I made sure that we were out of earshot as I slipped Cee the note from lunch. “Thank you for my sandwich today. It was delicious.”
“You're delicious,” he said with a grin. He raised his hand, paused for a moment and then placed it on my arm. I loved the weight of his fingers against my skin and the electricity it sent flooding down my body. “I'll bring you another tomorrow.”
He licked his lips as if thinking about kissing me but then stopped and smiled. He shook his head and dropped his hand.
“Bye, Cee!” Ben called out, coming into the hallway.
I took a short breath. We had been so close to getting caught. It was a good thing Cee was paying attention.
Cee waved, walking through the summer sunshine back to his car and driving off. I held up my hand, waving as he went and wishing I could send him off with so much more.
***
“Yes, No, Maybe? What is he, in elementary school?” Melissa asked as she looked at the notes. There was one for everyday this week so far and I had brought his notes to our weekly get together to get their input on the whole thing. Melissa was not one for romantic gestures, so I just dismissed her comments.
“I think it's kind of cute if you ask me,” Cindy admitted as she thumbed through a few of them.
“He is really laying it on thick. He must really want to get you into bed,” Tricia declared, playing with her martini glass.
“Well he, um...” I felt my cheeks redden and took a sip of my wine trying to avoid eye contact with them. I hoped it was dark enough in the restaurant that they wouldn’t notice.
“You already had sex with him, didn’t you?” Melissa nudged me in the ribs. She was always particularly nosy about this subject. “I was wondering why you had that extra bounce in your step and curl in your hair. How was it? Give me all the details.”
“Well, um, I...” I was embarrassed. I hated to have all the attention on me. I also felt I would be bragging if I told them how amazing he was. My face heated up even more just remembering the way every glorious inch felt rocking inside me
“You don’t have to tell us those details.” Cindy shot a look at Melissa. “What I want to know is are you happy, and do you like him?”
I sat there for a moment as I muddled through my thoughts. “I'm happy. I actually enjoy waking up in the morning. Cee is great. He is wonderful with Ben and patient with me. I have never felt more adored by a man before. He may be younger than me, but he brings this indescribable energy to me that gives me life. Even after we did the, um... deed... he didn’t change how he treated me. If anything he seems more interested in pursuing me.” As I said each word out loud the pit in my stomach shrank.
“Then what is stopping you from taking the next step?” Tricia probed, popping the olive of her martini into her mouth.
“I'm scared, I think? I can feel these emotions building up inside of me. I keep shutting them down,” I admitted. I thought about the pebble of doubt that still scratched at me. I didn't want to get hurt again.
“Stop it! Why would you want to shut down such great feelings?” Cindy inquired.
“I just... After Richard, and how blind I was to the whole cheating thing, I don’t want to get hurt again. Cee is also so young. I just can’t see him wanting to be with an older woman with a kid. Or Ben. He has already had to deal with so much. What if this doesn’t work out and he loses another man that he looks up to?”
Melissa spoke up. “First off, screw the Dick, I mean Richard. He shouldn’t be a factor in your thoughts anymore. He was an asshole. Just a little man with big issues. You need to live your life, the way you want and stop living in fear.”
“Here, Here!” the other two women cheered.
“Second,” Melissa continued. “If he had a problem with your age and Ben, do you think he would be trying this hard to be with you? Yes, he may be a few years younger, but if he is making you feel happy, age is just a number. And finally, we all know the Ben reason is bullshit. Ben is a lot stronger than you give him credit for. He would want you to be happy.”
I was ashamed that she had called me out, but she was right. I was using Ben as a shield. I was using all of those excuses as a defense.
“There are only three questions you have left to answer. Do you like Cee?” Melissa searched my eyes as she asked the question. I felt as though she was trying to see my soul.
“I... um...” I adverted my gaze feeling uncomfortable with all of the attention.
“It’s a simple yes or no question. Do you like him?” Melissa questioned again.
“Yes, yes I do,” I admitted. As I said the words, I felt them wash over me, slowly dissolving that pebble of doubt lodged in my stomach.
“Now, that was the easy question, this is the big one. Do you love him?” Melissa continued to stare at me.
I paused for a moment, but I knew the truth. “Yes, I'm falling in love with my nanny,” I admitted. A smile grew over my lips. I was in love with my nanny. The doubt that I was holding on to had eroded away.
“Wahoo!” The girls cheered.
Melissa lifted up her hand to silence them. “Now, what are you going to do about it?”
I sat and thought. I knew exactly what I was going to do.
“Let me show you. Cover my tab, I'm going to go do something I should of done weeks ago.” I grabbed my purse and sprinted to my car. I knew that if I thought about what I was going to do next for too long, I would chicken out.
***
My head had finally surrendered to the battle and my heart was celebrating its victory. I made it to my house and found Cee laying on the couch. My heart was pounding in my chest as I kneeled in front of him. I seized his head in my hands pulled him in for a hard kiss. His hands went to my hair pulling me in more. I melted into him. My entire body was alive with excitement, with hope. My lips were on fire, my brain was screaming for air, but I wanted to stay that way forever. I finally had to succumb to my primal instinct and release from our grasp to take in a gasp of oxygen.
“What was that for?” Cee asked. His voice was breathless, taken aback by the whole moment. His chest lifted and fell in big gasps. He needed to take a breath as much as I did.
“The answer is yes. Yes, I like you, and yes, I think I'm falling in love with you.” I stopped with my mouth still forming around the word you. That was a bit more than what I wanted to say at that exact second. I wished I could take the words back.
The blood pulsated through my ears waiting for a reaction. He didn’t move for what seemed like forever. My head started racing with everything that might go wrong in the next ten seconds. He sat up from his laying position on the couch, grabbed my hands and looked deep into my eyes.
Say something. Say anything, I was screaming in my mind.
He inhaled slowly. Then, he smiled. “I have wanted to hear those words since the day I met you. I have wanted to say these words to say those words to you since the day you first let me into your house. I love you,” he said, grinning. Then, he surprised me by putting his hands on my face and greedily pulling my mouth onto his.
I was complete. Perfect. Happy. I knew my head was no longer was fighting my heart. My body wanted more than just a kiss on my lips. I wanted his hands on me, his mouth on me and I wanted to start now.
“Want to go upstairs?” Cee asked, as if he could read my mind.
I suddenly remembered my son. “What about Ben? I don’t want to wake him up.”
“He’s not here. He left about ten minutes ago,” he said. “Your friend Cindy called me and said her son wanted to have a sleepover with him. She said you okayed it.”
Cindy, that devilish woman, had known what I planned on doing when I left the bar. She had made sure I was going to be able to have it without interruption. I'd have to thank her later.
I nodded my head, and he took my hand in his. We scampered up the stairs to the bedroom. Cee patted my butt gently with each step. I giggled and tried to outrace him to the bed, but he was hot on my heels.
When I finally threw myself down on the bed, I was breathing heavily, but it wasn't from running up the stairs. I felt young and ready. Cee pulled me to the edge of the bed, and I let out a squeal as my dress rode up and exposed my thighs. I sat up and my hands went to take his shirt off. I felt his strong muscles under flex as I pulled it over his head.
“Tonight, we are going to take it slow,” he said. He smiled a devilish grin, his eyes were dark with desire. He rolled up my dress, exposing my thighs, and ran his hand up my legs. His calloused hands felt rough and hot.
“Smooth,” he said with a smile, and started to plant kisses from my knee up.
He made it to my panties before I bucked my hips forward. I couldn’t wait for his lips any longer, but he pulled away and leisurely made his way back down. He was teasing me. My dress came off over my head in one easy pull. I sat on my bed in bra and panties. Without thinking, I crossed my hands over my body.
“You are stunning.” He whispered in my ear grabbed my hands and uncovered my body.
He stared at me with such reverence that I felt like a goddess. I relaxed and he moved in for a kiss on my lips. He continued down my neck to my left breast as he undid my bra. I swore each kiss lasted a lifetime, and I never wanted it to stop.
The second my breasts were free of their confines his mouth was on my nipple, sucking and providing a quick nip of the teeth. I let out a moan enjoying the mix of soft and hard. He cupped my other breast and palmed my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Just when I was about to explode he stopped and continued his kisses downward.
He only stopped when he hit my panty line. He looped a finger underneath and pulled them off with a smooth motion. His lips lavished each inch of my inner thigh until his mouth was on me, on all of me. He ran his tongue over my wetness, making me grab the sheets and ball them.
I lifted my hips to get more of him, as much of him as I could. He grabbed hold of my butt with one hand and held it up so he could go deeper. He continued the back and forth movement of his tongue as he carefully slid a finger inside, stroking in an alternate pattern. I grabbed his hair, pulling him in. My body ached for him. I moaned as I felt his tongue and fingers move. I knew I was going to climax, but I wanted him first.
“Cee, please,” I begged. “Please.”
He seemed to know exactly what I wanted. He quickly produced a condom out of nowhere. I watched with anticipation as he slowly rolled it onto himself before positioning himself over me. I knew how aroused I was, how ready I was for him, so it didn't surprise me at all when he pressed into me without any effort at all.
“Oh my god,” he said. “You're so wet.”
I smiled and then moaned as he pulled my hands up over my head on the bed, pounding into me. The angle of his cock was fantastic, hitting all the right spots, and rubbing against me in a way that I knew would have me orgasm. As I felt myself get closer to orgasm, I wrapped my legs around his back. He seemed to understand what that meant, doubling his efforts.
I felt my body open to him, drawing him in deeper as my body spasmed. I now knew what the French meant when they called an orgasm “the little death”, as my body surrendered to him completely. I was completely his.
And that's why, when he pulled out of me and turned me over, I didn't argue at all. For once, I wasn't self conscious about my weight. For once, I didn't care. I was completely his. And as I pushed myself up onto my hands and knees, baring myself to him, enticing him to take me again, I knew that he appreciated the way I looked.
I heard him grunt with pleasure as he took me from behind. The penetration was so deep that I almost told him to slow down, but I couldn't find the words. I just accepted it, accepted how good it all felt. I knew it felt good for him as well. With his hands on my hips, I could feel exactly how turned on he was by all of this.
When those hands began to squeeze harder, I knew he was ready. “Come for me,” I moaned, just as before. He didn't seem to argue at all. He needed release, and the only thing I could think about was the rhythm of our love-making. I felt him swell within me, somehow becoming even bigger than he had been before. I heard him practically roar behind me, then heard his ragged breathing as I knew he orgasmed.
I lowered my hips to the bed, hugging my pillow and cooing softly as he finished his orgasm. He followed me down, panting as he put his full weight on top of me. His muscles felt so good on top of me. With the events of the day, I was exhausted, and I fell asleep before he even pulled out of me.
Chapter Twenty-Two
I woke up in the morning wrapped in his strong arms, relieved that it wasn’t just a dream. My clock said I still had another few minutes until I had to get up and get ready for work, so I decided to make the most of it. I snuggled in closer to Cee, feeling his breath lightly tickle the back of my neck.
“Good morning, beautiful,” Cee whispered.
“Good morning, yourself. I thought you were still asleep.”
“Why would I want to sleep the time I have with you away? You are much better than any dream I could ever have.” He gently kissed my temple, brushing my hair to the side.
I chuckled. He was such a smooth talker. He drew me in tighter and we laid there in comfortable silence with only Cee’s soft breathing dictating the passing of any time. I wanted to freeze this moment forever.
BEEP BEEP BEEP
My phone alarm started to go off, pulling me out of my perfect moment.
“Ugh,” I sighed. I did not want to get up and go to work. It took all my will power to roll out of bed and put my feet on the floor. I sat for a moment and tried to motivate my body to move. As the nerves started to respond to my brain's request, I felt a chin on my shoulder.
“You could always play hooky today and just hang out,” Cee recommended. His voice was like a lullaby and shut off the commands my brain had worked so hard to relay to my muscles. His strong arms wrapped around me and drew me back to bed. He looked at me, his eyes big and pleading.
“I don’t know... I really shouldn’t do that. I have only been there for a couple of months.”
“It would just be one day, you know everyone else at work has already played hooky once,” he cooed. “I would definitely show my appreciation if you did it.” He started to nuzzle my neck. My will power hit the road as he kissed my ear.
“Oh, fine, I'll do it, but you owe me.” I rolled over and grabbed my phone.
“Thank you for calling TrueTech Accounting. This is Daniel, how can I direct your call?”
“Hi, Daniel, this is Jes. I'm not going to make it into work today. I feel a little under the weather. Can you let Steve know?”
“Sure thing. I hope you feel better.”
I hung up the phone and looked at Cee.
“So how are you going to make it up to me?” I asked as I laid the phone down on the nightstand.
“Let me show you.” He brought me in for a deep kiss, pulling me into him. What I got was way more than just a kiss.
***
“As much as I want to stay in bed with you, we have some things to do today.” Cee jumped out of bed and pulled on his boxers. That was one view that I would never get sick of. I lay there, entangled in the sheets, and feeling like every muscle in my body was humming with pleasure.
“I’m going to run to my apartment, and get changed,” he said. He leaned over me and gave me a warm kiss. “Let's grab Ben and have a day at the beach.”
“A man with a plan. I love it.” I rolled over to get out of the bed and watched as that ass left my bedroom. I hated to see him go, but I loved to watch him walk away.
After a long shower, I threw on my go-to bathing suit. It was a one piece that was black, but had a low front and a super low back. It hid all the troubled tummy spots, but I thought it made my rack look amazing. With a pair of swim shorts and a sundress thrown on top, I was ready for a day at the beach.
Ben was ready and as excited to spend the day with Cee as I was. We headed to the nearest beach with umbrellas, towels, and
of course lacrosse supplies. It took us about two hours to get there by car, but I was pleasantly surprised at how easy the traffic was. The company made it even better.
I stepped out into the sun, clutching my floppy hat as a breeze went by. The sand stuck to my ankles whipped up by the breeze and I could taste the salt water in the air. It was a gorgeous day out, perfect to spend at the beach. We laid out all of our stuff on the hot white sand and Cee placed down the cooler.
“I have lunch for us, too,” he said. He stood up and took off his shirt, exposing his smooth muscular chest.
I followed each muscle down until I reached his swim trunks, which hung off his hips. I gave a big gulp as my face went hot. I had seen him naked multiple times, but for some reason, he always was able to make me be hot and bothered just standing there.
“What do you want to do first?” Cee asked Ben as he poured on some sunscreen.
“Can we go practice? I haven’t played in a few days and I want to make sure I'm ready for the game.”
They both looked at me, begging for my approval with their big puppy dog eyes.
“Go. I'm just going to be here getting some sun. But you better put some sunscreen, Ben.” I kept a watchful eye on my son as he put on his sunscreen. He always forgot and would turn as red as a lobster, and then complain.
“You too, mister.” I scolded Cee playfully. Watching him rub that sunscreen all over those delicious muscles was too good to pass up. He had an amazing sheen once he was done that made him look he was about to do a photo shoot for a swimming magazine. He caught me staring and winked at me, causing my cheeks to redden further from the already hot sun.
Cee got Ben’s back with the lotion and I laughed when Ben tried to get Cee’s. Ben had to jump up and down to reach his shoulders. I gave them both a once over and then nodded. They were good to go. The next moment, I had a bottle of sunscreen tossed at my face and I could see the backs of the two boys sprinting down the beach. I shook my head watching them as I got settled.
I opened up the bright blue beach umbrella and stuck it firmly in the sand. It only provided enough shade to cover half my blanket, but it would have to do. I tried to lay down on the warm sand, grunting as I adjusted the black swimsuit and shorts. The suit may have been my favorite, but I still hated the way the fabric rode up. When I finally felt that I had settled and looked somewhat decent on the towel, I stuck my legs out in the sun and watched the boys. Cee and Ben were throwing the ball back and forth between their sticks. My book was propped up on my chest and I started to read.
Walking on Sunshine: A Sweet Love Story (Seasons of Love Book 1) Page 13