by Brent, Cora
Taylor’s arms were wrapped around my shoulders. I was extremely aware that her breasts touched my chest.
“Have I mentioned how stunning you look tonight?” I asked her.
She couldn’t hide her pleasure. “I didn’t miss the way you had to pick your mouth up off the floor. I won’t deny it’s good to hear you say it out loud though.”
“You’re gorgeous, Taylor.”
Our foreheads were inches from touching. Her breath tickled my face. Her lips would taste so sweet.
“And you’re going to ruin me with talk like that,” she whispered.
I wanted to ruin her. I wanted to ruin her for every other guy who tried to stake a claim on her heart and her mind and her body.
Sometimes I had hard time remembering why I hadn’t done it yet.
An eruption of obnoxious wolf whistles killed the moment. The guilty parties were my cousins Rider and Ethan and they stood on the periphery of the dance floor in search of targets. The sons of Stone and Conway, they were in the insufferable teenage phase when everything sexual or serious was to be mocked without mercy.
I glared at them even though I knew for sure I hadn’t been any different at that age.
They howled with laughter at the sight of my stern face and then ran off to find a different relative to annoy.
Taylor wasn’t annoyed though. She smiled after them. “Your family is so fun and intricate. I’m envious.”
“They are something special.” I was struck with a brilliant idea. “We should be a reality tv show. Can you imagine what a massive hit it would be? We could call it ‘Grooving With The Gentrys’.”
She was skeptical. “What’s grooving? Isn’t that like dancing?”
“It needs to start with G. That’s the only word I could think of.”
“The Good Gentrys. The Generous Gentrys. The Glorious Gentrys. There are plenty of better adjectives that begin with G.”
“You’re right. I think I’ll put you in charge of show production.”
“I’ve got it,” she said, hit with inspiration. “The Gallant Gentrys. I like that one. It might be my favorite.”
“I’ll be sure to propose the suggestion at our next family meeting.”
She breathed out a laugh and then noticed Paige and Derek, who were having an intense love affair all over the dance floor. Nothing had ever been more amusing than seeing my big brother flip out over a girl. And Paige was perfect for him. I’d bet twenty years of my future salary that the next family wedding in the pipeline would be theirs.
Taylor was still watching them. “They’re awesome together.”
“They absolutely are.” I cleared my throat. “Hey, listen. There’s something I’ve been meaning to bring up. I was just waiting for the right time. Remember how I told you that Derek and Paige live in a huge house?”
“Sure. You said it was kind of famous, right? People call it the Gingerbread House or something.”
“That’s right. Anyway, they’ve got more spare rooms than they can use so they were asking if you’d like to move over there. You’d be welcome to stay as long as you want.”
She stopped moving in time to the music and lowered her eyes. I felt like I’d just made a mistake.
“Do you want me to move there?” she asked quietly.
“You’d have your own room. Hell, probably your own bathroom. You’d have a hell of a lot more privacy. And you already know Derek and Paige are cool.”
She nodded and looked straight at me. “That’s not what I asked you, Kel.”
“I just want you to have options.”
Her smile was a little sad now. “And you probably want your bathroom counter space back.”
I didn’t give a damn about her makeup on the bathroom counter or about the bras she hung over the shower rod to dry after she did her laundry.
“Taylor,” I said but then I was cut off by my Uncle Cord announcing that everyone should take a seat because it was time to cut the cake.
I led her back to our table with my hand on her back and wishing I hadn’t said anything about Derek’s offer. I should have picked another moment. A moment when I could clarify to her what I meant. And how I felt. The time had come to have that discussion.
Meanwhile, the air had shifted between us. Taylor still smiled charmingly at my family and didn’t exactly freeze me out but I was aware that the suggestion about moving had left her feeling a little hurt.
One unintended side effect of today’s event was all about me and her. We needed to have a talk. We needed to do it before everything blew up in a bad way.
When the opportunity came up after the cake was gone I collared Thomas one on one and asked him for a big favor. He agreed without hesitation. He didn’t even need me to explain.
Chapter Twenty-One
Taylor
Neither one of us had said anything for the longest time. We were both chronic talkers, especially when we were together so we’d probably already reached some kind of record for a Kellan/Taylor dialogue void.
Emblem had been left behind many miles ago and I kept playing with the radio and finding songs I liked as an excuse to dodge conversation.
We were within ten miles of home when I turned the radio down. “I don’t understand why Thomas didn’t come with us.”
Kellan glanced at me. “He wanted to crash at Derek and Paige’s place so he rode home with them. It just made sense.”
“No, it doesn’t. It doesn’t make sense at all. Why would he want to stay with your brother who only lives a few miles away as opposed to coming home and sleeping in his own bed?”
“He misses Derek. He’s lucky enough to get to see me every day and he’s sad that he doesn’t get to see Derek nearly as often.”
I exhaled. “You’re lying.”
“Yup and you’re pissed at me.”
I was surprised. “I am not.”
I really wasn’t. How could I be angry with Kellan? He had every right to want to reclaim his living room from the hapless tenant who messed up his couch every night. I tried to be neat but eventually the concept of an eternal houseguest had to be irritating. He’d done more for me than I had any right to expect. I would always be appreciative. And now he’d gone out of his way to try and secure a room for me in his brother’s house. I would probably enjoy living with Paige. We got along spectacularly and we’d both suffered significant family losses.
So no, I wasn’t angry with Kellan. It just took me back a step to hear that he didn’t want me around. That wasn’t his fault. Just like it wasn’t his fault that I’d recently recognized the fact that I was crazy in love with him. He bore no responsibility for my fantasies.
Kellan didn’t believe my denial. He sighed. “You’re upset, Taylor. Let’s talk about it.”
“I’m not upset.”
“You’re not upset? I can feel the frustration radiating from your skin.”
“Then you have quite a magical imagination.”
He snorted out some laughter. “Listen to us. We’re arguing like an old couple.”
“But we’re not. We’re not a couple at all, are we, Kellan?”
The sound of my bitterness almost made me gag. I didn’t even want to know what Kellan thought. He was probably silently grumbling about being stuck in a vehicle with some pouting, obsessive chick.
He chose not to answer and I had no wish to dig my hole any deeper so I flicked the radio station and turned up the volume again. We suffered through many minutes of screeching death metal until he turned into The Palms and parked in front of his building.
Kellan cut the engine. “I knew that was what was bothering you.”
I scoffed with a shake of the head. “Nope, I refuse to play the part of possessive fruitcake. Forget I said anything.”
“Taylor.” He sighed out my name. He gazed at me with undisguised pity.
“Please, Kellan? Forget it.”
My face felt hot. My throat threatened to close and my eyes filled. Love was horrible. I needed a
tissue.
I threw the car door open and exited in a hurry. Once we were out of the confines of the car then my tears would stop and we could talk normally and forget that I was acting like an insecure girlfriend.
Two seconds later I tripped on the parking lot curb. My heel broke and my ankle rolled and I sprawled on the concrete in a daze, wondering how I’d evolved into such a series of human calamities.
“Are you okay?” Kellan was there in an instant with all kinds of wide-eyed worry all over his face.
“Oh, shit,” I said to him from the ground. “You never did find your jacket, did you?”
He chuckled and helped me sit up.
“Forget the damn jacket. Did you get hurt?”
I flexed my ankle. It might be a little sore tomorrow but I’d live. “No, but I’m pretty sure this pair of shoes is done for.”
“Too bad.” He examined the broken heel and clucked his tongue. “Now you’ll have to go back to being short.”
“Don’t screw with me right now, Gentry,” I growled and tried to stand.
He took matters into his own hands, sweeping me up in his arms as if I weighed no more than a child.
“I can walk,” I said, objecting but not really because my arms circled his neck and my skin lit up with pleasure.
“I know,” he said and marched me over to the apartment door like a postcard of an old fashioned romance.
Once we were there the dreamy moment had to end because Kellan needed to fish his key out and open the door. He motioned for me to enter first.
I kicked off my other shoe into the darkness and found the light switch.
Kellan followed me in and quietly closed the door behind him.
“So what do we do now?” I asked. “Laugh and joke and fake our mutual indifference? I tried it, Kel. I really have. But this time I don’t think I can do it.”
I needed to know how he felt. I needed to hear the truth even if it crushed me.
He leaned against the breakfast counter and slowly allowed his eyes to climb over my body. Then he exhaled with annoyance and raked a hand through his hair.
“Dammit, Taylor. Why do you have to be so beautiful?”
I looked down at myself. I ran my hands over my belly and felt the curve of my hips. I’d been told I was beautiful since I was a child. When my body began changing into that of a woman I didn’t like it when boys and men much older than me took notice. And then I grew to love it. The attention. The power that came from having people notice me. I thought I could do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted and treat people as I pleased. Sometimes I was mean. I was always arrogant, believing my looks and my family’s money and social status meant the world belonged to me.
Standing here now in this sexy dress made me feel ridiculous. I wanted it off. Operating on pure impulse I reached around to tug the zipper down, then seized the bottom of the dress and pulled it clean over my head.
Kellan watched me in silence. I stood there in my black strapless bra and matching satin panties. I balled my dress up and threw it at him. He caught it and placed it carefully on the counter as if it belonged there.
I was breathing hard. I might begin hyperventilating.
“Do you want me?” I challenged.
His eyes shifted back to me. “You know I want you.”
“You do and you don’t, Kellan. Isn’t that right? Tell me, is it just like a reflex? Just because I’m here right in front of you and I have hair and tits and a pretty nice ass if I do say so myself. And you can’t help but respond because you have a dick. One that worked really really well if memory serves.”
He peered down at his crotch. “It still works.”
“Show me,” I whispered.
He closed his eyes for a second. Then he shook his head.
“Why?” I was whining. Those hot tears from earlier threatened to upstage the scene again.
“Because.” He left his post over at the counter and cut the distance between us in half. “I want to do this right.”
I threw up my hands. “Kellan, what is your version of right? I’m not telepathic. I can’t figure it out on my own.”
He took his time about answering. Usually Kellan shot back responses like a boomerang. But now he stood there thinking and collecting all the pieces of everything he needed to say before he opened his mouth.
And when he did he looked me right in the eye so I’d have no doubt he meant every word.
“I’ll tell you. When I can knock on your door and wait for you to answer while listening to my heart pound because I can’t wait to see you again. And because I can’t wait to pile on all the compliments you deserve and spoil you with a romantic dinner. Then maybe I’ll take you dancing afterwards or hold your hand through a movie. And after that I want to look forward to bringing you home and making love to you over and over again until you fall asleep in my arms. That’s my version of right, Taylor. That’s how I want things to be with you. With us.”
For a moment I could say nothing. Then when I did say something it was something stupid.
“That, um, does sound kind of nice.”
He raised an eyebrow. “You think so?”
“Yes. I think I need to sit down though.”
I sank down on the couch, belatedly realizing I was still in my underwear. Then I decided it didn’t matter.
Kellan remained at a distance, choosing not to sit beside me.
“Come here,” I begged.
“You know too damn well what will happen if I do.”
“Yes. You described it so eloquently. I want that too. I want to tire you out and then fall asleep together. What are we waiting for?”
He looked around at the evidence that I resided in his living room. There was my backpack underneath the coffee table. Tucked against the wall was a chipped three drawer dresser that Thomas had scored for me from Goodwill. A box sat sadly in the corner and contained sentimental scraps of my old life.
“What do you think you owe me?” His voice was quiet, ominous.
It was a strange question and I couldn’t help but bristle. “If you’re asking if I’m trying to initiate some kind of sordid payment plan for everything you’ve given me-“
“No!” He barked out the word, shaking his head forcefully. “That’s not even close to what I mean.”
“Then rephrase your question.”
He sighed. “Do you feel indebted to me?”
“That’s not sounding any better.”
“You’re being intentionally difficult.”
“I am not. And just to clear up your confusion, let me assure you that I don’t do anything I don’t want to with anyone I don’t want to be doing it with.”
He scratched his head. “What?”
“Never mind.” I stood up. My ankle smarted a little but I could manage to limp over to him with dignity. Sexy dignity. In my underwear.
Kellan, now uncharacteristically silent, did nothing but watch me. His tie had already been discarded. He watched me unbutton his shirt. He watched me while I rolled it off his broad shoulders. He watched me as I loosened his belt.
“I don’t want to wait,” I breathed, pulling the belt out of the loops and throwing it aside so I could work on his zipper. “You don’t want to wait either. Things don’t need to be perfect. We just need to be us.”
But Kellan had stopped watching me and stopped listening.
In fact he was leaving the room. Not just the room. He was leaving the apartment. He walked out and closed the door behind him without an explanation or a backward glance. If he wanted to pay me back for the time I’d slammed a door in face then he’d certainly picked a doozy of a moment.
The apartment was empty and silent.
And I couldn’t stay here.
I couldn’t keep playing this game of pretending the next day that nothing had happened because of Kellan Gentry’s chivalry.
My heart couldn’t take the abuse.
I had some resources now, as long as my bank account remained unmole
sted by Sierra and friends.
I would ask Paige if I could stay with her until I found something permanent. Supposedly she and Derek had already made the offer so it shouldn’t be a problem.
I went to the dresser and pulled out something to cover myself. I wouldn’t go storming out this late like a cranky teenager but I planned to be asleep whenever he came back, or at least look like I was asleep.
One way or another, this would be the last night I spent in Kellan’s living room.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Kellan
I knew what had to happen next.
This was where we’d been headed all along. I’d known it even before I admitted it to myself. And it was the reason why I asked Thomas to stay at Derek’s place tonight.
She was in there now, probably feeling furious and abandoned and fuck, I hoped she wasn’t crying. I didn’t walk out on her. I just needed to start this a different way.
I raised my hand and knocked loudly on the door. A shadow crossed the peephole and I heard her sigh on the other side before she opened the door.
Her hands went to her hips and a black v-neck tee now covered her upper body but didn’t reach low enough to eclipse her panties, which were every bit as flimsy and silky as they’d been two minutes ago.
“Did you forget your keys?” she asked.
“No.” I hadn’t forgotten them. I hadn’t brought them. They weren’t required for this.
I marched over the threshold and she started to take a step back. I didn’t let her. My right arm snaked around her waist and drew her in. Her eyes widened. She was surprised. Good.
“You look beautiful tonight,” I said. “And I couldn’t wait to see you again.”
She blinked, confused. At least she didn’t pull away from me. “Huh? You literally just saw me about ninety seconds ago and then you-.”
“Stop talking,” I demanded, tightening my arms around her and kicking the door closed behind me. My hand sought the bottom of her shirt, found an access point and slid up her back, lightly stroking her smooth skin. She thawed instantly, exhaling in a breathy moan that activated my dick. I pressed closer so she’d have a complete understanding of what she did to me.