by A. J. Briar
“Isabella, go and get some sleep.”
“I can sleep here.” She goes to sit down, but my mom stops her.
“Nathan’s right dear. You need a bit of rest and preferably in a bed.” Isabella looks like she’s about to refuse, but when her eyes droop slightly, I know she caves. She leans over me and places a light kiss on my cheek, leaving me craving for more. We haven’t really spoke about what happened but realistically neither of us are in the right headspace to deal with the shit storm that went down. Isabella whispers that she’ll be back as soon as she can escape, leaving me with a ridiculous smile on my face. My ma watches our interaction, the joy beaming from her is clear as the sky when its blue.
“She loves you; you know.” I didn’t think it was possible, but my grin gets wider reaching my eyes. Honestly, after Isabella ran, I didn’t think I’d ever get to see her look at me, the way I look at her. I knew I’d hurt her with my actions, the fact I’d withheld the truth from her, was a definite shitty move. But now I know that Noah had indeed pushed her, the beating almost seems justified. Honestly, I wish I’d kill the dude for even putting Isabella in harm’s way, but props to the guy for giving me the heads up that Brooke was still after her. I’m not gonna lie when he said she wasn’t safe; my mind didn’t even conjure Brooke as a suspect. If I’m honest, Seth was at the fore point of my musings, though I haven’t seen or heard from the guy since he was expelled.
It was pure luck that after I’d rolled up to her house to find Isla in bits that my mind decided to actually do me a solid and figure out where she’d be. Isabella was always a magnet for trouble, and I knew she’d be beating herself up about not remembering that the ‘accident’ wasn’t actually an accident, but a minor part in a major plan.
Part of me also hoped that because the beach was my happy place, that she’d remembered that detail and wanted to relive the many memories we had there. I’d nearly given up hope of finding her, if I hadn’t wanted to punish myself, I never would have dragged my ass down the pier. I never would have seen and heard Brooke’s confession and then see her pointing a gun at Isabella. My brain scrambles to piece together what happened after the moment, I noticed that Brooke was seriously unhinged and directing a gun at the love of my life. All I could think was that I had to protect her, even if that meant taking a bullet for her. And you know what, I’d do it all over again. Isabella is, without a doubt, the most important person in my life besides my ma, and nothing will ever change that. My only regret is that I obviously pushed Isabella too hard, causing her to hit her head. I close my eyes and I’m haunted by the end of the memory. I’m not even sure what I’m more troubled by; the fact Brooke shot herself in the head next to me, or the fact that I only managed to get a glimpse of Isabella before succumbing to the pain. In a sick twisted way, I envy that Brooke chose the easy way out. She deserved a lifetime of terror for everything that she’s done. The scheming, the manipulation, the cheating, I mentally kick myself that I hadn’t seen what a bitch she was from the beginning.
My ma’s voice breaks me from my thoughts as she asks what I’m thinking about.
“Just wondering how I failed to see that Brooke was behind everything.” Even I can hear the blame in my voice, which receives a heavy sigh.
“Don’t. Don’t you dare boy. Nobody could have predicted what that girl was up to.” I open my mouth like a fish about to respond but she holds a hand up to stop me. “You realize that you saved Isabella’s life. This could have ended entirely different if you hadn’t been looking for her. She’d be dead Nathan. And no doubt none of us would be any of the wiser that Brooke was the culprit.” Tears form in my eyes as I think of a world without Isabella in it. The thought alone has me wanting to tear my own heart out. I honestly don’t know how I’d cope.
“Luckily, you saved her, so never think that you are to blame. We were all blindsided by Brooke.” I know its fruitless to argue back, my ma’s using her no-nonsense tone. I know I saved her, but that still doesn’t stop the guilt from creeping up on me. I’ll always wonder what if, though hopefully I’ll eventually come to terms with it all.
My eyelids droop shut, and I drift in and out of consciousness. Some of the times, when I awake, my ma’s there, other times, she’s not. Dreams of Isabella occupy my time and I find myself counting down the hours till I can next see her. Doctor Cole has checked in on me a few times, mostly to make sure, I’ve not managed to find my way to Isabella. She does however inform me that Isabella is being released this evening anyway. It brings a smile to face knowing that Isabella is being stubborn still, demanding to be able to see me. That’s probably part of the reason she’s being discharged early because she’s making such a damn fuss. I figure sleeping is my best option and hours later, my eyes snap open when I hear a commotion outside.
“I don’t care whether he’s asleep, I just need to thank the guy for saving you. You go and get your shit sorted for checking out, I’ll be quick.” I hear an exasperated sigh, then the door edges open while a head peeks inside.
Before I can even speak, Roxy shoves the door fully open and lunges towards my bed. I’m almost afraid what she’s going to do, though when I focus on her expression, all I can see is gratitude. Logan and Rory follow her in, Rory reaches out and pulls her back from her hoodie. Considering they’re twins, he literally has no idea how to deal with her. She shoots him a death glare before wiggling from his grasp.
She takes another step closer to the end of my bed and rests her hands on the railings. Her jet-black hair is in a high ponytail though the ends still trail past her ribs. Rory positions himself on the other side of her, whilst Logan walks to my bed side then pipes up.
“I hope you don’t mind us popping in. We weren’t sure whether you’d be sleeping or not.”
“It’s all good dude, I think I’ve slept enough the past few days to last me a lifetime.” I glance around the room; tension swirls the air tainting it like a bad smell.
“Is everything alright?” My gaze flits between all three, landing on Logan, who looks like his jaw could cut glass.
“Yep. All good. How are you though? How bad is it?” Rory’s the one to answer, which I find weird though I don’t complain. Something’s definitely gone down, and it wouldn’t surprise me if Logan and Roxy have finally boned. Though judging by the glares, they seem to be giving each other, maybe not.
“I’m okay, a little sore, but I guess that’s to be expected. Have you been to see Isabella?” Roxy makes her way round the bed, the opposite side to Logan, then reaches for my hand. The gesture completely takes me by surprise, so when her warm fingers grasp mine, I flinch slightly. I’m used to her tough exterior, that when her face softens and she begins to speak, I almost don’t hear what she says.
“She’s okay, going a little crazy not being able to see you, but they’re releasing her anyway. She’s gone to sign some paperwork, so no doubt will be here soon.” I nod, a smile on my face knowing I’ll get to see her. Roxy squeezes my hand then continues talking.
“Nathan… What you did… I know you’ve known Izzy longer than I have, but she means a hell of a lot to me. To all of us.” She gestures towards the guys who nod in agreement. “Honestly, I can’t thank you enough for saving her. Christ, I keep thinking if I’d gone to collect her when her car broke down, I wouldn’t have hung around. She would’ve have stayed and been alone. No doubt everything would have been incredibly different, and I just don’t know what I would’ve done losing her. Thank fuck, you went instead of me. Thank fuck, you were there. Thank..”
“Rox, you’re rambling.” Logan throws her some serious side eye then turns back to me.
“What she’s trying to say, is we’re all incredibly grateful that you protected Isabella, and we’re glad that you’re here to tell the tale. No major damage right?” He motions to my side, which is still wrapped in gauze.
“Not much, just a graze really. Though it’s gonna kill the first time I do a lay-up.” Rory and Logan laugh, while Roxy looks at me
with awe in her eyes.
“Stick to the three-point line and you’ll be fine.” I chuckle just as the door swings open. Isabella sprints in, followed closely by Isla. Her eyes laser on me and her mouth tilts up into a smile, then her gaze darts around the room.
“Are these guys bothering you?” She raises one eyebrow, trying to keep a smile from forming on her face. Roxy rolls her eyes and smirks then speaks.
“Don’t you go all judgey on me Izzy, I had to thank him, whether you wanted me to or not. He saved your life. You need to realize how important you are. To all of us.” Roxy shoots me a quick wink before turning back to Isabella. Tears are forming in her eyes, and I’m struggling to get a read on her. I’m not sure whether she’s moments away from breaking apart or powering through.
Roxy moves to where Isabella is standing and pulls her into her arms. I’m insanely jealous that she’s the one who gets to comfort her, yet I know Isabella needs this. When they both release each other, Roxy gestures towards the door.
“Come on guys. Let’s go grab some food. I’m getting hangry.” Rory says goodbye and then heads to open the door, Roxy closely behind him. Logan gives me a look of despair, before rearranging his features to be somewhat presentable. There’s definitely a story there and I’m dying to find out what’s gone down. I quirk an eyebrow in question at him, while Roxy is distracted by talking to Isla at the door. Logan leans down, pretending he’s giving me a shoulder pat.
“I caved and told Rox. It didn’t end well.” He whispers before straightening up. The hurt that flashes in his eyes, tells me all I need to know, and it isn’t good. Roxy’s voice floats from the doorway.
“Let’s gooooo, we’ll be back soon, and you can have your little bromance with him then.” Roxy laughs, though the chuckle is forced and sounds off.
Logan nods a goodbye then trudges to where Roxy is standing, hand on hip. She then uses her other hand to point at Isabella.
“Make sure you tell him Izzy.” She winks again, and then closes the door behind her.
“Tell me what?” My heartrate picks up and my mind races, trying to figure out what’s going on. Isabella takes a nervous step towards my bed, and I’m even more on edge. Has she decided that my actions are unforgivable? Has something else happened? The silence stretches between us causing nausea to swirl around my stomach. I can’t lose her again. I’m about to open my mouth when she rounds the bed to perch next to me. Her hand finds its way into mine and she draws soft circles against my skin, lulling me to a sense of calm.
“I’ve thought of so many ways that I could tell you this, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it didn’t matter, the when, the where. All that matters is that you know how I feel.” Time suspends, as I try to calm the tempest of emotions that nearly overwhelm me. She’s using my own words against me. “The love that I feel for you scares me. It always has and probably always will. I was a coward for running from it, but I’m done. When I found out that you’d lied, I was hurt, and honestly wasn’t sure what I felt. But after going to the pier, seeing Brooke, fearing Brooke, clarity hit me. All I could think was I wanted to hold you one last time and yet I couldn’t, and that damn well hurt more than anything Brooke could’ve done to me.” Tears fill her eyes, but she continues. “And then all of a sudden, you were there. Like something I’d conjured out of my imagination, saving me, protecting me. And I knew that if we survived, I had to tell you that I love you. I’ll always love you, regardless of the past and because of it. I’m all in, that is if you still want me.” Trepidation reveals itself in her eyes and I want to kiss that look right off her. How the fuck, she’d think I wouldn’t want her is mindboggling, yet oddly entirely Isabella.
I untwine our hands and reach for her face. Pain shoots from my side as I lean up, but I ignore it. Our lips meet in the middle, and the feeling of euphoria washes everything away. I want more, I need more, but a cough interrupts our reunion. Isla looks at us both sheepishly, and I mentally kick myself that I’d actually forgotten that she was there. I glance back to Isabella and rest my forehead against hers before speaking.
“I think it goes without saying that I love you too. I’ve always loved you, even after you tried to bulldoze me over that first day of school.” She giggles and I find myself entranced by her. I could very easily sit here for the rest of my life, simply in her embrace.
“I’m sure there’s better places and positions where we can continue this.” She winks and it’s only then that I realize, I spoke my thoughts aloud.
“I’m sure there is.” My voice is laced with my need for her, though I know that’s probably not going to be a possibility until I’m out of here.
“Can you both at least try and keep it PG? It sucks picturing my baby sister getting more action that I am.” Isla inserts herself into the conversation as both me and Isabella pull back enough so we can see her. “While we’re all making epic speeches here, I wanted to say something to you both too.” Isla clears her throat and Isabella retreats even further narrowing her eyes on her sister, in a curious way. “I know I fucked up, and I know I’ve apologized to you B, but I need to apologize to you too Nathan. You kept what you knew a secret because I forced you too, and it nearly cost you your relationship. So, I’m sorry Nathan. I’d like to say I’m sorry for telling you, but then I feel like if you hadn’t have known, you wouldn’t have beat up Noah, you wouldn’t have transferred, ergo you two wouldn’t have reconnected. But still, I’m sorry I made you lie. And I’m glad that you were able to protect Isabella.” Isabella pops her mouth open, but I beat her to it.
“You don’t need to apologize, Isla. I made the decision to keep it from her too. I had plenty of opportunities to come clean and I didn’t.” My voice trails off, but Isabella picks up where I left off.
“Besides, Isla we should really be thanking you for rescuing us. If you hadn’t have come, Nathan might not even be here.” The news that Isla was there startles me. I had no idea how she managed to figure out where we were but I’m grateful that she got to us in time. I tell her as much which makes her blush slightly.
“It was honestly nothing. I’m just glad that you’re both okay. Brooke’s dead. And this whole ordeal is over.” Her words ring a loud and clear though it reminds me of one thing that could potentially ruin the moment.
“Have we heard anything about Noah?” Isabella’s lip trembles for a moment before she nods to Isla for her to speak.
“Noah’s AWOL. But the cops are looking for him. Isabella’s already made a statement about what she remembers so hopefully they’ll catch up to him.” The dude deserves whatever comes to him, but a part of me is glad that he forewarned us about Brooke, and for that little shred of decency, I’ll owe him.
“I don’t think Noah was really the problem here. Brooke manipulated him and used him like a pawn in a chess game. I doubt we’ll see him again.” Isabella’s words surprise me considering how much of a dick he was to her. “Enough about him though. We’ll cross that bridge if we come to it.” She leans down and pecks my lips, leaving me wanting more. I almost wish I could hold her in my arms against my chest, though I know the agony would be intolerable. If I’m honest, just sitting up, has ruined my threshold of pain for today.
Sensing my discomfort, Isabella hops up off the bed and settles in on the chair instead. Isla excuses herself to grab a coffee, while me and Isabella shoot the breeze. She fills me in on speaking to the police both about Brooke and Noah. I hate that I wasn’t there to support her but I’m relieved that Isla was instead.
I ask her about the weird vibe I got from Roxy and Logan, but she keeps her lips sealed, stating girl code and all that. When we’re both talked out, she rests her head against my hand, and our eyes shut in unison. The warmth and the comfort she provides, sends me into a dream filled sleep of our future.
The one I want to have with her.
The one that I can sense on the horizon.
The one that fills me with hope and erases all the heartache fr
om the past.
Epilogue
A month later
Isabella
“Seriously Izzy, stop fussing over him. He’s fine.” Roxy’s sentiments fall on deaf ears though, as I reorganize the pillow that’s under his head for the tenth time. Nathan’s completely oblivious to the world, the pain meds the hospital gave him, knocked him straight out, but I still worry. The guy saved my life, the least I can do, is make sure he’s comfortable. I lean over and tenderly place a kiss on his forehead, before closing my bedroom door behind me. Roxy follows and heads straight towards the kettle.
I’m not going to lie; the past month has been simultaneously one of the best and one of the worst months of my life. Nathan was released a few days ago, his recovery took a little longer than everyone expected. Hell, I was on tender hooks every single day, that I couldn’t see him. I almost dropped out of college, so I could stay with him. Of course, Isla wouldn’t let me do that. She spent just as much time, keeping him company, then I did. It’s been hard not seeing him, but it made all those times I was able to visit, more special. Honestly, I’m a little annoyed at myself for not realizing sooner, just how special Nathan is to me. I wasted two years running from him, when I should’ve just sucked it up and faced my past.
A loud bang startles me from my thoughts, and I swivel on my heels, to see Logan dump another box by the door. His eyes track Roxy’s movements as she continues to tinker in the kitchen. Hurt shines like a beacon, and I can’t bear to watch his pain. Neither of them, told me what want down that weekend, but I know that Logan put his heart on the line, and Roxy stomped all over it. There’s definitely more to it, but the two times I’ve approached Roxy, she’s shut me down. I’d go as far to say, she’s in complete denial over it all. Logan shakes off the agony I know he’s feeling then turns his attention to me.
“Hey, how’s he feeling?” He nods towards my bedroom door, concern filling his expression.