by TIME, S. O.
I nod. He sets the tea down on the small table next to us, picks up a cup, and takes a sip before sitting back in the chair.
“Have some tea, it’ll put you at ease.”
I nod again, picking up the other porcelain cup and taking a sip. It’s slightly bitter, but has a sweet aftertaste. A pleasant warmth ripples through my body as it makes its way through me. I hadn’t realized how cold I was. I keep the cup in my hands.
“Can you tell me what happened?” I ask, my voice low. Kou’s expression softens and he laughs.
“Yes. Let’s pick up from where we left off. A lot of this doesn’t add up.”
He sits forward in his chair, tapping at his chin with his finger in a gesture reminiscent of his mother.
“For starters, are you crazy? How could you stand beside a nymian and do nothing?” He puts his hands on his head and shakes it. “I’ve never even seen a nymian outside of the videologs; they’re supposed to be extinct from this solar system. How did it get here? Why did it look so gross and sick? How did you get here? Why are you—”
“That’s enough, Kou!” I hear. A translucent, lifelike projection of Hana appears behind Kou and walks toward us, arms crossed.
“But ma—”
“No buts!” she demands. Kou quiets down and crosses his arms. Hana’s image turns to me and smiles, clasping her hands together. “I apologize for not coming back up in person, but I have quite a bit of work to do. I initially thought it best to ask at a later time, but I think I’d rather ask now. I’d appreciate it if you would come down to the lab for a chat if you’re up for it.”
I glance at Kou and return my gaze to Hana’s holographic form. I nod.
“Great! I’ll see you shortly!” she says before her transmission ends and I’m left alone with a pouting Kou.
“I was only gonna ask a few questions,” Kou grumbles. I smile.
“I promise to try and answer all of your questions when I get back.”
“Deal!” he shouts back, shooting out of his seat. “I gotta hand it to Hitori, the pouting face really does work,” he smirks. “Hurry up and change. I’ll take you to the elevator when you’re ready.”
He gets up from his seat and walks out.
#
I follow Kou to the hidden elevator that leads to the basement. “You see this wall right here? It’s not actually a wall!” He slaps his hand onto the hidden panel and the elevator door opens.
“Oooh,” I respond dramatically.
“I know, super top-secret stuff. Anyway, just step inside and it’ll take you to where you need to go.”
I laugh at Kou’s statement and he looks at me, puzzled by my sudden outburst. I wave it off and enter the elevator. On my way down to the basement, I look at the soft indoor shoes they provided me. Who would have imagined Death wearing slippers?
Instead of going down to the facility entrance that I had followed Kou through previously, I stop a few levels below it. When the elevator doors open, I’m greeted by a plain white room. A pleasant automated voice asks me to “Step into the marked circle for decontamination.”
Decontamination? I do as ordered and a warm orange light runs up and down my body. A cheery little sound goes off, and a light above the door in front of me turns blue.
The door opens to a huge garden under an artificial sky. Stone walkways lead through the plants and smooth benches offer rest under the canopies of different colored trees. A synthetic orb hovers above the area, illuminating the greenery like a sun, and some kind of hologram technology gives the impression that I am under a blue sky rather than deep underground.
“Incredible, isn’t it?” I hear from beside me. I turn to see Hana standing next to a violet rose that changes colors in spots that she touches with her hand.
“I have no words to describe it,” I respond. Hana smiles.
“I’m sorry for calling you out here so soon after your recovery, but there are things we must talk about.” She gestures toward the path before us. “Would you care for a walk?”
I nod and fall into step beside her. We stroll past a pond with lilies gently gliding on its surface. I notice myself panting slightly as I try to keep Hana’s pace. A slight breeze wafting through the garden cools my face.
“I can’t believe the amount of detail,” I say.
“It was a labor of love. I wanted it to be perfect for her.”
“For her?”
Hana’s energy twitches slightly, and she doesn’t reply.
“Dr. Kurosawa, is everything alright?” I ask.
“Yes, of course.” Her reply is automatic as her gaze travels over the flowers. I feel an odd anxiety, a prickling of need to know what is wrong and fix it for her.
“Are you sure? Because it seems like you have layers of worry on you,” I say without thinking. It’s then that Hana stops walking.
“I’m sorry, Doctor, I didn’t mean to press,” I begin, my face heating up, but Hana shakes her head and her energy mixes with emotion.
“Please, call me Hana.” she says, smiling softly. It seems genuine. “I was simply caught off guard. My husband made comments like that all the time. He had a knack for always knowing when something was the matter.”
Come to think of it, there’s not much I know about Kou’s father. I’ve never really heard mention of him.
“Follow me.” She walks away from the path to another section of the garden. She reaches out to the empty air, but her hand makes contact with a hard surface. She knocks on it, like a door.
“Coming,” says a voice. The air ripples like a curtain being pulled aside, and suddenly we are face to face with a woman wearing a white summer dress. Her skin is the same dark shade as Hana’s, and her long, black hair hangs loose under a simple white sunhat. Yet, she feels bizarrely incomplete to me. After a confused second, I realize that no energy fills her form. It's like looking at a perfect doll. That’s when I realize I’m looking at a hologram. It’s far more advanced than the semi-transparent hologram I had seen of Hana earlier—this one appears completely solid, and her skin tones accurately reflect shadows and brightness from the surrounding environment.
“Finally, I can step out of that place,” she says as she places her hand on her forehead dramatically. “Oh, hath my savior finally cometh, mother? My, he looks so young!” the woman declares. “Have you returned from a masquerade? Where’s your suit?”
Hana laughs and turns to me. “This is my daughter, Aldrea. Kou’s older sister.”
My eyebrows raise in surprise. In all the months I spent watching Kou and Hitori, they had never visited this place or mentioned that Kou had a sibling.
“Pleased to meet you,” Aldrea says as she performs a curtsy. “Mother says you’re the key to making my real-world debut.”
I look back and forth between them, unsure of what to say.
“...I actually haven’t told him that part yet,” Hana says apologetically.
“Great, I probably look like I’m crazy now. Thanks for that one, mom.”
“I was getting to it. Aldrea, please turn around.”
The hologram turns and lifts up her hair. The outer ring of a condenser appears to be sunk into the back of her neck, but no condenser is attached. She lowers her hands and her long hair covers the spot back up.
“I was born with an incompatibility to condensers from birth. I can’t collect ambient energy the same as everyone else, and I get sick really easily without the protection that a condenser gives,” Aldrea explains.
Hana gives me a hopeful smile. “The reason I created this garden was so that my daughter could see the outside world. She couldn’t experience it otherwise.”
“Why do you think I can help you leave this room?” I ask, no less confused after their revelations. Hana answers.
“I have a design for a new condenser—a more powerful one that integrates more fully with the nervous system and interacts directly with the immune system. I’m confident that it would be sufficient to allow Aldrea to finally leave here
and live freely in the world. But I’m missing a key component, a material that we’ve been unable to manufacture. I’ve identified a planet that has it, but it’s too far to reach with our current tech.”
I begin to see the shape of her hopes for me, and I try to keep the nervousness from my face.
“I saw the way you sent that nymian away,” Hana continues. “Allow me to study how you create portals. Above us is a room with a large transporter—I’m designing it to help us cross spacetime and reach the material we need. Without the transporter, it will take decades to reach, and that’s time we do not have. I’m certain that if I could study your portals, I’ll finally be able to determine how to get the transporter working.” Hana holds out her hand and gives me a shaky smile. Her energy is churning with anxiety.
“Will you help us?”
Chapter Ten
I hesitate to take Hana’s hand, thinking back to the moment in the room with Kou and Hitori when I couldn’t open a Tear. I’m not sure if I would have been able to open one if Hana hadn’t entered when she did. Aldrea’s hopeful gaze presses down on me, the weight of her expectations keeping my arm at my side.
There’s no way I can promise them that I can open another Tear.
For a moment I consider voicing my concerns, but it’s then that I sense something farther inside the building. The emotion feels strange—rusty, as if it hadn’t been felt in a while. It flutters delicately, as if afraid to be felt in full force. It’s hope—a cautious, unfamiliar hope.
I don’t answer Hana’s question but instead walk toward the space where Aldrea first appeared. Hana steps in my direction but Aldrea raises her hand, signaling her to stop. She must know that I sense the truth behind this passage. With a single step forward the garden disappears, replaced by a sterile white hallway lined with doors at exact intervals. As I continue down the corridor, I hear machinery farther ahead. I follow the sound to a large glass window at the end of the corridor.
Through the viewing glass I find the source of the emotion—an emaciated woman lying on an elevated platform. Her torso is hidden under a round machine, and tubes reach out of her mouth and nose. Her skin is an ashy, grey-ish white, further discolored by bruise-like spots and covered in a faint sheen of sweat. The angles of her bones show all too clearly. It looks as though a good shake could shatter her. A white helmet covers her head, multiple wires connecting the gear to another machine.
“I guess you found me,” I hear from behind. “The real ugliness inside.”
Though Aldrea speaks at my side, it’s the body inside the machine that emanates the resignation and disgust that wash over me. Unlike the hope, which still hovers faintly around her form, these negative emotions feel strong and old, etched into her energy so many times that they have become jagged scars.
“We’re out of options.” Hana says as she walks in behind us. For the first time, she sounds truly tired.
“Please.”
Aldrea’s simple plea breaks through my doubts—the thought of leaving her trapped here becomes repugnant. The idea of denying her ceases to be an option.
I turn around and shake Hana’s hand.
“Thank you,” she says, relief making her smile soft. “This will finally bring us the breakthrough we’ve been looking for.”
We turn away from the window and head back toward the garden, led by Aldrea. She clearly doesn’t enjoy being near her body.
Nearing the exit, Aldrea falls into step beside me. “I know it’s weird but…you can’t tell Kou about any of this. He doesn’t know about me,” Aldrea says, confirming my suspicions.
“Why not? You’re his sister. Surely he’d want to visit.”
Aldrea looks down and shakes her head. “It’s better this way…In case anything happens. He’s already lost dad…”
She says nothing more, but a cold loneliness emanates from her energy. Back under the artificial sun, Hana takes a rectangular device from a pocket in her lab coat and turns it on, pointing it in my direction. “Do you think you could show us a Tear now?” she asks.
My determination renewed, I raise my arm and visibly see it shake.
“Don’t worry about its size, anything is better than nothing,” Hana says quickly.
Aldrea turns to look at Hana. “Mom…”
“Aldrea, let’s let him concentrate.”
Hana inches forward, her intent gaze darting between me and the screen of her device.
I try to pull the energy to my hand and am immediately hit with a wave of dizziness. The image of Aldrea's sickened form flashes through my mind and I fight back the vertigo, reaching again for that well of power within me. My head pounds as I continue to concentrate, and suddenly I collapse to my knees. I fight to remain conscious as my body ripples with a feverish chill.
“Are you alright?” Hana is immediately at my side. I cough briefly and she helps me to my feet.
“Mom!” Aldrea shouts.
“I know, I apologize,” Hana replies. She sighs heavily. “It looks like my suspicions were correct. Whatever planet you came from must be very different to ours. Your vital signs are weaker than what we find normal here. The smaller size of your heart, the lower density of your bones. You don’t appear malnourished, so I’ve ruled that out, but compared to us, your body seems to have gone through some kind of extended atrophy.” I sense sincerity in her voice, but I detect impatience and unrest in her energy.
“I’m sorry,” I say, but Hana shakes her head in response. She waits until I regain my balance before letting me go.
“No, I shouldn’t have asked you to do that so soon.” She glances at Aldrea, who nods reassuringly, then turns back to me. “We’ll have a better room made up for you shortly. I’ll have our techs modify a sleeping pod for you to help you adapt to our environment better.”
I nod my thanks but tense up.
“Is there something else?” Hana asks, sensing my hesitation.
“I’d like to attend university with Kou and Hitori,” I finally say.
Hana lowers her brows for a moment before responding.
“That’s unexpected. Why would you request that?”
I think carefully about my answer, reluctant to lie but fully aware that I have to say something.
“I think I need to be outside if I’m ever going to get my memories back. I feel a connection to this world—and Kou, since he saved my life. B-Besides, moving outside will help my body adjust better to the world,” I say, hoping that my scramble for a reasonable explanation does not show on my face.
Neither Hana nor Aldrea respond. Hana takes a long, hard look at me and purses her lips. Aldrea turns her attention to her mother and the silence between us is momentarily filled by the fabricated breeze running through the garden. Finally, Hana puts her hands on her hips.
“I’ll pull some strings and get you enrolled. You’ll have to manage with the curriculum as an actual student and perform well enough that it doesn’t cause too many questions. That’s all I can do.”
My shoulders relax and drop. “Thank you so—”
“However,” Hana interrupts, “I need you to come down here regularly and help me with my research. After you recover, I expect that you’ll fulfill your end of the deal and help me with the portal.”
I nod.
“I will.”
With that, Hana finally smiles once more. Aldrea walks up to me.
“It was nice meeting you. Um, I’m sorry, I don’t think you’ve shared your name.”
My mind flashes back to the suit Kou was given in the lab.
Toivo.
“I…don’t really remember it,” I reply.
“Oh…well you could start fresh here until you regain your memories. You could be anyone. Any thoughts?”
“That’s not a bad idea,” I say with a genuine smile. I think about the comment Hana made about how young I look despite how much older I am than everyone here.
“Eiji. Call me Eiji.”
“Alright, Eiji. I’ll have someone h
elp you back to your room. Should you need anything, please use this to call for assistance,” Hana says, handing me a small glass communicator.
“See ya around, Eiji,” Aldrea smiles. We all bow and Hana leads me back to the cleanroom with the elevator. When I glance back, Aldrea is staring up at the fake clouds.
#
Five days later, outside the entrance to the Kurosawa mansion, I imagine the room I’m staying in as my destination and try to open a Tear. The air circles around me gently as I build up energy, swaying the branches of the nearby trees and knocking some of their leaves loose. But nothing more happens. I don’t feel pain or faintness as I did before, but the improvement is irrelevant if I can’t also create Tears. Not only am I stuck in this time, but I can’t even open a Tear to help me stay with the only people who might have answers. Moving around is a lot easier now, but that doesn’t matter if it’s not helping with the Tear.
I have to show Hana that I can open one. If I can’t, I don’t see a reason for her to let me stay. I drop my arm to my side. Where is Naomi now that I need her most?
“I told you he couldn’t do it,” I hear from behind me. Hitori. She walks next to Kou, both wearing their uniforms.
“Looking sharp.” Kou says, ignoring Hitori’s comment. My uniform matches theirs, and the emblems on my shoulders are identical to Kou’s. Hana thought it best if I passed as a distant cousin of the Kurosawa house.
“Are you sure you’re really up for this?” he asks.
“I need answers. I think this is how I’ll find my memories,” I respond. Kou nods.
I turn toward the transport pod waiting for us ahead and Kou lets out a startled shout.
“Hey! Mom really did it! Your blue crystal looks totally real.”
I smile weakly, reaching back and touching the condenser Hana had implanted a few days before. As I recall the conversation with Hana, my other hand instinctively reaches into my pocket, where a thumb-sized device is hiding.
“I don’t understand why you don’t have a color. You should technically be dead,” Hana said, tapping her fingers against her chin as she studied the back of my neck. The condenser implantation had gone smoothly, but no color arose into one of the crystal slots. “Well, this complicates matters. I can hardly send you to the premier condenser training school if your condenser has no crystal.”