“No. I mean, yes, he did, but I don’t care about him. It’s . . .”
I bend my head to try and get her to look at me. “What?”
She plays with a button on my chest and I temporarily forget that I’ve wanted to get out of this stiff shirt since the moment I put it on. “That photo you posted yesterday . . .”
I think back to the photo. We’d shot it a few days earlier. She’d dropped a glass in the kitchen in the middle of the night while getting water. I found her on her hands and knees cleaning it up. “You’ll cut yourself,” I’d said, pulling her up by her bicep. “Leave it. I’ll get it in the morning.”
I’d turned out the light, and the glare of a nearly full moon silhouetted her, her red slip the only color in the dark. She’d started to apologize, but I’d cut her off to get my camera. I’d slid down the strap of her negligee, positioned her sleep-disheveled hair over her shoulders, and shot her in the dark. Since we were apart yesterday, I’d posted it without her permission, but her face was shadowed. She hadn’t told me not to as she’d watched me edit it.
“What about it?” I ask.
“Did you see the comments?”
“I don’t think so. What’d they say?”
“Someone called the caption weird.”
I’m a toy.
Come, wind me up,
Play with me.
Her voice cracks. “They said it was sick. Do people think that?”
“Person, not people, and no, they don’t think that. How many other comments were there?”
“I don’t know.” She shrugs. “There were four more.”
“And?”
“They were good.”
“So it’s one person, and clearly, this kind of stuff isn’t for her.”
“Him,” she corrects. “I looked at his account. It’s private, but there’s a bible verse in the description.”
“It’s one comment out of many from someone who obviously came across the photo by accident.” I kiss her temple. “Don’t let it get to you.”
She flattens her hand on my chest. “It just made me think. I am weird. How come I can’t just keep these thoughts to myself like a normal person? Why did I write them down? Why would I want people to read them?”
I study her face, the way her nose slopes to a perfect little point. Bible thumper or not, I’ll knock out any motherfucker who makes her feel ashamed. Her words come from deep inside her. They can never be bad, because they’re honest. “If either of us was a normal person, I wouldn’t have met you,” I tell her. “I wouldn’t have gone out of my way to find you, and,” I pause, my heart thumping, “I wouldn’t be falling in love with you.”
She blinks up at me, a tear dripping off her eyelash. A megawatt smile spreads across her face. “What?”
“You heard me.” I can’t help mirroring her grin. “This has been the best month of my life. I’m falling in love with you, Halston. I think I’m already there, but I don’t want to scare you off, so consider this a warning—it’s happening.”
“It’s happening for me too.”
“I figured.”
She laughs and jolts me with a quick kiss on the lips. “I’m falling in love with you.”
Her eyes sparkle, partly from the tears, but I hope from what I just admitted. Fate finally took pity on me. It dropped her most intimate thoughts and feelings right at my feet and said, This is it, you poor schmuck. Here you go, now leave me alone. I knew then, I needed this in my life. Once Rich was out of the picture, there was no reason for me not to love her.
“What about my post from today?” I thumb the hollow of her cheek. “It wasn’t for them. It was for you.”
“I didn’t see it. After I spent too long trying and failing to stalk that man who commented, I deleted the app from my phone.”
I raise my eyebrows. I wouldn’t be surprised if she checked it ten times a day. “Seriously?”
“I overreacted. I’ll restore it.” She tries to get my phone from my pocket, squirming in my lap as she feels around. So help me God, I’ve got the patience of a saint. I’ve held out over forty-eight hours and now she’s tempting the beast. She finds what she’s looking for and goes to the post.
In the photo, she’s asleep. Her body is outlined by my white sheet, her legs scissored across the mattress.
In my sheets.
In my head.
“When did you take this?” she asks.
“Sunday morning, before I woke you to say goodbye.”
“I love it. You’re so talented.” She widens her eyes. “Four-hundred-likes talented. Wow.”
I smile. I haven’t read the comments. I don’t normally. Maybe I should start, though. I don’t like seeing her this upset over something a stranger said, and I won’t be able to wipe it away with I love you every time. I have to start watching for these things.
I tilt her head up and touch her bottom lip. “I only care about one like.”
She catches my thumb between her teeth, then licks it. “You have it.”
“I might need some convincing. I haven’t been inside you in three days, and you’re not all over me like I’d hoped.”
“It was two days,” she says. “We had sex before you left.”
“Oh yeah,” I say, nodding. “I woke you up to say bye, and I was almost out the door when you jumped me.”
“I promised I’d be fast, and I was. Have you ever gotten a condom on in two seconds? Maybe I should be in charge of that from now on.”
I squeeze the side of her ass, adjusting her so she can feel what her words do to me. “I don’t remember it being that fast. I might need to see it again.” I rake a hand through her hair and hold her in place for a kiss. She was crying only a couple minutes ago, and I should restrain myself, but I’ve been suffering without this. I put my hand up her skirt and find a treat. “Are these for me?” I ask, unhooking one of her garters.
She responds with a hip-swivel so skilled, I almost lose my eyeballs to the back of my head. “Fuck, Halston. Touch me. Don’t make me wait.”
She opens the button of my jeans and squeezes her hand inside. Her cold skin jolts me, but she warms up quickly, stroking me long and hard. “Like this? Or . . .” She looks me in the eye as she thumbs my crown, spreading precum over it. “That?”
I fist her elastic band. “How important are these tights to you? I’m either going to rip or come on them.”
“You said that last time, and you did neither.”
A challenge? I stand, nearly upending her onto the ground, but I catch her at the last second. “Bend over the couch.”
When she does, her skirt rides up the backs of her thighs, exposing more garter clips. I unzip my pants all the way. I haven’t had her from behind often, mainly because I like to watch her face as she comes. No time like the present. She’s just as pretty from this angle and appetizing as fuck.
I slip my hands under her blouse to grasp her breasts. She prepared for me, the scrape of her lace bra welcome against my palms. She shivers when I caress her lower back, goosebumps pebbling her skin. Slipping a finger into the elastic crotch of her panties, I say, “Next time wear white, so I can see how wet you are.”
“White is for virgins,” she says, backing onto my hand.
“There are still so many things I haven’t done to you,” I murmur, admiring her smooth apple of an ass. “You practically are a virgin.”
“Tell me what things,” she says. “It’s only fair. You’ve read most of my dirty thoughts.”
“Most?” My cock strains against the confines of my underwear. I pull my shirt over my head before removing my pants.
“You think I could fit everything in one journal?” she asks.
I stroke myself and look up at the ceiling. Lord, help me. This woman is figuring out just what it takes to ruin me, and I’m not even going to try and stop her. “All right. I’ll tell you. We’ve fucked, we’ve made love,” I say. “We’ve even dry humped.”
She drops her forehead onto a cu
shion. “What else is there?”
I can’t go much longer like this. I’m so hard, it hurts. My balls actually pulse. “I haven’t fucked your mouth.”
“I’ve given you a blowjob.”
“I’m not talking about that.” I yank her underwear down around her thighs and suck on my two favorite fingers. “I’m talking about fucking your mouth.”
Her legs are already shaking, and I’ve barely touched her. I tease her entrance to get her as wet as possible.
“What else?” she asks.
She wants to hear more. I’ve eaten her dirty secrets like candy, and now she’s the hungry one. Maybe it’s not my hands making her wet, but the admission of what I want. Exposing myself through the ways I want to own her. “Your ass,” I say. “I’ll get that too, but later. There’s enough time for me to explore, lick, suck, and fuck every hole on your body. You can be my student, my patient, my submissive, my toy. Even my teacher. If you want those things.”
Her back expands with a deep inhale. “What else?”
Greedy, just like me. I curl my fingers inside her and massage. “Mmm. In public. Side of the road, friendly skies, beach—whatever does it for you.”
She groans. “Don’t stop.”
When I first saw Halston through the window, there’s no doubt I was attracted to her. But now that she’s bared herself to me, she’s walking sex. It isn’t just physical. It’s the way she’s let me in so deep, so fast. I’ve submerged myself in her, or she’s done it for me. “I want to fuck you as a bride,” I say, pushing the limits of the conversation as I finger her to the edge. “In a wedding dress so white, any stain would show.”
“Oh my God,” she says, writhing on my hand. “Keep talking.”
“I want to come inside you so bad. Make you mine. I want you so many ways, and one day, as the mother of my child. If you want those things.”
“Why?” she asks. “Why do you want to ruin me?”
“Just in case any other fucker tries to come along,” I say. Her pussy flutters around me. With my fingers inside her, I bear down and line my cock up to her entrance. It takes me a few seconds to get just my head into such a tight space. “To me, you’ll never be ruined, Halston. You’ll always be perfect. Am I hurting you?”
She fists the cushion and shakes her head. “Are you going to do it like that?”
I slide out a little and push deeper, the ridges of my shaft rubbing against my knuckles. “If I last long enough, yeah. Does it feel good?”
“I feel . . . tight.”
“So goddamn tight.” I flatten my other hand on her lower back and pump my hips a few times. When she moans, I flick my fingers inside her and fuck her for real. She’s shuddering in no time, making noises so foreign, I have to check to make sure she isn’t crying. She’s in the throes of an intense orgasm. Her cum, or maybe mine, seeps onto my balls, over my hand. My body reacts to the sight of it. Mid-thrust, I yank out of her and erupt all over her back, thighs, dress, stockings.
Fuck.
My legs buckle, and I steady myself on the back of the couch. By the time I’m finished, cum drips down her skin.
I’m breathless. She’s so still, for a second, I’m worried she passed out. Or that I fucked up by thinking it was okay to come on her. I massage her ass cheeks, her lower back. She moans, turning her head to the side. Hair sticks to her temple. “Finn.”
I don’t have to ask what she needs.
I tug her up by her arm, and she stands, her back to my front. I turn her face to give me access to her mouth. I kiss her for the way I just took her, feed her love so she knows how I worship her body even when I’m rough.
“You can come inside me,” she whispers.
“I know.”
She liquefies against me. I love it. I love her.
I’m the lucky bastard who gets to hold her against me, making sure she doesn’t fall. The one who can chase her sadness away.
I hope I’m always the one to do it. And that I’m always able to.
19
Around the corner from Halston’s office, I browse a selection of flowers outside a bodega. They’re nothing extraordinary, overshadowed by miniature Christmas trees, metallic ribbons, and potted poinsettias. But they’re here now. If time and money were no object, I might aim for something nicer.
It’s no coincidence that I’m here, but I’m not about to admit that to her.
I choose red roses. Red says romance. It’s the color of love and sex.
It also means stop, for anyone who might need to hear it.
I hand over some cash and once I have the bouquet in hand, I call Halston.
“I was just thinking about you,” she answers.
“You must’ve sensed me nearby.”
“What?” Her voice pitches. “You’re here?”
“Downstairs.” I grin. “I had a thing in the area. Let’s go for lunch.”
“Really?” I hear the smile in her voice. “All right. I just have to finish up a few e-mails. I’ll be right down.”
“There’s no rush. I’ll come up.”
“No, no, don’t bother. I can meet you in the lobby.”
Halston has a whole other life I’m not part of, and that’s been fine up until now. But I’ve told her I’m falling for her. I’m not going anywhere. I just want to make sure that message is clear. “And miss the opportunity to finally see where you spend your days?” I ask. “Fourth floor, right?”
“Well—”
I hang up and cross 14th Street. On the ride up the elevator, I smooth my hair and scruff into place. I decided not to shave the stubble I already had this morning, but maybe I should’ve. Maybe it’s more “wandering vagrant” than “intimidating boyfriend.” The doors open to a white-tiled, gray-walled lobby with black and white print ads on the walls. I wonder if Halston chose which ones to feature.
Halston comes around a corner and smiles. “Are those for me?”
I look at the roses. “Oh. I hadn’t thought of that. Sure.”
She laughs and takes them. I lean in, but she pulls away before I can kiss her. “I’m sorry. I can’t.”
“Why not?” I ask. “Are we doing something wrong?”
She twists her lips and turns away. “I’ll show you my office.”
I place my hand on the small of her back and walk with her. She doesn’t seem to mind that. As she points out the different departments, I look around the office. It’s a big floor. Rich works on the opposite side, but apparently that doesn’t keep him away. I don’t know what he looks like, but I think I’ll know him if I see him. In case there’s any question the roses are from me, I keep my hand where it is. If he’s not here to see it, maybe someone will deliver the message.
Halston stops at a desk where a girl around her age is working on a computer. “Benny, this is Finn.”
Benny arches her eyebrows, looking between us. “Finn? The guy who . . . the one—”
“The very same,” I say. “I think I have you to thank for sending her to my doorstep that night.”
Benny’s cheeks redden. “It was my friend, Cara. She’s loony.”
I kiss the side of Halston’s head. “Thank her for me, Benny.”
Benny and Halston exchange a look that makes me wonder what I’m missing. “Dad?” Halston asks.
“Across town,” Benny says.
Halston exhales a breath and finally takes my hand. She pulls me into her office, shuts the door, and leans back against it. “I know why you’re here.”
“You do?”
“My office is on your fuck-et list.”
I straighten up. “My what?”
“Your bucket list for fucking. You said you wanted to do it in a car, on a plane, on a train, riding a bicycle, during a game of tennis—”
I laugh. “I did not list all those, and that’s not why I’m here. Swear. I think about you when we’re apart, and I never know exactly where to picture you.” I glance around the office. There’s nothing on the walls, a couple second-hand-lo
oking chairs, and a messy desk. “Now I know.”
“I’ve never gotten around to decorating.” She nods at a small couch against the wall behind me. “Just some pillows.”
“Now you’ll have flowers too.” I walk over and take the roses from her, pricking myself with a thorn. Damn it. “I think you should display them on Benny’s desk so everyone can enjoy them.”
“By everyone, do you mean Rich?” she asks.
Busted. “Nah. You look beautiful, by the way.”
She rolls her eyes. “I told you I’d handle him.”
“I know. I’m just checking on things like a good boyfriend.”
Halston scratches the inside of her elbow, absentmindedly, sluggishly, as if she’s thinking. I didn’t think she’d like me checking up on her, it sounds like a Dad move, but I’m willing to take the heat if it means getting Rich off her back. She sighs. “Look. My dad doesn’t know about us. He’s protective. I’ll tell him when the time’s right.”
I kiss her on the forehead, no small feat since she’s in flats today and barely comes up to my chest. I get it. I’m a dad myself. And if he cares about his daughter the way I do mine, the way I care about Halston, I’d feel the same. “Don’t worry about it. You said you had some e-mails to send?”
“I can do it later.”
“It’s fine. I’ll use the restroom while you finish up.”
“Okay.” She gives me directions, but I’m not listening. I turn to leave her office. “You’re taking the roses?” she asks.
“You ever been in a men’s bathroom?” I ask. “I need somewhere to stick my face. The smell alone—”
“Yuck.” She waves her hands. “I don’t need details.”
I exit her office, close the door behind me, and walk no more than five steps. “What’s the deal?” I ask Benny.
She looks up at me and blinks. “Sorry?”
“With Rich. Is he causing problems for her?”
“I don’t . . . I’m not—”
Tempt Me: A First Class Romance Collection Page 19