Now it was my turn for some payback. My fingers had been holding Cornell’s stun phone. I finished pulling it out of my pocket and fired, catching him at a sensitive spot between the knees and waist with a sizable jolt of electricity. His muscles spasmed and his limbs rapidly alternated between the spread-eagle and fetal positions. Considering that Cornell had just shot me and had planned to shoot me with his stun phone—at a higher setting—in the capitol’s sub-sub-basement, I didn’t waste CPU cycles feeling bad for him. I shoved him with my foot and that interrupted his pattern of limb movements.
“Where’s Zwilniki?” I said.
“Gone,” said Cornell, through clenched teeth.
“Where?”
“Off planet by now,” said Cornell.
“Where?”
“Dauush.”
“I don’t think so.”
“He’s. Not. Going. Alone.”
“He’s not going at all, if I can help it,” I said.
Cornell gave me a look. I think he was trying to do sullen, but while he was still coping with the pain of being zapped by his stun phone it came across more like a bad case of gas. Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.
“We both know Zwilniki’s not on Dauush yet,” I said. “So where is he now?”
Being stunned must have affected his cranium as well as his cojones, because Cornell glanced in the direction of the elevator. He saw me see him look and I could tell he wasn’t happy with himself. I didn’t think he was enough of an actor to fake me out about it while curled into a whimpering ball so at least I knew where to go next. I picked up the pistol Cornell had dropped when he was stunned and put it in my belt next the knife I’d made from Spike’s tooth. Then I checked all their pockets. Cornell had more ammunition for his pistol and another stun phone. I confiscated both items. Penn and Princeton had several sets of heavy-duty zip-ties, so I zipped their wrists and ankles. They were still in unconscious cloud cuckoo land. When I zipped up Cornell the same way, he seemed to appreciate being restrained. I think that made it easier for him to stay tucked in a tight ball where it hurt less. I got one of the molasses chill field sweetener rifles from Terrhi and pointed it at him. Cornell looked grateful. Molasses chill fields slow and reduce the intensity of nerve impulses. I triggered the sweetener. He gave up trying to stay awake and joined his associates in dreamland.
It would be nice to say that the room grew quiet, but it didn’t. While I was taking care of these details Terrhi was talking non-stop. Even juvenile Dauushans have big lungs, with twelve lobes, so it took a while before I could get a word in edgewise.
“You’re okay? Nobody hurt you?”
“I’m fine, Uncle Jack. Mr. Zwilniki took the elevator down a few minutes ago. The doors just re-opened right before you got here. Thanks for rescuing me—you’re my hero! How did you find me? Is my Dad worried? Did he tell my Mom? She’s going to be very angry. Is Spike okay? How’s Poly?”
I provided the appropriate responses and used my mutakey to unlock her cage. I helped Terrhi get out, then tossed the three minions inside and relocked the cage, just in case they were able to get out of their plastic bonds once they woke up. Chit was relaying details to the others and Tomáso was very pleased I’d found his daughter.
“Your Dad says he’s glad you’re safe.”
“I’m glad I am, too. After I woke up they weren’t mean to me but I didn’t like being in a cage. Do you have anything to eat? I’m really hungry. I didn’t want to eat anything here in case they put drugs in it!”
“Let me check.” I rummaged in my backpack, found my emergency stash—two Nicósn chocolate bars—and passed them to Terrhi. They were flavored with rum which I hoped might counteract their sugar content and calm Terrhi down a bit. Given her current state of excitement the last thing she needed was more sugar, but the bars were all I had to offer. I needed to talk to Tomáso to get his blessing for my next step. Chit relayed, by voice this time so Terrhi could hear.
“Tomáso, I need to follow Zwilniki, but I don’t want to leave Terrhi here alone. Are you okay with me bringing her with me? It might be dangerous.”
“It would be more dangerous for her to remain in that chamber by herself.” I was impressed. Chit did a great job of imitating Tomáso’s voice. How a Murm the size of a quarter and a dime could reproduce the vocal quality of an eight ton adult Dauushan was a question for another day. She continued to relay in Tomáso’s booming basso. “Keep her safe, but get that rotten son of a prickly tree seed pod for me, Jack, or flush him out so I can deal with him personally.”
“Will do,” I said, kicking myself mentally because I could have just used my phone and called Tomáso. No, scratch that. No bars. We must be several stories below ground already. Zwilniki’s headquarters was literally a virtual labyrinth.
“Terrhi can hear you,” I said.
“Hi, Daddy,” said Terrhi.
“Be brave, little one,” said Chit, still sounding like Tomáso.
“I will be,” said the girl. “You’ll be proud of me.”
“I already am.”
It was time to go. I kept one of the sweetener rifles and Terrhi kept the other. At least we were armed. We entered the industrial sized elevator.
“Can I press the button, Uncle Jack?”
“Sure.”
I hoped Zwilniki’s karma would be similar to Cornell’s once we found him.
We descended.
Chapter 31
“No one will stop my quest to find you.” ― Susane Colasanti
We didn’t have to worry about what floor Zwilniki had gotten off on since there was only a pair of down and up buttons on the elevator. Terrhi was sure she’d seen him go down, not up, and I was confident in her powers of observation. When the doors opened I had a sense of déjà vu. In front of us was the same translucent sky bridge above a bustling futuristic city I’d seen when I’d visited VIGorish Labs earlier. At the far end of the bridge was the sky deck that looked like the top of the Chrysler Building. Terrhi and I double-timed it across the sky bridge and entered the building. This time I wasn’t distracted by the art that lined the corridor, though Terrhi tried to dawdle and take in the pulsing cave paintings, vegetative knotwork and computer chip designs. I tugged her along until we reached the chrome-plated doors to Zwilniki’s office. This time I wasn’t waiting for Ms. Rocha to announce us. I pulled open both doors and Terrhi and I stormed inside. Zwilniki was standing at his desk, the galaxy slowly rotating to a Strauss waltz on the giant wall screen behind him.
“Freeze, Zwilniki!” I said, pointing my sweetener at him. He didn’t.
“So kind of you to bring the alien,” he said. “It’s time to go.”
“You’re not going anywhere.”
“I’m going to conquer Dauush,” said Zwilniki, “and then the rest of the galaxy.”
“Earth über alles?”
“Exactly, Jack. I’ve got ten thousand highly trained soldiers in the hanger ready to get it done. One last chance to join in Earth’s glorious future.”
“No thanks.”
With the impetuousness of youth, Terrhi spoke up and took action. “Nobody’s taking over my planet,” she shouted, then shot Zwilniki twice with her sweetener. Both shots bounced off some sort of energy field in front of Zwilniki’s desk. I did notice a flicker in the virtual reality generating systems afterward, though. For a second I could see the room as it actually was—a plain gray space holding a metal table with two chairs—then the illusion reasserted itself. I was able to spot several of the virtual reality projectors this time, high up in the corners of the room.
“Shoot the projectors,” I told Terrhi. She’d spotted them, too and fired at the ones on the right while I took the ones on the left. There were more flickers, but the illusion held and Zwilniki laughed. As far as evil villain laughs went it was pretty pathetic. I wondered if he practiced in front of a mirror. He reached into his desk and pulled out a nasty looking Pâkk energy pistol. It might be virtual, but I didn’t want to tes
t that assumption. So long as the VR projectors were working even a virtual energy pistol was bad news.
“That will be enough of that,” said Zwilniki, pointing the energy pistol our way.
It is unwise to underestimate the stubbornness an angry Dauushan, even a small one. Terrhi didn’t stop, she fired burst after burst from her molasses chill field rifle at Zwilniki. The field in front of his desk shimmered and the simulation flickered with each burst. While Terrhi distracted Zwilniki I pulled out Cornell’s stun phones—the original and the one I’d just confiscated—and with one in each hand shot the VR projectors to either side of the giant wall screen. Molasses chill fields have a small electric component but they’re primarily molecular stasis generators. Stun phones store huge electric charges and release them all at once. The blasts of electricity from the two stun phones did serious damage. First, the galactic wall screen began to pixelate. Then the Strauss waltz became more of a dirge as the damage to the projectors accumulated. I stopped firing to give the stun phones time to recharge. Terrhi’s rifle had run out of juice so she grabbed my sweetener and kept firing at Zwilniki. Zwilniki aimed his energy pistol at Terrhi and fired but she dodged with surprising speed. The blast missed her and left scorch marks on the exotic carpet, which was also starting to pixelate, revealing plain concrete beneath. It is unwise to underestimate the agility of an angry Dauushan, too, apparently.
Ignoring Zwilniki and his pistol, I turned my back and used the now recharged stun phones to shoot the two VR projectors on our side of the room. This time my aim must have improved. Sparks flew from the projectors and everything around us turned to chaotic patterns of fuzzy colored squares. Then the music stopped, the colors disappeared and all the illusions vanished. Terrhi and I were in a bare gray room with Zwilniki, a plain metal table and two metal chairs. Congruency-powered emergency lights came on. A section of wall swung back and an emergency exit sign above it lit up. Zwilniki’s energy pistol was gone. I tried to shoot him with the stun phones but their power was exhausted. Terrhi tried shooting him with the sweeteners but both were drained. She reversed both weapons, holding them like clubs in two of her trunks and charged Zwilniki. Even from behind Terrhi looked terrifying—a true warrior princess.
Zwilniki turned toward the emergency exit and ran.
* * * * *
We followed, just steps behind. A dozen yards ahead was a door. Zwilniki went through it with Terrhi and me in pursuit. The door opened onto the double-width grand corridor. Terrhi and I bumped into each other as we both tried to get through the door at the same time. That allowed Zwilniki to get farther ahead. We saw him put his palm on a section of wall, which opened to reveal a narrow niche. It was a charging station for a Segway. Given Zilniki’s personality, it was no surprise that this unit, which must have been his personal mode of transportation between buildings, was chrome-plated and polished to a mirror shine. Terrhi and I tried to close the distance before he could pull the Segway from the niche but we were too late. He was rolling down the grand corridor before we could catch him. I didn’t see how we could reach him now.
Then I felt myself being lifted by two of Terrhi’s main trunks and unceremoniously plopped on her back.
“Hang on, Uncle Jack!”
I grabbed the mane of pink fur that ran in a narrow strip from the top of her head to her neck and held on. Terrhi galloped after Zwilniki, using her arms as well as her legs. It seemed to be unwise to underestimate the speed of an angry Dauushan. I hoped she had the endurance to keep up this pace. Since I didn’t have to focus on running I was able to talk directly to Chit and the rest of the team.
“We’re chasing Zwilniki down the main corridor connecting the buildings,” I said. “I’m betting he’s heading to the hanger to try to get off planet.”
“Roger that,” said Poly. “We’re ready at this end. Mike’s in place with the trucks at the loading dock. Your friend was glad to help.”
“Great,” I said. Hearing the real Poly’s voice was like reaching an oasis after crossing the Sahara. “Are you and Spike ready with your surprise?”
“Absolutely. I’ve got the t-shirt auto-cannon locked and loaded. I borrowed it from NACCL’s Atlanta cricket stadium.”
“Can’t wait to see the results. Did Shepherd come through with his part?”
“He’s all ready to manage the cleanup.”
“Excellent,” I said. This should be entertaining. I’d wait until Zwilniki got to the hanger before I added my contribution to the program. Tomáso broke in.
“Lieutenant Lee has Georgia State Patrol and Capitol Police officers standing by, ready to step in once everything is secure. I’ll be with Poly and Spike.”
“Perfect,” I said. “We’ll stay on Zwilniki’s tail to make sure he doesn’t head for one of the other buildings.”
Poly and Tomáso, through Chit, both wished us luck.
“Hey Tomáso,” I said. “Have I ever told you that you have an amazing daughter?”
“Thank you. She takes after her mother.”
“I’ll have to meet her someday.” Terrhi picked up her pace. I expect she was pleased by my compliment.
“Count on it,” said Tomáso. Things were coming together nicely.
“Jack out.”
Chapter 32
“I love it when a plan comes together.” ― “Hannibal” Smith
We were lucky for two key reasons. First, Zwilniki didn’t turn into the subterranean training facility or either of the manufacturing plants. It seemed clear he was heading for the hanger. Second, Terrhi, with the stamina and resilience of youth, had no trouble keeping up with Tony Zed’s chrome-plated Segway. If pressed, I thought she might be able to shift into a different gear and catch him, but I whispered that we wanted to herd him to the hanger, not have it out with him underground. She said, “Okay, Uncle Jack,” and kept a steady pace. I was lucky, personally, as well. Hexapods are easier to ride than quadrupeds—they’ve got a smoother stride.
Zwilniki got to the first hanger elevator, pushed the up button, and rolled aboard as soon as the doors opened. They closed seconds before we arrived. Terrhi didn’t waste any time and started bounding up the stairs, looking more like an exuberant Saint Bernard than a Shetland pony-sized alien. Skip what I said about riding hexapods being smoother. That may be true for level straightaways, but climbing stairs is a different matter. My hands gripped Terrhi’s mane so tightly I was afraid it would come out by the roots and send me flying. She climbed three flights so quickly that we were standing outside the elevator as its doors opened.
“What the…” said Zwilniki.
Terrhi shook her sweetener rifle clubs at him and made a threatening bellow that would have been more intimidating if it had been a few octaves lower. I slid off her back and pointed a recharged stun phone in his direction. Zwilniki hopped off, twisted a knob on his Segway and sent it careening into Terrhi, and Terrhi into me. While we were distracted, Zwilniki ran out onto the floor of the hanger, cutting left and right to make it harder for me to hit him with the stun phone. I decided not to try—the range was getting long—so I pulled my standard cell phone from my pocket.
“Operation Vegas—make it so.”
“My pleasure,” said my phone.
The hanger was immediately filled with the sound of groaning metal. All 144 Orishen troop transports were converting to the new configuration I’d programmed, one that had helped me pay for graduate school. The ships’ floor plans were changing to accommodate stations for games of chance popular on twenty planets. The new casino format didn’t have room for troops, just gamblers. Forced out by the transition, soldiers began streaming down the ships’ gangways, milling about and looking like so many particles in Brownian motion. Zwilniki was one particle among thousands.
I made sure Terrhi was okay and told her to get into the elevator where she’d be safe from the soldiers, and everything else.
“But Uncle Jack, I want to stay and help!”
“You’ll have plenty of ch
ances to help in a few minutes. For now, just watch and wait. You’ll like what happens.”
“O-kay.”
No one can say “okay” like a pre-adolescent.
I closed the elevator door and called Poly.
“Hi Jack!” Her voice sounded like summer fireworks, sparkling and colorful and loud.
“It’s time for Mike to do his thing.” I heard a few beeps from her cell phone as she brought Mike in on a three-way call. His mission was to pick up a special cargo from my friend at KudZooKrew.com and arrange for some minor reprogramming.
“Operation Exponent-Lock—make it so.”
“Will do, Jack,” said Mike. “Stand by.”
Ten loading dock doors opened and ten 18-wheelers disgorged their contents into the hanger. A hundred thousand hungry rabbots entered the space between the ships, mingling with the soldiers and eating everything organic—but not alive—in their path. There were ten pink rabbots for every trooper in Dauushan Ranger camouflage. They spread out like swarming locusts. Most went after the closest thing they could reach and within seconds nearly every soldier’s boots had been gnawed to leather tatters. Many soldiers had lost all the fabric in their uniforms below the knee. Some enthusiastic rabbots had managed to reach even higher. Soldiers were screaming and running around like decapitated chickens. It was pink chaos. I used my phone to transmit a localized rabbot avoidance signal so I didn’t have to climb the walls.
I heard a noise behind me. Terrhi was knocking on the narrow elevator window.
“Can I come out now, please, Uncle Jack? I want a better view.”
“Sure. You’re going to like this part.” She opened the door and joined me.
It was time for Phase Three. I was still on the line with Poly.
“Operation Spike’s Bane—make it so.”
“Here we come!” said Poly.
Another loading dock door opened and Poly and Spike and Tomáso charged into the hanger. Poly and Spike were riding in a makeshift howdah that held the t-shirt auto-cannon borrowed from the cricket stadium. From her high vantage on Tomáso’s back Poly had great sight-lines. She aimed the cannon at a clump of soldiers and pulled the trigger. A square of pink cotton cloth shot out and unfurled, dropping more than fifty prickly pink seed pods on the floor. Unfortunate soldiers stepped on them with their bare feet and screamed. They hopped up and down, colliding with their comrades and knocking them to the floor where they were pierced by burr-covered pods as well, creating a chain reaction of confusion and pain. I knew how they felt. Tomáso kept moving and Poly kept firing.
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