“Hey, lard-ass!” Larissa had spotted Jason. He was taking a Jell-O shot with a pretty, doe-eyed freshman by the Sub-Zero fridge. Sure enough, he was wearing a mesh tank top and basketball shorts. The freshman was squeezing Jason’s bicep.
“Don’t even bother,” Larissa drawled to the girl. “He has a tiny dick!”
Jason flipped Larissa the finger as nearby partygoers snickered. We continued into the living room. I surveyed the mostly upperclassmen crowd. Everyone looked more grown-up than me. Or at least what I thought I looked like. I’d hoped my makeup and Larissa-approved outfit aged me up a little so I didn’t look so fifteen.
Isaac and I had never been invited to parties. Not the cool ones, at least. We’d made fun of how superficial they probably were, but now that I was here and having fun in the electric buzz of the crowd, I really liked it. I felt energized by being part of a group.
“Jules!” I heard a familiar voice call. It was Sebastian, standing with Zeke. He waved us over.
Sebastian was wearing his contacts instead of glasses and had a T-shirt with a picture of James Dean on it.
“Rebel Without a Cause,” I noted as we approached.
“Big fan,” he returned.
“It’s a great one. Although East of Eden is my favorite.”
“Me too!” Sebastian grinned. I couldn’t help smiling back.
“You ladies look stunning,” Zeke piped in. He was wearing that backward paperboy hat again, which I wanted to reach for and turn right-side around, or just take the damn thing off.
“That’s a nice necklace,” Sebastian said admiringly to Mae.
“Thanks,” she returned. “It’s Jules’s.” I took it as a compliment that Sebastian liked my jewelry, even though Mae was wearing it.
“You guys enjoying your weekend?” Zeke small-talked.
“We went to a field hockey game last night,” Mae offered. Dad had dragged us to one of Helen’s games.
“My sister’s,” I explained to Sebastian.
I realized I was smiling way more than the situation called for. Keep it cool, Jules.
“What about you, Sebastian? What have you been up to this weekend?” I asked with effortful casualness.
“Good weekend so far—went running with my dad, edited a few articles, caught up with a friend from Philly. How’s it going with ‘People You Don’t Know’? When can I see the portraits?” he wondered, ticking his eyes to Mae.
“We haven’t done them yet,” I admitted. I’d intended to take Mae’s picture, I just kept putting it off.
“Oh,” he said, surprised.
“I’ll take them soon,” I assured him.
Mae glanced at Sebastian, then looked away. It seemed like she didn’t want to take them just as much as I didn’t.
“Jason is dead to me!” Larissa declared, arriving and disrupting our social square. “He totally came up behind me and tried to pour a vodka shot into my mouth.”
“Another vodka shot,” clarified Jessie Herrera, arriving in Larissa’s wake. Jessie was wearing her signature halter top, which conveniently showed off her rather large boobs.
“I don’t even think he was aiming for your mouth,” added Christine Symkowitz, applying lip gloss, which she was addicted to.
“Whatever, he got vodka all over me.” Larissa extended her chest toward us as evidence.
“Want me to beat him up?” Zeke offered, clearly joking. I didn’t think he could beat up a paper bag. He was no match for gym-rat Jason.
“Yeah, punch him in the face and I’ll Snapchat his big black eye,” Larissa aimed at Zeke, her words running together.
Larissa surveyed the room. “This party is so over. We should blow this joint.”
“You already have,” joked Christine, at which Jessie snickered. Larissa let it fly and waved them off.
“I have an idea! Why don’t we do a photo shoot?” Sebastian pitched.
My stomach did a flip turn. “Tonight?” I balked.
“What photo shoot?” Jessie asked. “Someone should take my picture, I look super cute tonight.”
Christine rolled her eyes. “You already posted eight selfies.”
“Of Mae—for the Regal,” Sebastian explained. “Jules is writing an article about her.”
“Yasssss!” Larissa exclaimed. “You look sooooo pretty, Mae. Your hair is, like, extra shiny. Why isn’t mine that shiny?” she mused. “I tried that castor oil and everything.”
“I don’t think that’s a great idea.” I glanced at Mae, trying to figure out what she thought about it. I didn’t want to put her on the spot. I also didn’t want be on the spot. The idea of people watching me take pictures made me nervous. Photography was a private thing for me.
“Do you have your camera?” Sebastian wondered.
“I’ve been using my phone,” I explained. “My old Nikon broke, and I’m holding out for the Canon 5D Mark III for Christmas.”
Sebastian seemed disappointed, so I tried to counter. “Plus I usually don’t usually take my camera to house parties.”
“Let’s do it,” Mae jumped in. I turned to her, surprised. Mae didn’t seem to like attention on her, but maybe the two sips of beer she’d drunk had given her some liquid courage.
“Awesome!” Sebastian beamed.
“Travis and some people are going to the cemetery,” Jessie informed us. “Apparently the town’s digging up tombstones to move them and someone said you can see the coffins.”
“Ew,” Larissa exclaimed. “Wait, Travis is going?”
Jessie nodded.
“The cemetery would be a cool setting for a photo shoot,” Sebastian mused.
“We’re going,” Larissa pronounced.
She grabbed Mae’s hand and led her toward the door, followed by Jessie and Christine. Mae glanced back at me. We both shrugged. Guess we were going to take her portrait at the cemetery, then.
“Shall we?” Sebastian said, offering his arm.
I looked down at it—even though the last thing I wanted to do was go to a graveyard and take Mae’s photo right now, I couldn’t turn down hanging out with Sebastian.
I linked my arm in his.
“Don’t mind if I do,” I returned, as if I was Scarlett O’Hara in Gone with the Wind and he was the dashing Rhett Butler. I knew my face was betraying how happy I was as we walked out of the party arm in arm, but I didn’t care.
We piled into Larissa’s SUV and headed for the cemetery. Sebastian took the keys from Larissa, insisting he would drive. He was completely sober. Drinking gave him a headache, he’d explained, so he didn’t do it much.
Mae and I were squished into the way-back, which was fine because Larissa was talking so loud now she was practically shouting. Jessie and Christine were next to her to absorb the fallout. I reminded myself never to drink vodka shots, or any kind of shots for that matter.
I glanced down at Mae’s left palm, which was resting on her bony knee. She had a small, scarred dot in the middle of her hand. I noticed she had one on the other palm as well.
“What happened to your hand?” I asked quietly.
Mae quickly pulled her sleeves down over her palms.
“I fell,” she answered simply, then turned away from me and looked out the window.
On both hands? It was weird to have a scar in the exact same spot on both palms. But she clearly didn’t want to talk about it, so I didn’t push it.
When we arrived at the cemetery, we filed out of the vehicle. Travis was already there, surrounded by his group of jock friends.
Larissa headed over to him and began shamelessly flirting. The boys had a bottle of tequila. I saw Jessie take a big swig, then pass it to Christine.
“Lighting looks good over there, Jules.” Sebastian pointed out a large mausoleum, where the full moon reflected off the limestone.
He started to follow me and Mae over. I realized him looking over my shoulder would definitely make me jumpy and I would never get the shot.
“I got it,” I assured him.
“We’ll catch back up with you in a few.”
Mae and I continued across the damp grass to the mausoleum. As we wove our way up a small incline through the gravestones, I avoided looking at the engravings. It always creeped me out that the names of people were displayed feet above where their dead bodies lay decomposing.
I wondered if Mae had lost anyone close to her.
“Do you do this often?” Mae asked as we arrived at the stone structure.
“Do photo shoots and hang out in cemeteries? Never. And I don’t really even go to parties,” I admitted.
A peal of laughter drifted over from where the group was down the hill. I glanced over my shoulder and saw Larissa sitting on a headstone, her legs wrapped around Travis.
“It’s fun, though,” Mae said. “I like being with people.”
“Me too,” I agreed. “Fun being part of a group.”
“A good group,” she clarified. “It’s really different than how I grew up, but I like it here.”
“You are super brave—being adventurous and trying new things.” It was a compliment to Mae, but also something I had been thinking lately about myself—challenging myself to be more confident and open at school, with all the new attention.
“Yeah, exactly.” Mae nodded, taking that in. “I’m being super brave.”
We had arrived at the mausoleum, and Mae smiled at me.
It seemed to go on forever.
Moving on, I pulled out my phone and inspected the best angle for lighting. This was the first column, so I wanted to get the picture right. I suddenly became mad at myself for waiting so long to take Mae’s portrait. Night wasn’t the easiest time to photograph, especially on a camera phone. If you used the flash it got all washed out, so I wanted to try to get enough light without it. Luckily the moon was full.
“Why don’t you stand here,” I suggested, gesturing to where the moonlight was brightest.
Mae stepped over to the spot, then looked at me without smiling. She seemed like a person in one of those old-timey portraits where they all looked like someone had just died.
I had to get her to loosen up.
“Why don’t you try—shaking out your hair.”
“My hair?”
“Yeah, just shake your head a little.”
She did, awkwardly.
“And your arms,” I added. “Just swing them around a little bit, try to loosen up your body.” It was a technique I’d seen a photographer use on a model on some cheesy reality show, but it worked.
Now both a little more relaxed, I got ready to shoot. Looking at my screen, Mae’s face nearly glowed in the moonlight.
“Tilt your chin down?”
She did. I snapped a shot and looked at down at it. Without even trying, Mae looked modelesque—like a filter had removed any imperfections from her face, even though I hadn’t used one.
I continued snapping photos as we tried a few different poses. “Put your hand on your hip? Yeah, that’s great. Now lean back a little?”
Mae shifted back toward the stone but immediately recoiled. I’d forgotten about the injury on her back. It had been a few weeks, so I thought it was healing, but maybe her scars still hurt.
“I’m sorry,” I apologized quickly.
“It’s okay,” she assured me, brushing it off with a sharp breath. She then turned her body sideways in another pose. She smiled for the camera.
“You’re a natural,” I complimented her.
I snapped a few more pictures.
“You looked happy,” Mae said.
“What do you mean?”
“When he was talking to you. Sebastian.”
I stopped, checking the last few shots on my phone. I hoped Mae hadn’t noticed my crush on Sebastian, but no luck, since her mind seemed to soak up every detail available.
“He looked happy too,” Mae added. “Talking to you.”
“He did?” I asked too quickly.
Mae nodded. “You like him,” she said.
Was she teasing me? Or just asking? I couldn’t quite tell.
“I—whatever. I mean, he’s nice,” I backpedaled. I don’t know why, but I was embarrassed admitting my crush to her. Why was I turning this into a big deal? It wasn’t a crime to like someone.
I changed the subject. “The moonlight highlights your cheekbones.”
Mae looked up at the moon for a long moment. She didn’t answer. She grew quiet, solemn, staring at the moon.
“Let’s just do a few more and we’ll be done,” I told her.
She turned back to me and I clicked a few more shots. She looked practically perfect in every frame; I knew we’d have plenty to choose from. I clicked back to the camera.
Suddenly, through my screen, Mae’s head whipped around.
“What was that?” She was now staring at the edge of the woods, looking like a deer that had picked up the scent of a predator.
I looked over at the placid trees. “I didn’t hear anything.”
Mae continued to stare past the row of gravestones to the trees.
“Maybe it was the wind,” I guessed, trying to brush off her concern.
Mae turned back to me. I could tell she didn’t think it was the wind. “Sorry, I get nervous around the full moon,” she explained.
“Why, are you a werewolf or something?” I joked.
“No,” she answered without irony. “Full moons were kind of a big deal where I came from.”
“How so?”
“They just … It’s special. Like a holiday.”
“That’s cool,” I said. I lifted my phone and took a few more pictures. Through my viewer, I saw her turn her attention back toward the moon, as if she were magnetized by it. Her pale skin glowed.
I clicked a few shots, wanting to capture the bright glow on her cheeks.
Then, through my screen, I saw Mae’s lips start moving. I couldn’t tell what she was saying.
“I reign over thee, sayeth the Lord of the Earth—” she mumbled.
I lowered my phone and watched as she continued, a little louder.
“—In the power exalted above and below, in whose hands the sun is a glittering sword and the moon a through-thrusting fire—”
She seemed like she was kind of in a trance, reciting this—poem or something, staring at the moon.
“Mae?” I ventured.
But she made no indication she had even heard me.
“—Who measureth your garments in the midst of my vestures, and trusseth you up as the palms of my hand and brighten your vestment with Infernal light,” her voice continued, getting louder and louder.
What the hell was she talking about?
Then she started shaking. I stepped toward her, not sure what to do. Her whole body was convulsing, as if she was having a seizure or something. Panic ran through my body. I didn’t want anything bad happening to her, especially on my watch.
“Mae!” I called to her, trying to get her to snap out of it. Her arms were flailing so hard now I couldn’t reach her even if I tried. Her voice rose.
“Can the wings of the wings hear your voices of wonder?”
Holy crap, this was weird. What in the world was she talking about?
“Help!” I yelled over to the group. Some drunken heads turned from their revelry. Sebastian sprinted toward us.
“—Whom I have prepared as cups for a wedding or as flowers regaling the chambers of lust!”
Mae was shaking uncontrollably now. Her body seemed to lose its ability to stay vertical. She was leaning against the mausoleum stone, slumping down it. I wondered if that hurt her back.
“Stronger are your feet than the barren stone. Mightier are your voices than the manifold winds!” She was almost yelling now.
“Epilepsy?” Sebastian asked, arriving on the scene. The others had followed him over.
“I don’t know,” I said, panicked. “She just started shaking.”
“For you are become as a building such as is not, save in the mind of the All-Powerful m
anifestation of Satan!”
Jessie reached for her phone to take a video, but Larissa’s arm stopped her—maybe Larissa actually cared about Mae.
Sebastian reached for her upper body to lift her off the ground.
“Sounds like Enochian Keys,” Zeke offered. “Want me to grab her legs?”
“Let’s just get her upright,” Sebastian suggested as the two boys reached between Mae’s flailing arms.
“Keys are like Bible verses, right?” Sebastian asked.
“More like incantations, I think,” Zeke said as they leaned Mae up against the mausoleum.
I had no idea what Enochian Keys were, but I did know they were creepy as shit.
Sebastian knelt down next to Mae. Her eyes were still fixated on the moon.
“Arise! Sayeth the First! Move therefore unto his servants! Show yourselves in power—”
“Mae,” Sebastian said gently.
He reached toward her and wrapped his arms around her thin body, scooping her into his arms. “Everything is all right,” he said calmly to her. “Everything is going to be all right.”
Mae finally tore her eyes from the moon and brought her gaze to the boy who was enveloping her.
“You’re okay,” he assured her. And somehow, at least for the moment, she believed him. Her shaking body grew still.
Mae stared up at Sebastian, lying limp in his arms. While I’d had my Gone with the Wind moment with him earlier, I couldn’t deny that Mae’s dark features and damsel-in-distress position made her look exactly like Scarlett O’Hara, staring up at her Rhett.
CHAPTER 19
SUZANNE DIDN’T BOTHER LEAVING A MESSAGE. This was the third time she’d called Detective Nelson, and it was the third time it had gone to voice mail.
Pocketing her phone, she climbed out of her car, grabbing her mug of morning tea. She entered the hospital building and strode down the hall of the trauma wing, glancing at a clock. She had an all-department meeting in a half hour and wanted to do some more research before it started, so she quickened her pace.
A first-year psychiatry resident averted his eyes as Suzanne passed. He’d probably heard about Suzanne taking Mae home. Suzanne knew the whole department was talking about it, but she kept her head held high.
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