by CM Wondrak
Oh, yes. It didn’t take me too long to relieve myself of that particular dream-induced erection.
You would be surprised how long it took to plan things out. Getting a new life… it wouldn’t be easy, but nothing in life ever worth having was easy to attain. Tenley and I would have a happy ending together, that much I knew, but where we would end up, that much was still undecided. There were so many options laid before us, so many possibilities. Together, we would take life by the balls and ride the bull until it ran no more.
I took a shower and dressed in all black. Sunday was my day off, although if there was an emergency on the property I lived in, I was liable to get a call to come fix whatever it was. The sheer amount of people who didn’t understand the fact that shoving paper towels down a toilet was a surefire way to clog that bitch was shocking. People were ridiculously stupid, and it showed more and more with each passing day.
Honestly, I couldn’t wait to get away with her. To take Tenley and make a new life. The things we would do together would be spectacular.
I figured it would be less creepy to tail Aubree and her family to the service than it would Kayla and Tenley. Kayla was so paranoid, she might just see me. When it came to her, I had to be careful. Once I decided to make a move on her, I had to be certain it would end things once and for all, because out of everybody, she was the one who would chase after us.
I remembered what she’d shouted at me in the courtroom, what she’d said. She knew I was the one who killed Bruce and Elaine, that her brother would never go off the rails and kill his wife and then himself, but that was one thing I’d done right. There was no evidence linking me to that crime. No witnesses, obviously. No DNA evidence. No fingerprints. Nothing at all.
That day, when I’d taken their lives—as I had to, because neither of them understood my connection to Tenley—I’d planned it all out beforehand. Every minute detail. I left nothing to chance. With Tenley safely asleep in my car, I took care of her parents with Bruce’s own gun, much like how I took care of Kyle.
You’d be surprised at how many homes had a gun hidden somewhere. People viewed it as a failsafe; if someone broke into your house, you had something to protect yourself with. Granted, you would have to be home during the robbery, but most people didn’t know most robberies happened during the day, when you were away at work and the kids were at school.
I was getting off track, but, anyway, Bruce had told me about getting the gun years before I ever decided on using it. When he got married, he said he needed to protect his wife, and I nodded along to him, tucking the information away for later. Of course, during that time, I’d thought Elaine was my fate.
Fucking Elaine. She was nothing. Whatever instinct I felt over her shifted the moment she gave birth to Tenley. It had always been Tenley. That girl was the only one for me, mark my words. If something ever happened to her, I would make the world burn in revenge.
Some people could not live with such an obsession. Some people would not be patient enough to wait ten years while in prison, but I was. I could live with such an obsession and flourish with it, to the point where my girl was all I could think about.
I could’ve done more, could’ve ran with her and started a life with her then, but I knew things would be hard. I knew she was only a child. As much as I wanted her, I had to wait. There were still some lines I would not cross and treating a child like an adult was one of them. So I waited for the police to come, for the police to find Tenley in my basement. I waited all those years, patient.
And my patience had finally paid off. Tenley was mine. She remembered me, and that was all I could ever ask for. That, and her love, which I knew I had the moment she saw my face. She might not have remembered me in the beginning, but she did now, and she was desperate to be at my side.
Kyle’s wake was being held in the local funeral home, and after following Aubree’s family there, I circled around the block once before pulling into the parking lot and waiting.
So many faces, all sad, each person walking into the building wearing black. The older women wore veils, like this was some kind of old-fashioned funeral. His parents did have money, and when I’d looked them up, they were members of a country club the next city over. If I had to guess, the snobby-looking older women and gentlemen were their friends from that club, and the teenagers who showed up—some with their families and some by themselves—were from the high school.
My seat was leaned back, and I ducked down when I saw Kayla’s car roll up. She got out, wearing an all black pantsuit. Tenley was slower to leave the car, and once she stood, she adjusted the dress on her body. No coat, but the dress had tight sleeves that clung to her form, and the fabric dipped low enough to let me appreciate her appearance, even from so far away. She wore black tights under it, along with heels.
The sun shined onto her blonde hair, its long lengths curled into gentle waves. It looked like she put on some makeup, too.
Tenley hardly looked like Tenley, and I didn’t know what to think. A part of me wanted to lunge out of this car and grab her, stop her from going into the building with her aunt. No one should have the pleasure of staring at her while in that dress but me.
But that was an impulsive thought, one I had to silence as I sat there and watched them go in.
Once they were inside, I checked the time. I didn’t know whether the service would be held here or what, so I couldn’t wait in the parking lot. Next door to the funeral home was some orthopedic building with offices and such, so eventually I wound up there, far enough away so the people who’d gone to weep over Kyle’s loss wouldn’t emerge from the funeral home and see me still sitting in my car, but close enough to follow the procession, whether that would be to a church or to a cemetery.
Sitting in my car, I played the waiting game. My phone sat beside me, and I opened it up, finding her name. Tenley. I didn’t have many names stored in it; I’d kept my circle very small after getting out of prison and finding where she and her aunt had run off to. But, frankly, that was just fine by me. I didn’t need friends. The only person I needed was Tenley, and it felt almost like I could see the finish line.
It was farther than I knew, but still, it was in sight.
The wake lasted a few hours, and then, when I knew the service was supposed to be held, I didn’t see anyone leaving and heading for a church, so I figured the parents had paid to have the funeral home do it. No church wanted a sinner, indeed.
A pity, because it was us sinners who kept the world turning. Us sinners who made life interesting. We were not afraid to make mistakes or do whatever it was we had to to reach our goals. Greed, envy, lust—every powerful man or woman in this world was a sinner in their own way, and those who weren’t? They were nothing but boring fucks.
Tenley was no sinner, but she was the only exception to the rule. She was a good girl, but when she was with me? When she was with me, she was a bad girl. I would take her hand and lead her into the darkness, and she would willingly come, if only to remain at my side.
I shifted my weight, bored out of my fucking mind as I sat there and waited. I could be researching, could be making more calls, but I felt if I tore my attention away from the funeral home next door, I’d miss the procession and be unable to follow them to the cemetery. There weren’t many cemeteries nearby, but you never knew where a family would find an available plot.
After the longest few hours of my life, people started leaving the funeral home. One of the workers was handing out flags for everyone to attach to their cars. The parking lot wrapped around the funeral home, and if I had to guess, other workers were loading the hearse in the back. I saw a man who looked like some kind of reverend or something exit the building, speaking with Mr. and Mrs. Sturgis.
Oh, the fucking waterworks. Even from my spot far away, I knew at least half of those people were in tears. His parents, a lot of the kids who knew Kyle from school, and especially that Aubree girl.
Ugh, she was fucking annoying, definitely. I’d
have to take care of her first, I think, get her out of the picture. Tenley would probably thank me.
It took another half hour, but eventually everyone had their flags attached to their cars and the hearse was rolling around the building, ready to go. I started up my car as they began to pull out of the parking lot, making a right turn and heading in the opposite direction of me. It took forever for each of the vehicles to enter the funeral procession, and by the time it ended, everyone who had to wait on the road was annoyed.
They were even more annoyed when I cut them off and followed.
Twenty minutes later, I pulled into the Eastgrove cemetery, a place full of rolling, gentle hills and rows and rows of headstones ranging from a few hundred years ago to today. I did not take the path in the cemetery that the others did, opting to drive around for a while, park my car and get out, acting like I was here visiting some dead relative or something.
My relatives weren’t dead. They were all alive, as far as I knew, but they’d all disowned me when I was on trial, shaking their heads at me when I was sentenced. I had always been a good boy in their eyes, someone who’d grown up into a good man—or what should’ve been a good man. They’d thought I was the devil or something like that, to be able to kidnap a child whose parents were dead.
To which I could only say: fuck off. I didn’t need my parents. I didn’t need my brother or my sister. I didn’t need any of them, really. Again, the only person I needed in my life was Tenley, and she was currently surrounded by a sea of faces, weeping over a casket that was my own making.
I stopped before a headstone that was old, so old it was made of limestone and completely unreadable after years and years of rain. Whoever was under there, a passerby couldn’t tell. And, judging from the look of the overgrown weeds near the stone, no one came to visit, anyway.
That was what happened when you died. You slowly drifted off into obscurity, and eventually no one would remember your name. That’s just how it was, how it always would be. Even now, with everyone connected to the internet and each other at all times of the day and night, even with all the pictures and the partying and the memories, you’d be forgotten, just like your great-great grandfather was.
Hands in my pockets, I bent down and stared at the grimy stone. It was a pity, of course, to live your life and then be forgotten by the sands of time. No one wanted to be forgotten. Everyone wanted some kind of legacy that would remain years after their death; it’s why so many people had children.
Children. Ugh. Do not get me started on those things. I did not know whether I’d ever want them. Right now, all I wanted was Tenley.
Getting up, I straightened out my back as I roamed the cemetery. My phone was the only weight in my pocket. After crossing a few hills and countless rows of newer headstones, I came upon the last bit of the funeral. A crowd had gathered, the casket already in place, though it hadn’t been lowered yet. The same reverend stood at the head of it, holding onto a book which must be some kind of bible.
Though the crowd was over two hundred feet away, my eyes zeroed in on Tenley and her aunt. They stood near Aubree and her family. Kyle’s family members had flowers, which I’d bet they would set on the casket before it was lowered down.
I stopped beneath a tree, leaning on it. No one paid me any attention; the rest of the cemetery was pretty empty. As it turned out, not many people wanted to visit you after you were dead. Funerals, the fancy granite or marble headstones—it was all for show, all to make the people who were still breathing feel better, should they ever get sad and wish to stroll down memory lane.
The reverend looked as though he was reading a passage from the book he held onto, his head bent in reverence. Everyone who’d come stood in a circle around the casket and the hole that would become Kyle’s forever. There was no tent, for there was no need. The weather was quite nice today, not overly warm but warm enough to keep the chill away from those who’d forgone jackets with their attire.
I couldn’t hear what was read or spoken over the casket, but I imagined it was something emotional, something about how Kyle was surely in a better place now. I wasn’t sure if I believed in God, in an afterlife of any sort. Heaven, hell—the dichotomy between good and evil, in my eyes, was never so cut and dry.
Some might think I was the worst of humanity with the things I’d done, the things I would do to keep Tenley safe and at my side, but I did what I did out of love. How could I ever be evil when the root of it was Tenley?
But I guess that’s the thing about monsters: they never believed in their own monstrous ways.
After the reverend spoke, the family stepped up to the casket. The mother’s shoulders were shaking to the point where even I could see them tremble in the distance. They placed flowers gently on top of the casket, and others who were close to Kyle did the same.
Aubree made no move to, for she didn’t have any flowers, nor did many of the other high school students who’d come. They simply watched, holding their hands limply at their sides. Tenley didn’t either, nor did Kayla.
I stared at the back of Tenley’s head, wishing she would sense I was here, that she would know I was near. I couldn’t call her, for even if she had her phone on her, it wasn’t like she could excuse herself from the funeral and walk away from it without raising questions from her aunt.
No, we had to play this cool. Once Kayla knew I was out, once she put it all together and knew I was around, I’d have to take care of her. She would never allow Tenley to be mine. If there was one person in the world who hated me above all else, it was Kayla Goddard. I couldn’t blame her, for I did do what she accused me of; her brother’s blood, along with his wife’s, was on my hands.
Tenley’s parents.
Tenley knew the truth now, and yet she still adored me. It was all I could’ve hoped for, all I dreamt about these last ten years. I could never imagine coming back to her and having her hate me for what I did.
Maybe it was fate, or maybe she could feel the weight of my stare on the back of her head, but Tenley’s head turned, and across the distance, I swore she scanned the area around the funeral. Perhaps she was bored of it all, or she was looking for me.
And she found me. It took her a few moments, but she zeroed in on me, on my position beneath a tree a few hundred feet away, and I felt my gut harden. I wanted nothing more than to rush over there, sweep her off her feet, and take her out of there, bring her home with me.
Tenley’s gaze didn’t remain on me for long, lest Kayla wonder why she was staring at something over her shoulder and not paying attention to the service before her. As she turned her head forward, breaking eye contact with me, I heaved a sigh, for I knew I would never get my fill of that girl. Never.
The service finished, and many of the people walked away, not wanting to stay and see the casket be lowered into the ground. Tenley and Kayla remained, along with Kyle’s family and a few others. I knew Tenley only stayed because her friend was staying. Aubree Laurence had a not-so-tiny crush on the boy in the casket, and I supposed I could sympathize with her a bit, for I was no stranger to unrequited love.
Love, obsession, whatever. It was the same thing, depending on how you looked at it.
Not anymore, though. Now that I was a free man, I was no longer alone. Not in my head, and not in real life. Tenley’s reaction to seeing me had been something out of a dream, frankly. It was everything I could’ve hoped for and then some.
I did notice Kayla start to back off, away from the reverend, who remained, along with the man who was lowering the casket. Tenley set a hand on her friend’s back before meeting her aunt in the back, a row or two behind everyone else. What was said between them I could not say, nor could I read their lips.
Tenley said something which caused Kayla to glance back to Aubree and her family, and I bet Kayla sighed. I saw her shoulders shrug once, and then, if I had money to bet, I’d say she told Tenley to call her should something change. The next thing I knew, I was watching Kayla walk to her car, pull
the flag off the front, and get in. She drove away without her niece.
Which meant Tenley was staying.
I felt a smirk creep along my mouth. Tenley had told Kayla she was staying with Aubree, but she wasn’t. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that Tenley had elected to remain here because of me, to stay longer, to hold back and get Kayla out of here so she could come to me.
What a good girl.
Time seemed to drag on, and I knew it was only due to the fact that Tenley was without Kayla, out in the open, ripe for the picking. I itched to have her close, to feel her skin against mine. The afternoon wore on, the early signs of dusk appearing in the sky, and everyone left.
Everyone but Tenley, that was.
Oh, it took her a while to persuade Aubree and her family to go without her. I wasn’t sure what she said, but it got them out of her hair. With everyone gone, with the cemetery workers arriving with machines to fill the ground with dirt, Tenley’s back was square, her spine straight, as she crossed the rolling field of headstones between us.
The closer she got, the more I was able to appreciate the outfit she wore. It must be a new dress, for it was not something I’d ever imagined her wearing. Less skin showed than what had when she’d worn her friend’s dress to that party, but it was still just as sexy. Even sexier, I think, because I knew she was all mine.
“I’m surprised you’re here,” she said once she reached me, giving me a smile before leaning into my chest. She tucked herself perfectly against the muscle there, and I was slow in wrapping my arms around her, keeping her firmly locked in place.
“Of course I came,” I whispered, causing her to tilt her head up and stare at me. “I’ll take any chance to see you. What did you say to your friend and her family to get them to leave you?”
She let out a short sigh before muttering, “I said Kayla would be around in a bit to pick me up. She had to run to work or something.”
“Did she?”