“But can’t one of you provide? Why do all three of you need to?”
“I thought we explained that. If one of us mates, the other will want to go elsewhere to find a mate, once the pack has an alpha.”
“You wouldn’t want to stay?”
“It’s not a matter of wanting,” he says. “It’s a matter of options.”
“Oh.”
He finishes the last bite of his sandwich and leans back on his hands. Sweat is still beading at his hairline, and he grabs his collar and waves it to get more air. “It’s oddly hot, you mind if I take this off?” he asks, gesturing to his shirt.
I take another bite of sandwich and shake my head, and he crosses his arms and pulls his shirt off in one swift movement that bares his exquisite abs and cut pecs to my eyes. Wolf bodies translate so well to naked human ones. My goodness.
“You been working out?” I ask.
He scoffs. “As if.”
I shake my head. “It’s really unfair to human men that you can look like that with no effort.”
He shrugs. “I guess it’s just that only fairly beautiful humans ever bred into the shifter line. So that part of us has good genes.” He pulls out another sandwich when I’m nearly done with mine and hands it to me. “Gotta put some meat on those bones.”
I rub my hand across my midsection. “No thanks, I think I’m good.”
“Really?” he asks, coming closer. He looks into my eyes and draws a hand down my side, tickling me and making me inhale in surprise. “That sandwich was tiny. You’ve got to still be hungry.”
“That sandwich was huge, as you well know,” I say, laughing. “I’m full.”
“Alright,” he says, pulling me close and nuzzling my neck. “Time for an afternoon snack then?”
I allow him to nip the base of my neck and then kiss his way down to my shoulder. “Oh gosh, that feels good.”
“I’m glad,” he says. He digs a hand into my waist, into my soft love handles, but before I can feel self conscious or pull his hand away, he growls in satisfaction. “I swear, Aspen, you have the most amazing body.”
“What? I’m fat.”
He squeezes again, then moves his hand up my side to my ribcage. “You’re perfect.” He kisses the tops of my breasts, my neck. “Soft, curvaceous, lovely.”
“Maybe you should write romance,” I say, gasping as he plays with the hem of my shirt, as if he can’t decide whether to take it off.
“Nah,” he says. “Too difficult.”
What’s difficult is trying to think straight as he lays me back down on the blanket, eyes burning down into mine, hands pushing my shoulders into the soft grass. The determination in his eyes says he’s not going to stop this time. Do I want him to?
The answer is a resounding yes, from my human side at least.
“Lindon…”
“I would make you happy, Aspen.” He runs his hands down my arms to my wrists, then lifts them over my head and pins them in one smooth move before I know what he’s doing. Again, nerve-wracking but a little hot. He leans forward until we’re nose to nose. “Pick me, and I’ll never forget to woo you.”
I stare up at him, heart pounding. My eyes move to his perfect lips, the curve at the top of them, the slight dimple in his left cheek. My body is reacting to him, growing soft and pliant the longer he stays on top of me, pinning me with his strong hands and firm thighs.
But I just can’t forget Rafe. I can’t quite give up on him yet. I guess I said I wanted them to compete, but as much as the wolf in me just wants a mate, the rational part of me wants Rafe, and always has.
Lindon’s eyes narrow. “What are you thinking about?”
I frown and look away from his eyes, and his hands tighten on my wrists.
“Someone else?” he asks. “Rafe, maybe?” A flash of anger flits across his perfect features, and then he’s back to normal, but colder. “Of course, Rafe, the perfect alpha. The only one any alpha female could be considered for.”
“Lindon,” I say, feeling oddly uncomfortable, like I’m witnessing part of a grudge I’ve never seen before. Did he hate that Ava was always meant for Rafe, never for him? Lindon has always been the least likely to obey Rafe or go along with what he wanted, though I still thought they were friends.
“He doesn’t have to be alpha, you know,” Lindon says. “Just because his mom and dad were both alpha.”
“I know. But he’d make a good alpha.”
“And I wouldn’t?”
“Sure you would,” I say.
He narrows his eyes at me. “I don’t know if you even believe that.” He shifts my wrists to one of his hands so the other is free to run down the side of my neck and ear. “But I think you’ll find I’m more capable than anyone knows.”
I struggle lightly against his hold, not fully committed to escaping, but just to see how serious he is about holding me down. He’s firm, interesting. “This is a side I haven’t seen of you before,” I say, voice slightly husky from the brush of his fingers.
“Just because no one has seen it, doesn’t mean it’s not there. There’s a little alpha in all of us, after all…”
“I…”
“Even Hawthorne, right?” he says quietly, toying with my shirt again. This powerful, dominant side of him turns me on, but still doesn’t make him the one in my heart.
“What about him?”
“He got a taste of you the other night, didn’t he?”
I frown. “I don’t know, I mean, I went to his room and he…”
“I smelled him on you,” he says. “I’m glad you opened the challenge up to all of us. To be excluded again would be agonizing.”
I sigh. “I guess I just don’t get it.”
His mouth covers mine, hot and adept, and my thoughts go blank. I press my legs together, feel his thighs move against me. After I’m thoroughly kissed, long and slowly, he pulls back with a look of triumph on his face. “Do you get that?”
“A kiss?”
“No,” he says, moving in for another one. Capturing my mouth when I play coy and try to move aside. This time he slides me the tongue, and I let it play, pleasuring my mouth before I meet it with mine. This time, he’s not just kissing my mouth, he’s owning it, showing me a new side of him. And as his hand bears down on mine and his other hand grips the soft flesh of my side, kneading it, I know what he’s trying to say. He wants me.
I pull my mouth away. “Okay, I think I get it, but Lindon—”
He licks his lips, and I catch a glimpse of elongated canines. His eyes have that ethereal glow they get when his wolf is showing. The female in me responds to him, but my rational brain tells me to get the hell out if I don’t want to be trapped.
“Wait,” I say, as he comes back again, this time pulling my shirt up and shoving his hand up toward my bra. He takes my mouth again, stifling any protest, and I start to fight him for real, trying to get my wrists free, trying to show him I’m not just playing coy.
But he simply growls against my mouth, lost to his wolf and the need to dominate, as my body writhes under him in helpless pleasure that I don’t even want right now.
“Alright,” a deep voice says from behind us, interrupting the moment. “Lindon, I think you’re about to cross the line of consent.”
A low growl from Lindon, who pulls back reluctantly but continues to straddle me. “Oh fuck off, Rafe. No one wants you here.”
“Is that true?” Rafe asks, folding his arms and looking impossibly strong and handsome as he stares down at us. His dark hair glints blue in the sun and his dark brows and lashes just make his icy, intense azure eyes more striking. “No one wants me here?”
My heart does a little double thump. The more animal side of me wants him to fuck off. The more rational side is relieved that he’s here to intervene. “I…”
He reaches down and grabs Lindon by the neck and pulls him off. Lindon swats his hand and stands on his own, cursing. “See?” Rafe smirks at me as I try to regain my composure. “Thi
s is what I meant about not going off alone with any of them.”
I flush in embarrassment and summon up some righteous indignation. “Who said what was happening was a bad thing?”
His mood goes immediately from smirking to pissed, and he reaches down and hauls me to my feet with one smooth movement. Then hauls me over his shoulders.
“Put me down, asshole.”
“No,” he says, walking away.
“Put her down,” Lindon says, standing behind us.
Rafe takes a deep breath and smiles cruelly, then turns to face the other man imperiously. “Oh please, Lindon. Make me.”
Lindon frowns but shakes his head and my eyes widen as I realize Rafe has won without doing anything and now gets to carry me away.
Carry me away to do what?
Chapter 4
Once again I find myself slung over Rafe’s back, headed toward an unknown destination. I’m beginning to get used to this. I admit a part of me finds this a bit hot, his strong arms, long stride, the dominance emanating from him as he takes the path back to the house, silent and angry.
I’m surprised by his strength, by how easy it is to carry me without losing a beat. I’m short but I’m not exactly light.
“You followed us, didn’t you?” I ask. “After you saw us on the stairs.”
“Of course I did.”
“Hmph,” I say. “The least you could do is be ashamed of your stalkerish ways.”
“I’m not going to be ashamed of wanting to win. I’m not going to lose, Aspen. I think you knew that before you started this competition.”
“I knew no such thing,” I say stubbornly.
“Besides,” he says. “Aren’t you glad I did come? Lindon has some powerful methods of persuasion. You wouldn’t want the alpha games to be over that fast, would you?”
He says the words ‘alpha games’ in a sarcastic way that makes me think he doesn’t think much of them.
“I don’t know,” I say. “I guess I haven’t figured it out yet.”
He groans and shakes his head, but continues to walk toward the mansion. “Seriously, Aspen, you’ve had some dumb ideas, but this has got to be one of the best.”
“Best as in good, or best as in dumb?”
“What do you think?” he mutters.
“Can we switch me to piggyback?” I ask. “If you’re going to be all ‘rawr’ alpha, I should at least get to be comfortable.”
He sighs and lets me down and then steps in front of me and lets me climb on his back. “Fine.”
I jump on and he hooks arms under my legs and starts walking again. Rafe is half big bad alpha, half considerate, caring protector. I like being carried by him though. Always have.
If only he could be mine for reasons other than the pack. But I know I’ll never be able to quite believe that someone as amazing as him could want someone as average as me without some kind of outside inducement. I know it’s my own insecurity, but I can’t help thinking that I think the world of him, and I’m just that weak little she-wolf to him. That flimsy, flagrant excuse for a pack member that left to see the world rather than staying with her responsibilities.
And I did see the world. But I also missed him, every day.
My arms are wrapped around his neck and I nuzzle into his hair, still enjoying the sunlight of the day, and still trying to cool off after the Lindon incident.
“I should have gone after him,” Rafe says. “He was totally out of line.”
“Maybe.” I watch his dark hair bounce in the sunlight, glinting with little flecks of blue, such a deep, deep black. When he ages, will it be a beautiful salt and pepper like his dad’s? “It’s my fault, I was encouraging him.”
“I thought you weren’t ready to take a mate.”
“Part of me isn’t, the other part, the more animal side of me, is screaming for one.”
“You know, Aspen, there was a totally logical way to solve this whole thing without making us all compete…”
“Aw, but making you all compete is fun. Look, I know what you’re saying. You’re saying I should have just picked you. We all grew up expecting you to be the Alpha. I get that. But Lindon and Hawthorne have grown up to be amazing men in their own right, and they deserve a shot as well.”
“They were only half alpha,” he mutters.
“They are good guys.”
He shrugs and I bounce lightly on his back. He seems to almost have forgotten I was even up here. “You know, if I had only wanted you to make myself Alpha, I could have just pressured you into staying before. Said whatever you wanted, done whatever it took.”
“Why didn’t you?”
He sighs as we approach the house. “Because, Aspen, it’s not like that between us. You wanted to go and I wanted you to have what you want. I’d never tie you down against your will, even for the pack.”
“Tie me down?” That sounds interesting.
He coughs. “You know, hold you back.”
“I see.”
“Look, I’ve been thinking about it. It was a lot of pressure on you, to mate for the pack, to choose me. If you really don’t want me, if you don’t think we’d work together, tell me now.” He sets me down on my feet and faces me with hands on his lean hips, his large torso and wide, muscular shoulders cast a shadow on me while his blue eyes catch the sun and are blazingly bright.
He’s stunning. I want to lick him. Did he ask me a question? Oh my gosh, what’s going on with me lately? I put a hand over my face and when I look up, his brow is crumpled in confusion.
“Is it that bad to even think about it?” He takes a step closer. “I think I have a lot to offer as alpha. Not only was I extremely close to the one always doing the job, but I’ve prepared for it my whole life. I can give you everything, Aspen.”
Everything but love, I think.
“What would you have said to make me stay? What did you think I want?”
“I don’t know.”
“Then how would you have stopped me?”
“I guess I just would have said anything I could until you said yes. But I could see it in your eyes. You were going to leave, and the only way to make you stay would be to make you miserable.”
I shrug. “Well, I’m back now. We have another chance. Lindon made his move. It was a delicious afternoon.” Rafe narrows his eyes, blue flashes from under his lashes, but I laugh and correct him. “The picnic, I mean.”
He lets out a deep breath. “Oh.”
I eye him. “The kissing wasn’t bad either.”
He wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me in tight. “I can do better.”
I flick my gaze up to him, looking up through long lashes. “Can you?”
“Yes.” He cups the back of my head in his hands, and warmth floods me as he lowers his head. But I pull back, with the greatest of effort, and the wolf in screams in frustration.
“You haven’t wooed me. You don’t get to just use Lindon’s picnic.”
“I was reading up on wooing. It seems to be an old fashioned term.”
“Yes, but it refers to the same things.”
“I bought flowers and chocolates. On the internet. They should be coming tomorrow. The chocolates are free two day shipping.” He looks proud of himself and flashes a fang at me and I frown.
“Romantic…”
He looks less proud now and pulls me against him again. “Look, I’m not great at this human stuff. The mushy stuff. But I’d do well for you. I’d make you happy. He runs a hand along the side of my cheek, and my body heats up again. I watch him breathe in my fragrance like a man finding water in the desert, and for a moment, I’m tempted to just go with him. Just let him claim me and spend the rest of myself just hoping it’s all enough. But I can’t.
“Look, Rafe, you have a lot to offer. I just don’t know if it’s the right offer for me. There have to be other alpha females around.”
He blinks. “But why should I look, when there’s one right here?”
“They might be stron
ger, less squishy.”
“I like that you’re squishy.” He gives my side a squeeze, and I bat his hand away.
“Why do you guys keep doing that?”
He shrugs. “Men like curves, softness. The wolf in me wants to just eat you up.”
I grimace.
“Not literally, obviously,” he says.
“Good.” I push away from him and he lets me go, though it would take very little energy at all to keep me there. “I’m going back to the house for a nap, maybe some homework.”
“Aspen, you know you want me.”
I flip around, let my auburn hair out of my ponytail so it can breathe, and drink in the sunlight and fresh air for a moment. Let the arrogance of his statement slide off my back and any anger with it. I meet his eyes, and a flare of tension flies between us. “Wanting you isn’t enough. Wanting doesn’t last a lifetime.”
He shoves his hands in his pockets. “Sometimes it does.”
Something catches my eyes from the side of the house, a flash of golden white running through the trees. Lindon is back at the house.
“Thanks for coming, Rafe. But you don’t need to interfere.”
“He was going to push it,” Rafe replies. “He couldn’t help it.”
“Then I would have transformed. If I wanted to fight him.”
“You shouldn’t have to fight him,” he says.
“Yes, but didn’t you say they can’t resist my scent? Even if they aren’t bad wolves?”
“Yes, but they should listen to their humans. Of the three of us, I’m the only one who hasn’t lost control with you.”
My eyes flash. “Haven’t you?” I think of the other night in his room. That was hot. I would do it again, if I was sure there wouldn’t be emotional implications.
“I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret for the rest of your life.”
“It’s not your decision. But what do you mean?”
“Obviously it’s important to you not to take the decision to mate lightly. I don’t want to see you caught up in a moment, seduced by a too eager wolf who’s forgetting the rules, who makes you feel too good to remember what you’re doing, and end up regretting it for the rest of your life.”
Ultimate Alpha Boxed Set: A BBW and Wolf Shifter collection Page 8