayson held the back door of the limo open for her, and she slid into the cool, plush interior. The leather seats were so soft they were buttery, and a minibar was illuminated in the side wall of the car…stocked fully with sparkling water and Sprite.
“I didn’t know what you might want to drink, or how you were feeling,” he admitted once he’d climbed into the car and they were in motion. “But I know my friend’s mom always drank Sprite when she had morning sickness. But we can toast the event with sparkling water regardless.”
She laughed, feeling an uncharacteristic swell of emotion inside her—the sort of thing she had been feeling more and more over the past couple weeks. It made it hard to keep herself grounded, and part of her wondered if this wasn’t the beginning of the emotional rollercoaster of pregnancy. It would explain why her mind kept going to thoughts of being Grayson’s girlfriend. Fantasizing starting a little family with him, even though that should have been the furthest thing from her mind, given everything else that was weighing on it.
“That’s really sweet,” she said, covering his hand with hers. So he was still thinking about the pregnancy. Not acting like it was just a blip that didn’t exist. That, in and of itself, seemed promising.
And even though she’d spent the last few days worrying and wondering what being around him now might feel like…all of those anxieties had evaporated the second she saw him. She actually felt a little silly for having worried. From the first moment she’d met him, there had been nothing but ease between them. And shockingly, Mila didn’t want to disturb that by bringing up her questions and what-ifs. She just wanted to bask in this feeling of everything being right, just as it was.
It was like a gift that Grayson didn’t even know he was giving her.
The car ride to the racetrack was quick and full of laughter. Once they arrived to the bustling venue on the outskirts of town, Grayson helped her navigate the sea of people as they went through the VIP ticket line and headed toward a cordoned off area high above the racetrack. Mila couldn’t help but stop every once in a while and take it all in. With all the fascinating headgear and pastel outfits surrounding them, it was easy to forget that the whole point of this evening was the race and not the clothing.
Grayson had brought them into a fancy VIP area with a stunning panoramic view of the racetrack…and all the people in the regular grandstands who wouldn’t be joining them up here. The outfits in this huge, wood-floored room were on a different level than the ones Mila had seen below. Up here, the hats stretched wider, jawlines tilted higher, facial expressions were more shellacked.
“Old money up here,” Grayson murmured into her ear as they headed for a line of plush seats near the glass windows facing the track.
“I could hardly tell,” Mila joked as they eased to sitting.
“The crew should be here soon,” Grayson said, checking his watch. “But until then, we can do whatever we want.”
“I want to bet on one horse,” Mila stated. “Just one. To say I did it.”
“We can do that.” Grayson reached for her hand, swiping his thumb over her knuckles. The small gesture sent warmth curling through her. It was broken when voices from a nearby conversation cut into her awareness. Three men stood at the end of the row of armchairs, laughing raucously about something. One of them lit a cigar.
Grayson acted before Mila could even process what was happening. “Hey. Excuse me. Could you not smoke that in here?”
The man faced Grayson entirely, revealing his puffy cheeks and narrowed eyes. He took a few steps closer to them, sucking on his cigar to allow it to light properly.
“Beg your pardon?”
“I asked if you could not smoke that in here. We’re closed in. It’s not healthy.”
The man laughed, but it sounded harsh and humorless. He sat in the armchair facing theirs and crossed an ankle over one knee. “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”
Mila didn’t need to be part of this level of society to catch the acidic undertones behind the politeness. She rolled her lips inward, trying to ignore the hideous cigar smell.
“Grayson Finlay.”
“And what brings you to our neck of the woods today?” Another puff. “Sightseeing? Did you win a VIP ticket in a raffle?”
One of the man’s friends came over then, clapping his shoulder. “John. Making new friends?”
“Oh, yes. New friends.” John sent them a painfully plastic smile. “Grayson Finlay and…”
Grayson squeezed her hand. “My girlfriend, Mila Tomlinson.”
Mila’s throat went tight. She supposed he had to introduce her that way—it would be too awkward to explain the parameters of their actual relationship—but she couldn’t help but notice that the words on his lips had sounded so good. Maybe the G-word was another thing they could put a pin in, for later.
“Grayson and Mila.” John lifted his glass, and then tipped some of the amber liquid into his mouth. “I’ll have to remember to look you up. Mr. Finlay, when did your family get its start? In the late 1800s, like mine?”
Mila’s stomach shrank. The veiled insults weren’t so veiled anymore.
“Can’t be,” John’s friend said, sniffing. “Never seen him in the circuit before.”
“New money,” the third friend said quietly, almost like it was a dirty secret.
“I’m the founder of a tech enterprise that’s preparing for its IPO next month,” Grayson said, his tone clipped.
“Tech company, huh.” John smirked, like this was the most quaint, ridiculous thing Grayson could have said. “I knew a few guys in tech startups. Dave, you remember that Terrance kid? Didn’t he have a startup?”
“Went bankrupt before the end of his first fiscal year,” Dave responded before sipping at his drink.
“It’s easy money, until it all disappears,” the third friend commented. “Tech bubbles are good for that.”
“Well, honey, you should be glad that your business is celebrating its fourth year of staggering profits,” Mila jumped in, patting Grayson’s hand. She wasn’t sure what it was that inspired her to join in: the way these men were slowly getting snarkier, or the paleness in Grayson’s face that seemed to indicate how deeply this was upsetting him. And it wasn’t like she was lying. She wasn’t sure what kind of profits qualified as staggering exactly, but she’d done enough research into Grayson to know that Finlay Technology was celebrating its fourth very successful birthday this year.
“Staggering by whose definition?” John asked, which caused his two friends to snicker. Something inside Mila snapped, and she couldn’t stand it anymore. These smarmy assholes, who had probably spent a lifetime of getting away with everything scot-free, deserved to be put in their place a little bit.
“By the only person whose opinion matters even a little—the opinion of his partner and the mother of his unborn child,” Mila snapped, hissing out the words as she struggl
ed to keep her voice low. She wanted to yell at these bastards and let everyone see what jerks they were—but announcing her pregnancy in a room full of society types, including writers for the society papers, seemed like the opposite of putting a pin in the pregnancy for now. “So put out that damn cigar or I’ll be happy to raise a fucking stink with the staff of this racetrack about how you’re smoking out a pregnant lady in the VIP lounge.”
Grayson’s cool, collected smile returned then, and he brought the back of Mila’s hand to his lips. “Well said, honey.”
John and his holier-than-thou friends wandered away then, and the cigar smell disappeared soon thereafter. Grayson leaned in, pressing his forehead to hers.
“I didn’t want to out you about the pregnancy,” he whispered. “I didn’t feel right, but if I’d known—”
“It’s fine,” she said, surprised he wasn’t upset with her over dropping the p-bomb. “They were the hugest assholes I’ve seen in a long time, and I couldn’t pass up the chance to use my trump card.”
Grayson looked into her eyes, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Then he brushed his lips against hers in an unexpectedly tender kiss.
“Thank you,” he whispered.
“For what?”
“For defending me. That kind of guy just gets under my skin—always has. In fact, I created this app in an attempt to help people deal with stuffed shirts like them. People of limited means might feel like they don’t know what to wear to fancy events, but with the app to help them, they won’t feel so out of place.”
This little confession made her mouth part. She had no idea there was such a backstory to his technology. And maybe that was her fault for not inquiring more deeply. But this was exactly the sort of thing she wanted to know about him. Was desperate to know about him.
“That’s very noble, and lovely,” she said, their mouths still inches away. This was the best intimate conversation of her life, and she didn’t want it to end. “But why do you feel so strongly about that?”