by Mika West
My brows furrowed. “We’re exchanging gifts? But I don’t have anything for you.”
“You’ve given me more than I deserve this past month, Luce.” He came back with a long velvet box and opened it revealing a rose gold necklace with a diamond-encrusted heart-shaped pendant.
My mouth fell open. “Ryan, I can’t accept—”
“You can and will accept it because we’re together now, remember? Maxi helped me pick it out while you were still in the hospital and Becky approved.”
I smiled “It’s beautiful.”
“I’m glad you like it.” He took it from the box and clasped it around my neck. It’s more than just a gift, Lucy. It’s a promise.”
My brows furrowed. “A promise, what do you mean?”
“My love, one day I’m going to ask you to marry me. I can’t do it now, tomorrow or even next month because I know you better than most, Lucy Wells. You’re going to tell me that it’s too soon. And you’d be right. We have the girls to think of; we have to be careful with their hearts. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t want to get down on my knee right now and make you mine. I love you so damn much. So instead, I am going to court you.”
I snickered but my eyes filled with happy tears. “Oh, is that still a thing in this century?"
“If it’s not, we’re going to bring it back. I am going to wine and dine you and shower you with gifts and love because you deserve all of that and more. We are going to get to know each other even more than we already do. And until I officially propose, when you look at this necklace, remember that you hold my heart.”
Tears streamed down my face. “Oh, Ryan. I don’t know what to say.” The man I loved had just given me a lovely gift—a promise—that held such deep meaning. He’d poured his heart out, telling me everything I had wanted to hear and there I was a sniveling mess.
“Just tell me one thing: that you see yourself marrying me, and raising a family with me. Maxi and Becky adore you, and I know you adore them. But I want to have more kids… with you, Luce. It took me a long time to figure out that you’re the woman for me, but I did, and I just need to know that you have the same dreams as me.”
Sniffing, I hugged him, made awkward with my injured arm. “I do, Ryan, those are my dreams too. I see all of that happening. I want all of it with you; a family, a home, a life together. ”
He let out a breath and held my face. "You've made me a very happy man, Lucy Wells and now I'm going to make more of your dreams come true." As he leaned in to kiss me, we sank back onto the bed, his hands lovingly caressing my skin as our limbs tangled up in the sheets.
“Merry Kissmas!” Maxi shouted as she pecked me on the cheek, finally letting go my hand. She excitedly led me back inside the house and under the mistletoe, after a walk that left me confused. She had randomly asked for me to take her to the park. Why she wanted to go to the park when it was freezing outside, I had no idea. But it was Christmas, and she had pleaded. I had given in, of course, and bundled her up in as many layers possible.
“Merry Christmas!” a chorus of voices rang out.
I jumped, clutching my chest. Standing there was Ryan with Becky in one arm, Eric and his new girlfriend, Karen, and Charlie, all grinning at me. The dining table was gorgeously decorated, and various delicious looking dishes lined the center. I glanced at Ryan who winked. I had told him about the dream I’d had, and somehow he had made it a reality.
“When did you do all of this?” I directed my question at him. “I thought I was cooking today?”
“Charlie helped. We had everything prepared in your new kitchen and brought it over while Maxi distracted you with the impromptu walk to the park.” Understanding dawned as I grinned down at her. “You sneaky little thing.”
She jumped up and down. “Uncle Ryan said I couldn’t tell you anything. I can keep a secret.”
“You sure can.” I blinked. Wait, a minute. “What new kitchen?”
Ryan stepped forward. “The one in your new headquarters.” He held up a set of keys. “Merry Kissmas.”
I stood stock still.
Maxi tugged on my hand. “You’re supposed to kiss now… it’s the law!”
Indulging her Ryan leaned in, and we kissed, but it didn't erase the shock on my face.
“I don’t understand,” I mumbled as Ryan handed over a set of shiny keys.
“I helped to pick the perfect spot,” Charlie squealed. “It’s amazing I can’t wait until you see it.”
“And I worked out all the legalities,” Eric added.
I stared at them, speechless.
“Your kitchen at home won’t be big enough for all the business that you’ll get, what with all the advertising.”
My eyes landed back on Ryan. What advertising? I didn’t have the money for that or a new shop or anything. “I can’t afford advertising—”
“You don’t have to worry about money, Luce. You have investors now. Investors that want to make your dreams come true!"
My eyes narrowed. How much had he spent? A new shop couldn’t have been cheap. It would take me a while to get used to someone spending so much on me. My pride and independence never allowed for it before Ryan. I still thought it was too soon for him to do so much. “Ryan, please tell me you didn’t—”
Again, he interrupted that time with another kiss. “Merry Kissmas, Luce. Lecture me later when our guests are gone," he whispered in my ear. “I’ll just tell you about the new car now so you can get all the outrage out of your system.”
I gasped and hissed, “Oh my God, Ryan, I can’t accept a car!”
“But your old one was totaled.”
“I know.”
“Just relax and pretend that I’m Santa Claus,” he gave me another quick kiss, then winked at Maxi who was beaming up at us. Becky puckered her lips too and leaned toward me, making me laugh. I angled my cheek for a wet kiss from the baby, still giggling. She extended chubby arms toward me, but Ryan pulled her back. “Sorry kid, you have to wait until Lucy’s arm is better.”
Maxi, slipped her hand into mine and we all walked to the table as if the four of us had been a unit for a long time.
Chatter and laughter ensued. Eric and Ryan shared wild stories about past holidays and Karen, who was quickly adopted into the group, shared stories about her students.
Every so often, I caught Ryan’s gaze, and each time my fingers would brush his gift, the heart hanging around my neck. I thought of his pre-proposal, that’s what I had started referring to it as, and grinned happily.
That Christmas was the best I’d ever had, and I was sure that every single one afterward would be amazing because the life I dreamed of had only just begun.
Happy Holidays! Keep reading for a special bonus story; my way of saying thank you!
His Naughty List
Chapter 1
I’d always loved winter. I loved the sky—that endless white that merged seamlessly into the snow-covered ground. I loved the laughter and the cozy fires and the steam of hot chocolate rising up to meet red noses. I loved lips—chapped from smiling, dusted with crumbs from cookies. I loved the music and the bells and the slush that squished beneath your boots as you walked.
Of course, that was before. Before everything went wrong.
Now, as I stared out of the large, floor-to-ceiling-windows in the break room all I could see was a sky that seemed more gray than white. The residual snow piled in mounds, dirty and hard, in the parking lot—the never-ending freeze kept them frozen and permanent. The wind was cruel and biting, and each new snow storm brought with it an ache that didn’t leave your toes, fingers, or ears, until long after you’d warmed yourself back up. Every time I looked outside I felt lonely; I felt the loss of last year just as strongly now as I had on that day—the day the warmth and pleasantness of Christmas took its last breath on a hospital bed. The day wreaths and snowflakes and carols turned into symbols of loss rather than joy. The day he—
“Uh, hello?”
The voice sta
rtled me out of my reverie. I looked away from the window to my new boss who was standing in the doorway of the break room. I wondered how long he’d been standing there watching me. Then I pondered how long I’d been absent-mindedly stirring his coffee. My cheeks flushed and all of a sudden I felt like I was a teenager all over again; my stomach flipped as I looked at him. Like it always had.
His stern gray eyes glared at me from beneath thick, furrowed brows. His jaw was clenched in annoyance as he walked over to the sink towards me, so he was standing directly in front of me, blocking any chance to escape.
“If I had time to come and get my coffee myself, I wouldn’t need someone else to do it.”
“I’m sorry, sir,” I said, hastily removing the spoon. It hit the counter with an awkward clang and a spray of coffee splattered on its white surface. “Shit.”
He looked at me with a fierce scorn as I handed over the mug with an apologetic smile.
“I’m not paying you to daydream,” he said curtly, taking a sip. He met the drink with a grimace. “It’s cold.”
“I’ll make a fresh pot,” I offered quickly.
“Don’t bother,” he said icily, turning towards the door. “Just be thankful I don’t fire you.”
After he left the room, my shoulders slumped, the tension draining away. I wet the sponge and wiped the coffee off the counter and gathered myself. My heart was racing, and I held my chest for several moments before I felt my turbulent emotions settle.
Outside the window, it had started snowing. I concentrated on the chunky flakes as they fell, calming me.
It was only my second day on the job, and already it felt like it had been an eternity. It’s just temporary, I reassured myself before ringing out the sponge and returning to my desk. I can do this. I can survive a few more weeks with him as my boss.
At the end of the day, I braved the cold of the parking lot and climbed into my old blue Jeep Cherokee. The door squeaked when I opened it. My face still stung from the wind outside, my hands felt stiff and freezing even in their gloves. It was the coldest winter we’d ever had. I breathed into my hands and rubbed them together before shivering and starting the engine. It made a long choking noise before it roared to life. It was an old car, and it needed quite a bit of maintenance. The heater had broken months ago.
With my breath coming out in white puffs, I pulled my hat tighter around my ears and caught a glance of myself in the rearview mirror. My hair hung wispy and flat around my face. I looked tired and worn out. It didn’t help of course that my emotions were run ragged just being in the same building as him.
For a second I paused, staring at myself. It was amazing how much a person can change in a year and how the unexpected can through you for a loop. How loneliness and responsibility do more to age someone than wrinkles or white hair ever could. I readjusted the mirror, put the car into drive, and started home.
At dinner, when Liv asked me about my day, I didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth. And there was no way I was going to tell her about him, or how it felt like my chest had reignited the moment I’d seen him.
“It was fine. The usual. Boring office work,” I lied.
She saw right through it. “I didn’t think it could be worse than yesterday?”
“Don’t worry about it; it was fine,” I said again. “It’s only temporary.”
“You—we don’t need this. You don’t sleep as it is; you hardly eat. You shouldn’t have quit your job at the bookshop.” I sighed and looked at my still full plate of food.
“It’s not the job,” I continued, though I felt guilty for lying to her. My sister and I shared everything normally. “It’s just a hard time of year. You know that.”
I saw her eyes lower to the table. She didn’t like to talk about Dad. She shook her head like she was trying to get rid of a fly. “If you’d just let me help. I could get a job then you could quit this one and go back to work part-time at the bookshop. Then you wouldn’t be so mopey all the time.”
“No. We’ve already talked about this. I need to work full-time, and there’s no way I’m letting you work. You need to focus on school, get good grades. Besides this pays more. We need the money.”
She sat back in her chair, and her wild, curly blonde hair fell on her face. She huffed it away and stared moodily at the wall, her lower lip stuck out like it used to when she was little.
“You’re not the boss of me, you know,” she said. I let her say this, but we both knew I was the closest thing she had to a parent, even if we didn’t verbally acknowledge it. It was us against the world.
I reached out and ruffled her hair. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I promise. Let’s change the subject, how was your day?” I flashed her my most convincing smile, but she still seemed less than pacified.
I had been so excited to get the job. I’d been looking for work for weeks when the temp agency called. I remember answering the phone—looking at the pile of overdue medical bills and mortgage statements—finally feeling a piece of the giant weight on my chest start to lift as the agent told me they’d found me something.
But now, the weight felt doubled.
I found it darkly funny. I didn’t understand why my new boss hated me so much. Yesterday, my first day, I could’ve sworn I saw a flash of recognition cross his face, and yet he seemed to have a personal vendetta against me.
I’d said hello and then, nothing, just contempt. And that dark, moody stare he threw my way whenever I saw him. Of course, I couldn’t tell Liv about it. She was my sister and best friend, and the age difference had never gotten in the way of our closeness. I wanted to talk to her more than anything, but I knew if I told her she’d storm into the building ready to take out the man who’d caused my misery. I didn’t want her to worry; she was young; it wasn’t fair to put any of the stress I felt on her. She had always been quick to act, loyal to a fault, just like Dad had been.
Secretly though, I wished I could afford to quit the job. Those severe gray eyes—always glaring—haunted me. No matter what I did, I couldn’t please him, and I had to come to terms with that.
“Are you not going to eat?” Liv asked.
I’d been staring at my food with a faraway look. For the millionth time that day I’d been lost in thought.
I shook my head and slid my plate across the too small table and took my glass to the sink. I packed away the leftovers then squeezed her tight around the shoulders before going to bed. She was the best person in the world. We were in this together but the less she knew, the better. I could handle the job for a few weeks, being around him, practically torturing my heart every single day. I could do it for her. I had to.
Chapter 2
Dad had been obsessed with Christmas and this time of year I felt his absence everywhere I went. As we approached the one-year anniversary, things felt just as raw as the day at the hospital, December 27th, when we said goodbye to the man who had been our everything. He’d been our center, our gravity. Keeping us close, secure, and safe. Now, we were just floating through space, hoping we’d soon find something tangible to grasp onto. Either that or I’d collide on some unknown planet and shatter into a million pieces.
Liv, of course, was the strongest. She was intense in everything she did. I always envied that in her, she got her passion and drive from Dad. From day one, she knew who she was and what she wanted. More importantly, she went after it. I could never be like that.
I just dropped Liv off at her school, and afterward, I stayed sitting there in the lot, remembering better times. I recalled my own days at the school well. Liv and I were polar opposites in terms of personality. When she walked onto the quad, every head turned to look. In comparison when I was in school, a girl who I’d had classes with for three years asked me if I was new. I’d walked like a shadow around those halls, my nose always stuck in a book, with barely anyone noticing me.
Liv walked towards a large group of students. They looked her way when she arrived, immediately parting and we
lcoming her. One of them said something and I saw her bend back, her body shaking with laughter. I wondered how she could turn off the sadness. I feigned cheerfulness a lot for the people around me, but I hadn’t managed a smile that big or a laugh like that in almost a year. But I was glad for her, happy that she didn’t dwell on the things that managed to catch me so unguarded.
I envied her smile not because I craved her happiness. I was only jealous of her ability to fake it. I had known Liv all her life, and I had seen all sorts of smiles—happy ones, and shy ones, and mischievous ones. And I knew that smile too, that big, beaming smile. I only ever saw that one on my little sister’s face when she needed to convince others, and herself, that every other part of her wasn’t breaking.
Liv disappeared inside the school. I’d taken to dropping Liv off at school in the mornings. I said it was for her, but, really, I think it was for me. Yet I always got an odd feeling being back there, looking at those entrance doors and musing on my memories of my high school years. It gave me a lot of mixed emotions. I’d enjoyed my classes, but I had always got along better with my teachers than I did other students. All four years went by without incident, bad or good.
Except, of course, for Tommy.
I first saw him on a brisk autumn day at the start of my sophomore year. He was tall and classically handsome, with a hard jaw and piercing eyes. Most of the other boys his age were still growing into themselves, their bodies lanky and disproportionate. But, already, he had stubble decorating his jaw and a matured athleticism that made him stand out in a crowd of boys still recovering from puberty. I asked my friend, Nicole, about him and she’d said he was new to the school, a junior, but he’d already found his place among the jocks. Immediately accepted. This was evident when he’d jumped on the back of one the footballers standing near him. He then mimed whipping him like a horse. I, of course, watched from the shadows by my locker.