by Izzy Shows
That was as it should be.
I flipped through the pages until I got to my old place. Then I started to read again, losing myself in the subject matter.
It was rich information, things I’d never known before.
Conall wasn’t someone I’d talked to regularly, and none of the other wolves had wanted anything to do with me. None of them had even mentioned a vampire-werewolf war, but in retrospect, it was pretty obvious that the two big supernatural species would have it in for one another.
Especially considering that Conall was still waging a guerrilla war of his own.
I don’t know how much time passed, but I made it through a few chapters before my time was interrupted.
Three thralls—Kati, Isabella, and Jenn—entered the room, Kati in the lead.
She was the ringleader of a mean girls group among the thralls. I tried to give her as wide a berth as possible, but she didn’t like me, for the same reason most of the other thralls didn’t like me.
Grayson hadn’t touched me.
“Well, if it isn’t perfect little Nina,” Kati said.
I sighed, shutting the book. I was really getting sick of all the ‘little’ comments. Yes, I was petite, but did everyone have to comment on it all the time?
You didn’t mind it so much when Grayson called you ‘little hunter.’
Shut up, shut up, shut up!
“What is it now, Kati?”
“Oh, nothing. We were just coming in for a bit of air.”
I frowned. “Well, then, I’ll give you your space.”
I stood up, intending to leave the room to avoid a confrontation.
“Why would you do that? Shouldn’t we get to know one another?” Isabella asked, a sweet smile on her lips.
Hmph.
“I think we know each other pretty well at this point,” I said.
“Oh, I would disagree,” Kati said. “I don’t understand you at all.”
I lifted my chin. “What could you possibly not understand?”
“Well, I mean... What’s wrong with you?” She giggled.
“Ah, nothing?”
Jenn interjected this time. “Oh, there has to be something wrong with you. The King still hasn’t touched you, and that means you must be deficient in some way.”
“No, it doesn’t. He’s just being nice.”
I didn’t really believe that, but it was the excuse he was giving me, so I might as well stick to it.
“Nice, hm?”
The three of them smirked as one, sharing a look together.
“It sounds to me like he doesn’t like you. He’s probably regretting his decision.”
“Why are you giving me such a hard time about this? It’s not like I can do anything about it.”
“Oh, we know. We were just wondering what it is about you that’s so thoroughly disgusted him.”
I flinched.
That actually hurt.
I knew I shouldn’t let their words get to me, but they had a point. Either Grayson was playing mind games with me, or he didn’t want me. And I should be happy with the latter option, shouldn’t I? I should be happy that he didn’t want to touch me, because that made this whole experience that much easier.
If no one ever fed on me, I wouldn’t have to worry about being tracked down later, after this was all over.
That had been the biggest risk with taking this assignment—that whoever took me as a thrall would always know where I was.
But the solution had simply been that I’d eventually kill whoever I was enthralled to.
The King having Chosen me made things a little more complicated. It wasn’t like I could go around killing the King of vampires.
That would start a huge war, and then where would we be?
I huffed out a sigh.
“Look, this is really getting old. I get it. You don’t like me because he hasn’t fed on me, but that’s out of my hands. Can I go now?”
I took a step forward, and Kati matched it, closing in on me.
Her smile was sickly sweet as her gaze flicked over me. “It doesn’t matter. You won’t last long in this world. You don’t belong here.”
I pushed past her and walked out of the room.
She was right, of course. I didn’t belong here, but I wasn’t going to be here for much longer.
So, why did that bother me now?
18
Nina
The clink of silverware striking china plates filled the room as Grayson and I ate our dinner in silence.
I was sure he’d intended this to be a more comfortable affair, with conversation filling the room, but that wasn’t how I was. I couldn’t carry on a conversation to save my life—I’d never needed to.
There hadn’t been anyone to talk to in the dungeons or in the compound.
I glanced over at him to find that he was staring at me, and he didn’t even have the decency to avert his eyes when he was caught.
“How has the castle been treating you?” he asked, his tone so very polite.
I arched an eyebrow. “Well, the other thralls are being hurt and everyone’s in an uproar, but no one will tell us what’s going on.”
He flinched. I tried not to let him see how shocking it was that he’d give away an emotion like that.
I put my fork down and straightened my shoulders, glaring across the table at him. “The other thralls are being hurt and I’m not. It isn’t fair,” I said.
As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I regretted my phrasing.
He raised an eyebrow. “I’m sorry. You want to be hurt?”
I flushed. “You know that isn’t what I meant.”
“I can’t control everything everyone does, Nina.”
“You’re the King. That’s exactly what you’re supposed to do.”
Why was I being so bold? It was like my mouth had a mind of its own and was firing off questions and comments that I couldn’t control, that I never should have spoken.
I was pushing a vampire too far. I knew he’d snap at me any minute, and yet I couldn’t make myself calm down. It was absolute bullshit that I was enjoying a position of privilege in the castle, with the only vampire confusing enough to not have touched me yet, while everyone was used and abused by those who owned them.
I was sick of his games. Whatever he had planned, I wanted to be done with it.
“What are you playing at here?” I asked. “Get your people in line. Stop playing mind games with me. Act like the King you’re supposed to be.”
He stood up abruptly, heat in his eyes. I’d never seen so much fury in one person, but he didn’t put words to his feelings.
He stormed out without a backwards glance.
19
Grayson
What was wrong with her?
I stormed through the hallways, uncertain of where I was going, other than away.
No one had spoken to me like she had, never in my life. Even my mother had never been so blunt with me.
Act like the King you’re supposed to be.
The reprimand cut me to the bone.
The King I was supposed to be.
What kind of King was that?
I didn’t know, but I did know I needed to figure it out, and soon. Nina was right—I wasn’t doing a good job of controlling my people or of keeping them safe.
For once, I looked at my actions with a clear and objective mind.
Had I been too lax with my people, in a bid to see them happy?
Did they need a hand more firm than I’d given them?
How could I protect them when I didn’t know what threat we were facing?
Nina was upset that other thralls were being hurt—what did she mean by that?
I clenched my jaw, fighting the impulse to turn to the wall and smash my fist against it. I wanted to vent the anger simmering in my blood, but I knew better than that. I knew I couldn’t do that.
I was grateful that no one else was in the hallway at the moment. There was no one to a
sk me where I was going, or ask that I listen to this one particular thing they had to say.
I didn’t want to spare a moment for anyone.
Breathing in slowly, I forced myself to calm down. It would do no one any good if I gave in to the rage I was feeling.
Rage I had no right to feel. It was good of Nina to question me when no one else would come out and say what they were thinking. She was exactly what I needed right now, no matter how unconventional she was.
A few more breaths, and I was starting to feel like myself again.
I turned and walked back to my chambers, into the outer room that broke off into a living room and dining room. Nina was still sitting at the table, apparently too shocked to have moved.
I regretted my behavior. She shouldn’t have witnessed me losing control in that way.
The King should never lose control.
A tremor rippled across her shoulders. Was she scared of me? It pained me to think that.
I walked across the room to stand behind her.
“I apologize,” I said. “I didn’t mean to behave in such a way.”
She turned to look at me over her shoulder. “To express your feelings, you mean? It’s not healthy to cage them up inside the way you do.”
She wasn’t so afraid that she couldn’t speak her mind, it seemed.
I grinned. “That’s not the way things are done here. The way you spoke to me—I’m not accustomed to it. No one is as blunt as you are.”
“Maybe that’s the problem,” she said. “Maybe that’s what you need.”
“You don’t understand.” I shook my head. “This is a world of politics, of careful movements and even more careful words. How is it you don’t understand that?”
“Because I don’t have time for that,” she said.
She stood up and walked away from me, then took a seat on the couch.
I hesitated, then joined her. “What do you mean?”
“Well, who has time to waste their whole life overthinking what they’re going to say? It sounds like an awful lot of time that could be put to better use. Especially when you consider the amount of time you have to put in, wondering what the other person really meant.”
I marveled at her. How simple her world sounded. I found myself wishing I could be a part of it.
“I don’t think we could survive the world you’re describing.”
“Evolve,” she said with a teasing grin.
My mind was instantly diverted, abandoning all thoughts of polite conversation. The very presence of this woman—her supple form, her red lips—drew me in and made me hunger for what I’d told myself I couldn’t have.
Her tongue flicked out to wet her lips, and it was all I could do to contain the growl that threatened to grow within me.
I wanted her more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life.
I was suddenly painfully aware of how close we were, how her thigh was only inches away from my own. Every move she made—I was hyper-aware of it. The small shifting of her body so that she was turned more fully towards me, the gentle rise and fall of her breasts as she breathed in precious air. The slight tremble of her hands.
“Is something wrong?”
I yanked my gaze away from her lips to meet her deep brown eyes once again, and found confusion there.
A stray lock of black hair had fallen against her cheek, and I brushed it to the side, leaning in as if I were being driven by some unknown force.
Mere inches separated our faces, and she stared back at me, her breath coming fast now, before she turned away from me.
I could hear her heart hammering in her chest.
Fear or desire?
Logic dictated that it was fear.
It was only logical that a woman who clearly knew so little of the vampire world would be afraid of me. I was a predator to her kind, and she had probably been raised to fear me.
Then, why had she chosen this life?
I had so many questions for her, and she’d said that I should speak more openly. At least with her.
But a lifetime of decorum caged me. The words died before I could give voice to them.
I leaned back, giving her the space she clearly desired. “Nina.”
She turned and looked at me, some unknown emotion in her eyes.
“I will never touch you if you don’t want me to,” I said, cursing myself as I said the words.
Of course, I’d told myself the same thing countless times already. But vocalizing it, saying it to her—that was a different beast entirely. A promise I couldn’t take back.
She shook her head, her eyebrows drawing together. “I don’t understand.”
“What is there to understand?”
“Why?” She stood up, her hands balling into little fists for a moment before she flexed them. “What game are you playing with me? You have to stop, right now. Stop with the mind games, because I’m not going to survive them. Let the other shoe drop, already.”
Her chest rose and fell heavily with every breath she took, and her cheeks were flushed.
I realized, belatedly, that she was angry with me.
Angry with me for treating her as the precious creature she was? How confusing she was.
I stood and stepped into her space, lifting my hands to cradle her face between them. “There are no games, Nina. I will never touch you if you don’t wish me to. You’re safe with me.”
If ever there came a day when I couldn’t keep my promise to her, I would rather end myself. She was too important, though I didn’t know why.
I didn’t need to know why.
All I needed was her.
20
Grayson
I left her moments later, unable to remain there another moment without breaking the promise I’d just made to her. She was too tempting, too difficult to be around, and I needed to ensure that she was safe.
Safe from me.
Without hesitation, I went to Alex’s suite. He was the only person with whom I could imagine talking about this, even if I couldn’t go into the depth of my feelings with him.
There were things I’d have to hold back, even from Alex, but he could help a little.
I knocked on his door, and he opened it immediately.
“Gray. To what do I owe the pleasure?” he asked as he stepped aside, letting me into his room.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” I said.
“With what, pray tell?” He arched an eyebrow, clearly amused by something.
I frowned. “What’s gotten into you?”
“Nothing. Nothing at all.” He took a seat on his lounge, crossing one leg over the other. “Do go on with whatever it is that’s driving you mad.”
Something was up with him, but I didn’t know what.
It didn’t matter. Every muscle in my body was screaming at me to go back to Nina and claim what was mine.
“Nina—my thrall—is—she’s—I care about her,” I said at last.
Alex looked pleased. “Yes, I thought so.”
“You thought so?”
“It’s absolutely perfect. You and the thrall—there’s something there. I’ve seen it.” He clapped his hands together. “What are you waiting for, man? Go for it.”
“No, I-I can’t.” My frown deepened, and I started pacing the room. “One minute it seems as if she’s warming up to me, and the next, she seems to be afraid of me. Her heart beats so erratically when I’m near. I can’t tell what’s going on with her, and it drives me mad. I can’t touch her.”
“Why ever not?”
“I promised her I wouldn’t, not until she wants me to.”
“Oh, my,” he said softly.
“What?”
“No, that’s just... That’s impressive.”
I let out a heavy breath. “Why?”
“You’re being so careful with her.”
He clearly wasn’t saying something, and while that was expected in our world, it was helping the tension build rapidly inside me. My need
to go to her mixed with my need to shake him like the fool he was so he’d spit it out.
And what did he mean, that it was impressive I was being careful with her?
It was what anyone would do in this situation.
I didn’t care for her more than anyone else would, if they were presented with someone like her.
I pushed the thoughts aside. I didn’t want to think too deeply about it.
“Well, there’s only one solution, then,” Alex said as he stood, breaking through my thoughts.
“Hm?”
“You have to sate your need elsewhere, if you won’t do something about your feelings for the girl.”
I lunged at him and slammed him against the wall, pinning him there with a forearm at his throat.
He held up both hands, laughing as if the whole matter was the most humorous thing in the world, which only served to confuse me.
Just enough to make me relax my hold.
“Calm down. I was only making a point. You like her a great deal.”
I sobered, stepped back from him and turned away.
He let out a sigh. “Gray...this is a problem.”
“I know.”
“It’s not normal.”
“I know.”
For a moment, he was quiet, leaving me alone with my thoughts about to how wrong this whole thing was, and yet how right it felt when I was with her.
“You can’t tell anyone else, Gray. No one will understand.”
I shook head. “You think I don’t know that?”
“I won’t say I understand entirely, but the girl is something special. I can see why you’re interested in her. But anyone else... You don’t have feelings for thralls, Gray. You know that.”
I sighed. “I do. I know.”
But I didn’t know what to do with myself.
21
Grayson
Tension rippled through me as I sat with the Council yet again.