by LK Shaw
“Why?” I tried not to let my hurt feelings show, but I knew I was transparent and Brody could see right through me.
He rubbed a hand down his face in a gesture of fatigue and deep thought, letting out a huff of air and shrugging like he couldn’t pinpoint anything specific. “For so many reasons. Shame. Guilt. Fear.”
I zeroed in on a single word. “What do you mean, shame?”
He stared at the floor, refusing to meet my eyes. “I was a member of law enforcement. I’d sworn to uphold the law and bring down criminals. When you’ve been as far undercover as I’ve been, you don’t just play a role, Ines. You become the role or you die. There are days I woke up hating who I’d become, the things I’ve done. But, in the end, I ignored it because I didn’t want to look too closely at the choices I’d made. I should have resisted the drugs, the killing. Instead, I became immune to them. When I killed Paulo, I should have been horrified by what I’d done. I wasn’t. Not then. Not now. In fact, I would do it all over again. Being undercover made me weak. I’m no better than the people I was trying to bring down.”
I leapt up from the couch and dropped to my knees in front of Brody, clasping his hand in mine. It finally hit me what Victor and Estelle had been trying to tell me.
“Stop that nonsense this instance. You were in an untenable position. I can’t even imagine how you were able to do it all those years. I would have broken a long time ago. You’re stronger than you think, Brody.”
He finally focused on me, a sad smile on his face, as he reached out to cup my cheek. “The one truly good thing I’ve done in the last five years was protect you the only way I knew how. Keep the truth from you. You not knowing I was D.E.A. kept you alive.”
I covered his hand with mine and leaned into his touch before turning my head to kiss his palm. “I know it was. At first, I was so hurt that you kept it from me. I mean, you knew so much about me, and I barely got to scratch the surface of who you were. And then to hear it from Alejandro, of all people? It just really hurt.”
“I’m sorry, baby. I wanted to tell you, but I couldn’t bring myself to. I hope you can forgive me.”
Instead of giving Brody words, I leaned up and brought my lips to his. Forgiveness was in my very touch. Getting to my feet, I reached for his hand and pulled him to stand. I reached up to kiss him again and then dropped back down to my knees, pulling his sweatpants down with me. I licked my lips in appreciation of the gorgeous sight in front of me. Not giving him time to do anything, I gripped his shaft in my hand at the same time I leaned forward and ran my tongue up his length, circling the head before engulfing it fully in my mouth.
I worshipped Brody with my lips and tongue, savoring his musky flavor. I traced the vein on the underside of his cock, squeezing the base with exquisite tension. As much as I wanted to suck him dry, I needed him inside me even more.
“Sit.” I gently nudged his bare chest at the same time I issued my directive.
Brody followed my command, his legs spread, his good arm resting along the back of the couch. He looked entirely too comfortable. I wanted him as desperate for me as I was for him. Slowly, I gave a little strip tease, giving him tantalizing glimpses of bare skin before covering it up again and teasing him with a new location of skin. Soon, his eyes were feverish with need and he was breathing hard. It was time to stop teasing us both. I gripped my shirt and ripped it up and over my head, my unbound breasts fully in view. Then, came my pants and underwear. I kicked off my shoes before stepping out of the circle of clothes at my feet.
I moved in and straddled his lap, rocking myself against him. Brody cursed at the sensation.
“I don’t have a condom.”
I stopped moving for a moment. “I’m on the pill, and I haven’t been with anyone else in a while.”
“You’re the only woman I’ve slept with in five years.”
At that pronouncement, my mouth fell open. “What? Are you serious? I mean, not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’m just…surprised.”
Brody shrugged, a tinge of a blush still gracing his cheeks. “I’ve been kind of busy is all.”
I cupped his cheeks and stared into his eyes. “I’m glad. Now, I want you to touch me.”
His expression shifted and a devious smile appeared. He moved his free hand off the back of the couch and placed it on my thigh, squeezing gently before skimming it up and down my body, wherever he could reach. Everywhere but where I wanted him to touch me most. My core throbbed, and I begged against his lips.
“Please.”
His mouth broke from mine, but his fingers continued their path up my thigh, stopping just short of where I was desperate for his touch.
“Please, what?”
I groaned in torturous agony when his finger ghosted across my clit. I arched into the touch, needing more contact, but Brody pulled back.
“Touch me, damn it.” I thrust my pelvis forward, my fingernails digging into his bicep.
This time, his hand reached out to cup my breast, his thumb flicking my nipple, shooting a spark of pleasure through me.
“Here?”
“No, you jerk, here.” My hand found its way to my core, the place I wanted him the most, and I shoved two fingers inside me, needing to feel my pussy clenching on something.
“Fuck me, that’s hot.” His voice was gravelly with arousal. “But isn’t that my job?”
I threw my head back when I gave another thrust of my digits. “I was tired of waiting on you.”
He chuckled at my sassy remark. “Well, wait no longer.”
A moan erupted from deep inside me when one of his fingers joined mine.
“Oh god,” I cried out when a second one joined the other three. My pussy had never felt so full as it did with four fingers pushing deep inside me. I clenched my muscles, trying to keep him inside me when he made to pull them out. I was stretched so wide, and the ache that started in my belly spread. When Brody’s thumb rubbed circles around my clit, I was lost. I screamed when the orgasm hit. Rainbow colored lights burst behind my eyes and my pussy spasmed with the force of my climax.
“You’re so beautiful. You know that, right?”
“You make me feel beautiful.” I gasped when he pulled out his fingers. I followed suit. “I need you inside me. I need you to fuck me. Now.”
Without waiting for a response, I lowered myself onto his engorged cock. He rocked upwards a few times, too slowly for my liking, torturing me in the process. Having none of it, I raised up on my knees before slamming myself back down onto him. I cried out his name in ecstasy when he entered me entirely.
Once again, I clenched my muscles, this time causing him to moan low.
“Now, fuck me.”
Brody raised a single eyebrow and gave me a cocky, satisfied smile. “Yes, ma’am.”
He gripped my hip, hard, and began to thrust upward. His mouth met mine again, his tongue darting inside to match the rhythm of his cock pounding into my pussy. He continued his assault on my body as he reached between us to circle my clit. Tension built when he hit that right spot deep inside. I met his thrusts with downward ones of my own and as the pressure spread through me and another orgasm rushed through me like a volcanic eruption. Brody thrust a few more times and then his climax hit. His seed washed my insides and small tremors continued to rock my body as his movements slowed and became less deep.
I collapsed against his sweat-covered chest, our breathing ragged. We both groaned when I shifted and his cock jerked inside me. I pulled back and dismounted, but he refused to let me go far, so I sat on his lap, his arms wrapped around me. I laid my head on his shoulder and basked in the feeling of closeness.
“I resigned from the agency.”
I lifted my head. “Why?”
“It just didn’t feel right to be a part of it anymore. I’m not the same man I was when I joined. It’s not something I think I could do anymore. Not now.”
I laid my hand on Brody’s chest, tracing the spot where his heart was.
“What do you want to do?”
He inhaled and let it all out. “I was thinking Colorado sounded like a beautiful place.”
My fingers stopped moving. “Really? What about us?”
He brushed my sweat-dampened hair off my face, his eyes searching my face. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but I was kind of hoping you’d come with me. You don’t have to give me an answer today. I know it’s a lot to take in. I just want you to think about it.”
“Yes.”
Now it was his turn to appear surprised. “Are…are you sure?”
I feverishly nodded my head, smiling brightly. “Definitely. I’ll go wherever you are, Brody. I love you.”
It struck me then, I’d never told him that. Of course, neither had he, but this felt right. He laughed and kissed me like crazy.
“God, Ines, I love you so much. You’ve made me so happy. I have no idea what I’m going to do there, but I know I’ll figure something out. I have a comfortable savings, so we’ll be okay for a while.”
I laughed right along with him. “We’ll figure something out. We’re a team now Brody, you and me. You’re not alone anymore.”
Chapter 31
I’d received a phone call from Preston a few days ago telling me he was leaving Pleasant Village. He’d reached the point in his recovery where he felt ready for the real world again. This was his second time leaving the Village, and I prayed it was the last. That he could find a reason to stay clean. To date, his longest sober streak was four years. I’d respected his wishes to not come visit again, but during our talk I’d asked him if I could please visit before he left. I’d told him there was someone I wanted to introduce to him. I’d actually been surprised he’d agreed to us coming.
“Are you nervous?”
Ines squeezed my hand as we stood outside the familiar white building I hadn’t seen in months.
“A little. We didn’t part on the best of terms the last time I was here. I’m in a different place than I was then. I just…I just don’t want to fuck things up.”
“Hey, I’m here if things get tense. Everything is going to be fine.”
Her words helped me steel my spine, and I kissed our joined hands, thankful for this woman in my life. “I love you.”
She smiled brilliantly at me before half-leading me into the building. The echo of our footsteps sounded throughout the foyer until we were finally at the front desk, where the ever-helpful Mary sat. She smiled when she looked up from her desk, but it faltered when she saw the shape I was in. The bruises on my face were fading, but still obvious, and my arm was supported in an immobilizer. She quickly recovered, especially when her gaze landed on Ines.
“Welcome back, Mr. Thomas. We’ve missed you these last couple months. And who is this lovely lady?”
“Hi, Mary. This is Ines.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mary.”
“You as well. Preston will be so happy to see the two of you. He’s out in the garden. Would you like an escort?”
I shook my head, smiling to soften the denial. “No, thank you. I know the way.”
The smell of honeysuckle wafted through the air as we weaved our way along the path toward the center. We turned a corner and there he was. Looking the same, yet different. Stronger. Preston looked over at our approach and love for my brother rushed through me. I waited for the bitterness to follow, but oddly, it remained at bay. His eyes darted between me and my condition and Ines, and I could see the question in them. I hadn’t told him who I was bringing, only that I wanted him to meet someone.
When we came abreast of him, my tongue suddenly stuck to the roof of my mouth and I had trouble speaking. Luckily, Ines took control. She reached out her hand, greeting Preston like an old friend.
“Hi, I’m Ines. I’m so glad to finally meet you. Your brother has told me all about you.”
I finally found my voice. “It’s really good to see you.”
And for the first time since our mother’s death, I pulled my brother into a hug, holding on tightly, completely disregarding the stinging discomfort in my shoulder. I don’t even know how long we stood there embracing, but a sniffle from Ines reminded me where we were. Reluctantly, I pulled back not even realizing until that moment that my eyes were damp. A quick glance confirmed the same for Preston. We both self-consciously cleared our throats.
“Would you like to have a seat?”
Ines sat on the end, pulling me down next to her so I sat sandwiched between her and my brother when he took his place. Once we were seated, she continued holding my hand like she was lending me her strength.
“Thank you for letting me come visit. I know things have been…tense between us for a long time. I haven’t been a very good brother. There’s been so much unnecessary blame, which is my fault. I’ve had a lot of bitterness building inside me. For that, I’m sorry.”
Preston sat back against the wooden bench, a dazed expression on his face. “Wow, this is a little bit of a surprise. I’m not sure what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything. I just hope you can forgive me. For everything. Maybe not today. But someday. I want us to be brothers again.”
He sat silently, absorbing my words. There were so many things I wanted to share with him. About my life over the last ten years. About Ines. I also wanted to get to know him better.
“I think I’d like that.” Until Preston actually said the words, I didn’t realize how much I wanted this. I released Ines’ hand and pulled him in for another hug. It felt really good.
“So, what are your plans for when you leave here?”
His shrug was non-committal. “Honestly, I have no idea. I mean, I don’t have a lot of life skills, you know? I talked to my sponsor, and she has some construction work lined up for me, but that’s not something I want to do forever. It will get me by for a while and pay the bills, so I’m not going to complain.”
“Where will you be staying?”
“There’s a halfway house that has an open bed for practically nothing. I just have to help keep the place up along with certain chores. It’s part of the deal to live there.”
“Ines and I are leaving Chicago and heading to Colorado. You could always come with us. We could all start over.”
I wasn’t sure who was more surprised by the offer, Preston or me. Well, maybe Ines, considering the offer just popped out. It wasn’t something she and I had discussed prior to coming here, but I knew how important family was to her, and I was sure she wouldn’t balk at the idea. She confirmed my thought when she spoke over my shoulder.
“We’d love to have you. I know Brody would really like to get to know you better. As would I.”
Preston continued to appear slightly off balance. I had a feeling our expressions matched.
“Wow. This is such a surprise. Let me think on it. I don’t want to impose.”
“It wouldn’t be an imposition at all. But I understand needing to think about it. It’s an important decision, and you have to do what’s right for you. Whatever decision you make, please know I’m here for you.”
He nodded. “I appreciate that. So, why don’t you tell me how you two met.”
Ines and I stayed a little while longer to chat, giving Preston the abridged version of our meeting. We didn’t go into detail, figuring it was best left for another time. When it was time for us to leave, we promised to get together again before we left for Colorado if he chose not to come with us. While Ines and I walked out to the car, I truly felt, for the first time in years, that Preston and I were going to be okay, and that I finally had my brother back.
Chapter 32
It had been two weeks since Alejandro’s death and Miguel’s escape. There was a nationwide APB out on him, but he’d gone deep underground. Who knew how long it would take him to emerge and start to rebuild, because we both knew he would. He craved money and power too much not to.
In the meantime, life was moving forward. For obvious reasons, I stopped working at Sweet SINoritas. But I
hated that I’d left Michele in the dark about why I was no longer there and who I really was. I’d grown to care for her over the last few months, and the guilt ate at me that the last time I’d seen her was when I was being loaded into an ambulance. She had no idea what had happened to me. Which was why I was standing in the doorway of the ladies’ locker room.
“Hey.”
Michele looked up in surprise at my soft-spoken greeting. She rushed over, robe swinging behind her like a cape, and threw her arms around me. “Oh my god, Gabby! I’ve been so worried about you. Damon told me you were taking some time off after Alejandro’s attack, but it’s been forever and I hadn’t heard from you. I had no idea if you’d be back or not. And I had no idea how to get a hold of you. You never gave me your phone number. How come you never gave me your phone number? I needed to make sure—”
“Michele, stop,” I interrupted her babbling, although my arms had returned her embrace. Her continued rambling only made the guilt run deeper.
She complied with my request and pulled back, looking at the newly formed scar on my face. I’d had the stitches removed last week, and it was still a little tender. I also still had a yellowish bruise along my jawline. Her expression changed to one of anger. “I hate him for what he did to you. I don’t understand why he did this.”
I wondered how much I should tell her. Next to Estelle, she was one of my closest friends. I just hoped she didn’t hate me after I told her the truth. Praying I wasn’t going to regret this, I took her hand.
“Let’s go outside and talk.”
She continued to wear a worried expression, but she followed my lead through the doors until we stood in the parking lot. Despite it being May, the air was still chilly in the evenings, especially with the breeze coming in off the lake. I cursed at myself, forgetting how little Michele wore. She was probably freezing.
“On second thought, maybe we should go inside. You have to be cold.” I started to tug her back toward inside, but she waved me off.