Martin continued. “We’d have to play around with it, see what works best.”
“That sounds like a good idea.” She’d also been trying to think of a cute, snazzy name to call her raspberry cupcakes. She’d noted a list of names, but, she didn’t want to show Martin her list right now. She wanted to think about it, come up with a name on her own.
He reached into his back pocket, pulled out his wallet. “I’d wanted to give you this.” He removed a small cardboard slip of paper and handed it to her.
“A ticket to a culinary professional convention?”
“Yes. As you can see, it’s not until much later this summer. It’s in Baltimore, and there will be people from all over the world attending. I think it’ll be good for you to network.”
She studied the ticket, noting that the conference was three days long and the price of the ticket was eight hundred dollars! Martin had already spent so much time and money helping her…maybe she shouldn’t attend this event. She didn’t want to owe him eight hundred more dollars when they decided how much she needed to pay for his services. She opened her mouth, about to object, but, Martin touched her hand. “I didn’t pay for the ticket. I got it for free because of my former connections in the food industry. I even have a hotel room reserved for you. A cousin of mine owns a small bed and breakfast near Baltimore, he’s letting you stay there for a greatly reduced rate during the conference.”
She mentally groaned. If Martin was any nicer to her, she honestly didn’t know what she’d do with herself. She stared at the ticket, trying to figure out what to say.
“So, will you go?”
She nodded. Candy would have to run the bakery by herself while Rhea was gone, but, she didn’t need to focus on that right now. The convention was several weeks away, so, she still had time to plan her schedule. Maybe it would be good for her to meet other food professionals and talk about her business.
After they’d talked for a while longer, Rhea stood, glancing at the clock. “I hate to cut this meeting short, but I have to get ready to go to the law office.”
Martin got out of his chair, touched her cheek. “Okay, I don’t want to make you late.”
He rushed to his car, and she eyed his vehicle while he drove away. She’d revealed yet another layer to Martin about her complicated relationship with her sister. Talking to him, just telling him how she felt, made her feel as if an emotional connection had been formed. Now, if she ever felt as if she needed to confide in someone, she could imagine turning to Martin for advice.
But, she couldn’t form that kind of habit, right? She couldn’t turn to Martin for advice, wanting his comfort when things were going wrong. Could she?
Lord, please help me tonight when I meet with Raven. Also, Lord, please help me as I struggle with my growing feelings for Martin.
*
Rhea pulled Raven’s spare key from her purse, unlocked the basement door. She stepped into the house. Why was it so dark? “Raven?” She flipped on the light. Raven sprawled on the couch, tears poured from her red eyes. “Raven,” Rhea softened her voice. “Why are you lying here in the dark?”
“I was trying to get some sleep. What do you think?” she snapped.
Rhea ignored Raven’s tone while she carefully walked into the living room. She sat on the couch. Both of them remained silent until Raven finally sat up, cringing. “I wasn’t able to sleep well last night.”
“Do your ribs hurt?”
“Yes, I took my medicine, but I was too upset to sleep.”
“Why?”
“Martin doesn’t want me to call him anymore.” She looked at Rhea. “He threatened me.”
“Raven….”
Her eyes widened. “He did threaten me. I’m going to tell his church people that he treats women badly.”
Rhea took Raven’s hand, closed her eyes. Lord, help me to help my sister. Something is wrong, and Lord, I’m not sure how to fix it.
“Listen to yourself. Be rational. You’re upset because Martin isn’t interested in you. Threatening to tell his church about this makes you look petty and childish. Accept that he’s not interested and move on.” She squeezed Raven’s hand. “Why don’t you try and focus on getting better?” She studied Raven—she’d lost weight since the accident. It’d been two weeks since the car wreck and her cheeks were hollow, dark circles shrouded her eyes. “I’m worried about you. Being in such a bad car accident is traumatic. Maybe you need to talk to somebody—”
“I’m not going to a shrink! I’m not crazy! I swear, you sound just like Martin.”
She needed to say something to calm Raven down. Raven’s erratic attitude had caused problems, especially when they were in the fourth grade. “Do you remember Jimmy Brown?”
Raven looked away, her skin reddening. “Yeah, I remember him,” she mumbled.
When they were in fourth grade, a new boy named Jimmy came to their class. He walked with a limp. He’d been mercilessly teased and Raven had a crush on Myron, the boy who’d instigated the teasing. Myron’s good looks and strong brawny manner had appealed to her sister. To get Myron’s attention, Raven had joined in the teasing. Six months later, due to excessive teasing, Jimmy had attempted suicide, swallowing an entire bottle of aspirins. His enraged parents had enrolled him in a new school.
Rhea remembered Raven’s guilt afterwards. Her crush on Myron had disappeared, and Rhea had found her crying several times. Their parents had been concerned, wondering about Raven’s mood swings. “You felt sad and guilty for a long time. You were vomiting and had to stay home sick for a few days after Jimmy tried to kill himself,” Rhea murmured.
She glanced at Raven, saw the tears streaming from her eyes. “You didn’t think about what you were doing when you teased Jimmy. You were so focused on getting Myron’s attention that your logic disappeared. Whenever you become fixated on a good-looking man, I almost feel like you lose focus about everything.”
“What’s your point?” Raven asked, her voice softening.
“My point is, let’s say if you did have the power to ruin Martin’s career, what’ll that do for you? Your actions won’t make Martin like you—he’d be upset and devastated if he didn’t get the pastorship.” She touched Raven’s cheek. “I know you, Raven. I know you better than anybody in this entire world because I’m your twin. If you caused trouble for Martin, you’d feel bad, upset, wishing that you’d kept silent. You’re not malicious, you just need to learn to stop and think about what you’re doing.”
Raven pulled her hand away, swiped the tears from her face. Rhea gave her a tissue and Raven blew her nose.
“Did you just come over here to tell me that?”
“No.” She waited a few minutes, giving Raven time to calm down. “I also wanted to ask you about the wedding dress in your closet. You seem desperate for Martin’s affection—did you buy that dress in hopes of marrying him?”
“I told you I didn’t want to talk about that dress.”
Why didn’t she want to talk about the dress? Maybe talking about it would make Raven feel better. “I wish you’d just tell me why you have it.”
Raven studied the wall for a few moments before speaking. “One of my friends was getting married, and I was a bridesmaid. When we went to the bridal shop to look for our dresses, the sales clerk showed my friend a wedding gown somebody had ordered but never picked up. She offered it at a reduced rate. My friend didn’t care for the dress, but, I loved it. I tried it on and…” She grabbed Rhea’s hand. “Oh, Rhea, it looked so beautiful. I wanted that dress.” She sighed, leaned back on the couch. “I didn’t buy it that day, but I returned a week later and purchased the dress. I didn’t want my friends to know that I was buying it without having a groom.”
She touched Raven’s arm. “When did you buy it?”
Raven winced, looking away. “It was a week after I’d met Martin.”
Rhea resisted the urge to gasp. Had Raven lost her mind?
Raven bit her lip, looked away. “Oh, Rhea. I
’d only seen Martin a couple of times when I got the dress, but I just couldn’t help myself.” She grabbed Rhea’s hand. “I have a plan to be married with two kids by the time I’m thirty and time is slipping away for me...for both of us. I figured when I found the right groom, getting a dress would be one less thing for me to worry about.”
“And Martin was the right groom?” Rhea asked softly.
“Yes, oh, Rhea, he’s perfect! If only he’d pay me more attention. Maybe if I was saved, he might find the courage to date me again.”
Rhea pressed her lips together, took a deep breath. “I’d also wanted to ask you about when you ‘dated’ Martin.”
She frowned. “What do you mean?”
Rhea chose her words carefully. “He says that he was just answering your questions about God and salvation. But you said the two of you were dating. Did you exaggerate about the relationship?”
She narrowed her eyes. “Martin sure has a big mouth. Those discussions were private.” She squeezed her hands together.
“Raven, calm down.”
“Martin liked me. Why else would an attractive man meet with an attractive woman week after week?” She glanced at Rhea. “I saw the people from his church, those single girls that were in the ministry. None of them looked as pretty as me. He chose to spend time, alone, with me after those meetings. That says a lot about his feelings for me.”
Raven was not ready to accept the truth about her “relationship” with Martin.
“He was interested in your salvation. If a person is questioning God and salvation, a Christian is going to tell that person about Jesus.”
Raven sulked, folding her thin arms in front of her chest. Rhea recognized Raven’s stubborn expression—when she looked like that, there was no reasoning with her. It was best to move on to another subject and talk to her about Martin later.
Rhea dropped Raven’s hand, opening her purse. She pulled out a check. “Here’s the first payment for the loan. I really appreciate your helping me out.”
Raven accepted the check, glanced at it, before placing it on the coffee table. “How are things going in your bakery?”
Wow, she’d asked about the bakery! Raven could be so self-centered at times that she forgot to ask about the welfare of others. Her showing interest in the bakery caused Rhea’s mood to brighten. “I’ve been making some changes, and sales are picking up.” She didn’t think it was wise to remind Raven that Martin was responsible for most of those changes. “I’m going to a culinary convention later this summer to network.”
“Yes, it’d probably be good for you to meet some other people in your industry.”
They talked about the bakery for a while before Rhea yawned. “I’m tired. It’s been a long day.” She stood, leaned over, hugged Raven. “I’ll call you tomorrow to see how you’re doing.”
Raven nodded, leaned back, and closed her eyes. Rhea left the house, locking the door behind her. After she’d gotten into her car, she closed her eyes. She’d given Raven something to think about—now, hopefully her sister wouldn’t do anything stupid.
Chapter Eighteen
As soon as Rhea entered her apartment, she pulled out her cell phone and dialed Martin’s number. He answered on the first ring. “How’d it go?”
“I think I’ve convinced her to leave you alone.” She told him everything that had happened during her visit.
“So, she bought the dress because she’d thought she’d marry me?”
“She’s always jumped the gun during her relationships. I think she would’ve purchased the dress no matter whom she was dating.” She didn’t think it was wise to tell Martin that she’d proclaimed to love him after only seeing him a few times. Her sister had been through a lot, and she’d always felt that when their parents divorced, Raven had a hard time accepting their parents’ breakup. She seemed to have a strange desire to have a romantic relationship with any man. Could her motives be linked to what had happened to their parents? Could she be trying to regain happiness by finding a man to love?
“Do you think so? Are you just telling yourself that to make yourself feel better?”
“I believe it. Raven just wants a groom, and she’ll take any good-looking man to whom she’s attracted.”
“Well…I hope she’s okay now.” Silence hummed over the line. Why was he so quiet? It was almost like he had more to say, but, didn’t want to tell her his full thoughts.
“Don’t worry about the dress. Raven is impulsive, and she doesn’t always think rationally. If she had not been out shopping with her friends, I doubt she would’ve bought it in the first place.”
But, was that really true? Maybe she should not have mentioned the dress in the first place. Closing her eyes, memories filtered in her mind, memories of walking into Raven’s closet and finding the wedding dress. The first person she’d told was Martin. Why had she done that? She’d told Martin before she’d even spoken to Raven about the dress.
She needed to learn to think rationally when she spoke to Martin about her sister. She didn’t want Martin to just know about Raven’s negative attributes. Her sister had some positive qualities, too, and Martin needed to understand that. “My sister has been a bit un-nerved since her accident. Can you imagine being immobile for a while? Raven loves being active.”
“If you say so.”
“I think talking about what happened when we were kids sobered her, made her see things more realistically.”
“But, what will happen when she finds out about us?”
Wow, that was a loaded question. Should she act on their attraction? She cared about Martin, she really did, but, was it wise to let him know how she felt? She still wrestled with the fact that he was a pastor. But, perhaps, she should at least let Martin know that his attraction was mutual. “I like spending time with you.” She loved spending time with him! Just hearing him speak on the phone made her heart leap with joy. “But, I still think about Stan and what happened to him. I still struggle about the things going on in your life.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m talking about Linda Tucker, your congregational problems. I know it’s not your fault, but, it still makes me leery. Having been a pastor’s wife, I know how stressful that can be.”
“I understand.”
Rhea slumped onto the couch. “I’m tired. I’ll call you tomorrow.” She hung up the phone, closed her eyes. What would happen if she went ahead and admitted there was more between them besides friendship? Lord, I want to be with Martin, but, I’m struggling to understand if he’s the right person for me, Lord. I keep thinking about Stan, not sure what to do. Please give me some guidance. Amen.
*
Rhea called Raven every night, going to visit her if time allowed. Raven didn’t seem as unsettled, and she said she’d started feeling better once she started eating regularly.
Exhaustion consumed Rhea—getting up every morning, working all day at the law firm, spending hours in the bakery before and after work, and checking in on Raven was taking a toll on her.
She still thought and prayed about her feelings for Martin. Could they become more than just friends? She still spoke with Martin sometimes in the evening, talking about her bakery. But, during these conversations, it seemed as if Martin wanted to say more, as if he were holding back.
He’d mentioned their shared attraction, but, were there reasons why Martin may not want a real relationship with her? He’d never said anything to indicate this, but, she just couldn’t shake the feeling that there may be a reason why Martin had not yet married. After all, he was a good-looking pastor, ministering to an entire congregation. His kind-hearted nature and good looks should’ve opened the doors to allow him to marry by now, right? Wasn’t he in his mid-thirties?
Would he be offended if she asked these questions? No, she couldn’t ask him about that. He’d probably think she’d be getting too personal, getting into his business.
Amidst her thoughts about Martin, she still thought about St
an. Rhea woke up the following Friday, glanced at the date on her iPhone, sighing. This day had been coming, and she’d been doing her best not to focus on it.
It was the two-year anniversary of Stan’s death.
Coincidentally, the law firm had closed that day for their annual employee appreciation picnic. Rhea had declined their invitation. She really needed to spend the day alone.
Later that morning, after Rhea had made the donuts and pastries, Candy strolled into the bakery for her shift. “Hey, Rhea.”
“Hi, Candy. Don’t forget to make Martin’s special fruit cookie recipe. We’ll probably be able to sell some of those this afternoon.”
“Sure thing, Boss.” Candy grinned, going behind the counter. “Did you ever decide on turning your bakery into a café?”
The café. That was yet another subject she’d been discussing with Martin. Placing the warm, glazed sourdough donuts in the display case, she took a deep breath. “It’s been on my mind. Do you know how hard that’s going to be, turning my bakery into a café?”
She slapped Rhea’s shoulder. “It might be fun!” Fun? Changing her bakery into a café could not be described as fun. “You just need to get used to the idea.”
“Yeah, you’re right.” She’d been mulling the idea over since Martin had suggested it, now she just needed to learn to accept the change and move forward.
Another step towards making her bakery profitable was Martin’s marketing ideas.
She grabbed the notebook containing the e-mail addresses. “If you have time, could you type these addresses into our database? Martin suggested I send out a mass e-mail for our grand opening.”
“When is our grand opening? Did you ever set a date?”
“Yes, it’s on June 21st. Martin has already ordered a new sign, and we’ll be getting some new tables.” She grabbed Candy’s hand. “And, if things really take off, I might even be able to give you a raise.”
Candy chuckled, her eyes sparkling. “A raise? I won’t hold my breath, but I hope that happens soon.”
The bell above the entrance dinged, and a crowd of children flooded into the bakery. Most of them were talking at the same time, creating a cacophony of noise that bounced off the walls. Rhea covered her ears. Why would such a big group of kids come to her bakery so early on a Friday morning? Nice to have the extra business, but, why couldn’t these kids quiet down?
Raspberry Kisses (The Bakery Romance Series Book 1) Page 17