“I’m pleased for you.” Maddie managed a smile. “I truly am. He’s such a good man. Pop wouldn’t mind one bit, and neither do I. It’s just… I never guessed.” Shaking her head, she laughed. “So you felt responsible for me, and I felt responsible for you. What a pair we are!” She hurried around the table and gave the older woman a warm hug. “I’m sure you’ll be very happy.”
Gran gazed up at her, a hopeful smile curving her face. “And I hope you’ll be happy, too. You will marry Brad again, won’t you?”
Maddie loosed a low breath. “I don’t know, Gran. I just don’t know.”
Even when Pat and Susanna returned to the store, could she leave the lake and the life she loved? Or would the pressures of living in the city and Brad’s endless work hours shrivel her love for him, as they had before?
Chapter 12
Later that evening, after a huge festive meal, Brad looked around the dining table. At Maddie, laughing as she straightened Jacob’s paper hat, fallen over his eyes. At Liz and Hiram, giggling over a silly joke from their Christmas cracker like a pair of teenagers.
Liz glanced at him and smiled. “I hope you don’t mind two Christmases. My family is Norwegian, so our big celebration was Christmas Eve. When Pete and I married, he wanted to keep his family traditions on Christmas Day. So we did both.”
Brad grinned. “Having two celebrations is an unmissable treat.”
When they’d been married, he’d never understood the fuss Maddie wanted to make about Christmas. Growing up, his dad was too busy and his mother too gone on martinis to care, though he hadn’t figured that out till he was older. They’d dutifully exchanged gifts on Christmas morning, followed by Mom drinking steadily over lunch at her favorite restaurant. Then Dad rushed off to his office to provide emergency liposuction to any starlets worried they’d gained half a pound.
Then once Dad traded Mom in for a succession of younger wives, better ads for his business, Brad became the redheaded stepchild as their kids took center stage.
Bitterness chewed at him. He didn’t want to get stuck in blame, but some role models he’d had to prepare him for marriage and fatherhood.
Since he’d seen how Maddie’s family did Christmas Eve, he understood a little more. Saying grace wasn’t a rote thing here, but a genuine expression of thanks to God. The candle, up high and safely out of Jacob’s reach, a way to remember the light of the world. A true faith, as well as love, shone around the table. And then there were the fun, unusual traditions, like the Christmas crackers.
No wonder she didn’t want to leave.
Jacob waved the one remaining Christmas cracker at him. “Pull it with me, Daddy. You haven’t got a paper hat.” The boy used both hands to hold the end of the cardboard tube and scrunched his face up ready for the bang. As it popped, a silver-colored ring fell onto the table, with a plastic “diamond” that would weigh at least a carat if it was real.
He handed it to Jacob. “You won.”
Excited, Jacob passed it to Maddie. “Look, Mommy! A diamond ring. Please wear it. You don’t have one.”
Maddie smiled indulgently and squeezed the child-sized ring onto her little finger before making a show of admiring it. “It’s beautiful. Thank you.” She dropped a kiss on Jacob’s head.
Her eyes met Brad’s. Was she thinking the same thing? That she’d had a diamond ring, and she’d FedExed it back to him, along with her wedding ring.
How naïve they’d been, that summer evening at the boathouse. He’d asked her to marry him two weeks after they’d met, offering his great-grandmother’s engagement ring. Their hopes and dreams and crazy-in-love emotions blinded them to all their differences and the challenges of making a marriage work.
“Have another cookie.” Liz held out a plate of the beautifully decorated cookies Maddie made earlier.
He raised his hands. “They’re delicious. But I can’t eat anything more.” Clutching his belly, he sat back and groaned theatrically. “I’ll need hours in the gym back in the city to work off all the good food you and Maddie have fed me.”
“I’ll have one, Gran.” Jacob reached for a cookie shaped like a snowflake. A chipmunk grin bunched his round cheeks. “Thank you, Mommy, for making these.”
She beamed. “No trouble. I love baking.”
Regret tightened Brad’s smile. The apartment had only a tiny kitchen, too small to do much more than reheat take-out and make coffee. They’d agreed, five years there, and then they could afford a house. She’d stuck to the deal and never complained. It wasn’t till he saw her in the kitchen here he realized how much she must have missed it.
Mom had hated cooking. On the housekeeper’s day off, she’d insisted on eating out. He’d assumed Maddie would want the same, thought he was doing the right thing by getting take-out or going to a restaurant rather than asking her to cook.
If by some miracle she moved back to the city, they’d need to talk about what they both truly wanted. Really talk. No more assumptions. He could buy them a house in the suburbs now, with a family kitchen like this cottage.
Though that “if” was a big one. With her gran’s health issues and minding the store keeping her here, the best-case scenario was a long wait for her to come to him. The worst, that she wouldn’t ever leave the lake. He’d seen how she belonged here.
In that case, he’d need to work out how to visit more often, and convince Maddie to come to him more often, too. Jacob deserved better than a once-a-season dad.
“Let’s go to the living room,” Maddie said, smiling. “The washing up can wait.”
The Christmas lights flickered so brightly on the ceiling-high tree, they had no need of any other lights. Jacob’s eyes widened. “More presents!”
Maddie must have sneaked the gifts around the tree while he and Jacob weren’t looking. She chuckled, but raised a warning hand. “Only one tonight. The rest tomorrow.”
“Ohhhh!” He stared at the parcels in blue cartoon paper, obviously his, reaching first for one, then another, and hesitating. Too much choice.
“I still have one more to bring down. Maybe you should wait till you see it before you decide?” Maddie grinned. Whatever she’d kept back must be good.
“I need to bring mine down, too.” Brad stood.
“I’ll help you.” Jacob ran past him to the first step then stopped, looking back to him for permission, eyes alight.
Brad glanced at Maddie, holding back his automatic, “Sure,” till he spotted her tiny nod.
Jacob insisted on carrying Brad’s bag of gifts, though it was almost as big as he was. Seeing his son’s head held high in pride over helping as he dragged it along, Brad couldn’t refuse, though he stiffened as Jacob bumped it down the stairs. Everything was well packed. Nothing should break.
He hoped.
Maddie peeped around the edge of her door to ensure Jacob had gone before hauling out a gift almost as tall as her, and as wide.
“You look like Jacob did, carrying my bag.” Chuckling, he hurried to lift one end, careful not to tear the snowflake-patterned paper. “Good thing we really aren’t competing. Trunkie takes second place in the super-sized gift department.”
The wide grin lighting her face held as much mischief as Jacob’s. “I wish I could claim I planned it that way, but I decided on this present for him before Thanksgiving.” Then her expression stilled, became intent. “I want to tell you how much I appreciate you being here. Having you with him for the holidays means so much to Jacob.”
“I’m glad to be here, with you both.” Her approval warmed him, glowing like a flame. Though he could wish she was glad for herself, not just for Jacob. “Later, once he’s in bed, could we talk?”
Nodding, she glanced away, but he’d glimpsed her blue eyes widening. Surely, she must guess what he hoped to ask her. The best Christmas gift would be seeing a real diamond on her ring finger, not just the glitter of the plastic one from the cracker on her pinky. Her wearing her engagement ring again.
A voice pipe
d up from downstairs. “Mommy, Daddy, come on! We can’t open any presents till you get here.”
Maddie laughed. “We’re coming, Mr. Impatient.”
Now wasn’t the time to get deep and meaningful. Instead, they wrestled the awkward package around the bend in the stairs. He was almost as eager as Jacob to see what hid under the wrappings.
Jacob waited for them. Wide-eyed and open-mouthed, he stared. “Is that for me?” Wonder rang in his voice and lit his astonished face.
“It is.” Maddie paused as she reached the hallway and smiled. “But you don’t have to open it tonight. It can wait till tomorrow if you want.”
Brad could guess their son’s answer.
“This one, this one, this one!” Jacob jumped and punched his little fists in the air.
“Okay, but let’s get it into the living room first, so Gran and Hiram can watch, too.” Maddie moved to lift it, but Brad stopped her.
“Let me.”
No argument. She stepped back and gestured for him to enter the room first.
He laid the gift on the floor, and then edged around it to reach a seat.
Hiram chuckled as Liz clutched her hands to her chest theatrically. “Oh my, what a huge present! Could that be for me?”
“Sorry, Gran. It’s for me.” All serious, Jacob rushed to her side and patted her knee, looking up at her. “I’ll let you play with it, promise. But I don’t know what it is yet.”
Laughter shook Maddie’s shoulders and bounced her glowing ponytail. “You will in a minute. Go for it, Peanut. It’s okay to rip the paper.”
Gleeful, Jacob didn’t hold back. Swiftly tearing off the wrapping, he revealed a traditional wooden sled on runners. Wordless for once, he just stared at it.
Brad did, too. He’d only seen sleds like that in movies or on Christmas cards and certainly never used one. Something else to add to the list of things he’d be depriving his son of if he asked them to move to the city.
Though L.A. offered the ocean and the zoo and a choice of schools. More kids his age to play with. Chicago offered plenty, too. He had to remind himself — it wasn’t all one-sided. The move would give Jacob and Maddie as much as it took away.
As if concerned Jacob’s silence meant he didn’t like the gift, Maddie burst into explanation. “You’re old enough this year to sled on your own, instead of being towed in the pull sled. You can ride and steer this by yourself.” She showed him how the foot bar worked.
“Thank you, Mommy. I love it.” Jacob threw his arms around her, and then jumped on the sled, moving the steering bar with his feet and pulling on the red rope handle like he was reining in a horse. “When can I use it?”
Maddie smiled. “Tomorrow. Every day, if the weather is right, and there’s someone to go out with you. The hill behind the house is a safe starter slope. But you need to wear your helmet and always have a grown-up with you. Break those rules, and the sled gets locked away.”
He nodded. “Gran can use it, ’cuz I promised.”
“Thank you.” Liz ruffled his hair. “I’ve ridden that sled many, many times. It was mine as a girl. I gave it to Maddie’s father, and then it passed to Maddie when she was about your age. And now she’s given it to you.”
More Calder family history to weigh heavy on Brad. Another reminder of what he couldn’t offer. He could write his family traditions in a text message and still have characters to spare. “Make money. Succeed. Look good.” Not a lot else.
Jacob jumped off the sled and hugged her. “Thank you, Gran.” Then he turned to Brad. “Will you come with me, Daddy? We could ride it together.”
“Of course.” Though he’d need to get Maddie or someone else to give him a crash course — hopefully not involving any actual crashes — before he showed Jacob his ignorance of sledding and put the boy at risk.
“Every day? Promise?” Jacob persisted.
“Every day for the rest of this year, I promise.” That wasn’t an exaggeration. He was here till the New Year. “Then I have to go back to work in the city. Too far away to go sledding with you.” A knife twisted in his heart at the thought of leaving.
But he had to. For them. The next big promotion was so close he could almost taste the sweetness of success. The pay raise meant a bigger monthly child support check for Maddie. And he’d save the rest for that house in the suburbs.
If he’d blown his chances with his boss by taking this time off, he’d just try twice as hard when the next opportunity came along. He’d vowed to his dad he’d make it to the top in hospital management, and he meant it.
Jacob pouted a little. “Poor Daddy. That doesn’t sound like fun.”
No. It wasn’t. Working hard to achieve and to provide for them was necessary, but not fun.
Thankfully, Maddie distracted Jacob before the pout progressed to anything more. “Gran’s turn to open a gift.” She peeked at Brad, a plea in her gaze. “Perhaps Jacob could give her yours, Brad?”
Eager to help, Jacob dragged over the bag with Brad’s gifts. “Here they are.”
“Thank you.” Brad smiled appreciation at his son, and then smiled over his head at Maddie, too. She’d done a great job teaching the boy. He selected a square box from the bag and handed it to Jacob. “Liz, I hope you’ll get a chuckle when you see it.” Jacob carried it two handed and presented it to her like a king bearing gold, frankincense, or myrrh.
Liz shook the palm-sized box. “Hmm. It’s light, and it makes no sound.”
“It’s not supposed to.” Brad grinned. So it hadn’t broken on its bumpy ride down the stairs.
She tugged off the ribbon and started on the wrapping. Then his cell phone rang in his coat pocket, out in the hall.
He grimaced. The irritating ring couldn’t be ignored. He should have switched it off. “Sorry, that’s my phone. Open your present. I’ll tell whoever it is to have a happy Christmas and call back next week.”
The caller display suggested it might not be that easy. His boss. Still in the office, on Christmas Eve.
What was it about “vacation” the corporation didn’t understand?
Three little words. Time. Off. Work. They weren’t in the business dictionary.
“Merry Christmas, Harry!” He kept his tone cheerful, though he could see another late-night report needing an urgent assessment coming his way.
“Brad. The promotion is yours. We need you back in the office bright and early on the twenty-sixth when the big guns from head office arrive.” No preliminaries. No congratulations. No acknowledgment Christmas was different from any other day. Harry may as well have replied “Bah humbug.”
He’d imagined this day, and the champagne-cork-popping exultation. Instead, the promotion weighed on him like a lead straitjacket.
“Is there any alternative? I promised my son I’d be here till New Year’s Day.” Brad knew the answer before the words left his mouth.
“Your kid won’t remember. Promises like that are made to be broken. There’s only room for people who are committed at this level. It’s make or break time, Brad. Fumble the ball now, and that’s it. You only get one chance to play in the major league.” The stream of clichés ended.
Brad’s stomach roiled. It wasn’t a clear-cut choice. Not Maddie, or the promotion. He could turn it down, and he still wouldn’t have her. All refusing would do was make him a two-time loser.
Sure, she still cared for him. But he saw in ways he’d never recognized just how strongly her life tied to this place. He’d fantasized a house in the ’burbs, but like the wild mountain huckleberry, she wouldn’t thrive anywhere but here.
He couldn’t ask her to leave.
And he couldn’t give up his one shot at the top, either.
“I’ll be there,” he said.
There’d be an afternoon flight. He’d get Christmas morning here, even take Jacob out sledding, the way he’d promised. Then, he’d say goodbye.
Chapter 13
As she turned off the kitchen tap and swished the suds in the sink,
Maddie wondered how long it would take Brad to open up about whatever was wrong. They’d had so little practice at that. Maybe he didn’t trust her enough yet to open up to her at all.
When Gran volunteered them to wash up while she and Hiram bathed Jacob and put him to bed, her intent to give them some private time together had been clear. Just in case Maddie missed the hint, Gran’s grin and wink as she clicked the kitchen door firmly behind them made it all too obvious.
But Gran clearly hadn’t picked up on Brad’s undercurrent of tension. This wouldn’t be the warm friendly one-to-one she envisaged.
Oh, he’d laughed and chatted like usual. Hung the Hummel ornament of a boy riding a sled he’d given Gran high on the tree, after everyone oohed and ahhed over the coincidence. Said all the right things about Gran’s gift for him, a glossy coffee-table book of photographs of the lake. Admired Jacob’s gift for her, a bracelet of chunky clay beads Claire helped him make in Sunday school.
But a hollow echo reverberated through Brad’s laughter, and it never quite warmed his eyes.
Taking a deep breath to gather strength, she knew she had to ask. In the past, she would have stayed silent, said nothing, but that hadn’t helped either of them. “Brad, what’s bothering you? You’ve been different since you came back from taking that call.”
The smile stretching his lips was so obviously fake, she wished he hadn’t tried. His shoulders stiffened, and he glanced away.
So she’d been right. Whatever he replied wouldn’t be anything she’d want to hear.
“It was my boss, Harry. He offered me the promotion I’ve been working toward.” He didn’t attempt to inject any enthusiasm into his tone. So different from the king-of-the-world triumph he’d shown with his other promotions.
“Did you accept it?” Caution edged her carefully neutral words. She couldn’t dare to dream his flat disappointed response meant he’d reined back his ambition to reach the top. Finally realized there was more to life than work.
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