“Let’s try putting her in the bassinet while you’re still here,” Elaine said.
“I should probably leave the jacket with you,” Russ said as he gradually rose to his feet.
“Of course not,” Elaine said. “You’d freeze to death out there.”
“Maybe you should open Steve and Claire’s present before we put her down,” Jo said. “I have a hunch it might help.”
“Okay.” Elaine carefully took off the ribbon and untied the rattle. “Claire sure knows how to do things right.”
“Steve does up the packages,” Russ said.
“Really?” Elaine unwrapped the package carefully. “A man who knows how to wrap a present. Now I’m really impressed.”
Jo glanced at Russ. “How about you? Did you learn how?”
“Nope. I’m all thumbs.”
Jo doubted it Her experience with Russ had demonstrated great manual dexterity. How she longed to experience it again.
“Oh, this is beautiful!” Elaine held up the soft baby blanket crocheted in several shades of pink, from cotton-candy pale to lollipop bright. She held it to her cheek. “This might substitute for your jacket liner, after all. Claire made this, didn’t she?”
Russ nodded. “She’s keepin’ in practice. Oh, and I’m to tell you she’ll baby-sit whenever you need her to.”
“That sounds wonderful.” Elaine sighed. “I know she really wants a baby of her own. Have they thought about adopting a child?”
“They filled out the papers, but it takes time before anything can happen.”
“If anybody deserves a baby, it’s Steve and Claire,” Elaine said.
“That’s a fact.”
“Well, let’s wrap Amanda in this soft blanket and see if it doesn’t send her right back into dreamland.” As Elaine stood, an envelope dropped to the floor.
“Elaine?” Jo picked up the sealed envelope with Elaine’s name written on it. “This was in the package.”
“A Christmas card, too. How nice.” Elaine took the envelope and opened it. As she scanned the message inside the card, she began to grin. “Well, how about that?”
“How about what?” Russ asked.
Elaine closed the card and slipped it back into the envelope. Then she tucked it into the pocket of her jeans as if to make sure the message remained private. “Oh, nothing. Just a private little joke.” She glanced at Russ. “You know, this is turning out to be a pretty good Christmas, after all.”
RUSS WAS CURIOUS about what had been written in the card that was so secret he couldn’t know about it. He’d been given a card for Lucile, too, and there might have been a private message in the cooler meant for Ned and Sharon, for all he knew. He’d ask Steve about it tomorrow morning. If Steve and Claire had just wished everybody a merry Christmas in the note, then it wouldn’t be something to keep private, now, would it? Something was up, and Russ wanted to know what it was.
But Elaine wasn’t talking as she carefully eased Amanda away from him and wrapped the baby in her new blanket.
Amanda woke up and stared at him, but she didn’t start crying again. As Russ gazed into those china-blue eyes, the strangest thing happened.
He’d been thinking how nice it would be to finally have Elaine take her baby back, but now that the moment was here, he wanted to hold that little kid again, wanted to rock her, watch her fingers curl around his jacket and listen to her soft breathing. If he stayed single, he’d never look into his own baby’s eyes, because he’d never be a father. That hadn’t bothered him before, but it bothered him now.
“I’ll just be a minute,” Elaine said. “Look, she’s drifting off again. Looks like you did the trick, Russ.”
“Glad to help.”
Crooning softly to Amanda, Elaine carried her into the bedroom.
“You did well with the baby.” Jo got up from the couch. “Have you held a lot of them?”
“Not a lot. I’ve held some. But livin’ on a ranch, you’re around babies all the time—chicks, kittens, puppies, calves, foals, and once Claire took in some orphaned possums. Baby people aren’t any different from baby animals. They just want to feel safe.”
“Babies aren’t the only ones who want that.”
The look in her eyes was the same one she’d given him a few minutes ago, the one that twisted his heart and made him want to hold her and make her feel safe. For a little while there he’d thought how nice that would be, but then he’d reminded himself that he was the one guy a woman should never trust. “Too bad there ain’t such a thing,” he said.
The warmth slowly left her eyes. “What happened to make you so cynical, Russ?”
“I’m just bein’ realistic, is all.”
“Then why cuddle kittens and babies?” She sounded impatient. “Why not let them cry and find out early that the world is a big, bad place?”
“That’s probably what I should do. Trouble is, I can’t.”
“Of course you can’t.” She drew closer. “Because you’re a big softie who worries about kittens getting cold and horses needing treats and babies having tummyaches.”
He didn’t appreciate that assessment. “Don’t go gettin’ the wrong idea about me, Jo. I’m an ornery cuss. Just ask Steve if you don’t—”
“I don’t believe it.”
The look in her eyes begged him to hold her. “Don’t get stuck on me, Jo. You’d be better off stayin’ clean away from me, as a matter of fact.”
Her green eyes became stormy. “Believe me, I’ve tried.”
“Then try harder.” He took hold of her left hand and held it up in front of her face. “For better or worse, you’re married. I’m not the answer to that problem.”
“You’re part of the problem.”
“Now wait a minute. All I did was—”
“You cuddled me when I needed it, just like those kittens, just like that baby, and it was wonderful. Then you walked away. You wouldn’t have done that to an animal in need. Why did you do it to me?”
He grabbed her by the arms. “Doggone it, woman, I—”
“Amanda’s asleep,” Elaine said as she walked into the living room. “I can’t tell you how much I—whoops. I can go back in there.”
Russ released Jo and backed away. “It’s okay. We were just—talking.”
“Right,” Jo said. “We were just figuring where we’d go next.” She turned to Russ. “Weren’t we?”
Russ adjusted the brim of his Stetson. “Yep.”
Elaine didn’t look convinced. “My mistake. Well, I’d better let you two get on with your rounds. I’ve kept you here long enough.”
Russ couldn’t get to the door quick enough. This evening was getting out of hand.
“Merry Christmas,” Jo called to Elaine as they headed out.
“Yeah, Merry Christmas,” Russ added over his shoulder without breaking stride.
“The same to both of you. It’s been a real treat.” Elaine closed the door after them.
“My God, you’re positively running!” Jo sounded out of breath and far behind him.
“We’ve got a lot to do.”
“Bull. You’re afraid of me.”
“Nope. Just in a hurry.” Russ walked up to Blackie and fed the horse a few more carrot chunks. By then Jo had reached the sleigh, and Russ was too much of a gentleman to watch her climb in by herself. He helped her in, although he made his mind a perfect blank when he touched her.
Jo settled herself in the seat. “I say you are afraid of me. I say you were afraid of me back in November.”
“You’re just makin’ me nervous because you’re married, that’s all.” He climbed in and pulled on his gloves.
“What if I wasn’t?”
Russ had always hated hypothetical questions. “You are, and that’s that To be honest, I think it’d be a real good idea if I took you home.” He picked up the reins and slapped them against Blackie’s rump.
“I’ve got the list, and I know who’s next on it”
Cursing, he remembere
d he’d never taken it back after he handed it to her. “Then I guess you’d best give it to me.”
“Nope.”
“Come on, Jo. Where is it?”
“You’ll have to search me to get it, and I hid it real well.”
Wouldn’t he love to do that. He’d make a real thorough search and enjoy every second. “Look, sweetheart, I think you’ve about made up your mind to break your weddin’ vows, and the way things are going, I’m liable to weaken and help you do it. I don’t want to live with that, so just give me the list and I’ll take you home.”
“So you’ve never taken a married woman to bed?”
“Not that I know of. I suppose a woman could have lied to me once or twice, but I never did it on purpose.”
“But now you’re afraid you might with me. Why would that be?”
Russ ground his teeth in frustration. “Doggone if I know. You’re put together real nice, but then so are lots of women. I get a kick out of talkin’ to you, but I’ve talked to others just as easy. There’s no blessed reason why you’ve been sticking in my mind like a burr since November. No reason why I can’t—”
“Since November?”
Well, damn. Now he’d gone and done it.
She latched on to his arm. “I’ve been stuck in your mind like a burr since November?”
He stared straight ahead, concentrating on driving the sleigh. Damn, he never should have said that. He didn’t know what was wrong with him. “Off and on.”
“Off and on. I don’t know what that means.”
“We’d best drop this subject, Jo. Who’s next on the list? I’ll take you home after we make the next delivery.” He figured she’d have to take out the list after that, and he’d get it back from her then.
“Hector Barnes is next. We’re supposed to just leave the package by the front door.”
“Hector Barnes.” Russ shook his head. “I didn’t know he was still around. He lives near the elementary school Steve and I went to. He used to run us off his property if we stepped one toe on it. I’ll bet he’s still doin’ it, too. I wonder why Steve’s givin’ him somethin’.” He headed down the street that would take him toward the school.
“Maybe it’s a big lump of coal.”
“No, Steve and Claire don’t do that. The presents are always somethin’ nice.”
“Well, enough about Hector Barnes. I want to know what you meant when you said I’ve been stuck like a burr in your mind off and on for the past month.”
He sighed. She wasn’t going to let the subject drop, so he might as well try to give her an answer. “Naturally I thought about you once in a while. We had us quite a time that night.”
“You said like a burr. A burr is something folks usually aren’t happy about.”
“Once I heard you were married, I wasn’t happy thinkin’ about somebody who was off limits. I tried not to.”
“But you did, anyway.”
“Some.” Every night, and sometimes when the action was slow during the day, too. He’d acted like a damn fool.
“I was so sure you put me right out of your mind the minute you left town. I figured by sundown the next day you were wrapped around some other cowgirl.”
The unfairness of that finally stirred his anger.
“You must be measurin’ me by your yardstick, honey. I’m not the one who ran off to Vegas and got myself married.”
Her voice grew quiet. “I thought for sure you’d go find somebody else in no time.”
He didn’t say anything. Lord knows he’d already said too much.
“You left because the night meant too much, didn’t you? You left because of what you were starting to feel about me, didn’t you?”
“Makes no difference.”
“It does if I’m not married.”
He’d about had it with that reasoning. “It doesn’t work that way, Jo. You don’t just decide. You stood in front of a preacher, or whoever does the ceremony in Vegas, and now it’s a legal thing. You have to undo it legally, too.”
“I didn’t stand up in front of a preacher. I’m not married. I made it up.”
He just about fell off the seat. Then he hauled back on the reins. “Whoa, Blackie! Whoa, boy!” When the sleigh crunched to a stop, he turned to Jo. “What did you say?”
She looked nervous, but she met his gaze. “I made it up. I’m not really married.”
“You’re not?” He didn’t believe her for a minute.
Sexual frustration could make people tell all sorts of stories.
“No.” She looked so adorable with her Santa hat perched on her head. “So you don’t have to feel guilty about wanting me. You’re not breaking any of your rules.”
“Now, isn’t that convenient.”
“You don’t believe me.”
“No, sweetheart, I don’t. I’d like to, and that’s a fact. But you’re only trying to ease my conscience and make the evening more interesting for both of us. I appreciate that, but I can’t oblige you.” He clucked to Blackie and the sleigh moved down the road again.
“But I’m not really married! I’ll prove it to you.” She took off her gold band and threw it into a snowbank.
Russ pulled back on the reins again and stopped the sleigh. “You’d best go get that. The snow’s packed pretty hard, and it might not have sunk down too far.”
“I don’t care about it. It only reminds me of Tommy, anyway. Good riddance.”
He turned to her. “Who the hell is Tommy?”
“My ex-husband.”
“Another husband?” Russ was beginning to wonder if this woman had husbands stashed everywhere.
“No, the only one I ever had. He left a year ago, on the Friday night after Thanksgiving. That was what I was trying to forget the night I...took you home with me.”
Russ became more confused by the minute. “So the ring that Richard gave you reminds you of Tommy?”
“Richard didn’t give me a ring.”
“He made you use the same ring you had from your first marriage? Now if that isn’t the cheapest, meanest, sorriest—”
“Richard didn’t give me a ring because Richard doesn’t exist! I made him up and put Tommy’s ring back on!”
He stared at her. “Honey, you are one terrific woman in bed, and you’re fun to be with, but I’m beginning to think you need a head doctor.”
She stared right back at him. “You could be absolutely right. Only a crazy person would get herself into a fix like this. So you don’t believe that I made up this husband of mine?”
“No, I reckon I don’t. I think you’re just tired of being married to somebody who doesn’t give you any satisfaction, and it’s Christmas, so you’re feeling extra lonely, and I’m handy.”
Jo sighed. “It sure is Christmas, and it’s absolutely true that Richard’s given me no satisfaction whatsoever, and we still have presents to deliver. I guess we’d better get on with it.”
“Are you gonna go fetch that ring?”
“No, I’m not. But trust me, it won’t be a problem.”
“I’m not surprised, to tell the truth. If he’s not man enough to do right by you, he won’t be man enough to make you dig through that snowbank to get his ring.”
“If it was your ring, you’d make me dig for it?”
“For as long as it took, honey. But then, if it was my ring, you wouldn’t be throwing it in the first place.”
10
JO HAD REALLY outsmarted herself, coming up with this marriage story. She’d imagined she could reveal her true status whenever she wanted and change everything. She’d thought Russ might be upset that she’d tricked him, but she hadn’t imagined that he just plain wouldn’t believe her new story.
But he didn’t. He figured she was simply so frustrated by her jerk of a husband that she was trying to fool Russ into going to bed with her. His reaction had given her time to reconsider whether it was wise to try to convince him, even assuming she could succeed. And in the meantime, they had a job to do.
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Russ drove past the empty schoolyard and up to a house with absolutely no Christmas decorations. Only the flashing of a television screen visible through the front window gave any color to the house, and no lights burned at all. The sidewalk had been shoveled, but otherwise the place looked almost deserted.
“I take it Hector Barnes doesn’t honor the season,” Jo said.
“Never did. Used to call up the school and complain because he could hear kids singing Christmas carols on the playground.”
“Maybe it’s a religious thing.”
“No, the principal asked, according to what I heard. Hector said he didn’t belong to any particular religion, but he had no use for Christmas and even less use for kids.”
“And he lives right close to a school. How strange.”
“Steve said we’re supposed to leave this by the front door?”
“That’s what it said on the list.” She knew better than to get the piece of paper. Once he got his hands on it again, he might decide to take her home. She wasn’t ready for that to happen yet, and if she had to use the list against him, she would.
Russ climbed down. “Maybe you’d better stay in the sleigh. No tellin’ how Hector’s gonna act if he hears somebody on his front porch.”
“Nonsense. This is the very time I should come with you. He won’t be nearly as suspicious if both of us go to the door.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“I’m coming with you, Russ.”
“Okay, if you have to.” He hoisted her down and released her immediately. Then he went to the back of the sleigh and took out a bulky package.
“What do you think it is?”
“Something soft and squishy.”
“I’m dying to know what it is.”
“We’re not stayin’ to find out. Keep behind me, okay?”
Jo grew a little less sure of herself. “Could this be one of those times we get shot at?”
“I don’t think so. He always yelled at us about havin’ a shotgun, but nobody ever saw one. I think he was mostly blowin’ smoke.”
“Why did he yell at you? Did you do stuff to him?”
“Why, sure we did. Somebody acting like an old grouch just riles kids up all the more. We threw eggs and tee-peed his front yard more times than I can count. Steve was the worst. Funny how walking up to his house still scares the devil out of me.”
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