Still Rattled

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Still Rattled Page 9

by Charles, Jane


  I take a seat next to them, close enough that I can see what Alex is doing but not so close that I block Alex’s light or that I’m disruptive.

  It’s fascinating to watch. I’ve seen tattoo shows, the Reeds’ especially and never missed their segments. I didn’t watch as Alex worked on mine, and it is a lot more interesting close up and real. It’s amazing how he’s making it almost 3-D, with a yellow center, with petals shading from white at the bud to pink at the tips.

  Joy’s has to ask Alex to stop a few times so she can move and stretch, taking a few drinks of water and goes back to hugging the back of the chair.

  Alex is hardly talking at all and concentrating on what he’s doing. I’d think he’d need silence when working, but he certainly carried on a conversation with me when he was doing my tat.

  A conversation that the entire world will soon hear.

  My stomach tightens again, and I mentally try and push back the anxiety.

  This isn’t exactly how I intended this night to go. I had Kelsey all to myself. We were cuddled up on the couch, watching an old movie, and I fully intended on some serious making out before the guys got back. I was not supposed to be sitting in the dining room doing another tat for Joy.

  The blood-red rose at the center of the small of her back was the first tattoo I ever did. Since then, I’ve added more and more flowers, and this garden will eventually spread to her front if Joy doesn’t expel her demons soon. Though, I’m not sure she ever will.

  I’ve been helping Joy since the first rose, yet, it wasn’t until Kelsey that I started to get why tattoos are so important to so many people like Joy. I was caught up in myself, in what I wanted, which turns out is not what I need or want at all. For Joy, this lotus flower is a temporary fix, for others, like Kelsey, it is a memory and reminder to be cherished.

  The front door slams and I look up.

  “Ah, the flower girl is here,” Christian says as he puts his saxophone case on the coffee table and throws a jacket on a chair before coming into the dining room.

  “Good night?” Joy asks.

  “Same old thing,” he says heading into the kitchen. “Anyone want a beer?”

  “Me,” Joy says.

  “Not till I’m done,” I remind her.

  He comes back in, carrying two bottles and puts one in front of Joy while looking over my shoulder. “Nice! Lotus flower.”

  “What the hell do you know about flowers?” I ask him.

  “Hey, I’ve got all kinds of information locked away up here.” He knocks on his head as he sits across from us. “You’d be amazed at my intellect.”

  I roll my eyes and go back to concentrating on Joy’s tattoo.

  Wait a minute. Why the hell is Christian here? “Didn’t you play a club tonight?”

  He leans back in the chair, balancing on the back two legs. “Yeah. Got done about half an hour ago.”

  I know I’d been working on Joy’s tat for a while, and I do lose track of time when I’m working, only stopping when the customer asks for a break. Joy took quite a few tonight, which is unusual for her. “What time is it?”

  “Just after one.”

  “One?” Kelsey sits up.

  Crap. I hope she didn’t have to get home to get up early or anything like that. I want to get this finished before taking her home. There’s not much left to do.

  “I can see you home, Kels.”

  On second thought. Joy can chill while I see Kelsey home. There is no way in hell I’m giving Christian that honor.

  “No place to be,” she assures us. “Just surprised, that’s all.” She settles back in her chair.

  “Where the hell did you go?” Ryan complains as he’s coming in the door. “You are there one minute and then when I go to look for you, they tell me you left.”

  “You were chatting up that girl with purple hair at the bar. I didn’t want to intrude.”

  Ryan drops his keys on a table, kicks off his shoes in the middle of the living room, and leaves his camera bag in front of the cold fireplace. “She was chatting me up to get information on you.”

  “You didn’t give out my number did you?”

  Ryan snorts. “I’m going to start if you keep leaving me sitting with drunk chicks who want in your pants.”

  He stomps past the dining room and into the kitchen.

  “Did you at least get any good shots?” Christian calls.

  Ryan comes back in with a beer. “Of course!” He’s rather insulted by the question and takes a seat at the table.

  “Good. Email them to Jarvis.”

  Jarvis is the band’s agent. I’ve only met the guy once and he’s just a little too smooth for my tastes. I don’t quite trust him. Since it’s not my band, I don’t exactly have a say and keep my mouth shut.

  “I’m not your damn secretary. I’ll put them on a drive and you can do what you want with them.”

  “Then they’ll be there forever.” Christian takes a swig of beer.

  “Things not going good with the band?” Joy asks.

  “Things are going too good.” He scrubs a hand over his face. “I’m just tired.”

  The front door bangs open again. “I’ve got to get out of these damn heels.”

  Zach plops down on the couch and starts unzipping his knee high, black leather platform boots. He lets out a huge sigh as he pulls them off his feet. Then he shrugs out of the massive fur coat, leaving it on the couch as he stands. Before coming into the dining room to join us, he pulls the long blond wig from his head and hangs it on the handle end of a poker by the fire place. The hair almost touches the bricks, but not quite. “Another tat, Joy?”

  She grins up at him. “A lotus flower.”

  “Nice.” He nods and heads to the kitchen.

  Kelsey grabs her empty beer bottle and takes it into the kitchen. I’m assuming she’s going to toss it.

  “Want another?” Zach asks.

  “Sure.”

  I hear the fridge open just as I’m putting the final touches on the dark pink at the tip of the flower petals.

  “You really need to show me how to put makeup on one day.”

  “You don’t need it,” I yell.

  “Since when do you care whether a girl needs make up or not?” Joy teases me quietly.

  “None of your damn business, Joy,” I mutter back. “And you certainly don’t need that pile of makeup Zach puts on his face,” I yell.

  He comes back in grinning. “Well, I’ve got to hide my ruggedly handsome looks, don’t I?”

  “Egos have never been lacking in this house,” Joy laughs.

  “I don’t care how white the walls, or how strategically the furniture is arranged, that apartment will never be roomy,” Sean announces with frustration as he enters.

  “Where were you all night?” Joy asks.

  “Painting and putting furniture together for Alyssa,” he answers.

  “Alyssa Landon?” Kelsey asks, coming in from the kitchen.

  “Yeah,” I answer.

  She nods. “Wish I would have stayed close to some of my former classmates.”

  “Why didn’t you?” Christian asks.

  She shrugs. “We had different interests. Went different ways. A couple dropped out.”

  The guys sober. Dropping out was failure. Without an education there was really no way to get ahead in life. At least for kids like us who had nothing.

  Sean leaves his bucket of tools in the foyer, then puts his tool belt on a side-table, before kicking off his work boots. “Hey, do you think there’s any lasagna left?”

  “Almost a full pan. Alex and I were the only ones who had any,” Kelsey answers and settles back in her chair next to me. I kind of like that she’s sat there all night, watching and chatting with Joy. Though if given a choice, I would have spent the entire night as we were before Joy’s text.

  The guys and Joy have stayed up talking, eating lasagna and drinking beer. A couple are at the table, and the others are in the living room. Dirty plates
and napkins litter the tables, along with empty beer bottles.

  I can’t help it but I am a little jealous. Would I have had this if I would have remained friends with the classmates I graduated with from Baxter? Would I share my apartment with them instead of two bitches and Mary?

  “Where is Dylan, anyway?” Sean asks.

  “Took his laptop and said he needed a change of scenery to work.”

  “Novel,” Christian and Zach say at the same time.

  “If he’s working on a piece for a newspaper, he does that in his room or at the table,” Alex explains. “When he’s working on his novel, he sometimes goes to an all-night diner or coffee shop.”

  “What kind of novel?” I ask.

  The guys share a look and shrug. “No idea. He doesn’t talk about it.” Alex takes a swig of his beer.

  “Be right back.” Joy jumps from her chair and runs for the stairs. “I need to look at the tattoo.” A minute later we hear a squeal. “It’s perfect!” she calls down. I can hear her feet pound down the stairs. “That’s why you’re my favorite, Alex.”

  “You just said Dylan was your favorite,” Sean points out.

  “That’s when she was shoving lasagna in her face,” corrects Zach. “I’m sure as soon as you paint her apartment or something, you’ll be her favorite.”

  Sean narrows his eyes on her. “Don’t tell me…”

  “Nope.” She smiles. “I’m all good.”

  “Like painting would make a difference,” Ryan says. “With all those plants in the window, you don’t get any sunlight in your dinky apartment.”

  The front door opens and we all look. Dylan strides in then stops. He looks around the room, from one face to the next, then at the tables and floor. “What the hell is this?”

  Zach spreads his arms out. “Pretty obvious, I think.”

  Dylan hangs his messenger bag on a hook by the door and starts picking up dirty plates while kicking shoes out of the way. He stops on his way to the kitchen and looks at me. “Instead of one Oscar Madison, I’m stuck living with five. I’ve not even been gone twelve hours and they’ve trashed the place.”

  What’s he talking about? “Who is Oscar Madison?”

  The guys burst out laughing. “Odd Couple?”

  That sounds vaguely familiar but I’m still not making the connection.

  “Neil Simon play,” Zach says. “Our senior year, your junior.” He grins. “I played Dylan,” he yells.

  Then it starts to come back to me. “The two divorced guys living together. One was a slob and the other OCPD.”

  “I thought it was OCD,” Joy says.

  “Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, is a fixation on tidiness, usually,” I answer.

  “I am not OCD or OCPD,” Dylan yells from the kitchen.

  My face heats. Shit, I didn’t mean to upset him.

  “Convince someone that doesn’t live with you,” Alex calls back with a laugh.

  “Okay, fine, I’m OCPD,” he says as he comes back into the dining room carrying a beer. “I just prefer order, which you usually find on this floor of the house, or the second.”

  “Not the rest?” I ask.

  “They,” he points to all the guys except Alex. “all have rooms above me and I hope whatever might be living or growing up there doesn’t find its way down the stairs.

  Alex finishes bandaging up Joy’s tattoo and takes his kit into the kitchen.

  “At least Alex cleans up after himself.”

  “Like I’m given a choice,” he mumbles and then winks at me.

  Joy pulls her shirt on and then looks at the guys. “Who am I sleeping with?”

  She is way more comfortable with these guys than I could ever be. Then again, after a few minutes into the tattooing I completely forgot she was just in her jeans and bra. But, I’m a girl. I doubt any of the guys forgot.

  “Come along, sweetheart,” Zach pulls himself from the couch. “I need to get my face washed, and moisturized, and turn in myself.”

  I stand and stretch. “Well, I guess I should be going so you guys can sleep.”

  Alex grabs me from inside the kitchen. I’m not sure how, but his arm is around my waist in a heartbeat. “We are not riding the subway at 3:00 in the morning.”

  “I can’t sleep here again.”

  “Yes you can and you will.” Then he grins at me. “We slept together before, and it worked out just fine.”

  I did like sleeping with him, but you can only sleep with a guy so much, especially if there is a relationship of some sorts, before he wants to do more than sleep. But, I did tell him I had no intention of having sex with him. I just hope I don’t have to remind him again.

  Besides, nobody wants to be on the subway at this hour, and I’ve never been comfortable calling a car. I don’t care how much these people are screened. There are still strange people picking you up and dropping you off. There’s got to be a few crazies driving around New York, and with my luck, I’d get one of them.

  “You’re staying?” It may be phrased in a question, but the tone was all but ordering.

  “I’ll stay,” I say as I roll my eyes.

  Kelsey has already changed into one of my t-shirts and is in bed by the time I get back upstairs to my room. Her sweater and leggings are folded on a chair and her lavender bra is on top. I remember that bra from doing her laundry, but I’d like to see it on her instead of always folded, waiting to be worn.

  She’s curled up on her side, a pillow bunched under her head. Is she asleep already?

  I know it’s late, or early, and I am bone tired, but I haven’t even kissed her yet. I was looking forward to the kissing part of our date. Though, kissing her in my bed when she’s only wearing a t-shirt, while braless, is probably a very bad idea. It’s not like she’ll let me do anything else and I’ll be left with a raging hard on and no relief, which means I’ll never get to sleep.

  As much as I hate it, for my own comfort, kissing can wait until tomorrow.

  I pull off my shirt and jeans and crawl into bed. I only wore the pajama bottoms when she was here before because I was sleeping on the couch and sometimes our living room can seem like Grand Central Station with friends in and out all hours of the day. I’m in my room and in my bed, and boxers are just fine. Though if Kelsey wasn’t here, I’d lose those too.

  I flip off the light by my bed and snuggle close to her back, but I’m not really touching her because I don’t want to wake her up. But I do want to be close to her. Just because she’s hands off for sex doesn’t mean she’s hands off for cuddling. And, I liked sleeping with her last week.

  “Good night, Alex,” she whispers.

  “I thought you were already asleep.”

  “Just trying to get there.”

  Since she is awake, technically, I move in closer and wrap my arm around her waist, spooning her. This is nice. Real nice.

  “I can feel your cock.”

  Which started getting hard the minute I stepped into the room and saw her curled up in my bed. “It’s always going to be there between us.” Until I get to put it in you, but I’m not saying that. She’ll run for the couch. Or send me there.

  “It’s not asleep, as we should be.”

  “It’s not like I have control.” Not that I’d do anything about it if I did.

  Kelsey sighs and rolls onto her back. “Is this going to be a problem with us?”

  “My cock?”

  “Yes!” she grinds out.

  It’s only going to be a problem for me, which is becoming clearer by the moment. “It’s going to get hard when you’re around, Kelsey. I’m not going to pretend it doesn’t.”

  “Are you going to be one of them?” she asks with disgust.

  “Them?”

  “I dated a few guys freshman year who were told early on that I’m celibate. They thought with enough time and coaxing I’d give it up for them, and when they realized I wouldn’t, whatever relationship there was went south fast until I just stopped going out.


  “I get it. I really do, but I’m not a robot either.”

  “Because, I really like spending time with you, Alex, but if your cock is always going to be there, alert and at the ready, waiting for me to give in, it’s not going to happen, and we might as well stop whatever it is we are doing now.”

  Honestly, I had kind of hoped that as we got closer, things would change. It is the natural progression of boy and girl in bed. “I would never push my wants on you. But, I’m not going to pretend that my dick isn’t responding to the stimulation of you just walking in a room.”

  “Okay.” She rolls back over.

  I spoon her again. “You really like spending time with me?” Just hearing her say it made my night. I mean, we are getting along, I want her, badly, but it’s more than that.

  “Yes. Now go to sleep.”

  Her neck is exposed and I kiss it quickly. “I like spending time with you too.”

  Kelsey doesn’t say anything else, and I take the silence of her wanting to sleep, which we should, but I can’t. Not with my cock wedged between me and her perfect ass.

  Slowly her breathing gets deeper and her body relaxes more and my body starts to give up on the hope of any intimacy tonight. I’m just about to drop off when she starts mumbling in her sleep.

  Kelsey is a sleep talker?

  I open my eyes. Not that it helps me hear any better in the darkness, but I want to figure out what she’s saying. Then I hear one name on a sigh. “Brandon.”

  Last night was almost perfect. Spending time with Alex, enjoying the guys and Joy, and then sleeping in Alex’s arms. The only drawback was his hard cock. Not that it’s a bad thing, but I don’t need that type of temptation in my life.

  Other guys have tried to get me in bed, but I didn’t like them well enough to take the chance. And, I don’t want to risk another pregnancy. Everything I explained to Alex is true. But, that doesn’t mean he hasn’t reawakened something inside of me I thought died with Brandon.

  Our lives may have been shit, but we had each other. The first love of my life and when we were together, anything was possible. When I was in bed with him, whether we were having sex or just sleeping, I felt the safest.

 

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