by C. D. Gorri
“I, um, I don’t know. I mean, I knew something was going on here, but not what exactly.” I shifted under her now aquamarine gaze.
“You know, normals, or non-magic people, can read auras too. But I sensed you did not like it.”
“Must be a Werewolf thing.”
“No, Werewolves smell magic. They can’t feel it or see it unless it is from their Wolves or the moon. You feel it. You are different, Grazi, but I expect you know that already.” I didn’t know what I should say. How much to reveal. I shrugged and decided to come to the point.
“She’s not answering me. My Wolf.”
“Ah. For how long?”
“A day or so.” 28 hours, 19 minutes, 32 seconds. She sprung up from her position on the rug and began gathering some things. Herbs and a white candle. Then she wrote down something, instructions maybe, on a piece of paper with a jumbo blue crayon. Ookay.
“I just love the smell of crayons. Don’t you?” she asked and actually bent to sniff the crayon. As for myself, I never really thought about it, so I stayed silent.
“Okay, I want you to brew this tea tonight before bed. Make sure the water is boiling not tepid when you brew it! This is important. Also light this candle by the window, the closer you can get it to a moonbeam the better. Now, let me walk you downstairs. Sweet Angela is just finishing her pedicure. I do love that girl. Her grandmother was a genius, you know.”
We had been up there longer than I thought. I followed her down the steps having placed the candle and the pouch with the tea in the pocket of my new jeans. I wondered what Uncle Sean would say if he knew I’d done this. I tried not to think about it.
“Hello Angela, how is your father then?” Sherry kissed Angela’s cheek and my friend blushed prettily. “I have got the greatest thing ever for your gorgeous curls my sweet girl! Let me get it in the backroom while I get Grazi her face wash.”
“I didn’t want any-” I stopped when Angela looked at me with a raised eyebrow.
“Um yeah, thanks. I, uh, went to ask for some advice on cleansers for my skin.”
“But Grazi, your skin is totally clear.”
“Well, I want it to stay that way.” I smiled, a little weakly I admit, but she seemed to buy it. Sherry came back shortly with a bag for each of us. She pulled me over to the side while Angela paid her bill and whispered in my ear.
“You won’t need another hair removal treatment as long as you use this face wash and this lotion the week before and the week after the full moon. Don’t worry I have many female Werewolf clients who buy this and it works great. It is completely natural.” I felt my cheeks heat up. Being a Werewolf was cool, but it did have its side effects. I’m such a freak.
“It is no big deal, use it. On the house.”
“But I can pay-”
“Next time.” She smiled and swept out of the room. I was glad she had whispered about my little um, problem. I was a tad embarrassed. I mean what teenage girl likes to discuss upper lip hair?
Angela had her driver take me home first and I promised to text her later. I brought my new things to my room and sat looking at all the bags. I had never been shopping like this before in my life. Maybe I really did have buyer’s remorse.
I put all of my new things away. Lingering on the pouch and candle from Sherry. Where should I put that? I decided on the same drawer where I kept my mom’s diary. I gathered the things I bought Nonna and went to the kitchen to find her. She had the small TV on in the corner and was watching a soap opera when I walked in. She was brewing some herbal tea.
“Ciao, Maria.”
“Ciao, Nonna.” I kissed her cheek and handed her the package.
“What for me? Why you waste your money?” I could tell she was pleased though by her smile. She always looked younger when she smiled. Nonna opened her salt and candle.
“Beautiful, Maria. Thank you.” She placed the candle on the windowsill and put the jar of pink Himalayan sea salt next to her ever present bottle of pure olive oil. She always kept that and salt and black pepper within easy reach of the stove for when she cooked. Which of course, was always. My stomach rumbled and she laughed, but it didn’t sound happy.
“Hungry again, si? The roast will be ready soon and mashed potatoes. Go wash up and come back in half an hour. Then we go to church?” I could hear the question in her voice. I always went to Church with Nonna. But I guess lately I had been busy, you know, with Werewolf stuff. I nodded my head. Tonight I’d go. I sort of missed the peace that went along with attending Mass with her.
Church was pretty empty for a Saturday night. The pews had lost their furniture polish smell. It was replaced by the stronger scent of burning candles and incense. More people seemed to attend Mass during the holidays. Fr. Verrell often added Masses during the season to accommodate members.
He gave a brief homily focusing on the importance of giving during the holiday season. It was usually the Church’s busiest time of year. That mad rush of people wanting to clear their consciences doing good for the poor from before Thanksgiving till New Year’s. I suppose a lot of them were hypocrites, but we always gave. Besides I don’t think God cares when you help, just as long as you do.
Nonna had me bring in two grocery bags with canned goods and other non-perishables for the food pantry. She was a regular donor, but went all out during the holidays including some of her homemade jams and jellies. We’d be baking pies next week for the service club that provides Thanksgiving dinners to families who cannot afford it.
Wow. Thanksgiving was soon! And with it my birthday. Sixteen. I couldn’t believe I was going to be sixteen. So much has passed in my sixteen years. I looked down at my hands. They were rough and callused from my years of yard work and the past few weeks of learning to fight and spar.
I had never thought of myself as a particularly physical or violent person. I found I liked it. Not violence, but exercise. If I was being totally honest with myself I could admit I enjoyed sparring with Cara. Ooh and of course my runs with Ronan. Maybe it was the Wolf in me? I didn’t know. I needed to ask her. If she would just answer me.
As soon as Mass was over we went outside and got into Uncle Vito’s pick-up truck. He was on time as usual. The engine revved and the familiar smells of weed killer, mulch, and a variety of other things having to do with his garden center hit me head on.
He winked cheerfully as he pumped up the volume on his old Bruce Springsteen CD. He sang along with Thunder Road, pleasantly off key as usual. I was genuinely fond of my mother’s brother and I smiled at his antics.
“I don’t know how you stand this man! He’s not Sinatra. I’m telling you, Vito. Now that was a real singer, si.” It was the same old argument. Nonna and Uncle Vito often argued singers. Especially those two Jersey boys.
“Mama, Bruce Springsteen, is the single most popular rock star to come out of New Jersey. It’s a fact.”
“Frank Sinatra is the biggest star.”
“I hate to butt in, but you are both forgetting other famous New Jersey natives like Connie Frances, Bon Jovi, Queen Latifah, the Jonas Brothers!” I laughed as they really went at it. Both arguing for their favorites.
We got home to find the house empty. Aunt Theresa had Rebecca with her at a mother daughter tea and Julianna was out. Uncle Vito went to his room after kissing his mom goodnight and patting my head.
“I go lay down now, Maria. Buona notte.” Nonna looked tired. I gave her a kiss and she headed up the stairs.
“Night Nonna.” I went to the back door and opened it. I could hear, just faintly, the strains of a piano pouring through the night. It was lovely.
Mmm, Ronan. I listened for a moment before heading upstairs to my room. So many changes, so many secrets. How was I to handle them all? A Werewolf? An heiress? Sebby? Ronan? A prophecy? Dreamwalker?
It was like a million voices were crying out at me for attention. There was only one I wanted to hear, but she was still silent. As the dead.
I took the pouch and candle from t
he drawer by my bed along with the little note Sherry had written me. Per her instructions I placed the candle on the windowsill and lit it. Soft moonlight shone down. I placed the candle directly in a moonbeam. That was a good sign, right?
I plugged in the electric kettle I had brought upstairs and waited for it to whistle. When the water was boiling I poured it in my favorite yellow duck shaped mug. The contents of the pouch sizzled when the water hit them and turned blue for a moment.
I let it steep for three minutes as per the note. The room filled with the smell of herbs. Most of which I recognized. The subtle fragrance of cinnamon and apples underneath it all, like Sherry’s anima magicae.
I reread the last line in her note. Drink the tea and focus on the candle flame. Do this for as long as it takes. Keep your questions in your mind and she will hear you. Whether she answers or not that is up to the Wolf.
I sipped the hot tea. It scolded as it went down my throat. Still I found the aroma and after effects soothing. Hypnotizing even. I stared at the candle flame and wondered as it changed from yellow to blue then white. The scent it gave off reminded me of pine needles and snow and Ronan. I wanted to keep him off my mind. I tried to, but there he was. With me.
I felt a familiar hum of electricity in the air. I got so excited I wanted to shout, to yell, to dance. I forced myself to remain silent and continued to stare at the flame. And voila! There she was, my Wolf. I had never felt so happy, angry and relieved all at once before. Then I noticed her position. She was curled on the floor. Tired.
Hello, little one.
What’s wrong? Why haven’t you answered?
I have. You just didn’t listen. She sat up and tilted her head. She settled back down almost immediately.
What is it? Are you ill?
It’s okay, you are safe. Not ill. I am changing I think. We are more than what I am. You need to ready yourself for what is coming.
How can I do that without you?
I will try and be more responsive. But you know what it is I am gearing up for.
An image appeared in my head. A boy. Sickly, dirty, tied to a bed. A bat faced fiend sucking blood from a vicious bite wound in his arm. I became enraged and my Wolf, she snarled.
Yes, we must bring him back, but we have to wait. One moon more and he will be ready.
What do you mean?
You know what I mean. You simply have yet to understand.
Will you be okay?
Of course. So will you. We are one. Let me rest. You will need me soon.
I opened my eyes and the first thing I understood was hours had passed. The candle was burned down to nothing and the tea in my cup was iced over. I kept the thermostat in my room low, but this seemed too much to be natural.
I opened a window and the chilled night air swept through my room erasing the smell of candle fire and magic tea. The Dreamcatcher over my bed that Alessio had made me danced in the breeze. It seemed larger than before. As if it had indeed caught a few dreams or nightmares and swallowed them up.
My cell phone buzzed. Uh oh. I missed a training session. Ronan was texting me again. I ran to the bathroom and washed my face. By the time I got downstairs it was dark and quiet. Nonna left me a turkey on rye toast as a midnight snack. My stomach rumbled and I ate quickly. I tied my new Nikes and left the house quietly as I could. If I hurried I’d catch him.
I ran around to the back and headed into the woods. I sniffed the air. That way. I ran as quickly as I could and that was pretty fast, but he was angry. I could smell it on him. I hurried, but he was faster still.
“Ronan! Ronan. Wait!” He ignored me. Great! What did I do? Finally I was one length behind him and we were going uphill. He was always slower uphill than I was. I grabbed his shoulder and he finally stopped. He was breathing heavy and his green eyes looked cold in their anger.
“What?”
“I’m sorry. I-”
“Don’t tell me, I don’t want to know! Grazi, you can’t mess with Witches. It’s not right. Candles and magic! I saw you. If I did, anyone could!”
“Well, who else could see me? Why would you be looking at me through my widow anyway?”
“I was worried about you. You didn’t answer my texts.”
“I heard you playing. I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“Why? Why go to the Witch?”
“Look I know it’s hard for you to understand because you’ve been told your whole life Witches are bad and all, but Sherry is not bad. She’s good. Her magic smells like apple pie for Pete’s sake! How could she be bad?” Ronan grunted, but I could tell he wasn’t ready to agree.
“For my sake, will you just try to have an open mind? The tea helped me relax and the candle to focus so I could talk to my Wolf. There were no spells. She wasn’t answering and I was scared.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“Do you talk to yours?”
“Well, it’s not talking so much as you and I can, but impressions. Occasionally there are words, but our language is more imagery and physical. You are the only Werewolf I know of who speaks to her Wolf regularly. It usually takes years to form such a strong connection. Only the ancient and the wise have succeeded with that level of communication.”
“I didn’t know that. I’m sorry. I just, I felt lost without it.”
“I’ll try and understand, Maria. Just, talk to me. So I know what’s going on with you. Okay?”
“Okay.”
We ran back in silence. Ronan was still angry, but I understood it for what it was now. He was worried. About me. It was strange and new. This feeling of having to explain what I was doing to someone else. Because he cared. I am not sure how much or in what way. But he does. That much I know. It warmed me, that knowledge. That there was someone out there who wanted to keep me safe.
We slowed to a walk and stopped before we headed home, to my backyard. I felt foolish and nervous. It just occurred to me it was the middle of the night. All was quiet and I was alone with Ronan. Suddenly the woods felt too small. Or we were too close. Or both.
He bent down and picked up some loose dirt. He let it fall through his fingers and rubbed his hands on his pants. I couldn’t help but notice the way his shirt tightened over the muscles on his chest. He really was strong and his physique was perfect.
I guess the Wolf in me liked that too. He was taller than me and that in and of itself was a welcome relief. I never paid much attention to muscular boys before, but I was beginning to have quite an affinity for them. Redheads too.
“So,”
“So,” I squeaked out the word and laughed a little.
“You going to get some rest then?”
“I was going to read some more tonight.”
“Did you want company?” His tone was blank. Maybe I was reading too much into it. I mean, I did, I wanted his company. So very much, but I didn’t think I could trust myself alone with him.
Even now I wanted to reach out and touch him. Breathe him in. Make sure he was real. But I needed to straighten things out with Sebby first. It wasn’t fair to either of us to do anything until that was settled.
“Um, I’m fine.”
“Alright then.” He left the way he came. A small jump over the fence and he landed soundlessly on the other side. Disappearing into the night. I headed to my room much the same way. I never tried it before but I crouched and sprung up to my windowsill in one leap. I’m glad I left it open.
“It’s just the dentist, Grazi. It will be fine.” Nonna walked me into the office of my pediatric dentist. The same one I had been going to since I was three. The walls were covered in hand painted murals of plaque and cavity fighting superheroes. I used to love it when I was a kid.
The sterile smell of the office filled my nostrils and underneath it I could pick up each person’s unique odor. The poor little boy walking out of the room with his swollen face and gauze stuffed mouth made me feel sad for a second.
Then I realized he wasn’t unhappy. It was his m
om. She looked even worse than the boy who was proudly holding a little plastic dinosaur from Dr. Goldwyn’s prize box. He held it up and I gave him a thumbs up. Cute kid.
“Grazi Kelly.” The hygienist called my name and I got up and followed her into the brightly painted room. I sat in the lemon yellow chair and waited while she fastened my bib.
“Just a cleaning and some pictures, okay?” She was young, maybe her early twenties and had a cheerful smile. Her bright pink uniform had cartoon characters on the top and she paired it with lime green Crocs on her feet. She covered me with the heavy led apron and positioned the camera next to my face.
“Open just a little bit and bite down.” I did, not realizing my strength, and bit the little plastic film in half.
“Oops. Hmm. Must have been broken. Sorry about that let’s try it again.” This time I barely held the fragile film between my teeth. She left the room and flicked the switch.
“Um, the doctor will be in shortly to review your x-rays. In the meantime I’ll have you, uh, rinse and spit. Yeah, okay.” She sounded nervous and when I inhaled I could tell she was. A whole lot nervous. I turned and looked at the x-rays when she stepped out. That’s when I saw what she had seen. Maybe coming here wasn’t the best idea.
It was as if my Wolf teeth were superimposed over my human teeth in the x-ray. Like a spoof or something. Huge, sharp fangs were floating over my normal ones like a photo-shopped picture of a ghost you’d find on the internet.
Except I knew that those fangs along with their complete set of razor sharp smaller teeth were totally real. I tried to get out of the seat and get my hands on them. But it was too late. Dr. Goldwyn walked in.
“Hi there, Maria. How are you and your grandmother?” He wore his usual white doctor’s coat with a hideously printed shirt underneath. It was a white Hawaiian style shirt with pink and orange hibiscus flowers everywhere.
“Let’s see what’s going on here. Jenny was speechless. Huh. Looks like this film must be corrupt. Do you mind if we try again?” His calm tone warred with the acidic odor he was giving off.
Four more times. He took the x-rays four more times. It was pretty exhausting having to close my mouth as gently as possible so as not to break the plastic film with my teeth. Sheesh, I was sweating by the time he gave up on them. Four more times and they were all the same. As I knew they would be.