I stuck my hand out to him. “You’ve got yourself a deal.”
He took my hand, and the two of us shook.
It’s almost impossible to think about how much I wanted to get out of this place when I first moved here. Now I could say that I was happy. Very happy. In fact, one might even say I was starting to feel like a true Texan. And who knew that two of my biggest fans would end up being football players?
A loud horn startled Logan and me out of our little heart-to-heart moment.
“Let’s get a move on!” Mia yelled out the window. “We’ve got the Showcase to get to.”
The two of us climbed onto the bus, and the driver pulled out of my development as fast as she could without speeding.
“You really outdid yourself today,” I told Mia.
“That’s what friends do,” Mia said. “They bring entire school buses when you need help.”
“If that’s not a good friend, I don’t know what is,” I told her.
Everyone talked and joked on the way to TSOTA, and we made it there with twenty minutes to spare.
“You’ve got this,” Mia whispered to me and gave me a giant hug. “In fact, I’m going to be really mad if I see you around Leighton High next year.”
“Oh, now you want to get rid of me?”
“Yep, if someone has as much talent as you, the only place you belong is TSOTA. But don’t forget that we have a standing date for burritos once a week and Friday-night lights.”
“I’m never going to get away from football, am I?”
“You couldn’t even if you tried,” Mia said, and something told me she was right.
But as I got off that bus and the middle school football team, the same boys who I had hated at the start of the school year for invading my dance studio, hung out of the windows and cheered and wished me luck, I was pretty sure I’d be okay with that. Because home wasn’t always a place or a location. Home was where you felt like you belonged, and even if I fought the football fever, I had to admit that Leighton was a part of me. And I was a part of Leighton.
Chapter 58
I waved one last time at everyone on the bus and headed into the theater where the Showcase was being held. I have to admit that after the send-off the middle school football team had given me, I was feeling pretty good.
You’ve got this, Brooklyn, I told myself. You’re going to dance better than you’ve ever danced before, and everyone in the audience will be wowed beyond belief!
It’s amazing what a bus full of your fans can do. I practically strutted up the front steps and right into the lobby.
A lobby full of dancers.
There were so many dancers.
And they all looked completely relaxed. The opposite of how I felt at the moment. Some stretched, while others talked and joked with each other, texted on their phones, or listened to music on headphones. I doubted any of them had stomachs that were turning somersaults like mine was.
And just like that, my confidence quickly vanished as I took everyone in.
There are only six spots open, a voice inside my head said, and the doubt crept in. Remember the last time you danced alone? Do you really think you can get up onstage and compete against these people? What if you forget your steps? What if you fall?
“What was I thinking?” I asked out loud. A wave of panic settled over me so it was as if I were drowning. A million billion thoughts raced through my mind, and not one of them was good.
“This was a bad idea,” I told myself. “A very bad idea.”
I needed to get out of there. I wasn’t ready for this. It had been silly to think I could dance a solo again. I was headed toward the doors when I heard my name being called.
“Brooklyn! Over here!”
I spotted a group in the corner waving their hands around to get my attention. I did a double take, because there, yelling my name, were Elliana, Adeline, and Jayden. I made my way through the crowd to them. I didn’t think I’d ever been more relieved to see some familiar faces.
“What are you all doing here?” I asked.
“We’re your biggest fan club,” Jayden said.
“And my only,” I told him. “Seriously, what’s going on? I figured you’d be with your family, cheering on your brother and the rest of the team.”
“Silly girl,” Jayden said. “You’re the star. We wanted to be here for you.”
“You didn’t think we’d leave you all alone to perform, did you?” Adeline asked. “The whole town might be cheering on the football team today, but they’re the ones who are wrong. The All-City Showcase is the place to be.”
I gestured around to the room packed full of other dance hopefuls. “Obviously. Look how many people are here.”
“You’re going to do an amazing job,” Elliana said and gave me a hug. “I can’t believe that I’m going to be able to say that I have a friend who goes to TSOTA.”
“Whoa, let’s hold up a bit,” I said holding up my hand in the stop position. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I need to get through the dance first, and right now I’m not feeling it at all. I’m scared out of my mind.”
“Then you’re perfectly normal, “Jayden said. “If you weren’t scared, I’d think something was wrong with you. We all get stage fright before a big performance.”
“Yeah, and I usually throw up before I have to dance in front of an audience,” Adeline said, and when she saw our grossed-out faces, she shrugged. “What? It happens. And once I do, I’m ready to take on the world.”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I had a really bad experience the last time I danced in front of a big audience. And the pressure might be too much. Look at all these other dancers. How in the world can I compete with everyone?”
“Then don’t,” Elliana said.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t worry about the other dancers and the judges. Just dance because you love it.”
“Just dance,” I repeated, which seemed to be the mantra from pretty much everyone around me.
Jayden gave me a push toward the registration table. “Go check in and warm up. Don’t doubt yourself for a second. You’ve got this.”
“You really think I can do this?” I asked them.
“We know you can,” Adeline said, and Jayden and Elliana nodded in agreement. “Now get over here and let’s have a group hug.”
And that’s exactly what we did. I stepped into my friends’ arms and let them envelop me. And maybe we looked silly standing in the middle of the room hugging like that, but in that moment, I felt so loved and supported, I couldn’t help but strut over to that registration table.
“I’m Brooklyn Gartner,” I told the woman and paused. I glanced over to my friends, who waved wildly and gave me thumbs-up signs. I laughed softly to myself before turning back to the woman. “And I’m ready to dance.”
And it was true.
I was ready.
I was so ready.
Chapter 59
Dancing in the All-City Showcase was a lot different from my recital, and I think that helped. Instead of wearing the white nightgown that Clara has in the show, I wore my leotard and tights. And the stage was empty, with no sets or props. It made it easier to pretend that this was a rehearsal. That I was in the studio or my basement and not about to perform the biggest dance of my life.
I stepped out onto the stage and stood in the center, where a spotlight was focused. The stage lights above glowed so bright that the audience was nothing but a blank black space.
All this time I had been worried about whether or not Mom was in the audience, but it wouldn’t have even mattered. I couldn’t see anyone sitting out there.
And I realized was that they didn’t need to be sitting out there for me to feel their love and support. It covered me like the old quilt my grandma had made, familiar and warm.
I thought about how lucky I was in that moment. About everyone who had brought me to that point and what I carried from each of them. They might not have all been there physically,
but that didn’t mean that they weren’t with me. As I stood on that stage, I knew every one of them was cheering me on.
I closed my eyes and pictured them all.
An amazing mom who had believed in me from the start.
A stepbrother who taught me how important it was to chase my dreams.
A stepdad who encouraged me as much as he did his own son.
A best friend from Oregon who never let me give up.
A best friend from Texas who reminded me what it meant to dance.
A bus full of middle school football players who understood hard work and what it can do for you.
A dance partner who taught me to see this town in a different way.
A dance teacher who trusted in my talent.
And the best classmates ever, who had shown up to remind me that I could do this.
I carried every single one of them with me.
I’d been so afraid to go up and dance onstage alone, but the thing was, I’d never been alone.
The speakers crackled and a woman’s voice announced me.
“Dancer twenty-three is Brooklyn Gartner. She is in eighth grade and dances at Center Stage Dance Studio.”
“This is it,” I whispered to myself. “You can do it.”
I stepped into third position and waited for my turn to show them all what I could do.
The music started, and I counted the first measures. It filled my veins, coursing through me until it invaded every part of me and I couldn’t think of anything but the music and the movement and that moment.
I shut out the world around me.
I let go of the past.
I ignored my fears, and the audience disappeared.
I was muscle and strength and beauty.
The world was gone, and it was me and my love for ballet—and it was incredible.
I’d been so wrong about dancing onstage again. I had thought I didn’t belong here, but it was the exact opposite. As I moved through the steps, I realized that this was where I was supposed to be. This was what I had been searching for. This was what I had needed to find again.
Because there, on that stage, I was home.
Chapter 60
After I finished dancing, I went back into the theater and grabbed a seat in the back, where I watched the rest of the dancers. There were some really skilled people onstage, and it was incredible to think Mary Rose had thought I was good enough to be in the Showcase with them.
After the last dancer performed and the lights in the theater came on, everyone poured out. I scanned the crowd for my friends, but it wasn’t their faces that I saw coming up the aisle.
“Mom?” I asked, totally confused.
“Honey,” she said with a huge smile on her face. “You were amazing.”
I moved into the aisle so she could come in and avoid the crowd heading out. She handed me a giant bouquet of flowers, which I accepted, still in disbelief.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Don’t be mad at me,” she started. “I know you wanted to do this yourself, but I couldn’t miss your performance. There’s nothing that I love more in the world than seeing you dance. And for what it’s worth, you didn’t know I was here; you did it thinking I wasn’t.”
“But what about the game?”
“Stephen is there to support Tanner, and Mia promised to record everything for me so that the two of us can watch it together. This is where I needed to be. There was never any question about that.”
“I’m glad you came,” I told her and wrapped my arms around her in a hug. I thought about how true my words were, because having Mom here made everything a million times better.
“I am too,” she whispered into my ear, and I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to have a mom as incredible as mine.
The two of us pulled apart as a woman came up the aisle toward me.
“Brooklyn Gartner?” she asked, and when I nodded, she extended her hand to both Mom and me. “I’m Eliza Carter. I’m one of the teachers at Texas School of the Arts. I was happy to see that you checked our school on the Showcase form for programs that you’re interested in. You’ll get an official invitation in the mail in about a week, but I wanted to let you know that we’d love for you to audition for the school.”
“You would?” I asked, and I was pretty sure my jaw dropped all the way to the floor.
She laughed politely and nodded. “Your dancing was very impressive, and we’re excited to learn more about you.”
“Thank you, thank you very much,” I said and tried to play it cool, but was that even possible during a moment like this? She walked out of the theater, and I turned to Mom. “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Did that just happen?”
“It did, and you deserve it,” Mom said, and the two of us jumped up and down in excitement, because what else were you supposed to do when you found out that TSOTA was interested in you?
“This is the best news in the world,” Mom said, and I couldn’t have agreed more.
Chapter 61
The next evening we sat around the kitchen table celebrating, because the football team did something incredible: They brought home the state championship, and Tanner had an amazing game. The town couldn’t have been more excited. And I was a very proud sister.
“Are you sure you don’t want to celebrate with the team?” Stephen asked as Tanner dished up another heaping helping of Mom’s lasagna. We were all seated around the dinner table, eating our food a little too fast because Mom had bought a German chocolate cake to eat for dessert.
“Nope, this is where I want to be,” Tanner said. “I can meet up with some of those guys after dinner. But for now, I want to spend time with all of you. With my family.”
Mom beamed, and I was pretty sure she swept a tear away from her eye.
“Speaking of being where I want to be, I was looking at housing at UT, and it seems a lot easier to stay here for the first year or two. I could save a ton of money if I did that. What do you think?”
Mom’s face lit up. “That would be wonderful. We’d love to have you around here longer.”
Stephen nodded in agreement. “You’re always welcome here.”
Tanner turned toward me. “What about you, Brooklyn? Could you handle having your stepbrother around a little bit longer?”
“Brother,” I said to Tanner. “Forget the ‘step’ part. You’re my brother, and I think it would be great to have you around.”
Tanner grinned, and I thought about what I’d just said. About Tanner and family and being there for everyone. You don’t get to pick who your family is, but you’re pretty lucky when your family ends up being people you would want to pick. And this family would always be my first choice. Always.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Much like football, writing is a team effort, and I’ve been so lucky for the group of people that surrounded and supported me as I wrote this book.
As always, thank you to my incredible agent, Natalie Lakosil, who has always been one of my book’s biggest cheerleaders.
I’m so lucky to have been able to work on my fourth book with my amazing editor, Alyson Heller. I couldn’t ask for a better editor and your ideas, insights, and suggestions always make the book sparkle and shine. A thank you also to the dream team at Simon & Schuster, Elizabeth Mims, Sara Berko, and Jessica Handelman, who never fail to help create a finished product that I love.
There is nothing greater than being able to write for the audience that I teach. Thank you to the Perry Local School District for your never-ending support, and a special shout out to the Writer’s Club, High School English Department, and librarian-extradionaire, Jodi Rzeszotarski.
Thank you to Chris Bezzeg, who answered all the random questions I texted him about football. Your expertise is much appreciated, and any mistakes in the book with descriptions of football are all my own.
I started taking dance classes when I was young, and while it wasn’t smooth sailing from the beginning (I was a fan of free
zing up and not moving while everyone danced around me!), I have such amazing memories of my time spent in studios with some of the best teachers and friends. A special thanks to my first teacher, Jeanne Hollick, who had to put up with my personal “invented” choreography, and dance partner and BFF, Betsy Kahl. Whether the two of us were dancing together in class, on stage, or in my bedroom to Michael Jackson or Madonna, nothing beat our moves, and your white stag role will go down in history for its epicness.
A million thanks to my readers; I write these books for you! There is nothing better than hearing from those of you who have reached out and sent letters and e-mails. I love you all and it’s so incredible to be able to write the stories I would have wanted to read when I was your age.
Thank you to my WSS, Elle La Marca for all the motivation, chat sessions, and plot whispering, and for just being your awesome self!
My family has always been my first cheerleaders and I could never thank you enough for your endless support, enthusiasm, and kind words.
Brooklyn, Addie, Ellie, Calvin, and Maggie . . . thank you for being the greatest nieces and nephew in the world! I’ve loved being a part of your lives and watching you grow as you become amazing individuals with such fun, smart, and silly personalities. Spending time with all of you is one of my favorite things to do!
And to Nolan, my little writing buddy from the day you were born. You inspire me to be better and to do better for the world. Your personality, creativity, and imagination remind me so much of myself when I was young and every day is a new amazing adventure with you. I’m in awe at the person you are becoming and am so honored to be your mom.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
One of Rachele Alpine’s first jobs was at a library, but it didn’t last long, because all she did was hide in the third-floor stacks and read. Now she’s a little more careful about when and where she indulges her reading habit. Rachele is a high school English teacher by day, a wife and mother by night, and a writer during any time she can find in between. She lives in Cleveland, Ohio, where she writes middle-grade and young adult novels. Visit her at www.rachelealpine.com.
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