by Nicole Nwosu
“Do you ever miss it?”
“What’s with all the fucking questions?”
My hands went up in defense at his sudden tone shift. “I’m just asking.”
His expression softened. “Can we just—” He gestured to the ball at my feet and I moved over to the field.
He handled the ball with more aggression today, and when he missed a shot at the open net, I asked, “You okay?”
“Yeah,” he mumbled, rolling the ball in my direction.
Leaving the ball behind me, I stood in front of him. “There’s no way my question got you that mad.”
“It’s my uncle. I stayed at Caleb’s last night.”
“Have you and your uncle ever had a good relationship?” I asked warily.
“Things change,” he said. “He just thinks I’m messing around now. And last night the fistfight didn’t help.”
“You hit your uncle?!”
“No, not my uncle.”
The look he gave me suddenly gave away what he was talking about. “You had a fight with Cedric.”
“He didn’t tell you anything?” Cedric had said the bruise on his arm was from rugby, not from fighting with Sam. “Some of my cousins were over. We were talking about shit and suddenly we’re on the ground fighting. Your boyfriend’s too prideful to let anything touch his face. He probably only got a scratch with how quick Ivan pulled me off him.”
“What the heck?”
He picked up the ball. “Don’t start.”
“Don’t start?” I exclaimed. He couldn’t be serious. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Just like Uncle Vince,” he muttered. “Thinking it’s my fault and immediately siding with the asshole. You weren’t even there.”
“I don’t have to be.”
Sam looked at me like I had said the world was going to implode. “Do you even know him?”
“I know he’s better than you,” I blurted. “I’m sure he wouldn’t start a fight, and he’s not a player who’s with a new girl every single hour of the day.”
“Why are you acting like you love the guy? News flash: you haven’t been going out for that long,” he hissed. “And a player? Does it bother you? Seeing me with other girls?”
For the hundredth time today, the image of Sam kissing that girl in the hallway came into my head. It did bother me but I wasn’t going to admit that. “No. Of course it doesn’t.”
My words were unheard. “Because Cedric has a girlfriend that makes him better than me?”
“Sam—”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
“Cedric doesn’t go around acting like you do. He doesn’t have a reputation like you do.”
Sam looked offended. “This is about my reputation?”
“Yes! You act like you’re the best thing to happen to women because you’re constantly flirting or you act like detention is your second home. Everyone says that you’re nothing but trouble and they’re probably right. I mean, look at the reason you were sent here in the first place.”
I had understood that the topic of England was a sore subject. Maybe that was why the harsh look on his face turned to hurt as he realized what I’d said. I wanted to take back the words. “That’s what you think of me?” he asked spitefully. “How ironic. He said something similar exactly last night.”
“Sam—”
“I was at the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people.” He shook his head. “That night, I didn’t set fire to any building. One of the idiots I was with did. I wasn’t involved, I told you that and yet you use it to form your opinion of me? You sound exactly like my uncle. It’s one thing to hear it from him, but from you?”
“You’ve said it yourself. Trouble follows you. And you don’t date and whenever I see you—it’s who you are, Sam.”
“It’s who I am?” Sam muttered a curse under his breath. “That’s fucked coming from you. What about you? The shit that Bonnie or whoever says about you. I heard her egging you on in the hallway that day and she’s been saying shit around school. She keeps calling you names. Do her pointless comments define you?”
“Stop it.”
“No,” he taunted, the smile on his lips anything but joyful. “I’m the guy who messes around. A bad guy. And you’re the fucking tomboy. Congratulations, you’ve succeeded in putting us into boxes we don’t necessarily want to be in. Thank you for giving a shit about what other people think of you.”
His sarcastic tone fueled my anger further and my fists clenched. “You clearly care what I think of you since you’re reacting this way.”
“Because you’re my friend,” he spat out. “I don’t want to be seen negatively in any aspect by you of all people. Clearly that’s how you view me.”
“Am I wrong?”
“Does it even matter? For fuck’s sakes, Hazel.”
“It’s not my fault that you’re playing around and getting detention—”
“I’m not playing around with anyone,” he sneered. “Any girl I’ve been with knows what they’re involved in because my intentions are clear. Let me do what I’ve been doing for a while, all right?” Sam took a deep breath, his voice quiet. “I don’t want to fight with you. I need you to know that one incident doesn’t make me the bad guy.”
He was right. It didn’t and I shouldn’t have brought anything up even in a moment of anger. “I don’t want to fight with you either,” I admitted. “And it doesn’t. None of that was my business.”
“Look, Cedric and I have never had a good relationship. I’m not even sure why but it is what it is.” He threw the ball up in the air and kicked it and we watched it bounce down the other side of the field.
“I’m sorry. I really shouldn’t have said that.”
“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have blown up at you like that,” he muttered. “I’m not up to playing anymore.” His green eyes lit up with an idea. “Let’s go somewhere.”
“You cheated!” Sam shouted. We were sitting at the edge of the cliff tops, overlooking the quarry below as Sam accused me for the hundredth time of cheating. Before we found ourselves here, he had driven us to the other side of town where there was a go-kart track, a place he went to all the time with his cousins when they were younger.
I had been there only once, for Andrew’s eighth birthday party, but going now and realizing Sam was as competitive as I was—demonstrated by his loud cursing every time I passed him—made my entire month. Especially since he wouldn’t stop talking about it. “I did beat you.”
“Once after, like, three rounds.”
Sam muttered dramatic curses that made me laugh. “A good hour of go-karting for me only to win once? You owe me lunch.”
“What? No way. If anything you owe me lunch.”
“You cheated at gaming too,” he said, recalling the day we had played video games together, resulting in a lot of yelling from the two of us. “Just admit you cheated at the game at least and we can have a clean slate between us.”
“I didn’t cheat. I’m really good.” I shoved a fry in my mouth. “You suck.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“No.” I took a picture of him with my camera. The picture sat in the gallery of my photos, beside one I had taken of him handing me my helmet earlier that day.
“Rematch,” Sam declared. “Loser buys the other lunch.”
“Might as well give it to me now.” I grabbed the sunglasses sticking out of his leather jacket pocket and put them on as I continued eating. He gave me the finger again.
A loud burp came out of my mouth before I even had time to register it was coming up. Sam looked impressed, taking a swig of his own drink and pausing only to burp atrociously loud. “How was that?”
I grinned. “That was good.”
“When you made that comment,” Sam said, “earlier. Was it bec
ause of Blair?”
“Beatrice has made stupid comments here and there. To me and Jasmine. Now it’s involving you. It’s not your fault she’s like that.”
“I’ll talk to her. Didn’t mean to get you or Jas involved. Sorry about that.”
“Thanks,” I said as we finished eating and he looked through old pictures on my phone.
“Isn’t this at the park? Where we bumped into each other?” It was a six-year-old version of me wearing shorts and a soccer jersey, my hair in a regular ponytail and a trophy in my little hand. My mom was hugging me, the two of us under a tree, smiling at the camera. Sam looked up at me then back at the picture. “I don’t know what you’ve been saying. The more I see pictures of her, the more I realize you look like her.”
“I don’t see much similarity.”
“Your hair too,” he continued. “Your hair’s really long. It’s nice.”
Trying to ignore the flush creeping up my neck, I gestured at the picture. “Justin and I would go to that park almost every summer. He’d force me to play basketball with him when his friends couldn’t.”
“You’re tall,” Sam commented, even though he stood a few inches above me.
“Yet I can’t play basketball to save my life. I met you around there too.”
“A good thing, right?” He looked at me warily.
“Definitely.” The prior argument we had wasn’t going to break our friendship. I hoped nothing would.
13
It’s Victoria Marie
I sat in school two days later, waiting for the bell to ring to signal the end of physics class. Last night, Cedric and I double-dated with Andrew and Jasmine at the movies.
The suggestion came from Cedric, and my friends were eager to join. Cedric loved movie theaters. However, for me, movies were better suited to home, where I’d lie down on my couch and react to what was on my TV with the person next to me. Cedric attempting to teach me the ropes of rugby or simply going out for food gained more of my interest than watching a movie surrounded by people. There was no commentary I could make without being shushed by someone nearby. He seemed excited about it, though, and even though it wasn’t my favorite thing to do, I encouraged his plan.
The night had progressed and I grew restless, holding back my comments about how dull the movie was. Jasmine seemed to agree, but the two of us were entertained by how Andrew and Cedric never took their eyes off the screen. Suddenly, my phone had buzzed with a notification from the group chat Caleb had thrown me into with Sam.
C: I have something to discuss
Me: Oh no
S: Hide your kids and pets, Caleb has another stupid theory
C: I honestly think the world will end in six years
Me: Dude
C: Mace, if it came down to you, me, and Sam and having to create a new human race, who would you choose?
Me: Neither
C: I believe the correct choice is me
S: Why would someone pick you over me?
“Macy!” I flinched at the sound of Jasmine’s voice. Everyone else had already started filing out. The bell had rung. I gathered my things and as we walked into the hallway, we noticed Caleb and Sam talking. “Weren’t you texting him last night?”
“Caleb was in the conversation. It wasn’t just us.” She didn’t look convinced as we continued walking down the hallway.
After school, Cedric’s larger hand tugged mine as we headed inside his house. His mom sat in the kitchen, and Cedric grabbed a Gatorade from the fridge as we greeted her.
“Hi, honey.” Her eyes fell on me behind the reading glasses she was wearing. “Hello, Macy.”
Cedric said, “We’re going to head to my room.”
“Wait, Macy.” She stopped him from exiting the room and turned to me. “It’s come to my attention that Sam has been spending time with you lately. I understand you two are friends.”
“We are. I hope that’s not an issue.” Next to me, Cedric bristled.
“Of course not. He talks about you and the rest of your friend group a lot. I’m happy to see him happy here.”
Ivan entered the room, stopping in front of his mom. “Phillip’s complaining about his outfit again.”
“Again?” Liz sounded exasperated. “Cedric, can you get Phillip to settle down? You did it last time.”
“I got it,” Cedric agreed. “I’ll be back.” He followed his mom out of the room.
Ivan turned to me, reaching up to the cabinet and grabbing a couple of granola bars. He tossed one to me and I caught it with ease, mumbling a thanks as I sat down on a chair. “What outfit?”
“Phillip got these new shorts for gymnastics and he’s decided he doesn’t like them again.” He leaned against the fridge. “How long have you and Ced been together?”
“A few weeks. Not long,” I said.
As I finished my granola bar, Ivan asked, “Did he tell you about the fight between him and Sam?”
“Sam told me.”
“That means he probably told you he and my dad had a little spat after that. Their relationship is complicated.”
“Has it always been like that?”
“No, not always.”
Phillip entered the room, picking at his gymnastics uniform. Another Cahill followed him. Christian. He pointed at me. “You were at Phil’s party but I think I know you from somewhere else.”
Christian stared at me a moment longer, and Ivan took that opportunity to smack his younger cousin upside the head. “Stop staring at her, dumbass.”
Christian rubbed the back of his head with one hand. “You’re Justin’s sister. We play ball sometimes at the rec center.”
That explained why he had looked familiar that day. Ivan turned to me. “And if you’re looking for Sam, he will not be here tonight.”
“What?” Phillip voiced my confusion. “Where is he?”
“Caleb’s. Dad and Sam had another fight,” Ivan said.
Worry overcame me and I pulled my phone out of my pocket, texting Sam to make sure he was okay as Phillip groaned. “Again? Did you hear it this time?”
Ivan shrugged. “Probably some nuisance he’s caused. After the last fight they had? He was bound to get on Dad’s nerves somehow.”
Cedric appeared. “What are we talking about?”
“Sam,” Phillip said.
Cedric frowned, obtaining a granola bar for himself and asked me, “My room?”
“Have fun, kids,” Ivan teased.
“Shut up,” I said, and the boys laughed as we exited the room. “You and Sam had a fight the other night?”
“Ivan told you?”
“Sam did.” Cedric pushed the door open when we reached his room, then walked over to his closet to retrieve something. “You said the bruise was from rugby.”
“It’s fine,” he assured me. “What happens between me and my cousin isn’t as big of a deal as you think it is.”
When my phone buzzed in my pocket, I took it out, reading Sam’s response.
Jerk: Just got out of detention, got into a little one on one argument with a teacher who marked my test wrong. I may have overreacted
Me: Overreacted how and with which teacher?
He replied instantly.
Jerk: Mr. Oliver
The same teacher who had given me detention.
Jerk: May have broken his favorite pencils he keeps on his desk. Bought him a new set but he still gave me detention
Jerk: I think detention would have been better with you there
The message surprised me. Sam flirted with me in an arrogant fashion but this time it sounded sincere. It probably wasn’t even flirting.
Cedric finally located what he was looking for, pulling a thick blanket from the closet. “Found it.” I reached out for the blanket, glad we shared the mentality that movies or T
V shows were meant to be watched surrounded by comfort. He handed the blanket to me as he went over to his bed to retrieve pillows. I should take you to the music room after the movie.”
Wrapping it around myself as I made my way over to a pile of video games on his desk. “I finally get to see your drumming skills?” I recognized the game on top. “You good at this?”
“Kind of. Have you played?”
Constantly. “Yeah.”
“Really?” he said. “I didn’t think many girls played it.”
His assumption made me frown but I held the case up. “After the movie you’ll see.”
I sat next to him as he decided on a movie for us. How he didn’t seem bothered by him and Sam’s relationship confused me. While he remained as if the fight didn’t even happen, Sam’s actions that day on the soccer field proved something different. I texted Sam.
Me: You okay though?
Jerk: I’m fine. I’ll see you soon
Andrew, Austin, and I passed the ball around after everyone on the team had left practice at the rec center the following day. Andrew took the ball when Austin attempted to pass it to me. “Dude.” I playfully pushed Andrew.
“Foul.”
“Foul,” I mimicked, pushing Andrew again and grabbing hold of the soccer ball. Sam came over in his soccer gear and took the ball from my hands.
“Hey, man.” Austin acknowledged Sam. “Always wondered why I saw you often.”
Sam passed the ball to me. “Hazel could use the extra practice.”
“That’s rude,” I chided, knowing he was joking. For the next hour we played two-on-two with ease and the boys were a little surprised at Sam’s natural abilities. Austin’s groan rang through the field as Sam scored again, and he took a seat where he was. We moved over to Austin, taking our seats with the ball between us.
Andrew flicked through his phone, putting it away as the doors opened and Jasmine skipped in our direction. She tackled me in a hug from behind before sitting between Andrew and me. “How was practice?”
“Brutal,” I answered. “Coach made us—”
“Macy Marie Victoria Anderson.”
“It’s Victoria Marie.”