by Sue Lyndon
Madame Jewel laughed. “I own a brothel, sweetie. Those aren’t the first tits I’ve seen.”
“I-I’m fine. What conversation are you talking about? What did Lawrence say to you?”
“He said he planned to return early this evening to visit you again. He said to make sure you were ready for him and didn’t take any other customers first.” Madame Jewel smiled. “You must have made quite an impression on the man. He offered to pay fifty dollars for another night with you.”
Callie sighed. “Well, he did sort of ask me to marry him.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yes, but I said no.”
“Would you like Gabriel to toss him out if he shows his face around here again? Fifty dollars or not, you don’t have to see him if you don’t wish to.” Madame Jewel gave her a sympathetic look.
Callie didn’t know what to say. Her pride urged her to refuse another night with Lawrence. But another fifty dollars put her much closer to affording her trip back home. Guilt fell on her shoulders in the next moment, and she found it difficult to breathe. She hated that she was thinking about the money. What was wrong with her?
“Amber? Callie, dear?”
“I’ll see him again. I-I want to see him again. Even though I don’t.” She laughed. “Does that sound confusing or what?”
“Do you have feelings for the gentleman?”
Callie bit her lip. “I’m not sure. I suppose I do, but I can’t stay here in Culpepper forever, and I can’t ask him to leave either. A lot of people in town want him to become the preacher here. He couldn’t do that if he married me. Ruination is contagious, right?”
Madame Jewel gave her shoulder a squeeze and moved to the door. “The mayor married a gem. So did the sheriff. Surely, you must have heard?”
“Well, yes, I know about that. But a preacher… could you imagine?”
Madame Jewel’s face lit up as she stared at Callie. “I could imagine it very well, but only if it would make you happy. I know it’s difficult, but try not to care what others think of you. Make the choices that will bring joy to your life, whether it’s marrying this Lawrence fellow or traveling home to make amends with your family.” She slipped out the door and closed it behind her, leaving Callie to her thoughts.
*
Lawrence stayed in town for longer than he’d originally intended. Peter probably thought he’d run into trouble. But if he returned home, Callie’s evenings would be open to another man. He wouldn’t take that chance.
Jealousy burned through him at the thought of another man lusting after her, let alone touching her, or making love to her. As a result, Lawrence visited her every night, staying until dawn sometimes. He enjoyed her company, and especially enjoyed when she disobeyed one of his commands in bed and he had to punish her. She always obediently draped herself over his lap to accept her spanking, and by the time he finished chastising her she would be soaking wet and ready to be claimed.
He still wanted to make her his wife. But each time he proposed, she vehemently refused. He was at a loss. She seemed as convinced as the townspeople that he would eventually become the town preacher, and she refused to prevent him from answering his calling. Other times, she would mention Virginia and the sister with whom she thought she would live. Her stubbornness frustrated him, but he could be just as stubborn.
He would stay in town until she accepted him as her husband. David Cray had mentioned that the circuit judge would be passing through late next week to perform several marriage ceremonies. Lawrence hoped and prayed—yes, he was praying again for the first time in a long time—for Callie’s heart to open to him.
Word had spread that Lawrence was spellbound by the newest gem. Everywhere he went, men teased him that he would soon spend his entire fortune at The Red Petticoat. Some who teased him also expressed frustration that they hadn’t been able to spend an evening with Amber yet. On several occasions, he’d had to clench his jaw and keep walking, lest he end up in a fist fight. He’d never been prone to violence, but his desire to possess Callie drove him past all reason.
A savage need for her burned within him, growing stronger by the day. He couldn’t leave Culpepper and return to his mountain cabin. Not now. Not when the entire town was apparently watching and waiting for him to leave so Callie would be available for new customers.
He tried to ignore the worry that she would persist in her refusal to marry him, but he feared losing her for good. What would happen when she finally had enough money saved to return home? Would she leave town without telling him?
The thought of never seeing Callie again made his throat constrict and his chest ache.
“Lawrence, we need to talk,” David Cray said one morning as they worked on a fence together. “It’s about what folks are sayin’.”
Lawrence wiped the sweat from his brow and looked up from the board he was pounding a nail into. “I don’t care what folks are saying.”
“It’s said you visit The Red Petticoat every night. Now, I’m not one to judge, but you need to think about the example you’re setting for the other men in this town. You might not be a preacher anymore, but everyone knows you once were, and there are those who think you ought to start holding Sunday services, including me.”
“It’s not as if I’m spending every night with a different girl, David. If you’ve heard I’m visiting the saloon every evening, then surely you’ve heard I’m seeing the same girl each night, too?”
“Lawrence, if the other men in this town—married men, mind you—see a preacher spending his free time in a brothel, what sort of example does that set? Before you know it, all the married men in Culpepper will be breaking their wedding vows.”
“You’d be surprised how many married men show up at The Red Petticoat every night.” Lawrence finished pounding the nail in the board and grabbed another one. He hadn’t thought about the precedent he was setting for the other men in town. But he’d never asked anyone to look up to him. If he could go back in time and not get drunk on whiskey and spill his secrets at the bar, he would do it in a heartbeat. Then he could just be a regular man in Culpepper and do as he pleased without the whole town watching and judging.
“Lawrence, I’m asking you as a friend to reconsider your actions. I’m worried about you. You’re headed down a path of sin from which you may never return.”
Lawrence tossed the hammer into the grass and faced David. “I want to make her my wife. The gem I’ve been visiting.”
“It’s Amber, isn’t it? The girl you’re infatuated with? Let me tell you something, Lawrence, that girl is no good. She’s trouble. She already tried to lead Thom Gerrard down a path of sin. Have you heard…”
Rage pumped through Lawrence’s veins. He took a deep breath, attempting to calm himself before he hauled off and decked his friend. “That’s nothing but gossip. Cal-Amber, Amber didn’t try to seduce anyone. Mrs. Gerrard caught her husband harassing the poor girl and kicked her out in the middle of the night, right onto the street. Where else was the girl supposed to go?”
“If the town had a preacher, she could have gone to him for council and perhaps found refuge in another family’s home. But now, now she has become a soiled dove. There ain’t no coming back from that. She’s bad for you, Lawrence, and she’s taking you farther away from where you ought to be.” David pointed toward the church steeple that towered over the other buildings in town. “That’s where you ought to be. Not at The Red Petticoat. God led you here because you’re needed, and you’ll wake up and realize that sooner or later. Sooner, I hope.”
“I’ve asked her to marry me.”
David’s eyes grew wide and he shook his head. “You can’t marry a soiled dove.”
“She’s only been with me. I visit her every night. No other man has had a chance yet, and by God I’ll not allow any other man to go upstairs with her, even if I have to stay in town for another year until she agrees to become my wife.”
“Just listen to yourself. What would your wife thin
k?”
Lawrence’s hands curled into fists, and David must have noticed the anger radiating from him because he backed up a few steps. “Mary is gone. Gone! It doesn’t matter what she would think.”
But David had placed a seed of doubt in Lawrence’s mind. More than one seed, in fact. He kept telling himself it didn’t matter what Mary or anyone else thought of his actions, but when he pictured Mary’s beautiful face in his mind and saw her blue eyes clear as day, doubt after doubt swept through him. Mary would have wanted him to became the preacher in this town. She would have wanted him to end his grieving and faithfully answer his calling to God.
“You’ll have to check on your homestead eventually, Lawrence, and when you do Amber will lay with other men. I guarantee it.”
Lawrence straightened and eyed the afternoon sun. At this time of day, he was usually getting cleaned up and preparing for another night at the saloon. A gasp, or perhaps it was a brief cry, sounded behind him. But when he turned around, he saw no one.
Well, if he were hearing things, he was clearly losing his mind. Maybe he shouldn’t visit Callie tonight. Maybe it was time to return to his cabin and sort his thoughts out.
The worst doubt of all came from David’s point about Culpepper not having a preacher. If there had been a preacher in Culpepper overseeing the spiritual welfare of the town, perhaps Callie would have sought help from the church before she turned to The Red Petticoat.
During his time in Culpepper, Lawrence had gotten to know the townspeople better. The growing families as well as the single miners. The town was growing and he couldn’t deny that he recognized a need for a pastor.
He got back to work, holding a board in place while David hammered a nail into it, with neither man mentioning the punch that had almost been thrown.
Once the fence was finished about an hour later, Lawrence returned to his room at the Bentley Inn. For the first time all week, he was unsure of where he would be spending his evening.
Chapter Six
He wasn’t coming. Not tonight. Maybe not ever again. Callie tried to hide her disappointment as she moved about the main room of the saloon, serving drinks and chatting with customers. Lawrence usually visited The Red Petticoat just after darkness fell. Tonight would have been their sixth night in a row together.
How stupid she’d been to fall for him. Yet she had continually pushed him away. Each time he had proposed marriage, she had said no. She blinked back tears and hurried into the kitchen.
“What’s wrong, child?” Nettie asked from the stove.
Callie was grateful to find no one else around. She let a few tears fall, brushed them away, and sniffled. Nettie wiped her hands on her apron, approached Callie, and wrapped an arm around her.
“There, there. Now who was mean to you? Point the scoundrel out and I’ll put a concoction of spices in his supper so fierce it’ll set him on his back for days.”
“Oh, nothing happened out there.” She gave a desolate sigh. “It’s what isn’t going to happen tonight that has me so upset. I feel like a fool.”
Nettie urged her to sit down at the little table against the wall. She took Callie’s hand and gave it a squeeze, her pretty blue eyes shining with sympathy. “The pastor has you upset, has he?”
Callie nodded. “I might have eavesdropped on a conversation he had with one of his friends today. About me, and about possibly becoming the preacher in Culpepper. Lawrence’s friend seemed to think I was leading him astray and keeping him from answering his calling. Maybe he’s right. This town could use a preacher. And now it doesn’t appear that Lawrence is planning on meeting me tonight. He hasn’t shown yet.”
“Oh, child. Maybe the man got held up somewhere.”
“He probably went back to his cabin. He probably came to his senses and decided not to see me anymore. I’ve been so stupid.”
“Why don’t you go on up to your room? Get some rest and perhaps in the morning you can find your preacher and talk things through.”
“No. I should be working. The more I work, the sooner I’ll make it back home.” Callie stood up and moved to the door in the direction of the chatter and piano music. “Have a good night, Nettie.”
Out in the main room, Callie let her gaze wander around until an older man caught her eye and winked at her. Well, this is it. She sashayed over to him with a smile. After he patted his knee, she sat on his lap and ran a hand over his chest. A move she’d seen other gems do many times.
“I’ve had my eye on you all week, little girl.”
She batted her eyelashes at him, copying a flirtatious look she’d seen Opal giving the customers. Though Callie didn’t recognize the man, she said, “Sugar pie, I’ve had my eye on you all week too.”
He chuckled and squeezed her thigh, right above her stockings. “What do you say we finish this conversation upstairs, Miss Amber?”
Well, if he knew her name, he must be a regular customer she just hadn’t taken notice of yet. That gave her a little comfort. Madame Jewel and Gabriel didn’t allow known troublemakers into The Red Petticoat. Though this man didn’t appeal to her at all, he would be a good and safe place to start moving on from her time with Lawrence.
But in the next moment, the man’s face went pale and he jerked his hand away from her thigh. Before Callie could ask what was wrong, she found herself pulled off the customer’s lap.
Dark, furious eyes stared down at her. She gasped as Lawrence held her out by her forearms, his nostrils flaring and his face red.
“I told you I’d be here tonight, didn’t I?”
She glared at him. “A bit late, aren’t you? I honestly didn’t think you were coming.”
“We need to talk. Upstairs.” He guided her toward the steps, only for Gabriel’s huge form to block their path.
“It’s all right, Gabriel. We just need a quiet place to talk.”
Gabriel’s eyebrows drew together and his jaw clenched. He glared at Lawrence for a few seconds before moving out of the way. Callie broke away from Lawrence and headed up the steps. Anger churned through her insides. How dare he barge in here, hours late, and then act jealous when he found her doing her job?
She stormed into her room and spun around, waiting for him to enter. He came inside and closed the door, his entire body tensed. She reminded herself of the town’s need for a pastor. She needed to drive him away once and for all. Biting her lip to hold back tears that rose from the prospect of never seeing him again, she stared at him angrily, not trusting herself to speak just yet.
When she finally had her emotions under control, she said, “You just cost me a customer.” Her tone came out harsh and bitter.
His eyes flashed and he was on her in the next moment, forcing her to bend over the bed. He lifted her skirts and petticoats up, then had her drawers down around her ankles soon after. She gasped and tried to push off the bed, but he kept a firm hand on her lower back, forcing her to remain bent over. She heard the jingling of his belt buckle and tensed, expecting him to thrust himself into her.
Swoosh! She heard the swinging belt only a split second before the sting seared across her buttocks. She flinched as fresh tears burned in her eyes. He struck her, over and over again, bringing the leather down across her cheeks, which were still tender from the spanking he’d given her last night. Except last night he hadn’t been angry. Last night he’d spanked her for touching herself without permission, but it had mostly been bedroom play.
This felt like a real punishment, though she wasn’t sure what she’d done to deserve it. Except be a whore.
She cried into the covers and ceased her struggles. His strength surpassed hers and he kept her pressed down on the bed as he brought the belt down, landing several harsh strokes over the tops of her thighs. Her entire bottom felt ablaze.
Shame filled her. This is what she’d become. All because of her stupid pride. All because she hadn’t wanted to ask her family for help. All because she’d wanted to prove that eloping and traveling out west hadn’t b
een a mistake. She sobbed and sobbed until she had no more tears left to shed.
At some point, Lawrence had stopped whipping her. He sat on the bed next to her, rubbing her back. After her sobs quieted, he stroked the tear-dampened hair out of her face.
“I am so sorry, Callie.”
She peered up at him to find him positively stricken, as if he regretted what he’d just done. She sniffled. “Don’t be sorry. I deserved it.”
“No. You didn’t. I was angry. I saw you sitting on that man’s lap, and I wanted to strangle the life out of him right in the middle of the saloon.” He released a shuddering breath and fixed her drawers back in place, then smoothed her petticoats and skirts down.
With his help, she sat up next to him, and he wrapped his arms around her and continued stroking her hair.
“I came to see you today, Lawrence, when you were building the fence. I heard everything Mr. Cray said, and it makes sense. You should stop coming here. You shouldn’t see me anymore. Even if you don’t take up preaching again, you shouldn’t be seen here.”
“Callie, I would marry you tomorrow if you agreed, and walk through town next to you with my head held high.” He brushed at her fallen tears, wiping them away with his thumbs.
“Why were you late, Lawrence?”
He swallowed hard. “I had to track the bank manager down after the bank closed before I could get there. Then I had him transfer two thousand dollars into your account.”
“What? I can’t accept that, Lawrence. I can’t.”
“Please hear me out, Callie.”
Shock filled her. That was enough money to comfortably reach Virginia, with plenty left over. She could stick to her story about Matthew dying after his claim produced a fair amount of gold. Enough money for her to prove to her family that she wasn’t young and foolish. Though she berated herself for still seeking their approval, she thought maybe her parents would forgive her and welcome her back home. Maybe she could pretend the last year of her life hadn’t happened.
“Callie, I should have never slept with you without us being properly wed. The night I won the auction, I should have asked you to marry me first. I did things backward.”