by Amanda Perry
After a pause, the sound echoes a bit, and it’s clear he put Cassie on speaker for everyone to hear.
Caleb speaks into the phone before Cassie can say anything, “Did you find her? Where is she? Where are you?”
Cassie remains quiet for a long stretch before she explodes. “How dare you!”
I yelp in surprise but quickly cover my mouth.
“What the hell?” Jaxon jumps in nervously. “Cassie, what’s going on?”
“Shut up, Jaxon,” she demands, getting her wish as he goes silent.
“Mark, what did Riley say when you told her she was going to school?” she spits with venom.
“Uh…” He pauses as if trying to remember.
“Hmm.” She nods as if she expected his answer. “Leanne, what was her argument? You know, the reason you guys snapped at her.”
“Well…” Leanne mutters.
“She didn’t have one!” Cassie screams so loud I cover my ears and still hear her clearly. “Not one of you idiots knows what she had to say about school, because not one of you bothered to ask her. You just demanded she listen to what you wanted, what you thought was best. She was ignored her entire fucking life, and you four decided she didn’t deserve to be heard. We were told to listen to her, but I guess that doesn’t matter, does it? We shouldn’t have even needed to be told. She listens to us, yet we can’t let her speak her mind for once?”
“Cassie, you know how important—” my dad starts, his tone hardening.
Cassie shuts him down quickly. “She already graduated, you assholes.”
Complete silence greets us from the other end. I simply sit in shock, waiting for someone to come through the door and murder me for telling Cassie about the conversation and for running away.
“I didn’t know,” Caleb breathes.
“Of course, you didn’t know. You thought she was acting like ‘a bratty kid’ as Jaxon put it,” Cassie growls. “She’s terrified of you guys, of all of us.”
I can tell she’s trying to tone her voice down, though just barely.
“You snapped at her, Mark, simply because she wanted to explain something to you. Of course, she’s going to assume you’re angry and want to hurt her. She didn’t even get the opportunity to say a single thing to any of you and none of you cared. You four are seriously unbelievable, especially after the visit we got last night. How could you?”
“Cassie,” Jaxon pleads. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”
“Don’t you sweetheart me, Jaxon!” she yells. “I don’t want to hear it, and I’m really not the one you should be saying sorry to. You can all stay the hell away from her for a while. Find another place to sleep tonight, Caleb. We’ll be in your room, and you’re not welcome. I hope you all have a wonderful night thinking about how badly you all screwed up, again.”
With that, she ends the call, tosses her phone onto the bed behind her, and turns to me. “We’re having a girls’ night, Ri. No idiots allowed.”
Chapter 6
I sit in shock, my wide eyes on Cassie as she hops off the bed and putters around the room. She gathers her bathroom items and throws them into her suitcase before she zips it shut. “Let’s head to your room. You’ll probably be more comfortable there.”
Still in a daze, I follow Cassie to my room without a word. Once inside, she strolls into the living area and scoops up the remote. She glances around, her gaze stopping on me, and she arches a brow in question. She waves me over to the couch, patting the cushion next to her. I slowly make my way to her and lower myself.
“Th-th-they’re going t-t-to be f-f-furious,” I whisper, finally coming back to reality.
Her phone rings loudly in her pocket, and I jump as if it might attack. Cassie huffs while she pulls her phone from her pocket. She glances at the screen for a second, then presses the red decline button.
“First off, they’re not going to be mad. They’re probably already trying to think of ways to apologize to you. Second, who cares if they are pissed? They’ll get over it. They were wrong to treat you the way they did. They know it, I know it, and you know it. Now, they can sit and stew for a while.”
I bite my lip, considering my options. I could ignore them, stay with Cassie tonight, and deal with the consequences in the morning. She thinks they’re not upset with me, but I know anger when I see and hear it. My father was irate with me.
Every fiber of my being screams at me to fix things with him, beg for his forgiveness and accept his reprimand, whatever it may be. “M-m-maybe I sh-should t-t-talk to them?”
“Not a chance.” Cassie snorts and shakes her head. “Ri, you need to stand up for yourself. You can’t let people—especially your family—walk all over you and treat you like you don’t matter. Your thoughts, your feelings, and your opinions matter just as much as theirs.”
“I d-d-don’t want to u-u-upset anyone.” I drop my head in shame. “I’m s-s-sorry.” Cassie may be disappointed with me now, too, and I’m not sure how to fix it.
“Stop it!” Cassie’s harsh tone causes my head to snap up. “It’s okay to upset people, Riley. People get mad, they disagree, argue, and yell. It’s normal for any relationship. Mothers and daughters. Husbands and wives. Brothers and sisters. Best friends. It’s okay to be mad and disagree with someone. It’s okay to tell them they need to shut up and listen to you when you have something to say. It’s never okay to allow someone to hurt you or belittle you for any reason. That’s abuse, Ri, and it’s not okay.”
Her rationalization leaves me speechless. Cassie takes my hand and hugs me to her side. “If you told me you hated my favorite shirt, I’d completely disagree with you and give you a hundred reasons why you’re wrong. But I would never stop loving you, and I would never hurt you, physically or emotionally.”
“R-r-really?” I sniff, swiping at the sudden onslaught of tears.
Cassie chuckles and squeezes me. “Yes, really.” She rests her head on my shoulder and pulls in a few deep breaths. “It’s the same with all of us, Ri. I’m pissed as hell at Jaxon right now for how he treated you and what he said to you without a single question as to what you were thinking. I’m just as angry with Mark, Leanne, and my stupid brother. But that doesn’t mean I don’t love them anymore. Jaxon knows I’m mad, he knows I want to put itching powder in his socks for his stupidity, but he also knows I love him more than anything in this world, and I’d never hurt him, no matter how mad I am.”
“Wh-what if m-m-my father h-h-hates me?” Fear echoes in my hushed question. “He’s the o-o-only family I h-h-have. If he h-h-hates me, I have n-n-no place else t-t-to go.”
“He doesn’t hate you.” She lifts her head from my shoulder. “He would never hate you, no matter what you did. But he also isn’t the only family you have, Ri.”
“H-h-he isn’t?” According to social services, I had no other relatives available to take me in until I turn eighteen. With my mother dead, if my father decides he doesn’t want me, I have no other option but to go to foster care for the next four months.
“No, he isn’t,” she repeats. “You have me, Jaxon, Leanne, and Caleb. We’re your family, too. I can’t speak for all of us, but I’m pretty sure they’d agree with me on this. I’ll never leave or shun you for speaking your mind and having your own thoughts and opinions.”
Cassie goes quiet, allowing me to process her promise. She said she can’t speak for the others, but maybe she’s right. Maybe they wouldn’t leave me, either. At least for the moment, I believe Cassie wouldn’t throw me to the side even if I upset her. Only time will tell if she’s right about the others, though. The whole ordeal proves the gods and goddesses were right about trust taking time and a lot of effort. Even if they don’t kill me for tonight, it’ll take a long time for me to think the way Cassie does.
I have to wonder if the way Leanne and my dad reacted at lunch, and even Jaxon and Caleb later on, was because of a lack of trust in me. They might not trust me to follow all the rules and do the right thing yet. It’s only fair they have some ambiv
alence about me when I have plenty with them. I know I’d never intentionally upset them or break a rule, but they don’t know that for sure yet. Just as their actions will either prove or disprove Cassie’s thoughts, mine will prove or disprove my own.
It isn’t long before Cassie can’t sit still anymore. She flutters around the room, searching for the room service menu. It doesn’t take her more than five minutes, and she’s on the phone placing an order for just about every kind of junk food and dessert they have. Every time she adds an item, my eyes grow wider. She watches me with a mischievous grin the whole time.
“Please be sure to charge it to the room,” she adds before she hangs up.
My jaw drops to the floor. “Isn’t that D-D-Dad’s card?”
“Yes.” She chuckles. “He’s buying us dinner tonight.”
“I think he’s b-b-buying the whole h-h-hotel dinner,” I mutter under my breath. When we first checked in, Dad told us to order food if we were hungry. I don’t think he meant order the entire menu, though.
After she sits back down on the couch, Cassie watches me thoughtfully, her index finger on her chin. “You’re calming down, I think.”
Her change in subject throws me. “Huh?”
“Your stutter is easing up,” she points out, bringing heat to my cheeks. “Don’t be embarrassed, Ri, it’s part of who you are. I love who you are, no matter what. But, since you’ve had time to calm your fears from earlier, you’re able to talk to me easier. It’s just an observation.”
“It’s s-s-something that happens when I’m n-n-nervous.” I duck my head to hide my bright cheeks. “S-S-Samael hated it. H-h-he told me I sound l-l-like an idiot, and if I c-c-couldn’t talk right, then I shouldn’t t-t-talk at all.”
“This Samael prick needs a serious lesson in manners,” she growls. “I’d like to teach him that lesson. Maybe we can throw him into a pool and put a lid over it. We could try to find some piranhas or sharks to add, too. I’m sure he’d love to go for a swim.”
She giggles when she catches the shock on my face. “I’m only kind of kidding, Ri. We need to get rid of him so he doesn’t hurt you, but I don’t think anyone will let me buy sharks to do it. Anyway, enough about him, let’s get in our pajamas and watch something fun.”
Cassie thought ahead and brought a pair of her pajamas. While she changes, I take a quick shower and dress in one of Caleb’s shirts. Even though he upset me, I miss him fiercely. The smell of him still lingers on his shirt, which comforts me.
When I finish dressing, I follow the sounds of the television into the living room and find Cassie cross-legged on the couch with a coffee table full of food in front of her. All different types of snacks and sweets take up every inch of the table.
She spots me frozen in awe and grins. “Room service is amazing, don’t you think? This is going to be awesome! Lucky for us, Caleb and Jaxon weren’t hanging around outside the door when they delivered. I half-expected them to be, honestly. Jaxon probably would have tried to convince me to let him in with his sex-pertise. That man is insatiable.” She pauses, then shrugs and giggles. “Then again, so am I.”
My face heats up about a thousand degrees, and my eyes widen. “Sexper— what?”
“You know, his expertise on sex?” She raises a brow.
“Um.” I look away. Of course, I understand what she means by expertise on sex, but her candidness isn’t something I’m used to. “O-o-okay then.”
She ignores my embarrassment and pats the couch cushion next to her. “Come eat junk food with me, we’re going to watch chick-flicks all night and stuff ourselves until we can’t move.”
While shuffling over to the couch, I can’t stop the giggles that escape at her enthusiasm. She digs through the food-filled table until she finds the remote, then grabs a plate with cheesecake on it, and scrolls through the movie selections. When she reaches a movie where a man and a woman are standing in an elevator, she stops. “Oh! I read these books, but I never saw the movies. It looks like it’s close to the beginning. Want to watch it?”
I shrug and nod, unsure what type of movie it is, but glad Cassie said we would watch a chick-flick instead of a horror movie. I don’t do well with horror. Two seconds into the movie, before I can even pick my treat from the vast selection on the table, the male actor says, “Fuck the paperwork,” and starts kissing the female actress. I blush fifty shades of red and turn away, as I do with all intimate scenes in movies.
Before I turn back to the screen, the words of the actor register, and I pause. Why would they need paperwork to kiss? I know it isn’t really a law, so the purpose of it in the movie piques my interest.
“Why do they need p-p-paperwork to kiss?” The question pours out before I can stop it.
Cassie blinks at me a few times. It looks like she’s trying really hard not to laugh. “Riley, please tell me you’re joking.”
I simply shake my head, wishing I could pull the question back and pretend I never thought of it. We never had a television when I was growing up because of the cost, and my mother monitored the books I read. Most of the movies I’ve been introduced to lately have been comedies. Whatever book-turned-movie this is, I’ve never heard of it before, but it must be popular.
“Ri.” Cassie brings my attention back to her. “You’re telling me you’ve never heard of Fifty Shades?”
My brow scrunches in confusion. “F-f-fifty shades?”
“Oh, boy.” She pauses the TV and turns her body toward me. “Okay, I should have realized you wouldn’t know this one yet. Let me explain this movie to you before we watch it.”
I nod and listen intently as she explains what the books—and movies—are about. My jaw lowers with every word spoken until it drops to the floor completely.
“So, that’s what the paperwork is for.” She shrugs as if it’s no big deal. “I’ll lend you the books so you can read them. I’m sure Caleb would love that,” she murmurs under her breath, but I hear her anyway.
“I don’t know about r-r-reading that.” I settle back onto the couch and pick up a chocolate bar. “I don’t want to learn that stuff from a book.”
“Learn? Do you know anything about sex?” Concern laces her tone.
“I know the m-m-mechanics,” I admit quietly. “I wasn’t allowed to go to s-s-sex-ed classes in school. My mother didn’t want me to talk to b-b-boys or know anything about them. I did overhear some of the kids talking about how things w-w-work after they took the class, though. So, I know that p-p-part.”
“Okay, then maybe we shouldn’t start off with Christian,” she states.
“Who?”
“Maybe we should start you off watching Look Who’s Talking instead,” she muses, more to herself than to me, I think.
“What’s that one about?” I ask a little skeptical. If it’s as in-depth as the first one, I may want to skip it.
“Never mind, we’re going to watch Pitch Perfect. That’s a safe movie.” She chuckles and switches to a different movie. “I’ll answer your sex questions as they come up, though. Just come to me if you don’t understand something, and I’ll explain it. It is pretty easy once you get the hang of it.” She laughs at her own joke and my blush.
For the next few hours, we watch a group of girls sing their hearts out, and Cassie convinces me to open up about some of my questions. Mostly, I want to know about the butterflies, and the way Caleb’s eyes darken all the time. She promises it’s all normal, and I relax with the knowledge I’m not crazy or broken.
“Maybe we should get you on the pill,” Cassie suggests midway through the movie. She glances at me when I turn her way. “If you want to, I mean… Don’t feel pressured, Ri. It’s only a suggestion.”
“I’m not having…” I pause, unable to finish the sentence. “We aren’t doing that, Cassie.”
She snorts. “I know, you made that clear earlier. But one day you will, or I assume you will, and you don’t want to worry about birth control after the act. It’s just an idea, though. If you wan
t to, I’ll take you to the doctor or even Leanne would take you. If not, then pretend I never said anything.”
I mull over her suggestion silently for a while. It would make sense to take precautions now rather than when it’s too late. I don’t plan to have sex any time soon, but I know things happen. The kids at school constantly talked about random hook-ups they had and how it just happened. I don’t want to be in that kind of situation. My pull toward Caleb grows daily, and since the Blessing, it physically hurts to be away from him. I can only imagine how deep my feelings for him will grow over the next few weeks. Leanne said newly Blessed soul mates are much more sensitive with each other.
“Can we go see the doctor when we get back, but without Dad and Leanne knowing?” I whisper, almost too low for even myself to hear.
Cassie freezes for a second beside me, then collects herself and shrugs nonchalantly. “Yeah, sure. I’ll make you an appointment. Leanne and Mark wouldn’t freak out on you for this, though. I get not wanting to talk to your dad about it, and if you really don’t want Leanne to know, I’ll respect that, but consider telling her. It would be one more female for you to talk to if you need to.”
I appreciate her not making a big deal about it. She’s the first person I’ve ever talked to about these types of things, and it’s awkward for me. I trust Cassie with this, though, and I’m glad she brought it up. It saves me the stress of wondering if she’ll willingly talk about it with me. I know I’m not ready to open up this much to Leanne, though, but maybe one day.
Near the end of our movie, there’s a knock at the door. Cassie runs to answer it before I even stand up. When I catch up to her, she has the door open while she grins like the Cheshire cat.
“What’s going on?” I lean around the door only to watch the person who knocked walk away. Cassie turns toward me with a giant bouquet of lilies in her hands, already in an elegant purple vase. “Who are those from?”
She shrugs and kicks the door closed with her foot. We shuffle into the kitchenette where she sets the full vase down on the counter, then plucks a card sticking out of the top. “Let’s find out.”