Queen of Quarantine

by Caroline Peckham

  Something in my soul expanded as he shifted and made little noises, his mouth opening and closing like he was hoping for some more milk and I bounced him just a bit to settle him down.

  I turned away from the watching eyes of the others and walked towards the window, moving so that the soft sunlight spilled down on us and stealing a moment alone with our son as my heart swelled with emotion and love and everything just kinda shifted in my mind.

  "Hello, little hell bringer," I murmured, stroking that soft hair and watching as he cracked his eyes open. I knew he couldn't really see me properly yet, but as I looked into those familiarly blue eyes and he wrapped his tiny hand around my thumb, I knew that I would tear the world apart for him. He was something utterly pure, untouched and more loved than he could possibly comprehend yet.

  But he would come to. I'd been worried about the fate of a baby who was raised by monsters before this moment, but as I looked down at our boy with his warm, brown skin and the cutest fucking button nose I'd ever seen, I knew that was so stupid of me. He'd just been born into a family without limits or boundaries who could offer him the world and protect him from the dark. He would know more love than he could cope with and be strong and powerful in all the ways that counted.

  We might have been a bit fucked up, but that was okay. Because our form of chaos was the very best kind. And we were about to embark upon the greatest adventure we'd ever known.

  "You see that out there?" I asked Caesar as he just kept looking at me. "That's the world you were born to rule. You'll grow and flourish and learn to master it. You'll be a king among the masses. Don't you worry, my boy. You're going to be a damn natural. And if anything ever tries to hurt you, you'll have a pack of monsters at your back. What better life could there be for you than that?"

  AAAAAND ANOTHER FIVE YEARS LATER

  “C aesar Donavan Rivers!” I shouted as my little monster of a five-year-old pushed his younger brother into the sea and sat on him. “Kyan!” I called in desperation as I stood up with Beau clutched to my breast as he fed. The blanket covering him flew off in the wind, exposing my other boob to the world. Thankfully, the rest of the party guests hadn’t arrived so it was just my children and my husband I was flashing right now.

  Chaos. My life was chaos. And it was fucking beautiful.

  Kyan charged away from the buffet table with a cocktail sausage in his mouth, the poor guy only having looked away for ten seconds to feed himself, but those ten seconds had been too long. Because Caesar could go rogue in under three.

  Kyan scooped the two boys into the air, Caesar by his leg, and he crushed Rowan to his chest as he checked he was okay. The kid laughed his head off as he soaked his Pa’s nice blue shirt and got it all sandy too. He was as hardy as his tattooed daddy that one. Rowan had taken a full on punch right in the face from Caesar the other day and started laughing. It was kinda scary how thick Kyan’s blood ran in his veins. He was only three and he was already giving Caesar a run for his money.

  I sighed my relief, dropping back into my deck chair under the shade of the parasol just as Blake came running out of the house. “Everything okay? Oh shit, you know your tit’s out, right sweetheart?” He moved to stand before me and I gazed up at him with a grin.

  “I’m aware, golden boy,” I purred and he gazed at my exposed breast for a long moment before leaning down to kiss his son’s raven hair.

  “Is it weird to be jealous of my own kid?” he murmured as he lifted his head to kiss me too.

  “Weird is kinda our middle name so I wouldn’t worry about it.” I smirked and he headed off to chase down Beau’s blanket.

  Kyan placed Caesar down in the sand by the buffet table and pointed at him. “Five minutes in the naughty corner, hell bringer.”

  “That’s not fair!” Caesar yelled, slamming his fists down into the sand in fury.

  “You nearly drowned Rowan, it’s perfectly fucking fair,” Kyan warned and Caesar gasped dramatically.

  “Pa swore!” He pointed accusingly, looking to me for justice. And I’d sure as shit bring it.

  “Well you’d better join Caesar in the naughty corner then, Kyan,” I said with a grin playing around my lips as Blake reappeared with my runaway blanket, draping it over me and I tucked it around Beau as I cuddled him closer. The kid loved his food as much as Blake did. He wouldn’t have unlatched from my breast if that blanket had flown away mid snowstorm. I wouldn’t have bothered with it at all only that Cooper was going to arrive any minute and he always used the side gate since Blake had given him the code. I didn’t wanna flash him my boob; that was no kind of greeting for my father-in-law and his new wife.

  Blake sat down in the deck chair beside me, pushing his fingers into his dark hair and flexing those glorious muscles of his. He looked a little tired considering he’d been up a few times in the night. Since the very first day we’d brought Caesar home, my boys had helped in any way they could with the night shifts, feeding our babies my expressed milk and rocking them down when they wouldn’t settle. Saint had devised a rota which meant that the five of us all got plenty of sleep and no one got too exhausted. When we’d first arrived home from the hospital with Caesar five years ago, I had never in all my life been so happy for his organisational skills. Or the willingness of my boys to do any and everything they could to keep both me and our baby content. And they’d never complained a single day about it since.

  Kyan placed Rowan in Blake’s lap before heading over to sit beside Caesar in the sand, my husband’s clothes officially ruined for the party. But as he pulled his shirt off and the sun gleamed on his inked skin, I didn’t think that was such a bad thing. And I wasn’t even gonna bother getting the kids changed as they were only in beachwear anyway.

  “Now why did you try to drown your brother?” Kyan asked Caesar in a growl.

  Caesar gave him an indignant look worthy of Saint. “He was a shark. I had to kill him before he ate mommy.”

  “Shark, shark!” Rowan grinned as Blake bounced him on his knees, apparently agreeing with Caesar’s story.

  “You can’t kill sharks,” Kyan warned and Caesar rolled his freaking eyes.

  “He’s not really a shark, Pa,” Caesar said like Kyan was the one who believed he was. “And what if a real shark did try to eat mommy? Can I kill one then?”

  Kyan considered that with a frown and I smothered a laugh as I watched, waiting for his answer.

  “Well your daddies will do that,” Kyan decided.

  “What if none of you are there?” Caesar tossed back. He had an answer for everything, just like his Papa. “I’m the oldest. I should kill the shark if none of you are there.”

  “No, because then your mommy will kill it. She’s a savage.” He threw me a dark grin and I bit my lip.

  “Well what if the shark has tied mommy up?” Caesar pressed. “And what if his shark friends have got my brothers? Am I not allowed to kill sharks then?”

  “That’s a tough one, brother,” Blake sniggered before blowing a raspberry on Rowan’s neck and making him giggle wildly.

  Kyan considered that then sighed, scruffing Caesar’s hair. “Fine, then you can kill a shark.”

  “Yay!” Caesar jumped up and Kyan caught him by the back of his shirt, yanking him back down into the sand before he could escape.

  “One more minute. And you need to apologise to Rowan too,” Kyan said sternly, that fierce expression of his making me all tingly inside.

  Caesar groaned, throwing himself down in the sand. I reckoned our family photo was gonna be interesting today. I didn’t think we had a single one where we all looked presentable. Saint hated that, but I freaking loved it. My children looked wild like the wolf pups they were. And I couldn’t be prouder.

  Beau fell asleep and I pulled the blanket off of him, placing him in his cot which set up in the shade beside me and finding my dress was now wet with milk.

  “Dammit,” I muttered, trying to wipe it off but it was no good. “I’d better change.”

&
nbsp; Blake nodded as I got up. “Fetch the birthday boy while you’re at it.” He pinched my ass as I walked past him and Rowan reached out to try and do the same.

  “You’re teaching him bad habits,” I sang and Blake grinned, leaning down to talk in his ear.

  “Lemme teach you about a little word called consent…” Blake whispered.

  Rowan threw his head forward and headbutted him in the face and I snorted a laugh as I left him to deal with that drama, walking into The Temple through the wide open glass doors.

  I jogged upstairs and grabbed a white sundress, exchanging it for my ruined blue one before heading back down to the kitchen. The sound of the front door opening made my heart leap and I jogged along the hall. The tinkling of Saint’s piano carried to me from his music room, the beautiful piece filling the house.

  I made it to the front hall just as Nash stepped inside with MJ in his arms looking like a mini version of me and him. He had bright blonde hair and blue eyes which shone like sapphires, his skin a deep golden colour. I ran forward to hug Nash and my little two-year-old, squeezing them tight and kissing my husband on the lips.

  “Kees, kees, mommy,” MJ begged too and I leaned down to kiss his chubby little cheek.

  “Hey baby, did you have fun with Dad?” I asked then looked to Nash when he nodded. “Was he good?”

  “Well…he begged for an ice cream so we grabbed one from the surf and turf, then he ate it too fast and threw up everywhere.”

  I laughed, looking to MJ who grinned cheekily. “Oh no.”

  “Yeah, I had to do an outfit change in the trunk of the car then the little guy almost pissed on me, but I swerved so he pissed on a woman’s shorts who was passing by instead. She didn’t notice so…I’m calling it a win.” He smirked and I kissed him again as I laughed.

  “Sounds like a success to me.” I grinned.

  “Yeah and wait until you see the cake, princess.” He lifted the paper bag in his hand with a grin and I bounced on my toes excitedly.

  “He’s gonna freak, isn’t he?”

  “Yeah, it’s the best one yet. We’d better wear some of Blake’s football gear when we show him.”

  We headed through to the kitchen and I pulled MJ into my arms as Nash took the cake out of the bag and placed it on the white marble counter. It was a huge red squid, each layer of the cake covered in iced tentacles that looked pretty damn realistic. Across the bottom of it were the words Happy Birthday Squid.

  I roared a laugh and MJ giggled too, pointing at the cake. “Skid!”

  “No, MJ. That’s Papa,” Nash corrected with a wicked grin.

  “Papa,” MJ corrected, giggling again.

  It was the cutest damn sound. It almost made me broody for another one. But then I remembered that giving birth was an utter bitch and I’d sworn not to forget that again. Four was enough. Four boys of course because what this house had needed was more testosterone – not that I would have wanted it any other way.

  Somehow the memories of labour seemed to fade each time until I was tempted to do it all over again. It was like there was a fertile little witch living in my head casting spells on my mind to make me think labour might just be bearable the next time. If I did get pregnant again, I was absolutely having a C-section. But I wasn’t going to do it again anyway so that was irrelevant. We had four beautiful children and that was plenty to fill my heart to the brim.

  “You’d better hide it, I’m gonna go and get Saint,” I said with a smile. We’d banished him to his music room while we set up the party and he was more than happy to comply. He’d probably have stayed in there all day if I didn’t fetch him. He was about as keen on us making a fuss over him as he was about poor grammar. But I just pulled the ‘kids love a birthday party’ line on him and he had no choice but to accept it.

  Nash put the cake in the fridge and I placed MJ down so he could toddle after him outside. I jogged away through the halls and made it to Saint’s music room, listening to him play as I waited for a lull before I disturbed him. I knew he wouldn’t mind me walking in, but I also loved to bathe in the pure peace of his music, knowing he was lost to its embrace.

  The music stopped and his voice rang through the room. “I know you’re there, siren. Don’t keep me in suspense.”

  I released a breath of amusement, pushing through the door and stepping into the beautiful room. He’d drawn the black-out curtains and a single candle was lit up on top of his piano, our black cat Debussy just a shadow beside it, her eyes shimmering like a demon’s. She mewed in greeting as Saint turned to me and patted his knee. Besides Saint, I was the only other one of this household she tolerated and I guessed that was because us girls had to stick together. Although I was pretty sure she’d steal my devil boy from me in a heartbeat if she got the chance. The girl was smitten since she’d shown up on our porch and Saint had taken her in, and I guessed I couldn’t really blame her.

  “Shut the door and come here,” he commanded.

  “But everyone’s waiting for you to join the party,” I said teasingly and he groaned.

  “Yes, I am well aware. Now do as I ask. It’s my birthday after all.”

  I kicked the door shut with a smirk, moving over to perch on his knee and his hand skimmed up my thigh as he leaned into my neck and breathed in deeply.

  “You are looking edible as always.” He kissed the soft spot behind my ear, tucking my hair away to give him more access as he nibbled along my flesh.

  “Come and join us outside,” I urged.

  “Are you all going to make a spectacle of me?” he asked, tilting my head around to steal a kiss.

  “Yes,” I purred, running my hand down his black shirt to feel his heart beating powerfully under my palm.

  “I detest fuss,” he said and I laughed.

  “You don’t seem to mind it so much when I fuss over you.” I ran my hand lower and he chuckled darkly before capturing my wrist.

  “Well you are the exception to every rule I have ever lived by, siren, so that does not surprise me.”

  My heart fluttered as Saint’s fingers moved further up my thigh but Debussy jumped on my lap right on top of his hand and nuzzled her head into his chin.

  “Pussy blocker,” I laughed, stroking her and she mewed innocently. “She wants you to herself.”

  “Well the chances of a cat killing you are low, Tatum, but never impossible,” he said with a smirk then tilted Debussy’s chin up to look at him. “If you must murder someone, make it that nosy neighbour along the street who always stares at our girl.”

  “Mr Newton is in his nineties,” I laughed.

  “Then no one will suspect a thing when he dies in his sleep,” Saint said and I smacked his arm.

  “You’re the Devil,” I breathed.

  “In the flesh,” he agreed, flashing me his teeth in the dark.

  A pounding of little footsteps pattered this way and the door swung open, revealing Caesar there, looking like the embodiment of mischief.

  “Caesar!” Kyan’s booming voice sounded through the house. “You’re in trouble when I find you.”

  “Uh-oh, what did you do?” I asked as he scampered forward and crawled under the piano.

  “Shh, mom,” he whispered.

  “Caesar?” Kyan growled, his footsteps pounding in this direction.

  I opened my mouth to call out to him then Saint’s hand closed over it to silence me. The door kicked open a second later and Kyan folded his arms as he stood in the doorway, arching a brow at us.

  “Yes?” Saint inquired, his hand sliding from my mouth as he pulled me tighter against him.

  For someone who liked keeping order, he sure didn’t do it with his kids. I was pretty certain he thrived on the carnage in this house when the kids were running wild. I kinda did too.

  “Have you seen Caesar?” Kyan asked, his eyes shifting to the piano where a smothered laugh sounded from beneath it.

  “No,” Saint said simply and I snorted a laugh.

  “What did he do
?” I asked, because if Caesar had been really bad, I was gonna have to hand him over to Sheriff Kyan for another punishment.

  “Rowan slapped him with a bag of frozen peas and Caesar drop kicked him. It was kind of impressive if it hadn’t been such a dick thing to do,” Kyan said with a snigger.

  “It was a bag of frozen beans, Pa,” Caesar’s voice came from under the piano in annoyance and Kyan ducked down, hauling him out with a chuckle of triumph. He started tickling him as he fought to escape and Caesar’s laughter filled every corner of the room, making my heart expand.

  “Seems like tit for tat to me,” Saint commented as I dropped out of his lap, kneeling down to tickle Caesar too.

  “Rowan hit his head when he fell. I mean, he took it like a fucking warrior but still,” Kyan growled.

  “Pa swore again!” Caesar cried and I turned on Kyan, tickling him instead. Caesar laughed wildly, jumping up to help me as Kyan fell down beneath us. Saint was suddenly above his head, yanking his arms up so we could tickle him more easily.

  “Alright, alright,” Kyan choked out as we showed him no mercy, but we didn’t stop.

  He yanked a wrist free of Saint’s hold and suddenly he was free. Caesar caught my hand to tow me out of the room to safety and I laughed as I chased after him.

  We ran down the hall with Saint behind us but just as we made it to the kitchen, a huge thump sounded followed by Saint cursing. I twisted around, finding Kyan on top of Saint on the floor, wrestling him down and planting a wet kiss on his mouth.

  “Oh for fox sake, Kyan,” Saint spat, keeping to his no swearing rule in front of the kids even now which was just too cute.

  “Happy birthday, brother.” Kyan grinned.

  “You heathen, you’re not even wearing a shirt. What kind of hillbilly event is this?”

  Kyan laughed as he got up, pulling Saint after him and clapping him on the shoulder. Rowan came running in from the beach suddenly with a stick, his hazel hair sticking up in every direction as he charged down Caesar with a roar.

  “Woah, woah!” I scooped Rowan off the ground, wrestling the stick from his surprisingly strong grasp before he could spear his brother on it.