The Boyfriend Application

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The Boyfriend Application Page 2

by R. J. Groves


  “Did you want to negotiate my illustrations?”

  “No,” he said, winking. “I already know they’re good.”

  Chapter 3

  Lacey leaned against her car. Her bags were already in the boot, and she was ready to go. Except that she was waiting for Adam. She checked her watch and groaned with frustration. She knew this was a bad idea. Not only would she have to deal with Adam for the whole weekend, she’d have to interact with him every day for the next two months. How could she have let herself get so desperate that she’d agree to that? His condition was that she had to illustrate his book. If she’d taken him up on it when he came to her office instead of waiting until the end of the day, that’s all she would have to do.

  But she was convinced there would be someone—anyone—else who would have been remotely interesting enough to introduce to her family. But there wasn’t. No one who showed interest in her advertisement was as good looking as Adam, and no one else could hold a conversation. As much as Adam and his antics annoyed her, she had no doubt he could hold a conversation. And he was quick-thinking and witty enough to respond to any remarks that might be made. She breathed a sigh of relief as he pulled his car in next to hers and climbed out.

  “You’re late,” she said, not wasting any more time.

  “Good morning to you, too,” he said, flicking his eyes to his watch, and rounding to the back of the car to get his bag out. “And I’m right on time.”

  “You’re not here early, so you’re late.”

  She opened the boot of her car for him to transfer his bag into it and closed it, not hesitating to get into her car. Adam climbed into the passenger side.

  “If you wanted me here earlier, you should have said so,” he said, clicking his seatbelt on. “Besides, we’re going to see your family, not going to a high-class meeting.”

  “I am never late, Adam. It doesn’t matter what it’s for, I am never late.”

  She started driving, getting up to speed as quickly as she could. If they were going to get there on time, they were going to have to make good distance. Sure, he made a point—it’s not like they had to get there by a certain time. But she’d told her grandmother she would be there at a certain time and she had never gone back on her word. And she wasn’t about to, either. For the weekend to go well, her family had to approve of Adam. And they weren’t going to do that easily if they thought he was a negative influence on her.

  “We’ll just say we got stuck in traffic,” he said, reclining the seat a little and adjusting himself to a more comfortable position.

  “It’s a country road—no one ever gets stuck in traffic.”

  “Roadworks?”

  Lacey shook her head.

  “Well, then, just say that I got stuck in traffic on my way to your place.”

  “Did you?”

  He shrugged, folding his arms across his chest. “I could have.”

  “I’m not going to lie to my family, Adam.”

  “Then what am I?”

  She pressed her lips together in a tight line. As usual, he had a point. Lying about why they were going to be late was only the least of their concerns. She’d been lying about having a boyfriend for a year. And now, she’d simply set that lie in stone. Oh, God, what had she done? Something along the lines of dug her own grave came to mind.

  “Figured,” he said. “You know, I was convinced you were going to choose Bill from IT. You two would have been cute together.”

  She glanced over at him, her brow furrowed. He wore his mischievous grin with pride. “How do you know about him?”

  “I saw him on his way to your office,” he said. “I figured if that’s who your notice was attracting then I may as well give you another option.”

  “So, you did come to my office about the notice, then?”

  “Of course not,” he teased. “I had to drop in the reports, remember? But, you looked desperate.”

  “I did not look desperate.”

  He raised an eyebrow at her. “If you weren’t desperate, why did you need someone to come with you at all?”

  She shook her head, refusing to answer, keeping her eyes on the road. She was desperate, and she knew it. She just wouldn’t admit it out loud. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing he had one over her. Caught in her thoughts, she near on jumped when music started blaring around them. She saw his hand move away from the radio button.

  “What are you doing?” She sounded more frantic than she’d intended.

  “I think it’s pretty obvious, don’t you?” he said, sarcasm dripping in his tone. “It was too quiet.”

  “Well, I like quiet.” She reached over and turned the radio off. “It helps me think.”

  “About what?”

  He sounded bored, but she was getting frustrated with him. She didn’t know what it was about Adam, but he just seemed to push all the wrong buttons.

  “About how the hell I’m going to convince my family I’m dating a guy who I can’t stand to be around.”

  “That’s a bit harsh.”

  She glanced over at him. She’d figured he was joking—because that’s what he was: a joker—but the look on his face said otherwise. He almost looked … serious … genuinely hurt.

  “We’re total opposites, Adam,” she said, trying to soften the blow a little.

  “There is a saying that opposites attract,” he said solemnly, staring out the window.

  “Not like this,” she mumbled.

  “But you still asked me to come with you.”

  She didn’t say anything. She didn’t know what to say—nor did she particularly want to say anything. This was an arrangement. They had an agreement. That was all. Nothing could ever come from this weekend. They’d get through it, go home, and in a week or so, she’d tell her family they broke up. Maybe if they saw through their façade, it wouldn’t come as a surprise.

  “You know, Lacey, you’ll have to at least pretend to like me in front of your family,” he said. “And you’re going to have to fill me in on what they know about us so we’re on the same page.”

  She shook her head, resigned to the fact she would have to talk to him—at least for long enough to fill him in, which, fortunately for her, wasn’t much.

  “They don’t know much about you, just that you travel a lot with your work and we’re taking things slow.”

  “My name?”

  “I never gave them a name.”

  “They never asked?”

  She felt her cheeks flush. “I just referred to you as Mr Snuggles.”

  There was silence for a moment and she glanced over at Adam. His eyes were wide, and his lips were a thin line.

  “Is something wrong?”

  “Mr Snuggles?” Oh, God. As if she couldn’t be more embarrassed. “Where’s the manliness in that?”

  “There is nothing un-manly about snuggling,” she stated, refusing to look at him.

  “Maybe so, but there is a lot of un-manly about Mr Snuggles.”

  She wasn’t sure his tone could be more serious. It was obviously a topic that he was passionate about. But this—it was almost amusing. She fought the smile that battled with her lips.

  “A manly man doesn’t announce that he likes to snuggle, even if he does,” he said, pressing his head back against the seat. “I like to keep my manliness.”

  “Well, I didn’t exactly have you in mind when I made up a fake boyfriend.”

  “I guess.”

  He looked back out the window, his arms crossed, as if he were sulking about the whole thing. Who would have thought he could be so sensitive about his manliness? It was almost … endearing. Almost.

  ΅ ΅ ΅

  By the time they got to her parents’ place, Lacey had just about had enough of being stuck in a car with Adam. After his little huff about his manliness, he switched from topic to topic—how the local football team was going, interesting facts he’d come across in the stories that he covered, what happened in the most recent episode
of that show he was watching, his neighbour’s activities that sounded like he was watching a soap opera rather than just overhearing their disputes. Hadn’t she mentioned that she liked quiet?

  As usual, Patricia was waiting on her seat on the patio and started calling out as soon as Lacey stopped the car in the driveway.

  “They’re here! Charles! Jane!”

  She rose from her seat and rushed down the patio steps towards them. Adam leaned towards Lacey.

  “Gran? Grandma? Nan?”

  “Oh, no,” Lacey said, her eyes sending a warning. “Patricia. She’ll kill you if you call her anything else.”

  He nodded and opened his door, climbing out of the car and moving around the vehicle to be closer to her family. She let out a deep breath, praying to God that this would work, but not keeping her hopes up. Her family wasn’t full of idiots—they could see through a brick wall. She just hoped that they could be a thick enough brick wall to get through the weekend. Following Adam, she climbed out of her car and moved to his side for the introductions. Patricia had already spread her arms and taken Adam in an embrace and pulled him back to arm’s length to study him. Lacey’s parents weren’t far behind and came to a stop next to them.

  “This is Patricia,” Lacey said, indicating towards her grandmother, then towards her parents. “My dad, Charles, and my mum, Jane.”

  He took Charles’s hand in a firm handshake. “Adam Woods,” he said. “It’s a pleasure to meet you both. Lacey’s told me so much about you all.” He flashed his convincing grin and Lacey held her breath hoping that they wouldn’t notice his lie.

  “All good things, I hope,” Charles said.

  “Of course,” he said, not hesitating. “That’s how I know she’s got a wonderful family.”

  A proud smile flashed across her dad’s face and she was sure that she saw a blush deepen in her mum’s cheeks. Patricia, on the other hand, didn’t look quite as convinced, raising her eyebrow at his comment, and shooting a questioning look towards her. Lacey smiled, though she was sure she was about as convincing as Adam’s flattery.

  “I bet you’re both aching for a coffee,” Charles said, slapping Adam on the back. “Your mother has been cooking up a storm.”

  “Well, it’s all been for the party,” Jane corrected. “But I’m sure I could spare a few biscuits.”

  “It’s settled then,” Patricia piped in, her eyes flashing between Adam and Lacey. “Bring your bags in later. For now, we’ve got a lot to learn about the man who stole our Lacey’s heart.”

  Before she knew it, Adam was being ushered off by her grandmother and her parents, answering questions, Lacey being forgotten. He was polite and complimented them on their home and her mother’s biscuits. He made sure Patricia was comfortable before taking a seat himself. He was perfect. And he acted exactly how she’d hoped that any guy she brought home would act. He’d only just met her family, but already he looked like he cared about them, and seeing the way that he acted around them made a warmth spread inside of her. A feeling that she couldn’t recognise or pinpoint. Not to mention that he got along with her dad—no guy outside of the family got along with her dad except for David, who’s now her brother-in-law. The fact that Adam was getting along with her dad … well … it scared her. Her dad was always a good judge of character, but she knew that he was wrong about Adam.

  Because they weren’t real. They weren’t together. And finding out that they broke up after the weekend would shake Charles.

  And she was starting to realise how bad an idea it was to bring him home with her.

  Talk about being a disappointment.

  Chapter 4

  If she’d thought Adam was going to get out of being interrogated simply because her parents and Patricia had kept conversation light and superficial all afternoon, then she was wrong. Her father sat at one end of the table, Patricia at the other. Lacey sat between her mother and Adam. Her brother, Marcus, sat between Adam and Patricia. Emily and David and their boys Aidan and Jack sat opposite them. Lacey sat, her hands in her lap, having lost her appetite half-way through the meal, her eyes shooting between Adam and whichever member of her family was interrogating him at any given time. She’d held her breath waiting for more than a few of his answers, knowing that her family would see right through them, but he’d hit the nail on the head each time.

  “Lacey told us you had to travel a lot for work,” her mother said sceptically. “Do you really think distance is good for a relationship?”

  Lacey felt her body tense. When they got here, she was already convinced it was a bad idea to bring him and pretend he was her boyfriend. Now, there was no chance of being able to convince her otherwise—it was more than just a bad idea. It was a setup for failure and it would only be a matter of time before their lack of preparation showed.

  “Oh, it’s definitely not,” he said. Her eyes shot towards him. How was he so quick to respond to all the questions? “But I’m rarely gone for more than one night and technology makes it easy to keep in touch.” She breathed a sigh of relief, realising now why he always had an answer—he was telling the truth. Well, an adapted version of the truth to make it sound as though there was room for Lacey in his life. “And we trust each other,” he added. “So, that’s never really been an issue.”

  “What, exactly, do you do, Adam?” Emily said, squinting her eyes.

  “I’m a reporter at the same magazine Lacey works for.”

  “Is that where you met?” Marcus asked.

  “What can I say?” Adam said. “I had to take some reports to her to illustrate and, since then, I couldn’t get enough of her.”

  Lacey felt her eyes widen, mirroring the look on Emily’s face. Her sister was always more focussed on her own relationship with David to be too interested in Lacey’s love life. But she did know one thing in particular and that was bound to expose them.

  “Lacey doesn’t date co-workers,” Emily said. “It’s her rule.”

  She glanced at Adam—his jaw was tight and, for the first time all day, he seemed to be at a loss for what to say. Admittedly, Emily’s scrutinising glare could do that to a person.

  “I … made an exception,” she said.

  Emily’s glare shifted from Adam to her. “You never make an exception.”

  After a moment of silence, Adam cleared his throat. “I’ll admit, she didn’t make it easy for me. But I’m not one to give up on something I set my mind to.” He reached his arm behind her and pulled her closer towards him, planting a chaste kiss on her cheek. “Isn’t that right, honey?” he said.

  She forced a smile, even though his fingertips, pressed against her arm, sent electric pulses through her body, making her heart feel like it was about to pound out of her chest. His very touch sent all her hairs on end and she wasn’t sure whether or not she liked it—a combination of feelings that confused her. How was she supposed to gather her thoughts when he was being so distracting? She’d never even liked him—at least, she thought she didn’t. Sure, she’d always thought he was attractive, and she may have caught herself staring at him a few times when they first met. But since then, it was strictly professional. Emily was right—she had a rule.

  And in her desperation to not disappoint her family, she’d stuffed up by bringing someone from her work, who she sees every day, home with her. Not only had she set them up for failure in convincing her family they were together, but the line between professionalism and getting friendly was steadily blurring. She shouldn’t be feeling the blood rushing to the spot where he kissed her cheek. She shouldn’t still be able to feel his lips lingering even though they barely brushed against her skin. She shouldn’t feel the warmth spreading inside her body straight to her core. Because it was only for the weekend, and there was no way she’d let herself start to have actual feelings for this guy. She couldn’t. She’d be a fool if she did.

  The haze in front of her eyes started to disappear and she realised everyone at the table was looking at her. She cleared her throat,
shaking the thoughts from her mind, pushing the feelings that were starting to burn in her chest as deep down as she could.

  “I figured anyone that dedicated was worth taking a chance on,” she said, feeling the lie spread through her like a lake freezing over.

  Emily’s eyes squinted at Lacey and her mouth dropped open as if to say something, but Patricia was the one to speak.

  “I think that’s enough interrogating for now,” Patricia said. “We don’t want to scare Adam off too soon, do we? He’s obviously a good man, otherwise our Lacey wouldn’t have brought him home with her.” She shifted her attention to Adam. “Now, be a darl, and pass the potatoes.”

  Adam did as he was requested, and the conversation shifted to general chit-chat, but Emily’s look was still sceptical. And every second more that passed over dinner had the lake in Lacey’s chest freezing just a little more. Though, she couldn’t determine whether it was because of Emily’s influence, or her own doing.

  ΅ ΅ ΅

  “All right, spill,” Emily said, dropping the dirty plates into the dishwater, and picking up a tea towel.

  After dinner, Emily had been insistent that all the men should go have a look at the trainset model Charles and Marcus had been working on and that Jane and Patricia should settle down with a cup of tea while she and Lacey cleaned up. But Lacey knew what it was really about, and Emily wasted no time in bringing it up.

  “What’s there to tell?”

  “You and Adam,” Emily said. “I know you don’t date work colleagues.”

  “I told you—”

  “That you thought he was worth taking a chance on, I know.” Emily wobbled her head side to side sarcastically. “Do you really expect me to believe that? I’m not an idiot, Lacey. I can tell something’s going on. You look more awkward around him than anything. So, spill.”

  Lacey sighed, scrubbing a stubborn spot on a plate before rinsing it and handing it to Emily. “We’re not dating,” she mumbled. “We do work together, and everything else he said is true except the parts about us being together. But we’re not dating.”

 

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