by Dara Girard
“Hmm.”
“When are you going to tell her?”
“I told you I left a message. I’ll tell her soon.”
“I want to believe you.”
“But you don’t?”
“Only because I still know so little about you.”
Anna Marie scratched the back of her hand, annoyed. “What do you need to know?”
“What song did you like as a child? What was your mother like? Where was your first foster home? Do you have a hobby?”
“Oh, I get it. Your father has cast some doubts about me. No wonder he liked Tracie. Her life was an open book and pleasant to listen to. Something so happy and great. No wonder she likes talking about it all the time. Unfortunately, I don’t. I want to forget mine.”
“Why? Your experiences, whether good or bad, make you who you are. I want to know what you like, what you dislike. If you ever have nightmares. What you’re afraid of. I want to know everything I can about you.”
Anna Marie stood, eager to end the conversation. “I’m thirsty. Are you? I can go get us something.”
Desmond stared up at her, his expression grim. “If this is just a game to you, then let’s stop it now.”
“Break up?” her voice cracked.
“Yes. I’m too old for flashy relationships that don’t mean anything. I’ve had them and I’m over them. I want a real woman and I want a real relationship. And that means honesty. That means telling Tracie the truth. That means letting me know more about you. But if that’s not what you want, tell me now.”
Anna Marie folded her arms, wishing she could, but knowing it was too dangerous. She never revealed specifics of her past. Why did he need to know all that stuff? It was something she couldn’t give him. Anna Marie hung her head in defeat.
He stood. “Fine.”
She heard the finality of his words and then his footsteps against the gravel drive. Within minutes he would be gone and she’d never see him again. And for the first time in her life, she fought her fear of judgment and called out to him. “‘One Thousand and One Nights.’”
He turned around. “What?”
“‘One Thousand and One Nights.’ That was one of my favorite stories growing up.”
He walked toward her and Anna Marie gripped the railing to maintain her strength. “I once had this illustrated edition I got from a used bookstore and I would imagine myself as one of the characters in the many tales of fantasy. I would close my eyes and ride the magic carpet and dream of the wishes I would tell a genie if I had one. It was my favorite book.”
Desmond stopped in front of her. “What happened to it?”
“My book?”
He nodded.
Anna Marie swallowed. “I don’t remember.”
He covered her hand with his and said in a soft voice, “Yes, you do.”
She stared down at their hands, feeling his warmth and caring. “It got burned,” she said in a flat voice.
“How?”
Anna Marie looked at him. “My foster father threw it in the fireplace. He wasn’t an awful man and I’m sure he didn’t mean to. He didn’t know how much it meant to me. He just saw me reading instead of doing my chores, so he took the book and burned it. I watched as each beautiful page curled and turn black.”
“What did you do after that?”
“I did my chores.” She lightened her voice. “But I survived. Always have.” She shrugged. “So now you know something more about me.”
“Thank you.” He lifted her hand and held it to his chest. “And I’ll make sure you never regret trusting me.”
His fervent words and piercing gaze were too much for her. Too intimate. Too much of a bond that she’d never had with anyone. “Now it’s your turn. There’s something more I want to learn about you.”
“What?”
She lifted his sleeve. “I know you have this tattoo. But I’ve never taken the time to find the other one.”
“Do you want me to tell you?”
She took his hand and walked to the front door. “No, I’d prefer to look for it.”
“It might be hard to find,” he teased.
She opened the door then sent him a seductive glance. “I’m very patient.”
Anna Marie already knew where it was, but enjoyed pretending to find it. Desmond enjoyed it, too, and made an expedition of finding hidden places on her body, also. His tongue caressed her nipples, his hands lightly traced a path over her skin, seeking and finding her pleasure points. His mouth covered hers, slow and hot. He drew away and stared at her in wonder.
“Why?” he asked in a hoarse whisper.
“Why what?”
“Why do you make me feel this way?”
The corner of her mouth kicked up in a coy smile. “Because I’m good?”
Anna Marie expected him to smile at her teasing tone, but he didn’t. Instead his eyes blazed down into hers. “No, there’s something else. With you I feel…” He shook his head, frustrated that he couldn’t find the words. “As though I’m a good person. You never judge me. That’s what I remember most about you. When they handcuffed me, you didn’t look at me with surprise or disappointment or disgust or anything, unlike—”
“Unlike your father?”
“You’d think he’d be happy that my brother and sister are perfect. They’re both married with kids and have good jobs.”
“Are you still practicing because of your father?”
Desmond was silent a moment, then said, “He doesn’t want me to be idle. He thinks having a lawyer in the family is a good thing. That it will keep me responsible.”
“But do you like it?”
“I’d quit it in a minute, but I’ll stay for now.”
“What do you want?”
He grinned and cupped her bottom. “Right now, I have what I want.”
“Be serious.”
He placed a kiss on her shoulder. “I am.”
She teased the nipple on his chest. “What do you want, besides me?”
He covered her hand. “I haven’t thought about it.”
“You should.”
His mouth twitched in amusement. “Dad’s right about you. You’re dangerous. That’s what I like most.”
“And that’s what he worries about most.”
His amusement died. “I didn’t try to get into trouble, but there’s just something in me that rebels.”
“Fortunately, now you’re close with your dad. You have a good relationship.”
“I walk a tightrope and he’s just waiting for me to fall off so he can judge me again.” He rubbed his eyes. “Once he didn’t talk to me for a year.”
Anna Marie heard the pain in Desmond’s voice and sought to offer him comfort. She caressed the side of his face. “He loves you, though.”
“Only because he has to.”
“I don’t.”
“You don’t what?”
“I don’t have to love you, but I do.” She hadn’t meant to tell him, but the remote tone in his voice tore at her. He didn’t speak, and fear swept through her as she remembered the many times she’d gotten too close to someone only to have them reject her. She let her gaze fall, no longer able to look at him, then he touched her side, making her skin tingle. He’d touched her many times before but somehow this was different and he whispered her name in a way she’d never heard before—more intimate—and when he kissed her, she felt as though they were one; that their relationship had changed and deepened.
For the first time, they didn’t have sex, they made love—they went beyond the physical pursuit of pleasure and let their hearts become involved. It made every touch, every look and every kiss more tender. When they were through they lay in bed, surprised by the magnitude of their feelings.
Desmond reached for the phone. “I want you to call Tracie.”
“Now?”
“Yes.”
“I told you I left a message.”
“Leave another one.”
Anna Marie took
the phone from him and dialed. When the voice mail came on, she said, “Tracie, it’s Anna Marie again. Please call me. It’s important.” She handed the phone back to Desmond. “Does that please you?”
“Now call her cell phone.”
“What if she answers?”
“That’s the point, isn’t it? Unless you’ve been calling her house knowing that she usually lets it go to voice mail.”
“That’s not why. Okay?”
He nodded to the phone. “I’m waiting.”
She dialed, then waited, silently praying that the voice mail would kick in. It didn’t.
“Hello?” Tracie said.
“Tracie? It’s Anna Marie. I’ve been trying to reach you.”
“I know. Sorry, I’ve been traveling. Right now I’m in New York.”
“Oh, well, there’s something I need to tell you.”
“Okay, but make it quick. We might lose the connection.”
“I’m seeing Desmond. He’s here with me right now.”
“That’s great. It’s like you’ve read my mind. I’ve been trying to reach him, but he won’t return any of my calls, but he can’t ignore me now. Give him the phone.”
“No, wait. That’s not what I meant.”
“You can explain later. Please let me talk to him before I lose this connection.”
“He’s in my bedroom.”
“I don’t care where he is. Go and get him.”
Anna Marie covered the mouthpiece. “She wants to talk to you.”
“Why?”
“Because she’s been trying to reach you.”
“I know.”
“Please.”
He reluctantly took the receiver. “Did you hear what Anna Marie just told you? We’re seeing…What? Tracie, don’t start that with me.” He briefly closed his eyes and softly swore. “Tracie? Tracie, will you list—I’m trying to—” He turned off the phone and threw it across the room. It hit the far wall and shattered into pieces. Desmond covered his eyes. “I’ll buy you another one.”
Anna Marie kissed his shoulder. “Now you know why I leave messages. It’s almost impossible to get Tracie to listen over the phone.”
He let his hand fall. “I’d forgotten about that.”
“I told you I’d tell her and I will. She’s away right now anyway. I’ll talk to her when she comes back.”
Desmond lay back for a moment, then sniffed the air. “Hmm, something smells good.”
“Probably dinner,” Anna Marie said, recognizing the aromatic result of Leona’s cooking.
“I’ll stay.”
“You haven’t been invited.”
He stood and began to dress. “So invite me.” He pulled on his shirt. “Or I’ll invite myself.”
Anna Marie knew she couldn’t win so she also dressed without saying anything. Gerald, Jane and Leona enjoyed Desmond at dinner as much as they had at breakfast, if not more. Afterward they all went into the family room and played a board game, then watched a movie on cable. By eleven o’clock, the residents said good-night then headed for bed. Anna Marie stood, ready to walk Desmond to the door, but he took her hand in a warm clasp and stopped her. “Do you think you’ll be lonely tonight?” he asked in a deep tone.
“No,” she said with an edge of regret. “I’m really tired.”
“Me, too.” He held up his free hand when she began to speak. “I don’t want anything,” he said his dark eyes searching her face. “I just want to be with you.”
Anna Marie froze in confusion. “You just want to be with me?”
Desmond ran a tired hand down his face, still holding hers with his other one. “Look, what I just said is soppy enough. Please don’t make me repeat it. Can I stay or not?”
She drew her hand away from his hold and a coy smile touched her lips. “I’ll bolt the front door and meet you upstairs.”
Anna Marie woke up alone, filled with an unquenchable joy. Last night had been all she could have hoped for. She still felt Desmond’s arms around her as he held her close before he fell asleep. There was no pretense, no demands, just the pleasure of being together. She didn’t care that he’d be gone in the morning; the night was all she needed.
When she woke she reached over as she always did to touch the space beside her. His side of the bed was empty, but still warm. Anna Marie swept her hand over the empty space, surprised. Usually it was cold by now. She paused when she heard a deep rumbling voice. She sat up and saw Desmond sitting on the end of the bed feeding a piece of lettuce to Nika. He’d put on a pair of jeans, but his back was bare.
Anna Marie blinked, then reached out to touch him to make sure he was real. She snatched back her hand before she did. He continued to talk to Nika in a low tone but she couldn’t make out the words. Not that her addled brain could process anything. He was still here. He hadn’t gone. He’d been with her all day and all night. She hadn’t had to pretend or be someone else. The sight of him made her giddy with joy. She pushed the sheets aside and wrapped her arms around his neck, inhaling his scent. He smelled clean, like freshly laundered sheets.
“You smell good,” she said.
“I used your shower.”
She kissed his shoulder, then behind his ear. “I’m so happy you’re here.”
“Same.” He chuckled, amused by her exuberance. “Good morning.”
Anna Marie jumped out of bed and grabbed her robe before heading to the bathroom with a spring in her step. “Yes, it is.”
Her good mood continued throughout breakfast and improved when Dana arrived that afternoon to drop off the gifts Anna Marie had purchased at the bazaar. Anna Marie introduced her to everyone, then handed out her purchases. The residents received them as though it were an unexpected holiday. They oohed and aahed like children, except for Desmond, who was oddly quiet as he stared at his Swiss Army knife.
“He likes it,” Dana assured Anna Marie when she caught her worried expression. “You have a lovely house. Care to give me a tour?”
“Of course.”
Anna Marie proudly showed Dana around the house, making sure to skip the basement, then invited her to stay for lunch. She did and they all enjoyed the food and friendship. Eventually, Dana said she had to go and Desmond said the same. Anna Marie reluctantly followed him to the door, wishing he would stay another night. “It’s been fun.”
“Yes.” He held up his gift. “Thanks for this,” he said in a neutral tone.
“You’re welcome,” she said, trying to read his eyes, but unable to. She folded her arms. “Is something wrong?”
“No. I’ll call you.” He bent and kissed her lightly on the mouth, then turned.
Anna Marie began to reply, but Jane called her seeking advice on how to wear her scarf, so Anna Marie went back inside.
Desmond headed for his motorcycle, but Dana stopped him. “You’re really serious about her.”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” he said in a tight voice. He walked around her.
“That’s understandable. You were serious about Tracie, too.”
“That was a mistake.”
“My dad and your dad have been on the phone for hours talking about you.”
He held up the knife. “Do you know how much this means to me? Years ago I told her I wanted one and I’d let myself forget about it, but she remembered.” He cradled the knife in his hand and lowered his voice. “She remembered.”
“I know she’s important to you. And I like Anna Marie, but she’s already causing you trouble.”
Desmond stopped and rested his hands on his hips. “She hasn’t done anything.”
Dana tilted her head to the side. “If she’d only come dressed a little more conservative—”
He tapped his chest. “I like the way she dresses, how she looks and talks. I like everything about her and I don’t care what anyone else thinks.”
“If this is some sort of rebellion, you’re winning.”
“I’m not with Anna Marie to provoke my father. I’m too old for t
hat.”
“You hate your job, your ex and your apartment is all show. You pretend to love it, but the moment I saw you here—” she turned to the house “—you looked at home.” She sighed and met his gaze. “I want you to be happy, just be careful because it’s not only about you. Anna Marie hasn’t had an easy life and exposing her to our family’s rejection isn’t fair to her.”
“I’ll protect her,” he said as if he were willing to fight the world. “She’ll be safe with me.” He headed for his motorcycle then stopped and swore. He slowly spun around. “There’s something else you should know.”
“What?”
“Tracie’s her sister.”
“Your ex?”
He nodded grimly.
Dana burst into laughter, then sobered when she saw Desmond’s face. “You’re serious?”
He nodded again. She laughed harder.
“This isn’t funny,” he growled.
She wiped away tears. “I know and I’m sorry.” She covered her mouth, trying to suppress her amusement.
“We haven’t told her yet,” Desmond said when Dana finally calmed down. “She’s out of town right now, but Anna Marie will tell her when Tracie gets back.”
Dana patted his shoulder with pity. “Desmond, Trouble definitely likes to follow you. And this time Trouble has a name.”
Trouble returned six weeks later bearing gifts for Anna Marie.
“You have to change the decor in this room,” Tracie said as she walked around Anna Marie’s bedroom, her gaze falling on the ornate bed draped in red silk. “Why did you bring me up here anyway?”
“Because I want to talk to you.”
“About what?”
Anna Marie began to reply when Tracie suddenly squealed and jumped on the bed. “What is it?”
Anna Marie looked around astonished. “What is what?”
Tracie waved her finger at the dresser. “That!”
Anna Marie turned and saw Nika peeking his head out. “Oh, that’s just my turtle. He’s harmless.”
Tracie slowly crawled off the bed. “You have a turtle?”
“Yes. I’ll explain more, later. Right now we have to talk.”
“First, do you like what I got you?”
Anna Marie looked at the simple pants set her sister had purchased. She already knew it wouldn’t fit and would spend the rest of its days in the back of her closet. “It’s very thoughtful.”