by Sage Sask
“I will hurt you. Very badly,” Jackie mutters.
Sawyer, focused on his book, mutters, “When you do, please make sure you get the right brother. As in, not me. I have big plans to celebrate my next birthday.”
I absorb the camaraderie between all of them. They are friends and colleagues. They respect one another without judgment or expectations. I have never been part of a unit like this — never been included or made to feel like I belong. I imagine what it would have been like to have grown up here and to have always been a part of them.
“The magnet and polarization?” I ask quietly. “Is it meant to protect against the Resistance?”
The group glances at one another and then me. They are silent until Cassia finally answers. “Yes. They are the main ones the Circle wants to keep out.”
“Where I come from, the Resistance acted to hurt others. Why would former Circle members join them?” I ask.
“Because of our loyalty to the government. That makes us their enemy,” Derrick answers. “They want their freedom.”
“Freedom to do what?” I ask.
“To hurt and destroy us,” Phoenix bites out, her fury silencing the group. “They think we’re wrong for wanting to help the world. They want to kill us for doing what’s right.”
There’s a flash of a training room. Children fill it. They battle one another in a quest to be stronger. Never stop fighting.
“When did they leave the Circle?” I push, anxious for answers. I want to believe I am not one of them, but until I know the truth, I cannot be sure.
Samira scans the area to make sure no one is listening. “Sixteen years ago.”
My blood runs cold. I barely hear Jackie add, “The Council calls it the Night of the Escape. Since then, a few have tried to breach the Circle, but…” She stops.
“But?” I look around when everyone goes silent.
“Harrison kills them on sight.”
A burning pain jabs at my stomach as if someone is stabbing me repeatedly with a knife. I try to picture my mother, but I cannot see her face. If she is – was – a part of the Resistance and was killed…It would explain why she has not come for me. My hands start to tremble. I drag them down the side of my pants to hide my reaction. Acid rises through my throat.
“Who came?” I whisper through my fear. Derrick and Jackie’s gazes sharpen as they look at me and then each other. I quickly veil my emotions.
“We don’t know.” Cassia seems oblivious to Derrick and Jackie’s reaction. “Harrison doesn’t share too much information.”
“Information about what?” David asks.
Everyone turns in surprise to see him hovering near our group.
“What do you want, David?” Hudson glares at David.
“Just came to share the good news.” David zeroes in on me. “Excellent job this morning in the capsule. As a reward, you are in the top group for the start of phase two.”
“Phase two?” I ask when Jackie tenses.
“You missed phase one of training. Fighting, self-defense maneuvers,” Melanie explains. “Start of phase two? We climb cliffs.”
“The top group” – Jackie jerks her thumb toward David – “is his.”
“Over the water.” David smiles broadly when my gaze flies to his. “Shiny New Penny, you get to prove yourself again. You’re not afraid of a little water, are you?” Not waiting for my answer, he leaves with an exaggerated wave. “Night, everyone.”
I shiver in the warm air. My fear is just another one of the many secrets I have kept. How could David have known? Ryan? He’s the only person who may have figured it out. He saw my reaction to Serafina’s window. He sensed my fear when I first heard the ocean water.
“What does David know, Alexia?” Derrick asks softly.
Keeping my voice low, I ask, “How do I change groups?”
Derrick and Samira share a glance. I see my worry reflected in their eyes. What are they keeping from me? Across from me, Jackie watches carefully.
“Ryan,” Derrick finally answers. “He’s your trainer. He’s the only one who can help you.”
My heart drops. The one who betrayed me is my only chance at survival.
EIGHTEEN
I knock on Ryan’s bedroom door and wait. When there’s no answer, I try the knob and it turns. I check the empty hallway before opening the door slowly.
“Ryan?”
Silence. I open the door fully to reveal a room similar to mine. Whereas mine is a mess, his bed is perfectly made. Sheaves of papers are stacked neatly on the desk. Two framed pictures stand next to them. Curious, I glance once more behind me, then step in and shut the door.
I ignore the picture of him and Victoria and instead reach for a photo of a woman who, except for her hair color, looks exactly like Ryan. The same tattoo Ryan has on his shoulder is etched into the skin beneath her ear. I turn the frame over for an inscription, but it’s blank.
“Do you make a habit of snooping, or am I an exception?” Ryan asks from behind me.
I jump and drop the frame, cringing when it hits the desk. I quickly right it. “I was looking for you,” I explain.
“And you thought I might be in the desk?” Ryan demands. Dressed only in sweatpants, he tugs on the towel tossed haphazardly around his neck.
“You have the same tattoo,” I murmur, staring at his bare chest and then the woman’s picture. “Is she your mom?”
“What do you want?” He grabs a shirt thrown over the back of his chair and slips it on. “Edmonds?” he prods.
“I’m here to ask for your help.” He’s not going to answer me. Stubborn, I realize. I refocus on the reason I’m here. I dread asking after what he did to me, but I have no choice. “With David’s group.”
His face tightens. “You assume I know what you’re talking about.” He moves away from me and toward his window without bars.
“He told me I was in his group. I want to change it.” I block his path, forcing him to look at me.
“And why would I do that?” He easily lifts me with two hands and moves me out of his way.
“Because you were the one who told him about me and water,” I hiss.
His eyes narrow as he considers me. “What about you and water?”
On his genuine confusion, I wonder for just a second whether he’s telling the truth. Then I remind myself he was the only one who knew. I start to wrap my arms around my waist, then drop them. The first rule of battle – don’t show weakness.
“Can you change my group?”
“Why, Edmonds? What does David know?”
I want to scream at him for playing dumb. “Don’t lie to me.” I start to turn away, but he turns me back to face him. I yank my arm out of his grip.
“Pretend I don’t know what you’re talking about and tell me what David said.”
I study him, trying to understand the game he is playing. “He knew details about me.”
“What details?” When I stay silent, he scoffs. “You come here to ask me for help but want to keep your secrets?” He motions toward the door. “You can show yourself out.”
“They found me on the shore.” Every time I repeat the details, I relive the day I became all alone in the world. “I was lost in the ocean.”
“I already know this.” His stance gentles but I refuse to react. Not if he was the one that betrayed me. “You said you don’t remember anything beforehand.” His gaze searches mine. Afraid of what he might see, I drop my head and stare at the floor. I can hear him thinking, considering, then his swallow. “You’re afraid of the water?”
I hate him for doing this — for forcing me to admit what David knows. “Why are you doing this? Is it a sick mental game?”
“You think I told him that? Why?” he asks.
My eyes meet his as I laugh bitterly. “I don’t know. To hurt me?�
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“Then why would I help you?” he asks, considering me.
“Derrick said you were the only one who could.” I feel foolish for having tried. For believing his actions showed something other than distrust of me. “You worried about my threshold of pain during the Council meeting. You pulled me from the plane. I hoped you would regret…” I taper off, unsure myself of my hopes.
“Telling him and undo it?” he finishes.
“Yes.”
We stare at one another in the darkening room. Ryan runs a hand over his neck and shuts his eyes. When he opens them, I see his regret.
“I’m sorry. There’s nothing I can do about David. His decision is final.”
NINETEEN
I blow on my folded hands to keep warm. When I exhale, I create a little cloud of fog. I avoid glancing at the water. My heart rate spikes with each crash of the water against the shore. Quick, short breaths to help regulate my breathing. Fear lines my palms with sweat.
“David has always been a jerk, but this is low even for him,” Samira complains, oblivious to what is happening inside my head. “Forcing us out before sunrise.”
Last night David sent out a last-minute notice that we were to meet at five a.m. With the temperature near freezing, we huddle together to stay warm.
“Each of you has been assigned to a leader,” Ryan announces.
The cliffs reach for the sky in front of us. I crane my neck to see the top of them. From the front Ryan calls out instructions. Behind him, the sun starts to rise over the ocean. A fine mist covers my bare hands.
A massive wave crests and then crashes against the sand. A heavy wind whips over the cliffs and slams into them. The combined sound saturates the air, drowning everything out but Ryan’s voice.
I rub my sweaty palms repeatedly against my thighs. Standing here is the closest I have been to the ocean since that day.
“Are you OK?” Samira nudges my shoulder. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I’m good.” I try to convince both of us at the same time. Every time the fear rises, I remind myself I have to do this. Only by passing the Evaluation do I get my freedom. “It’s just early.”
Samira doesn’t seem convinced but nods nonetheless. She hands me a roll from the dozen she stuffed into her coat pocket. With no time to eat, everyone snatched whatever food they could to go.
Grateful, I take a bite, but my mouth feels like a bucket of sand. Unable to swallow, I spit it out then throw the rest to the hovering seagulls.
“We will each lead a group.” Ryan gestures to Jackie, David, Cassia, and Derrick. At their feet lie harnesses and picks. “In your groups, you’ll climb to the top of the cliff and then back down. It’s standard protocol for training.” He turns to a bored David. “You made the list?”
David hands Ryan a rumpled sheet of paper. Ryan reads through it quickly. His face tightens and a muscle in his jaw twitches. He raises his gaze to meet mine. Still angry at him from last night, I look away.
“When I call your name, go to your assigned group.”
Derrick’s is the first group out. They follow him to the furthest cliff from us. Next up are Cassia’s and Jackie’s groups. Each one consists of a mix of readers and agents. Though I know my group, I listen carefully to each name, hoping against reason that it was changed.
Ryan calls for his group last. He points them to the only cliff submerged in the water. Shocked, I start to feel relief when David speaks up.
“Wrong cliff, mate.” David smirks at me. Refusing to cower, I meet his gaze head-on. “That one is mine.”
“My mistake,” Ryan says smoothly. “The rest of you are with David. Good luck.”
“Let’s go,” David shouts at those of us remaining. He glances at the water before clucking in shame. “Don’t want the tide to get any higher. Do we, Alexia?”
I swallow the sour taste in my mouth as I follow David and the others to our cliff. Everyone stops to toss shoes onto the shore. The water swirls around my bare ankles and feet. I start to shake as memories of that day return.
A mumbled voice whispers in my ear. I struggle to stay afloat. I push the image away, but it comes harder, beating on me.
“Problem?” David leans in until he is inches from my face. The rest of his group turns to watch us.
“No.” I shake off the memories. “No problem.”
David grins, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He drops his equipment at the base of the rocks. Water continues to splash over our feet. Refusing to show weakness, I steel myself against any more memories.
“Ever climbed before?” On my silence, he yells, “Yes or no?”
“No,” I say between gritted teeth.
Satisfied, David turns to face the group. “Looks like the rest of us are in for a treat.” He picks up the harness. “You climb to the top and back down.” He points to the safety rope. “That keeps you from falling.” He drives two picks into the rocks. “These are your handles.” He looks around. “Volunteer?”
“I’ll go first,” Levi says.
He was with David the first time I met him. An agent-in-training, he is smaller than the others. In the gym, he works hard and is often the last one to leave. He’s quiet in comparison to David’s boorishness. But they are always together and clearly good friends. Now, he quickly gets into position then waits while David tightens the harness around his waist.
David tosses him the rope. “Do a figure-eight knot.”
Having never done one before, I carefully watch as Levi makes the knot in three maneuvers. David hands him the metal skyhooks before securing the long rope to the lever at the bottom of the cliff.
“The rope stays tight as you climb,” David instructs. “If you lose your grip, it will keep you in place until you regain position. Clear?”
Levi steps onto a protruding rock and thrusts the skyhook into the sediment. He checks the rope then pulls up. In the distance, the other groups move on to their second and third climbers.
Levi climbs steadily but slowly up the wall. He grips the hooks. Once at the top, he glances down. David gives him a nod of approval. On his descent, he searches for footing with every step. With only a few feet left, he jumps off the cliff and into the sand. I join the group in giving him a round of applause. The next climber gets into position and does the climb quickly.
David handpicks the next three climbers. They are all readers. The first one climbs effortlessly, but the next two are hesitant. They consider every step before taking it. Across the beach, Jackie’s group finishes with their last climber. Derrick’s and Cassia’s groups start to load their supplies and head back to the main building.
“Your turn,” David says to me. “Save the best for last.” David holds out the harness. “What do you think, Shiny New Penny?”
“If I say, it might hurt your feelings.” I yank the harness out of his hands then quickly clip it on. I tie the rope into a figure eight.
“Someone’s anxious.” David motions toward the cliff. “Get started. Or do you need a boost?”
Ignoring him, I blank out the water as I wade through it toward the cliff. With both hands, I pull myself onto the ledge. The sun, having escaped the cloud cover, beats down. Sweat droplets trickle down from my forehead onto my nose. I assess each step before positioning my foot. The rocks scrape against my sock-clad feet. Slow and steady. I grunt in pain when a jutting rock jabs into my stomach.
One step up follows another. A rumbling catches my attention. I glance up just as a piece of broken rock tumbles down. I turn my head but not fast enough. It scrapes my cheek then shoulder before smashing into the ground. Unable to tend to the wound, I swallow my moan of pain.
Dependent on adrenaline, I pull my hand back and stab the wall with my skyhook. Wind whips over my face and through my hair. With every step, the rope tightens around me – the only safeguard from fall
ing to my death. Beneath me, the roar of the ocean multiplies. I look up. Nearly there. I drop my head to take a deep breath.
“We don’t have all day,” David yells.
I ignore him, refusing to let him affect me. I keep my pace until I am only a few steps from the top. One. Two. Three. There. A ripple of excitement starts in my belly and rises until I am smiling. I did it. Excited, I dare a peek over the rim of the cliffs.
Air bubbles rise and burst off the surface of the water. The blue water slides effortlessly against the shore then tears back toward the center. It leaves a bed of wet sand in its wake. Sunlight bounces off the white caps — a vision of beauty. But not for everyone, I remember. The welcoming pool conceals dark evil lurking right beneath the surface. I shut my eyes against the threatening memories. Desperate to escape them, I start my descent.
With each step closer, I can hear the gathered group below chatting. Derrick’s and Cassia’s groups are gone. Ryan is congratulating his final climber. I am the only one left on the cliffs. I force myself to look down to gauge the remaining distance. Halfway there. My eyes meet David’s. He is silent, expressionless. A shiver runs through me.
I grip the skyhook then search for a foothold. My heel hits a protruding ledge. Gingerly I rest my weight on it. Repeating the sequence, I take each step, methodical and careful. My arm muscles ache, and my legs feel like jelly.
“Looks like you need some help, Alexia,” David calls up.
I ignore him. A tug on my rope grabs my attention. I glance down just as David opens a pocketknife. Before I can object or beg him not to, he flicks his wrist and slices the rope. The end dangles midair. My heart rate skyrockets. I am on the edge of the cliff, completely unprotected. Shocked gasps from the other members fill the air.
“Much better,” David announces.
My body freezes as my brain goes into overdrive to try and process his actions. The cut rope mocks me as it sways hypnotically in the wind. I grip the skyhook. They are my only safety net from falling to my death.