by David Owen
The landing was dark, and he edged his way along to Kat’s bedroom door. The shock of the room’s destruction made him halt at the threshold. Books and DVDs littered the floor, shreds of posters clinging to the walls. The desk chair lay on its side, and an action figure crunched underfoot as he moved to right it. Her MacBook was open, screen aglow.
‘You’re here,’ Wesley said, certain that it was true.
The only thing in the room apparently undisturbed was a small pile of sand-coloured gravel on the desk. He scooped it up and let the familiar stones play through his fingers. Gravel from the track that led to TrumourPixel’s garage.
‘And you were there,’ he said, turning a slow circle to gaze around the room, hoping he might catch her in the peripheries of his vision. ‘You stole the car. You’re trying to stop them.’
If there was a response, he didn’t hear it.
‘I know it’s weird I’m here, I just . . .’
Missed you. He couldn’t bring himself to say it aloud.
The TV downstairs was loud enough to push through the ceiling, words too muffled to make out. Wesley forced a smile, hoped it didn’t make him look insane.
‘I needed somebody to talk to.’
He sat on the edge of the bed, leaving enough space that she could sit beside him, if she wanted.
*
Kat stayed by the door, as far from him as she could get. She had been frightened when she first found him there – her harasser, apparently able to enter her bedroom whenever he wanted – but with every word he spoke that fear was displaced by anger.
‘I’ve got involved with some people I shouldn’t have,’ Wesley said, looking at his hands.
‘You definitely shouldn’t have, because they’re Nazis,’ answered Kat, even though she knew he wouldn’t hear it.
‘But it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Stealing the car hasn’t stopped them, but we can do it together.’
Kat laughed bitterly. ‘Together?’
‘I’ve been trying to find out what happened to Aaron Musley, the boy who disappeared before you,’ said Wesley, speaking to the empty space beside him on the bed. ‘I think he was trying to save himself from the fade by finding some connection to the world – something to live for. Maybe if you save Tinker . . . it might be enough to stop whatever is happening to you.’
Kat moved slowly to stand in front of him, stepping carefully across the debris of her life. There was that tug again, the yearning to slip inside his body. Except she didn’t need that to know his true thoughts better than he did.
‘You might know already, but I think you can . . . go inside people while you’re fading. Temporarily.’ He spoke as if the idea both thrilled and appalled him. ‘Maybe if you can possess one of them or whatever when they attack Tinker, make them crash the car or let her get away. I don’t really know how it works.’
‘No, you really don’t,’ said Kat. Still, she wondered. Admitting he could be right meant admitting she needed him, and that made her sick. If it meant saving Tinker, she would have to swallow her pride.
Could it really save her? She looked around at the destruction of her room and knew she wanted to try.
‘I won’t do this for you,’ she said to Wesley. ‘I’ll do it for Tinker. I’ll do it so I can make it all up to Dad. I’ll do it for myself.’
‘Follow me to school tomorrow,’ said Wesley, oblivious. ‘I’ll confront Luke and Justin, convince them I want to help, and find out exactly what they’re planning. You’ll hear it all and they’ll never know. I’ll be like a double agent. This is the only way I can give you inside information.’
‘You’re not giving me anything!’ she shouted. ‘If you really cared you would call the police and put a stop to this right now. I do need you, but not as much as you need me. I’m the only way you can stay friendly with your MRA mates without having to do the dirty work. You’re not being brave. You’re a coward.’
The look of determination, of triumph on Wesley’s face as he scribbled his address on a scrap piece of paper made her want to reverse the fade just so she could smack him. How could he be so deluded and lost to convince himself he was doing the right thing? She lifted a hand towards him. One step, a moment of surrender to that seductive pull, and she could see for herself.
No. She stepped away at the same moment that Wesley got to his feet.
‘There’s somebody else we want to find to ask about Aaron. A girl,’ he said. ‘But we don’t know who she is. It must have been somebody he was close to – a friend or a girlfriend . . .’
Kat remembered what Safa had told her a couple of nights ago. She didn’t want to help him, but it was clear now that the fade was accelerating. If he could find out more about what happened to Aaron, it might help her cling to herself for a little longer. She crossed the room to her laptop and began to type.
The light from the MacBook screen changed as Wesley moved to the door. Before it had simply been on the desktop, but when he returned to the desk an Instagram profile was waiting for him. A familiar young woman represented by a grid of selfies and modelling shots. The name at the top almost made him choke.
The girl who had come looking for Aaron, who he must have visited before the end.
‘Selena Jensen.’
As soon as he was gone, Kat took out her phone and began writing a message to Safa.
You won’t believe what just . . .
She stopped typing, staring at the blinking cursor. They had only just left each other, and already Kat missed her. She couldn’t remember the last time she simply had to tell somebody something. She couldn’t remember the last time she had somebody to tell.
And she had already lost her.
*
Wesley messaged Aoife on the walk home.
It’s Selena. The girl who was looking for Aaron. He included the link to her Instagram profile.
Seriously?! came the reply. There’s no way she’ll agree to meet us.
She might if you mention Aaron’s name.
Okay, I’ll try! She signed off with a fingers-crossed emoji.
Wesley got home to find Dave playing with Evie in their room, shouts and giggles filling the flat, while Mum reclined on the short sofa with a damp cloth draped across her forehead. He felt like an actor walking onstage during the wrong scene.
‘Rough day?’ he asked, sitting across from her in the armchair.
Mum groaned as she levered herself upright. ‘I took Evie to see that new Disney movie. They’re so bright they always give me a headache. You could have come but I didn’t know where you were. Evie was going nuts being cooped up here.’
‘It’s all right.’ A thousand repeat viewings of Frozen had put him off Disney for ever. He looked around the bare walls of the front room, the tables with nothing on them but coasters and junk mail. ‘Why don’t we have any family photos out?’
Mum removed the flannel. ‘We never have.’
‘Yeah, but why?’
‘I guess I got out of the habit of putting them up because we were in friends’ houses,’ she said. ‘Plus most of the photos we’ve got have Jordan and your dad in them.’
‘It’s like you’re ashamed of the family we are now,’ Wesley said.
‘Of course not.’ She patted the seat beside her, and he crossed to sit, letting her put an arm around him. ‘I don’t have a good reason for the photos, Wesley. But I’m proud of this family. We’ve been through a lot, and we’re still here.’
He nodded, allowing himself to sink into her embrace. It made him feel like a child, and for once he was glad of it.
‘I know there’s been a lot going on, and I should have spoken to you about it sooner,’ said Mum. ‘Is there anything you want to talk about?’
The family was still there, after everything that had happened. They had clung on, but Wesley wanted to do more than that. He hated that the only way it could happen was to let somebody else take his place.
There was a lot more change to come. He had to show her tha
t he was strong.
‘I’m okay,’ he said, choking down everything else he wanted to say. ‘We should take some new family photos.’
‘Of course,’ said Mum. ‘What’s brought all this on, anyway?’
‘I just think it’s important that we keep memories,’ he said. So even if he did lose his place here, there would always be something to remember it by.
23
Existential Stakeout
At the corner before he reached school, Wesley almost collided with an older boy blocking the pavement. He wore torn jeans and an orange T-shirt, and dark circles under his eyes suggested he hadn’t slept.
‘Excuse me, have you seen Kat Waldgrave?’ he said, voice hoarse, as if he had been asking all night.
The question almost made Wesley laugh. ‘I really haven’t.’
The boy looked like he might cry. ‘I’m sure she’s here somewhere. I have to find her . . .’
Wesley thought immediately of Lukundo being drawn to Aaron’s house after he had been inhabited by his missing friend. ‘How do you know her?’ he asked.
The boy looked pained. ‘I don’t. At least, I don’t think I do.’
He must have been somebody Kat had inhabited. It did work. Wesley didn’t know what strange connection brought the host in search of their faded passenger, but if he was searching for her here she had to be close by. Kat must have heard his plan, and followed him to school to carry it out.
After a moment’s uncertainty, the boy followed Wesley to school, stopping finally to linger outside the gate.
In every lesson, Wesley couldn’t stop glancing beside him, wondering if Kat was there, judging the little work he managed to scrawl out.
No shared morning classes meant he went looking for Luke and Justin at lunchtime. On the way to the canteen he ran into Aoife.
‘Selena replied. You were right, as soon as I mentioned Aaron she agreed to meet us.’
‘When?’
‘Tonight. I haven’t told the others yet.’
Wesley nodded. ‘The sooner the better.’
He moved to walk past her, but Aoife stepped into his path to block him.
‘I’m glad you’ve made us do this,’ she said. ‘It’s made me rethink the whole thing. I think Robbie and Jae, too.’
‘I’m glad,’ he said, and kept moving before he had to think of a proper response. It embarrassed him to think Kat might have overheard.
The canteen was half-full when he arrived, and he spotted them at a table in the corner, wolfing down portions of lumpy chilli con carne. There were too many people here for them to turn violent, but their conversation would be masked by echoing voices and the smack of plastic trays on plastic tables.
‘Let’s do it,’ he said, hoping Kat was still with him.
He was already talking before he took the seat beside them. ‘I’ve been an idiot, okay, and I know I might have messed this up, but I’ve thought about it and I really want to—’
‘Whoa, mate,’ said Luke through a mouthful of chilli. ‘Calm down. We were going to come looking for you.’
There was nothing violent in his tone. Wesley felt himself relax a little.
Luke pushed his tray away. ‘We went too far the other night.’
A part of Wesley wished they hadn’t quite got out of the way of that speeding car. Not enough to kill them, just injuries severe enough to keep them both out of action for a month or two. Problem solved.
‘We believe it wasn’t you who stole the car. You wouldn’t even know how to drive it!’ said Luke. ‘And if you’d told anybody about it we’d probably know by now.’
Wesley kept quiet, trying to work out where this was going. He had expected to have to beg and plead to be let back into the gang. Instead they were being nicer to him than they ever had been before. Somebody was putting them up to this, and Justin’s not-so-subtle elbow nudge to Luke’s ribcage proved it.
‘Look, I’m sorry, all right?’ he said, clearly begrudging every word.
‘We’re sorry,’ echoed Justin.
Wesley nodded, hoping it was enough of a reaction to keep them happy.
‘It’s dumb, getting this worked up over a prank,’ said Luke. ‘It’s all just for a stupid video Tru wants to film.’
Wesley watched him closely. ‘It really is just a prank?’
‘Yeah, man. He’s just taking it seriously because he wants Niko Denton to see.’
The smile on his face was fixed. Luke could probably convince somebody he wasn’t a murderer while holding a severed human head.
‘If I’m going to be involved, I need to know exactly what he’s planning.’
Luke took a breath, as if he was fighting to keep calm. ‘It’s not as easy as that. Tru needs something from you to prove you’re for real. We need another car.’
Wesley’s stomach sank, knowing what would come next.
‘You have easy access to more,’ said Luke. ‘We need you to steal one for us.’
‘How am I supposed to steal from the dealership?’ said Wesley.
‘Get the keys off the new guy who’s banging your mum,’ said Luke, before remembering he was asking a favour. ‘Her new boyfriend. He must trust you by now.’
‘I just wash them.’
‘So you know where the keys are kept, yeah?’
The lock box in the back office. ‘I can’t get to them.’
‘You’re saying there’s no way?’
‘I’d have to get his keys and—’
‘All right, so that’s what you do.’
‘I don’t know . . .’ He could probably do it. The security at the dealership was basic. It might be the only way to find out the real plan so Kat could stop it.
Luke glanced around, as if assessing what he could get away with. ‘Why do you think you have a choice? We let you in on the plan because we thought you could handle it. You don’t get to be a pussy now. You owe us.’
‘You don’t want to make Tru unhappy,’ said Justin. It sounded like he spoke from experience.
Luke hissed through his teeth, the sharp sound making Wesley meet his eye. ‘He’s right. We’ve already told you too much, and Tru doesn’t want any loose ends. We’ve got all the evidence of what you did to Kat, and there are plenty of other things we can pin on you.’
An empty threat. It had to be.
Luke reached out and squeezed his shoulder hard. ‘You help us get a car, and you’re a legend, mate.’
Wesley glanced over his shoulder and swallowed hard. It was the only way. ‘Okay.’
When Luke took his hand away he didn’t seem pleased. He looked relieved.
‘But you have to tell me what he’s going to do with it.’
‘We’ve been keeping track of Tinker on social media. Whenever she stays in a hotel or something she gets it for free as long as she posts about it, right?’ Luke was clearly pleased with his cunning, nerves slipping away as he spoke. ‘That means we’ll know where she’s staying before the convention, what route she’ll take to get there. Everything. All we have to do is keep watch and pick her up when she’s on the street.’
‘And then what?’
Luke leaned back and smiled. ‘I told you. Tru’s going to film a video.’
It was simple enough that it might work. Simple enough that it could be stopped.
‘Be at the dealership with keys tonight at two a.m.,’ said Luke.
Wesley wished he could confirm that Kat had heard, that she understood what she needed to do. It might have stopped his hands shaking when he gave them a nod and left the table behind.
24
Down Will Come Baby
It hardly seemed fair that Kat could be invisible and have a stalker at the same time, but she had long since given up on the world playing by the rules. The boy followed her at a distance as she hurried away from school, always lagging slightly behind as if he was on the end of a slack length of string. Orange T-shirt. Torn jeans. Whatever power was drawing him here hadn’t allowed him to change since she had s
tepped inside his body at the march.
The way he didn’t see her was different now. Before, people seemed to know she was present but simply didn’t care. Since fading further it really was as if she was invisible, as if the entire world was forgetting her.
At least his presence proved that it hadn’t been a dream or hallucination. She really had inhabited him, if only for a few seconds. Perhaps some small part of her was left behind, enough to have quickened the fade and brought him in search of its parent.
It really could be the key to saving Tinker. Hide inside her body when they take her, cling on long enough to reach their hideout, and then . . . what? Break her chains and kung fu her way out of there? They certainly wouldn’t be expecting it.
The boy was catching up. Kat increased her pace and took out her phone. There was only one person she could talk to about this.
Do you have somebody hanging around outside your house today?
Safa’s reply was almost instant. I WAS JUST MESSAGING YOU!!! Whistle woman is outside and she looks pissed. I think she wants revenge.
Kat couldn’t help but laugh. It must be some side effect of what we did.
It’s CREEPY.
Glancing over her shoulder, Kat felt oddly fond of the boy. He remembered her, in his way, when almost nobody else did. She hoped she hadn’t ruined his date.
It follows, she messaged Safa.
DON’T. Can you meet me in town? I wanna show you something.
No apology – not even any recognition – for what had happened at the march. Kat should have refused. Except she was hardly in a position to turn down company.
It was a welcome surprise to find the entire complement of the Lonely People waiting for him at the gates. Robbie wore a resistant expression, like he wanted to pretend he had been frogmarched there, but it wasn’t fooling anybody.
‘Thanks for coming,’ Wesley said.
‘You can stop thanking us,’ replied Aoife. ‘We want to be here.’
Apparently Selena had only agreed to meet them if it was somewhere away from her old home. They waited for a bus that would take them there and made their way to the back seats.