by Brill Harper
I feast my eyes on him, looking at him in a new way. I’m excited. Nervous, but excited.
“I’m going to suck you off, Wylder. Is that okay?”
He groans.
“Is that a yes?”
“Fuck, are you really going to suck my cock, Colt?” he asks, his breathing so shallow and his muscles so tense.
“Yes. I really am. And I’m going to do a fucking good job of it, too.”
He chuckles. “Go ahead, then. Suck me.”
I find myself trembling with desire as I kneel in front of him. It takes me a few minutes to get the hang of it. I didn’t realize there were so many things my partners had to keep track of when pleasing me. Keeping my mouth open but my teeth out of the way, bobbing my head, using my hand, not gagging, and somehow breathing all at the same time. But I know what feels good to me, so I just aim for that.
He groans. “That's it. That’s so good,” he tells me like he knows I’ll get off on the praise. He’s not wrong. Something inside me has gone from “interesting experiment” to “be the best cocksucker ever if you’re going to do it.”
My gaze strays to Bliss at one point, and Wylder palms my cheek. “Keep your eyes on me, cowboy.” The eye contact is intense. He sees too much, he’s too in my head, but I keep my eyes locked and his dick in my mouth. “That’s perfect. You’re going to make me come. Is that what you want?”
I moan around his cock, and he hisses between his teeth at the vibration. I do want him to come. I want him to lose that fucking control he holds so tightly to and lose himself in me. I want to make my mouth the center of his world. I’m getting pulled into a new realm and it’s scary and fucking exciting.
Wylder pulls my hair so his balls slap against my chin while urging me to suck harder. No finesse. No ease. He’s asserting his power, showing me what he can make me do. “You love it, don't you?”
I moan around his massive dick again in answer. He closes his eyes and stretches his neck back. I may be on my knees, but he's all mine at this moment. He's completely under my control now.
I pull him out of my mouth but keep a firm grip on his shaft. Too firm, but he’s not complaining. My tongue swirls around his heavy sac, tasting him, knowing him so intimately now.
I tried to tell myself when we first started this threesome with Bliss that it was just sex, and sex feels good and it doesn’t matter if there are accidental touches or things get too close. All that mattered was pleasure and our girl. But it matters a lot. It matters to me that this is Wylder in my hands, under my tongue. It’s his scent wrapping around my senses. It doesn’t take anything away from what I feel for Bliss. If anything, it makes me feel stronger about the both of them.
This wouldn’t be happening with anyone else. It has to be Bliss and Wylder. It will always be Bliss and Wylder. She needs to be part of this. “Darlin’, you’re too far away over there.”
“I want to watch.”
“You can watch. I just want you close by.” I need them both right now.
She settles next to me on the floor, and I lick back up my best friend’s rod, moving up to the swollen, dark head. I slide him back into my mouth. His moans get louder, raspier. I'm ravenous now, sucking on him with total abandon.
“You're going to make me come. Is that what you want?”
I moan around him again. I need it.
Bliss rubs my back. “Yes, Wylder. We want you to come.”
“I'm going to give you what you want, Colt. I'm going to fill your throat. Fuck!” He roars as his orgasm erupts in my mouth, filling me. Over and over he squirts, each shudder adding more. Jesus, how do people do this? There’s so much cum. I’m trying to swallow it down without choking. I remember Bliss taking all of me down that first night and I’m in even more awe of her now.
I’ve tasted him before, not this much at once, but in the weeks we’ve been part of a triad, there have been traces of him left behind when I kiss Bliss or get her pussy ready with my tongue for another round.
But drinking him in is so satisfying, it’s only now that I am reminded of my own need to come.
I’m hot and aching to feel him inside me. But I’m not ready for that just yet.
“That was amazing,” Bliss says. She kisses me deeply, taking into her the taste of our lover’s cum. God. I need to come. Now. I pull her onto my lap and thrust into her tight, wet sheath. She comes fast when I add pressure to her clit, her inner muscles squeezing me as she rides out some good, hard bounces.
I flip her over and grab her hips, pulling her straight back onto me, wrapping her pretty, dark hair around my fist and pulling her head back. “Tell me you’re staying with us,” I demand, fucking her almost violently.
“I’m staying. I’m never leaving. Oh, God.”
Wylder shakes off his come-coma and slides to his knees in front of her, lifting her chin so she’ll look at him. “Oh, he’s fucking you hard, kitten. Do you like that? Your poor little pussy.”
“Oh, God.” She’s trying really hard to keep looking at him, but I’m hammering her hard and her body is getting jerked back and forth. “I love it. I love what you both do to me so much.”
I’m holding out as long as I can. Wylder and I make eye contact and my spine starts tingling.
“Fuck her, Colt. Fuck our woman. Make her come again all over your cock.”
I grunt, trying to get even deeper.
“Stretch out that sweet pussy. Jesus, she’s taking that big, thick dick, isn’t she? Are you going to come again, angel?”
I pull her hair and he holds her throat the way she likes. She likes feeling owned by us. That’s when she feels the freest to be completely uninhibited. She stirs every dark desire I ever had. Makes me feel so rough. I grip her hip in my hand so firmly I know I’ll be leaving my mark on her. Her inner muscles clench, squeezing me until I can’t hold back any longer. As she comes, I pour all of myself into her. She’s changed everything, the catalyst to the fire that consumes us all now. I wrap my arms around her chest and press her tightly against me with a satisfied groan, my own breath sawing sharp edges into my lungs. “Did I hurt you?”
“No, well, yes, but the good kind. I’m good. I promise.”
“You’re better than good, darlin’.”
We sit up and Wylder wraps a blanket around her shoulders. He meets my eyes and the floor drops out from under me. He’s looking at me with something new. It’s almost fragile, vulnerable. For a man who’d do just about anything not to be vulnerable to anyone or anything, it means something. Something I guess I’ve been working toward since the day we met. I know already that he trusts me, that he’d do anything for me, but there’s always been a piece of him that he held back.
I may have given him a blow job, but with that one look, he just gave me everything.
Chapter Thirteen
Bliss
Three months later
I’m surprised to find my men at the kitchen table when I come in from the farmer’s market. “Oh, good, I could use some brawny manpower to help with the big box of squash I got at...the...” my words trail off when I realize they are not alone. I set the bag down carefully, willing my knees to stop shaking. My heart wobbles against my ribs. I think I might throw up. “Mom, what are you doing here?”
Her voice rasps out, “Is that any way to say hello to your mother?” To Wylder she says, “Well, I guess we were always more like sisters anyway.”
Colt stands up and comes to the doorway I’m still stuck in, providing support immediately just by standing at my side. I must look like I’m going to fall over. I certainly feel like it. I guess I just never anticipated my past meeting my present like this. I think I hoped it would never happen at all.
My mother looks like a light breeze could blow her away. She’s skeletal thin, her blonde hair frizzy on the edges, but two inches of dark roots means she hasn’t even been able to afford drugstore hair dye for a few months. Or she’s given up caring.
She’s wearing long sleeves, but the way
she keeps scratching at her arms is a clue to how messed up she is.
How did she even find me? I’ve only communicated with her by text for the last year. And that’s only if she doesn’t run out of minutes. Which she hasn’t this summer because I filled her phone card several times.
“This is a sweet set-up you have here, baby girl. I hope these nice young men have been taking care of you.”
That’s what she thinks men are for. To take care of her. She told me when I was sixteen years old that pussy was currency for survival. She paid for things she needed in trade, things like the rent. That same night, she told me sucking cock was for life’s little luxuries. That’s how she afforded cigarettes and vodka. She was convinced she was being a good mother by telling me how life really is. That I should get what I could while I was still young and my currency was worth the most.
By the time I got out of the trailer, she was trading her body for drugs mostly.
“I’m so proud of you, baby girl.” Her words are like a slap. All my life, I waited for those words. Pride in me, even an interest in my life. But now the words are unwelcome.
“You should be proud,” Wylder says. He’s sizing her up, taking her measure. He’s holding his body loose, like he’s totally relaxed, but I can tell he’s coiled up tight inside and ready to spring if need be.
“Mom, why are you here?”
“Well, baby girl, you had so many nice things to say about this place. How much you loved the fresh air. You’re right, it sure is beautiful here.” She’s not looking out the window, and she’s not looking at me. She’s looking at Colt standing next to me. “You sure have done well for yourself. Surprised me, even. I figured you’d waste away your youth in a dark office with only your computer to keep you company. And here you are, in a mansion with two handsome cowboys all to yourself.”
“Mom...”
“Such a good girl. You always were, though. A little goody two-shoes. But now look at you.”
I feel the blood leaving my face. She thinks I’m trading my pussy like currency. She thinks I’m just like her. Am I?
“Ms. Camden, you seem like a real nice lady,” Wylder starts in his cold, commanding voice, “so I’m sure you just haven’t noticed that you are distressing your daughter.”
She’s cowed by his voice. Who isn’t? Well, I’m not. Not really. Well, okay, sometimes. But only in bed.
“Guys, I still have groceries in the Jeep. If you wouldn’t mind...”
Colt’s body tightens next to me. “I think one of us should stay in here with you and your guest.”
“I’m fine.”
“Of course she’s fine. I’m her mother. She couldn’t be safer with anyone than she is with me.”
I see Wylder struggle to not pick her up and throw her out the window. I’m not doing a very good job of hiding my uneasiness at being with my mom. They are not her biggest fans, either.
Reluctantly, they go out to the Jeep leaving me alone with the woman who raised me to be afraid of my own sexuality. “Why are you really here?”
“Which one are you fucking?”
I close my eyes. “Do you need money? What?”
“I know you’re not fucking them both. Hell, I’m surprised you nabbed one. You must have finally taken my lessons to heart. My guess is Mr. Colt. The other one would eat you up and spit you out.” She coughs too long and too harshly. All those luxuries she got on her knees for must be catching up to her lungs. “He won’t marry you,” she says finally. “Not that you don’t have fine birthing hips and all, but a man like that isn’t going to marry the fat cook, so I hope you’re doing better than I did at saving for a rainy day. Of course, you don’t have the handicap of having to raise a kid at the same time.”
My blood turns to ice. “Handicap?”
“No offense.”
I have to fight the urge to run to my room and hide. But I’m not a kid anymore. This is my home, not hers. “I took none of your lessons to heart, Mom. I’m nothing like you.”
She moves fast. One minute she’s in the chair, next she’s standing in front of me poking my chest. “You’re just like me. I know you always thought you were better than me, but you’re just as much a whore as I ever was. Maybe now you’ll have some respect. You think I enjoyed fucking Greasy Greg when I didn’t have enough money for rent? You think I liked blowing all the fat, married men whose wives wouldn’t do it? I hated every minute on my knees. But that’s what we got to work with in this life.”
“You’re sick. I mean that literally, Mom. There is something wrong in your head and you tried your best to make it wrong in mine, too, didn’t you? Would it make you feel better if I turned into the town tramp instead of a college graduate? Would you like it better if I had an unplanned pregnancy like you did? Well, sorry, I’m not going to turn out like you. And when I have kids, I’ll make sure they have security and love.”
Her nostrils flare. “He won’t marry you. He’ll get tired of fucking you eventually, and then you’ll lose this cushy job. The one you quit school over, so don’t get so high and mighty with me, Ms. “College Graduate.” And then you’ll either live in a trailer in town, I saw some behind the tavern. Or you’ll move back in with me thinking I’ll help you raise your little brat. That’s the life we get. That’s where our genetics take us. So you might want to think twice about talking shit about me now in case you need me later.”
The idea of her near any child of mine brings maternal instincts I didn’t know I had right to the front. “You will never even see any children I have. I don’t know why I’ve been sending you money while I’ve been at school and here. I don’t know why I ever thought I needed to keep in contact with you or make sure you were all right. I thought I had some obligation, I guess. But the last few months have really taught me that everything about you is unhealthy. You don’t know how to love. Not yourself and certainly not your own child.” I take a deep breath like I’ve been drowning for years and just got to the surface. “But I do know how to love. And I know that I have to love myself in order to really love someone else. I know that now because two men, yes both of them, mother, showed me what I was worth. Every day, they show me.”
“How am I the tramp if you’re the one fucking two men?”
“You have warped ideas about sex and you did your best to warp mine. But giving yourself to someone is different from trading your body for something.”
The skin across her face is stretched so tight I worry that her cheekbones are going to poke through. “You ungrateful little bitch.”
The slap across my face shocks me more than hurts me. She doesn’t have much strength. Not like she used to. Not like the good old days.
If anything, she just slapped some sense into me.
“I’m going to marry them both, Mama. And we’re all three going to live in this big happy house filled with as many babies as they’ll give me. I’m going to enter my blueberry pie into the state fair and learn to ride a horse properly. I’ll finish my degree because I’m smart and too close to walk away from it, but I won’t be moldering away in a dark office. I’ll use my accounting skills to help my husbands run this place. I’m going to be just fine, despite you. Because I love them both more than anything and they’ve taught me how to trust them and trust myself.”
A masculine throat clearing brings my attention to the door where both my men are standing with their hearts in their eyes. Colt addresses my mother, “Ms. Camden, a taxi will meet you out front to take you back to town. The bus leaves town in the morning, but we paid for a room for you across from the station for the night. You’re not to come back to the ranch.”
“You’re dead to me. I shoulda left you in a dumpster when I had you.” She bristles when Wylder grabs her arm gently to steer her out of the kitchen but goes. He’s kind of hard to argue with.
As soon as she’s gone, my legs give out. Colt is right there, scooping me up and carrying me to the bathroom. While he’s running the bath, Wylder comes in. His eyes are so
ft when he kneels in front of me. “I’m so proud of you, kitten. That was amazing.”
“You guys are amazing. I would never have been able to do that if it weren’t for you. I love you both so much. I don’t know what’s kept me from saying I love you all this time, I knew it from the beginning, I think. I’m sorry you had to hear it that way instead of me just saying the words.”
Colt kneels next to Wylder. They both have a hand on each of my knees. “I love you, darlin’. I always will. And Wylder, I’m in love with you, too. I don’t know if I’d say it was from the beginning. I’ve always loved you, but now, it’s more. It has been for a while.”
Wylder looks at Colt’s hand on my knee, but not at either of our faces. “Hell, the two of you are like thorns in my side.” He puts his hand over Colt’s. “After the night when...when everything was taken from me, I slipped into a dark place. A place where the only voice I heard was Colt trying to bring me back.” He finally raises his eyes to Colt’s face. “You saved my life. You dragged my ass back into the light even though I didn’t want it. I knew what I felt after that was more than friendship, but I didn’t know what to call it. How to feel about it. And I didn’t want to feel too much anyway. I thought I’d be better off just working hard and making my folks proud when they looked down on me.” He looks at me then. “And then we got a sassy little housekeeper.” I smile. “Bliss, you made us brave enough to open our hearts. I love you and I love Colt. And that damn bathtub is about to spill over the edge.”
Colt hurries to turn the water off. “Do you mean it, Wylder? I know we’ve both been okay with fooling around, but do you really love me?”
Wylder stands, bringing me up with him. “Of course I do. Now about this getting married and filling the house with babies...”
I cover my face. “You heard the whole thing?”
“I heard every detail of my dream life repeated to me in your voice,” Colt says. “I’d be the happiest man alive if we all got married and filled this house with babies and blueberry pie.”