Mo was typing madly on his keyboard as Rocky surveyed his checklist. ‘Oh, darn! They’ve left the last hatch open. Get someone to close it!’
Stephen gave the order. ‘Astronaut Bheki, close the hatch, then return to your seat! Check.’ There was silence.
‘Astronaut Bheki, are you deaf or something? Close the hatch! Check.’
Once again Yasmin sidled up to Stephen and had a word in his ear.
‘Sorry, sorry, I forgot. Astronaut Enza, will you please close the hatch?’
‘Which hatch, Houston? Check,’ Enza replied, looking around the cabin with sugar-coated innocence. Bheki winked at her. He could sometimes choose not to hear.
Stephen, who would never have made a hardened teacher, was fuming. He stood with hands on his hips in a double ‘teapot’ as the screen focused on Enza.
‘That darned hatch, the one you just came through! Check.’
The farcical nature of the proceedings was now spreading like wildfire in the alternative universe of social media. The ‘Alumni’ pages were brimming with videos of Stephen as he lost his cool and berated the children. Out there on the World Wide Web a worm was starting to turn.
Enza, like a gymnast in slow motion, pirouetted down the tube and then inch by inch secured the hatch. She beamed at the camera as she carefully and slowly re-did her strappings. Mo with a flourish on the keyboard completed the reprogramming of the mission’s computer software. He flashed the universal thumbs-up and Xing surreptitiously reached up and toggled the override switches yet again.
Rocky was unaware of her actions. He shrugged his shoulders ruefully as he reflected on the last two years going down a long fiery drain. ‘Ready, sir,’ he announced in weary resignation, and then on Stephen’s behest pressed the command buttons that would jettison the descent module from the rest of the spacecraft. Nothing happened. Rocky pressed again. Nothing. He then noticed the override had been triggered.
‘Pesky kids,’ he snorted and tried to take control. The computer asked him for a password. ‘They’ve blocked me out! Little SOBs!’
Mo had successfully delved into the software and inserted Elin’s favourite password, ‘Eyjafjallajökull’. Mo signed to Buzz and Xing,
‘Yes!’ they fervently signed back.
It was now a race against time. The ‘big burn’, as they called it, was what would blast them out of Earth’s orbit on their journey to Mars. It would accelerate them from their already brisk 15,000 miles per hour to 35,000 in a few minutes. That’s fast – faster than any humans have ever travelled. To initiate the ‘big burn’, the engines needed priming and the systems shut down in the quarters. Mo, Buzz and Xing would have to work together in record time and without the help of any ground technicians. They knew what to do – they’d practised it enough times – but this was the real thing and under pressure.
On the ground the technicians were crazily trying the obvious passwords. They tried a program that would crunch them, but to no avail. Rocky forced himself into Mo’s position. ‘What password would I use under pressure?’
It was obvious – a familiar one, he delved in the database and found Mo’s records. His cellphone password was deceptively easy: ‘Innit’. ‘Try “Innit”!’ Rocky called over. They entered the text and the words ‘password incorrect’ sprang up. Stephen was looking over the shoulders of the guys. ‘I saw that little ice maiden whisper to him! Find hers!’
Back in the capsule the feverish toil had abated. They couldn’t believe it; they were ready to go! With great care and comradeship, they checked each other’s straps and dimmed the lights. All Buzz needed to do was press the middle button on his trusty hand control.
Back on the ground, Elin’s files had been searched and the illusive phone code was discovered. ‘Eyjafjallajökull – found it!’ shouted Rocky.
‘OK, what is it?’ was the impatient reply from the flight controller.
Unfortunately, no one could pronounce it. Letter by letter he shouted it out: ‘E y j a f j…’
Buzz was suddenly consumed by nerves and doubt. The words ‘on the orders of the new president herself!’ were drumming in his ears. He had been defiant before, but only with his ma. This was the President of the United States! No standing in the corner or being grounded in his room – this was serious! His finger hovered over the switch, willing himself to push it, but his body was frozen with fear.
Houston was almost there; the last letters were being entered to override the children’s control. ‘… l a j… Christ, where’s the key for the ö?’ Rocky fiddled around with the keyboard settings.
‘The Other Things’ watched in alarm as Buzz dithered. ‘I can’t do it! I wanna, I wanna… I wanna go home!’ he sobbed.
The small hand of the little African boy stretched over. ‘I’m not going home, my friend!’ he said, and struck the button.
The ignitions sparked and arced and 48,000 kilonewtons of thrust hit them like a crashing truck. Pinned to their seats, eyes bulging and skin stretching, immobilised by the crushing acceleration, there was only one thought on the minds of the six children.
‘Here we, here we, here we goooooooo!’
Escape from Earth
Acknowledgements
This book started on a long drive to Cornwall. Despite the roar of the VW camper engine, I listened intently to a report about two planned missions to Mars. One was to send an elderly couple to loop around the planet and return and the other was to send a group of volunteers on a one-way mission to establish a colony.
The first mission included an older couple because they would be less affected by the prolonged radiation exposure of deep space, but did not include landing on the planet because of the difficulty of returning. The second mission sidestepped that issue by leaving a larger crew there forever. Neither of these options seemed great!
As a natural problem solver, my mind worked on how one might plan a successful return mission. Obviously the payload or weight posed real issues in getting back off the surface, so why not choose the lightest crew possible? An average American man or woman weighs more or less the equivalent of three nine-year-old children. Why not send kids? In addition young kids have a vigorous immune system and their growth plates are still functioning, so they may be better suited than most to weather the journey. I thought it would make a great film!
I met script writer Kirsty McNeil at a party. She thought the idea had potential and encouraged me to develop it. Not used to writing, I used storyboard techniques to develop the plot and when it was finished Kirsty suggested we next develop the characters. She also proposed to write it as a novel rather than a film script. Without her inspiration or assistance, this novel would never have been written.
I continued with the storyboard method to help with the writing and sketched out many of the scenes. I’m an architect and visual person and am more comfortable with drawing on a blank sheet of paper than writing on it! This is how it became an illustrated novel.
My partner Kathryn McAdam Freud has encouraged me from the start and, as willing victim, listened to the whole novel – read in its rawest state! Our kids (we have three each and have adopted three) have given us a constant youthful presence for the last twenty-nine years, and more than an insight into children’s behaviour. They are Samuel, Adam (scientific advisor), Owen (early reader), Nathan, Eva, Kayd (Unbound video maker) and Samantha (cameo actor), Luke and Emerald (star of video and reader), and have been a wonderful source of enthusiasm and encouragement for the project.
Many friends have helped on the way to publication and I’d particularly like to thank Dom Welby, Rima Boz, Ruky South and Nigel Draube for their initial readings and suggestions; Botts for the idea of ‘The Museum of Practical Jokes’ and generous sponsorship; Dr Jim Rice for his technical input and interest; and especially Bernadette Sheehan and Janet Chequers for their reading, criticisms and initial editing.
Through Kwaku’s stewardship, my friends and family and even the odd stranger have been amazing in their spons
orship of the publication process and enabled Unbound’s designers and editors to work with me to bring you the finished novel. I’d like to thank Josephine, Xander, Annabel, Kate, Petra, Julia, Sara and Mark at Unbound.
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The Other Things Page 38