by Alexia Adams
No other eight words could have doused her ardor as quickly.
She sank to the floor. Her back against the wall was the only thing keeping her upright. Her brain was still befuddled and couldn’t send the necessary messages to her legs to carry her to her bedroom. Not that she’d be able to sleep anyway. She may never sleep again until he finished what he started.
This was not what she’d expected. Sure, the passion was more than anything she’d ever known, but she’d been quasi-prepared for that. It was the need for him. Not just for his body. For all of him. Every single piece of his body, heart, mind, and soul. She craved it all.
Eventually, she picked herself up off the floor and made her way back to her room. Her bed was too big, too lonely to even contemplate a return there. Instead she sat on the round armchair and pulled her guitar into her lap. The familiar pose soothed her soul as her fingers picked out chords at random, stringing sounds together that reflected the chaos of her heart.
Had she made a huge mistake in trying to reignite the flame between her and Eduardo?
She needed to tread carefully. Love for him still lingered in her heart. But she’d lost a lot of people she loved recently; she was emotionally bereft. And at a low point in her career. Add in an intense attraction that had never died, and she could so easily fall back to into the submissive girlfriend role. That wouldn’t do. Not only would it be cheating herself, it would be unfair to Eduardo too. He deserved a strong woman who could stand on her own and support him in times of difficulty. She still wanted him to make love to her—Dios, she wanted him, especially after that kiss—but anything more than that would have to wait until she was at a better place in her life.
She loved being Angel, sharing her talent with the world, helping people cope with their own emotional turmoil, but she was realizing she also loved being Anna. How long had it been since she’d played with a child as she’d done with Timo the other day? How long since she’d worn clothes in bright, fun colors that didn’t come with a designer name attached? How long since she’d laughed until she snorted? Angel never snort-laughed.
That was going to change. Starting now. She’d find a balance between her life and her career. Then go after everything she wanted.
That they did teach in diva school.
***
Not being able to pound his body into submission was damned annoying. Eduardo did his lower body workout, but the lunges weren’t cutting it to dampen his ardor. What the hell had he been thinking, kissing Anna that way? He hadn’t been thinking at all. The hallway incident had been entirely hormonal, a lust-hazed action-adventure of epic proportions. Incredible. And anything but wise.
No jury of his peers would convict him of taking things too far too fast when faced with a partially clad woman who held his heart in her clenched fist and demanded that he kiss her. Hell, she’d been with him every step of the way.
The problem was his lack of self-control. It had all been too amazing, too scorching, too … emotional. Her response, her touch, her taste had overwhelmed him until he’d been reduced to a man whose sole purpose was to give pleasure. And receive it. Dios, she’d been so hot.
Maybe he shouldn’t have run his fingers along her inner thigh or stroked between her legs. Even through the layers of fabric, her heat had enticed him to strip the shorts from her body and plunge into her wetness. He’d been stopped only by the flashing reminder that she was a virgin and her first time should be more than a pounding against the wall in his friend’s hallway.
Lust flamed again within him. This was going to be a hell of a few days if he could neither act on the desire nor alleviate it with exercise. He should stay away from her. Not that that was an option. She wanted the boyfriend experience. Maybe this morning’s demonstration showed he wasn’t boyfriend material.
He tried to recall his vow to her grandmother. It had kept him in check in the past. Unfortunately, he was no longer dealing with a teenage girl on the cusp of womanhood. Anna was one-hundred-percent temptress.
The only benefit from the early morning escapade was that his heart rate had been accelerated enough that he didn’t need to do a warm-up before exercising. And by the time he’d hit the gym, the drugs were gone from his system.
Raul joined him a few minutes later. If he noticed his boss’s rather desperate demeanor, he said nothing.
Eduardo caught Raul’s gaze. “It wasn’t your past catching up with you in BA. The gang says as long as you stay out of their business, they’ll leave you alone.”
“I’m glad it wasn’t because of me. I was trying to figure out how I’d pay you back for your car.”
“Insurance will do that. There was something else I wanted to ask. How would you feel about relocating here to Mendoza?”
A smile lit the other man’s face. “You’re moving here? Timo loves seeing the mountains and all the green fields. Of course, he’s going to be disappointed that we won’t be living in a grand place like this, but I think the change will do him good. I swear he’s already grown an inch in the few days we’ve been here. But that could be all the treats the cook is feeding him.”
“No, I’m not moving. But I know Tiago is looking for a warehouse manager. I could recommend you. He has great plans for the winery. It could be a stepping-stone to an interesting career for you.”
The smile faded from Raul’s eyes. “I have no experience.”
“I wouldn’t say that. You ran a very efficient product distribution network for the cartel. This job would be similar, just more legal.”
“But you…”
Eduardo put his hand on the big man’s shoulder. “Amigo, we both know I don’t really need a driver. And that you are capable of so much more. I would hate for you to look back on your life in ten years and feel you’ve wasted it behind the wheel.” Eduardo read reluctant acknowledgment in the other man’s eyes. But he couldn’t limit his friend’s potential because Raul felt indebted. “Besides, I don’t currently have a car for you to drive. Mine got blown up, if you recall.”
“I don’t know…”
“Just think about it. We still have to wrap up the custody case. But with what I’ve been able to uncover about your ex-wife, I’m pretty sure you’ll be granted full custody. And if we can tell the judge you have a good job and a healthy environment for Timo here in Mendoza, that will also go in your favor. Tiago will be home on Sunday. Meet with him and see if you like the sound of the job, and if you could work with him.”
There was a glassiness in Raul’s eyes. Eduardo moved over to the rack to pull off a couple of dumbbells, giving his friend a chance to get his emotions under control. Eduardo attempted a bicep curl but stopped when the skin across his back protested. He did not want to risk a delay in recovery if it meant he’d have to wait longer to make love to Anna.
“Why?” Raul asked. His voice held a hint of a quaver, and he cleared it. “Why are you doing all this for me?”
Eduardo looked him in the eye. “Because my life could have easily turned out just like yours. I was headed into a life of crime. Then I met Anna.”
She’d saved him. And then nearly destroyed him.
Raul held a twenty-five-kilogram weight but didn’t slip it on the bar. “About her. I know it’s not my place…”
“You’re my friend, Raul. As long as you don’t disparage her, say what you want.” Eduardo picked up the other twenty-five-kilogram disc, ready to slip it onto the other end of the weightlifting bar. At least he could spot for his friend.
Raul’s eyes were wide. “I’d never say anything bad about her. She’s so wonderful with Timo, and kind to me too. She insisted I call her Anna. Anyway, I was thinking… You have history with her.” Raul held up his hand as Eduardo opened his mouth again. “I don’t want to know what happened, but can I give you some advice?”
“If you feel you need to.” Dios. Everyone was a relationship expert these days.
“When you look at her, all you’re remembering is the bad stuff, the way it ended. Yo
u just told me she saved you. Look at the good stuff, how you felt when you were together, how she made you a better man. I hated my ex after she left. But without her, I wouldn’t have Timo. And he’s everything to me. So, yeah, maybe I don’t hate her completely. Just … give Anna a chance.”
Eduardo had felt amazing when Anna had been in his life. Since then, he’d achieved great success. But he’d never been as happy.
Raul had a point.
Chapter Nine
Anna cradled the warm mug of coffee in her hands. Eduardo sat across from her, spreading jam on a scone. He’d already consumed all the tostadas, and this was his third scone. Then again, he had missed dinner last night. Or he’d worked up an appetite in the gym. His long sleep had done wonders as well. He not only looked healthier, but he also seemed more at peace with himself and her—more like the Eduardo she used to know.
“What do you want to know about my mother?” she asked.
His gaze flickered to hers, and for once there was a softness in his eyes when they roamed her face. Had their passionate encounter in the hallway actually burned away some of his animosity?
“Have you talked to her recently?”
“No. I sent her several messages when Abuela died, but she didn’t respond. We’re … not on speaking terms right now. We had a huge fight when I told her I was getting married.” The hate-filled conversation still played back in Anna’s mind whenever she was tempted to heal the breach with her only living relative.
“She didn’t like Simon?”
“She liked him just fine when he was my music manager.”
“Maybe she was worried about the age difference between you?”
“No, I asked. According to her I was ‘an ungrateful bitch who was trying to cut her off now that I was finally proving useful in life.’ Basically, she knew if I married Simon she’d no longer control my life or career. She wanted to be the one to make decisions about what I wore, where I ate, who I was seen with, that sort of thing. I wanted to grow as an artist and a person. I told her I wanted her to be my mother, my personal support, not my caretaker. Evidently, that wasn’t enough for her. So now I pay her forty grand a month to stay out of my life.”
“Did she know Simon was dying when you wed?”
“No. We told no one. And I didn’t want her to think that once Simon passed she’d be back in charge of me.”
He nodded. “You haven’t heard from her at all since your engagement was announced?”
“No. She didn’t come to the wedding or the funeral, or … anything.” He reached across and pulled her fingers from the factura she’d been shredding. “Anna, there’s no easy way to say this. Is your mother the main beneficiary in your will?”
She clutched his fingers before he could withdraw them. “You think she’s behind these incidents?” A chill swept through her. Could her mother hate her so much she wanted her dead?
“It’s just one line of inquiry we’re investigating. We need to look at everyone’s motives. What would she gain if you were … killed?” The last word seemed hard for him to even say.
“She’d get about ten percent of my estate. The rest goes to various charities. I made a new will after I married Simon, but I felt I had to leave her something. Why, I don’t know. Sentimentality, I guess.” She took a long sip of her coffee, hoping the warm liquid would dissolve the lump she could feel forming in her throat.
“Ten percent is still a large sum,” Eduardo said, almost to himself. “About fifteen million?”
“Something like that. I don’t actually keep tabs on how much I’m worth. I have an accounting firm that does that.”
“Anna, you shouldn’t just blindly trust people.”
She picked a few flakes of pastry off the bright maxi-dress she wore. “I know.” The only person she could truly trust now sat across from her. “What about my stepfather? I’ve only met him twice. Maybe he’s put her up to this.”
“According to my sources, your mother and her husband are no longer together. He moved out of the marital home eight months ago and is living in Florida. He’s not under suspicion right now. Should he be?”
Anna pictured the slightly balding, golf-obsessed man her mother had surprisingly introduced as her stepfather the week before Anna had announced her engagement. “I doubt it. He seemed like a nice enough guy. But I had no idea my mother’s marriage was in trouble. Maybe that’s why she hasn’t contacted me. I’ll try to call her again this afternoon.”
“Remember, don’t tell her where you are.”
“I won’t.”
His fingers tightened on hers, just enough to prepare her for his next words. “Also, be prepared for a request for money. I’m told she’s amassed huge debts.”
Mierda. When they’d lived in Boca, $40,000 US a year would have kept all three of them fed, clothed, and sheltered. How could her mother go through that monthly? Anna rarely spent that much, and she had a diva image to live up to. “I won’t promise her anything until I know what’s happening.”
He nodded and went back to devouring his breakfast.
“How did you do it?” she asked after a long silence.
His gaze swung back to hers, his dark eyes troubled. “Do what?”
“Cope, after your papa and abuela died? I know you were never close to them. Obviously, I can’t rely on my mother. I feel like I’m in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. It’s calm seas now, but there are clouds gathering on the horizon. Abuela was always my harbor. Even when I was abroad, she was just a phone call or videoconference away. I’m not sure how I’m going to face things without her in my corner.”
That got him out of his chair to pull her into his arms.
“It’s still raw and new, Anna. Give yourself time. You’ll find your anchor. And you have great inner strength; I know that. As for losing my father and grandmother, their passings were a relief, as bad as that sounds. Neither were happy in life. I hope they’ve finally found peace.”
She couldn’t be positive, but she was pretty sure his lips grazed the top of her head. It wasn’t quite the kiss she wanted, but it would do for now.
“Do you ever think of your mother? Wonder what she’s doing now?”
“No.” There was a sharp edge to his voice although the hand running up and down her back remained gentle. “When I was really little, I used to dream of her coming back for me and taking me somewhere nice, somewhere like this. By the time I was eleven I hated her and swore that if she did return, I wouldn’t even speak to her.”
“Has she tried to contact you now that you’re Buenos Aires’s most eligible bachelor?”
He leaned back, and a little snort-laugh escaped her. His cheeks were flushed. Raul was right—it was fun to tease Eduardo about the unwanted title. His eyes soon turned serious, though.
“She’s dead. I googled her name after a fight with my papa when I was a fourteen. According to a newspaper report, she died of a drug overdose on a yacht about eighteen months after she left. I also found her death certificate among my father’s papers after he passed.”
“All those years and your father never told you your mother was dead?”
“No. What was the point? She was gone either way.”
“Do you think that if she hadn’t died, maybe she would have come back for you?”
He hauled in a deep breath, his chest expanding against her, pushing her farther away. She was careful not to touch his back but tightened her arms around his waist. “I was part of the life she didn’t want. She chose to leave me.”
As did you. The unspoken words sliced through her. Could they ever recover from her earlier desertion? Should she even keep trying? Her body, still pressed against his, shouted a resounding yes. Her heart, mind, and soul were a little more cautious.
His warmth, his strength, soothed some of her inner turmoil. She searched for a way to keep the conversation going, to keep hold of him for just a few minutes more. “When I give concerts in Scandinavia, I often wonder if my father is in the
audience, maybe with his teen daughter, thinking I look vaguely familiar.”
“No one has tried to contact you, claiming you’re his child? Damn, that’s one avenue we haven’t checked.”
“Lots of men have written saying they’re my father. But I’ve never responded. My team doesn’t even show me the correspondence anymore. A true father is someone who kisses their child good night and lifts them up after they’ve fallen. Whoever supplied the sperm to form me isn’t really my dad.”
“I agree. But now that you feel all alone, you don’t want to see if you can find him?”
“Not really. I’d always wonder if he’d only claim me because of my fame. Do you think that says something about me? Am I selfish?”
“You are never selfish for wanting to be loved for who you are, not what you have.”
Said by a man who’d only ever had love briefly. From her.
***
“I feel like one of the servants in Downton Abbey waiting for the earl and countess to return from a trip,” Anna said. “Except we’re standing in the foyer and not outside.”
Eduardo’s raised eyebrows asked if she’d been drinking, but his mouth said, “Downton Abbey?”
Now it was her turn to wonder what planet he lived on. “Don’t tell me you’ve never heard of it.”
“Okay, I won’t. Even though I haven’t.”
“I know what we’re doing next rainy day—a Downton Abbey marathon.”
His reply was a sexy smile that kick-started her ovaries. “If it involves you, me, a sofa, a soft blanket, and relative darkness, I’m in. Until then, what would these Downton Abbey servants be doing while waiting for their lord and lady to return? Please say they’d be kissing.”
“Unlikely, but maybe surreptitiously holding hands. And definitely gossiping.”
She slipped her palm into his. It was slightly ridiculous, waiting here for the homeowners to return. But when the guard had called up from the gate to say they were on their way, both she and Eduardo had naturally gravitated towards the front door, ready to greet them when they arrived.