Perfection #3
Page 4
“I was thinking that it might be fun to go camping. You know get back to nature at least for a night before we go back to civilization. An open fire, maybe some fishing. What do you say?”
“What do I say? Are you kidding me? What if I can’t run as fast as I did the last time? I mean I’m glad you rescued me there at the end but it was pretty intense right until I fell over the log. I thought I was going to die — now you want to go camping?”
“I understand your apprehension but don’t you think you should get back out there? The animal control person checked the area and there were no more bears. They say that one was a rogue – he shouldn’t have been here. Besides I’m talking about camping on the other side of the lake. It’s a popular spot and we probably would not be the only campers.” She didn’t look convinced but she didn’t argue with me either. She crossed her arms and walked alongside me, looking at the lake and the scenery. I had no idea what she was thinking; Lilly played things close to the vest sometimes. Other times I knew exactly what she was thinking. I loved the outdoors and I wanted to share this beautiful place with her. And if we ended up having sex, that was even better.
“Are you sure? I mean your cabin seems perfect. You really want to go camping in the woods?”
I took her hand and kissed her softly. “Yes I really want to go but I don’t want to force you to go. I tell you what, let’s try it and if you don’t like it we will get back in the boat and come back to this side of the lake. I will make you trek all the way around the lake to go to the campsite. I’ll teach you how to fish. Haven’t you ever wanted to learn or do you already know how?”
“I have never fished a day in my life. I will go but you better bring plenty of bullets—and I mean for the gun. I am pretty sure I can only handle just one of you.”
“Now there’s a fantasy. One of you and many of me. Let’s play that game again. What’s it called? Truth or dare?” She pretended to punch my shoulder but then threw her arms around my neck and kissed me. Her warm lips tasted like peaches — must have been her lip gloss. I liked it. I liked her. Then that question popped up again in my mind.
But do you love her?
Chapter Seven
Lilly
Here I was and I couldn’t believe it. Not two days after being chased by a bear I was loading gear onto a boat with a near stranger and headed back out into the wilderness. There must seriously be something wrong with me. Am I so needy that I would put myself in danger just to be close to him? Quite possibly, because here I sat feeling mad at the world but mostly myself.
Last night had been nice. We had spent a quiet evening at the cabin talking about our favorite books, music and movies. It was nice just to be myself and get to know the good doctor. I had been kind of forward with him that morning but by the time evening rolled around I was tired and not feeling as frisky as he probably wanted. After my near-death experience, I didn’t give a hoot about “keeping him interested” or what it would mean if I didn’t. He had just about convinced me not to go through with the surgery and I had mentioned that once, but still mulled it over. I stopped hanging out around nine telling him I had to study. It was the truth but I didn’t spend much time studying; I spent several hours texting Kate. My dark-haired friend found herself in yet another Riley drama and wanted to call it quits. I had to give it to her — when she went all in, she went all in.
What was really weird was the email that I received sometime late last night. It was a short message from Evan. It was as if he knew I had been talking about him earlier that day. And in his email, which I almost deleted without opening, he apologized for making “the biggest mistake of his life.” He wanted to know if there was some way he could make it up to me. Lilly, I miss our friendship. I let you down in a big way. If you could think of any way, any way at all that I could make it up to you please tell me. I am not the same man you knew.
After rummaging through the pantry and the refrigerator Bullet and I decided that a trip into town wasn’t necessary for our camping date so we loaded up the goods we had and walked to the boat. I didn’t even try to be chipper. The sun had not yet made an appearance and it was far too early to be excited about sleeping in the woods. Trying to cheer me up, he promised me a trip into town once we returned. I look forward to it. I was definitely a city girl, although I seriously doubted if downtown Blue Lake was much more than a few stoplights and shops. If I felt like being honest with myself I was probably feeling crabby because of the email. Why in the world would this guy email me now? Everything had ended so badly yet through his major — and I do mean major screw up — I ended up with a great friend. At least he had good taste in women.
A few minutes into our trip, fingers of color appeared on the distant horizon. The sun emerged quickly casting its glorious light over the lake. What is wrong with you, Lily? Just look at him. Bullet stood behind the wheel of the boat. His dark hair fluttered in the breeze. I could not see where his eyes were focused since he wore dark shades but he shared his brilliant white grin with me. Bullet Steinmann was a thing of beauty; an imperfect womanizer who I wanted to save, just like Evan. I saw how well that worked out the last time.
“Just a few minutes away now. You can see the camp right from here. I see one other boat but that’s it.” Bullet seemed as excited as a kid about to walk into a candy store. I guess he really enjoyed camping — I hoped he could change my perspective. I liked playing outdoors but not sleeping outdoors. Who knew that I would be camping this weekend? I sure didn’t.
In just a few minutes we had pulled up to the dock and secured the boat. The other campers were leaving, just weekenders who happened to be passing through the area. The four of us chatted and we waved goodbye to our new friends and began to unload our goods. Rather than take the spot they had previously used, Bullet wanted to camp out in the adjoining campsite. I saw a small restroom facility and a fire pit — both of which made me a little happier.
“Let’s put the supplies here by the picnic table. I’ll get the tent set up; while you wander around and gather some wood. Don’t go off into the woods, just stick to the campsite.” Oh don’t you worry about that! With a halfhearted smile I set off to gather wood for the fire; apparently we were going to need quite a bit of it. If we stayed all night, and that was a big if, we would need a good stack of wood to keep the fire going. Bullet moved quickly, much quicker than I did. After a few loads, I decided it was time for some coffee. I dug into the bag for the thermos, pouring myself a steaming cup of Java. It smelled like heaven!
“You quitting on me already?” He stowed the sleeping bags inside the tent and stuffed the food in the coolers.
“Nope, just taking a coffee break. I think I’m awake now. So what is on the agenda for today?” I tried to sound happy but I knew it just ended up flat.
“I thought we would go fishing, you said you had never been. It’s time to learn, don’t you think? Bring your coffee and follow me. We’ll fish from the dock. I’m pretty sure there are no bears there.”
I tossed down the last sip of my coffee and screwed the lid back on the thermos. “What is that supposed to mean?” Was he insinuating that I was afraid? Didn’t I have reason to be?
“Is something bothering you? I mean, you have not been yourself since you woke up this morning. I don’t know what the problem is but it would be nice if you were a little happier. How is that for honesty?”
“The only thing that is bothering me is being in the woods. You said a cabin — not a tent. And if I recall correctly, you never mentioned wildlife that might eat me.” God, I sounded bitchy. What was wrong with me?
Bullet stood with his hands on his hips. He looked as pissed as I felt. “I’m going fishing. If you want to come, you know where I will be.” I watched him walk away and I flopped down at the picnic table and put my head in my hands. I knew what this turmoil was really all about. It was about me. I had to leave the past behind and reach for the future. I could not afford to continue to grieve over what I had with Evan
. That was over. He was not who I wanted. I wanted the guy I was with and he wasn’t much better. Man, I needed my head examined. I looked at my watch. Bullet had been gone at least 20 minutes and wasn’t coming back. Oh my goodness! What if he left me here? If I want to be with him so bad, why am I here and not with him? That was a good question. I swallowed my pride and walked toward the pier. Bullet was there, his back towards me. I walked as quietly as I could – I didn’t want to scare the fish, if that was a real thing. I saw that on a movie once. About at the halfway mark, Bullet cocked back the rod and a hook caught me. I screamed in surprise and stared at the back of my hand — there was a hook close digging into me. Immediately Bullet got up and ran to me. I was thankful he didn’t snatch the fishing pole and rip the hook out of my hand.
“That’s not bad. I can get that out.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a knife.
“No! You can’t use that on me.” I pulled my hand away. I didn’t care if he was a surgeon, I didn’t want him digging into me with a Swiss Army knife. He opened a knife to the scissor attachment and cut the line.
“Come on. I have a first aid kit in the tent. It really isn’t bad. I can get that out in no time. See it’s just the top layer of skin. You are lucky — it could have been an eye or your lip.”
“Ow! That really hurts.”
“Well don’t play with it! When I’m done it’ll be gone and you can go back to sneaking up on people.” Bullet sounded aggravated and I can’t say I blamed him but that was no excuse to snipe at me. It was his hook in my hand. His jaw popped and he held me by the arm as if I were going to run away or something. That’s it. I’m done with him. I imagined life without him. Would I even miss him? Wasn’t this just a “sex-cation?” Oh man, I love his cologne.
Who am I kidding? I’m hooked on this guy!
Chapter Eight
Bullet
Walking back to the tent, I couldn’t help but wonder if I had made a huge mistake. Just yesterday I was thinking of being completely, or nearly completely honest with Lilly. What was my reward? Attitude—that was it, we didn’t even have sex last night. If this was any idea of how a real relationship was, I didn’t want it.
Who was I kidding? I was a physical guy with strong physical needs. I liked sex and plenty of it—end of subject. The problem was when we did have sex, it was freaking amazing. Lilly was sexually intuitive and didn’t have a problem initiating contact. She was the perfect balance of good girl and bad girl—my two favorite types of women. I found her insanely attractive but I could not figure her out.
We sat at the picnic table with the first aid kit. My first aid experience kicked in; removing a hook wasn’t going to be difficult but I wanted it to be as painless as possible. Like always, I told my patient what I was going to do before I did it. “First, I am going to apply this topical cream. It’s got a numbing agent that will lessen the pain. Then, I am going to make a small incision, that you won’t even feel right here. The hook will come out and we will clean it and patch it up. You trust me?”
She watched me quietly, “Yes, I do trust you Bullet.”
While I worked, she talked to me. “I know I have been a jerk today. I am sorry for that.” I didn’t bother arguing with her since she was confessing. I wouldn’t have chosen the word “jerk” but it worked too. “I am afraid you have not seen me at my best.”
I held her hand, waiting for the numbing cream to take effect before I made a small incision. I admired the fact that she wasn’t crying or screaming. I’ve seen it all in my line of work—I had even been slapped before. “I don’t know. I’ve had some memorable moments with you.”
“What do you mean?” she asked bashfully, watching me with her luminous green eyes.
I made a small cut in the back of her hand with a tiny scalpel. I was glad that I had included it in my first aid kit. “Well, let’s see. I shot a bear. I had some of the best, most intense sex I have ever had,” I looked her in the eye, “and that’s saying something. Now I’m performing surgery by a lake. Those are all highlights in my book.”
She laughed but I shushed her. “You have to be still for just a minute more. Don’t look!”
“Watching surgery doesn’t bother me. I’m not squeamish about that kind of stuff. I’ve seen plenty of blood.”
“Me too,” I reminded her. “There, look at that. Hook is out now. Let’s clean your hand up.”
“Hmm…not bad at all. You must be a doctor or something,” she flirted with me. I liked seeing her happy. I dabbed antibiotic cream on her wound. It was superficial really. Wrapping it with gauze and tape, she was ready to go. I put the unused items back in the kit and picked up the trash. “Here’s your memento.” I handed her the fish hook. “Don’t put it in your pocket though. I’d hate to see you get that wedged in your bottom.”
Lilly scooted next to me on the picnic table. “I don’t know what to do about you, Bullet Steinmann.”
“Oh, I think you know exactly what to do. I have no doubt who’s in control here.” And it simultaneously excites me and frustrates the hell out of me.
Looking innocent, she said softly, “Me?” I closed my first aid kit and looked at her. Her heart-shaped face and wild hair enchanted me. I was beginning to think that staying over was a very bad idea. Lilly Brightwood made me soft—weak. Those were two things I was not accustomed to.
“Yeah-—you. I’m going fishing, you coming this time or do you plan to wait for a panther to walk by?” Her green eyes widened in surprise. “I’m kidding, there are no panthers here. I think. Of course, there was this circus train once that derailed nearby.”
She smacked my arm playfully with her good hand. “Okay, show me your mad fishing skills. Any exotic wildlife I should know about in Blue Lake? Gators? Piranhas? Crocs?”
I put my arm around her waist protectively. “The only predator you should be worried about is the one beside you.” I growled at her and grabbed her butt, and she squealed and ran towards the lake laughing. Her bad mood disappeared and we were just too young people having fun out by a lake. We were a lot alike; both of us had to grow up too quickly. Both of us dealt with tragedy in very different ways but now here we were together.
I gathered up my broken fishing pole, picked up one for her and together we sat on the pier running lines and attaching hooks. I made her put her hand in the cricket basket to get her bait out. Despite her many faces, her mission was accomplished. To her credit, she hooked the cricket just like I told her. The casting lesson did not go so well but in the end we got the hooks in the water. The day was warming up; the sky was blue and expansive over us. It was just the two of us. She had pulled her curly blonde hair back in a feisty ponytail and rolled her sleeves up to her shoulders. We both had our jeans rolled up to our knees, our feet dangling in the water. It was peaceful, something I had not experienced since my father died.
“Well if we ever do catch something we can cook it because I brought everything we need for some pan seared fish. I’ll make you a deal: I clean them, you cook them. Deal?”
She gave me a mock salute and suddenly there was a tug on her line. Obediently, she did not squeal or frighten the fish by shouting. She mouthed the words, “Oh my God,” to me.
I whispered to her, “Breathe and hold the fishing pole lightly. He’s nibbling but you want him to grab hold. Don’t spook him!” We waited, our eyes glued on the cork. Finally—the orange cork bobbed up and down furiously! “Now, snatch him to the side and get the hook in!” Again, she followed my directions. She was on her feet, her ponytail swinging wildly, her bare feet strong and sturdy on the pier.
“I think I got him Bullet!” She jumped up and down.
“No celebrating until we get him on the pier! Reel him in, Lilly. That’s right, faster!” With a victorious grin, she pulled him up on the pier where he flopped. He was about ten pounds, perfect for eating. “What luck, girl! Great job! I am so proud of you! Hooked your own pole, snagged a fish and brought him in! That’s what I call good fishing!�
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She laughed and held the fish with both hands, ignoring his wriggling. Now would come the tough part. Girls usually hated to watch you clean fish. I loved it. It wasn’t a big deal, it’s not like the fish were alive when you gutted it; well not completely anyway. Lilly was the opposite. True to her word, she wasn’t squeamish at all; she followed my instructions and made the perfect cut and pulled out the guts without bursting any of the organs. I told her not to worry about scaling it right now; we had more fish to catch.
“But do we need more than that? I don’t eat that much, Bullet.” She looked so pretty, even with fish guts hanging on her fingers.
“No, we’ll throw back whatever we catch now. No sense in catching more than we need.” She tossed the fish in the cooler and washed her hands in the lake water. We went on to catch five more but they were all smaller than Lilly’s first fish.
After hours of joking and competing for the largest fish, it was obvious that Lilly was the winner. Hands down the girl was truly a natural. She didn’t whine, she didn’t complain — she just got in there and had fun. That was my kind of girl. I wondered if Lily had more skills than she told me. Hmm… Did I get played? If I did I didn’t care because I was impressed. I reached into the other cooler and pulled out a beer. Popping the top, I handed it to her. “To the victor, go the spoils. This Bud is for you Lilly Brightwood.” She raised her beer to me and took a big swig. She let her hair down from her ponytail and shook it. God I wanted to put my hands in it, and maybe some other parts of my body.
Chapter Nine
Lilly
Eating the fish that I caught with my own hands was a surreal experience. I had no idea that I was a proficient fisherman. I thought at first it was a fluke of some sort. But after I caught three more I began to realize that I had hidden talents, hidden even from myself. I was happy that I got to discover that with Bullet. It was a thrill to actually beat him in something.