by Haven Rose
“Keller,” she pleads, needing the relief only I can give her.
“Yes, baby?”
“I cried when your marks were gone, as if that meant I was no longer yours.”
“We can’t have that now, can we? If you doubt that, then so do others.” Shoving my fingers inside her, knowing she likes the slight pinch of pain from the intrusion, I fuck her with them, then attach myself to her shoulder. By the time I’m done with her, there won’t be an inch that doesn’t have my stamp on it. And I hope to God I can say the reverse about myself.
Hours later, her body draped over mine, she whispers, “I have a confession to make.”
“What is it, baby? You can tell me anything. I won’t feel any differently toward you.”
“I don’t need to know why, but I do know how much you hate Anthony Malone.”
Nodding, I state, “I do.” Realizing where this is going, feeling her fingers twisting where her hands are on my stomach, I add, “But I love his daughter.”
“You know?”
“I discovered it a couple days ago,” I admit, not quite ready to share how. Did you not learn your lesson about keeping secrets, Charles? “I can hate him and love you. My mom doesn’t blame me for what my father did, so how could I do that to you? Okay?” I reassure her.
“Okay,” she agrees, and as much as I hate it, I hear the slight hint of doubt, as if she fears she isn’t enough, that my hatred is more powerful.
Is she right? Do I value revenge and justice over her love?
Chapter Eleven
Keller
February 3rd…
It’s fucking hell forcing myself to act as if Emerson is a pain in the ass like the others, though some may go on to become decent cops. She, however, will be exactly what the department needs. If they don’t eat her alive first.
She’s forgiven me for the distance I’ve had to put between us while in this building, even if I’m tempted to kill any motherfucker that looks at her for longer than a millisecond. I’m a territorial man, and the mere idea that one or more of them are picturing her naked, that they might dare to ask her out? Makes me want to annihilate them all.
I do take pleasure in knowing when she is around them that they can see the slight bruising from when I grip her hard while I fuck her. The hickeys I can’t resist leaving on her neck like an adolescent boy. That my cum is seeping into her panties.
The last image makes me groan and contemplate a trip to the bathroom to rub one out, but I don’t. It only goes in her, otherwise, it’s wasted. We know we’re clean, both abstaining for years prior to getting together. After exchanging I love yous the night we made up, we agreed that we want to feel each other without the latex between us.
Emerson has been on the pill since high school, her doctor advising it due to the severity of her periods. The only change she did as she got older was move to the shots, preferring that to having to remember to take her dose every day. A fact she admitted she had trouble always remembering to do.
“You learn your lesson yet, asshole?” Potter asks, strolling in my room, smugness in his grin. Bask now, fuckface, your reign and that of your piece of shit uncle is nearing its end. Not deigning to answer, I flick him off, grinding my teeth when he laughs, saying, “I’ll take that as a no. Onward we’ll go then.” He turns, but before he reaches the door, he stops, calling out over his shoulder, “That student of yours, Emerson, is it? She’s quite a dish. I could just eat her up with a spoon.” Don’t react, if you do, the pain she and I have endured acting as if we mean nothing to each other would be for naught. He waits, and just as I’m about to lose the thin thread of control I have left, strides out, whistling.
Fuck! He can’t possibly suspect the ruse, can he? We’ve been so careful. We’ve even stopped going out to eat lest we’re seen together by the wrong people. Emerson believes it’s because a relationship between a student and instructor is frowned upon, and it is, but that’s not the only reason.
Mayor Jackass won’t hesitate to deal with anyone he views as an obstacle. If they know what she means to me, I doubt even being a Malone could save her.
Which means I have to, and there’s only one way I can think of to do so. And it just might cost me the most priceless treasure in the world. Her love.
Chapter Twelve
Emerson
February 10th…
Keller loves me, I know he does, but he’s been acting weird lately. Asking if I’m sure I want to be a cop. What I used to dream of being when I was younger. What changed my mind. Could I help others in a different way. They’re never overtly against me joining the department, but the insinuation is there. Oh, he couches it as concern for me, for my emotional, mental, and physical well-being, and at first, it was sweet and I viewed it as something a man would do to try and protect the woman he loves. Add in that he’s in law enforcement himself and has been for a long time, and his dad before that just means he’s seen what people can do to each other, the consequences of it, and he’s probably trying to save me from it taking a toll on me as it has him.
Keller is gruff, and I adore that about him because what you see is what you get. After all these years of instantly doubting those I interact with, it’s refreshing.
He shows me every day and night what I mean to him, that I’m it for him, yet I can’t shake the feeling that something is coming.
And whatever it is, it might destroy me.
Maybe I am just being paranoid, subconsciously feeling as if I don’t deserve happiness. What if I’m merely searching for a way to ruin it before it’s taken from me? I don’t know how, but I have a feeling it will be.
**Keller**
“Finally. I fucking found it,” I mutter to myself. It’s taken me a long ass time, but I’ve got it. The proof to get rid of Mayor Jackass and all who’ve funded not only his campaign, but essentially his evil ways.
I knew they were degenerates that deserved to burn in hell, but I had no idea the extent of how far it went. Bribing officials. Rigging elections. Ensuring those who did win had skeletons in their closet they’d do anything to keep quiet. Paying off the victims of their atrocities. Gaslighting those who dare to go against them until they lose all credibility. Selling drugs. Women. Guns.
It’s a fucking nightmare of epic proportions.
But what do I do with this information? Who can I trust to ensure justice is served?
I have no clue how deep their allies go. How high up they are.
Not to mention, I fear they’re on to me. I’ve noticed certain cars behind me numerous times and days, and while that isn’t unusual in a town this small, it’s the speed with which they take off when I get closer. As if they don’t want me to know who is in the vehicle. If it was just a coincidence or perhaps a friendly neighbor going to the same place, that’d be one thing, but to almost mow down someone in their haste to get away?
It’s making me even more worried about Emerson and what can happen to her when, not if, she graduates. She’s excelled in each course. Is a natural at things it takes others to figure out. She would truly be an asset if given a badge, but what would it cost her to get it? Would she be expected to give up her soul in order to survive?
Would her own father ask that of her?
From my limited dealings with the guy, he has no morals nor empathy. No concern for anyone but himself. And I highly doubt that’d change for something as sentimental as family as he obviously doesn’t care about his daughter.
I’ve been attempting, though not as subtly as I should, to see if Emerson is willing to try a different career. Saying that she’s still young and has plenty of time to follow this path if it’s truly for her, that this life changes you. And yes, that’s all true, but not any of the reasons behind my nudge in another direction. I feel like I’m betraying her by doing so, but I need her safe.
Yelling, needing to vent my rage at this situation, I know I’m stuck. It’s too late to quit now. They have to know I’m on to them, which means the only wa
y to stop it is to keep going. And by doing that, I clean up the force, making it better for Emerson. Making it the department she envisioned it being.
I just have to delay her joining until I’m able to do that.
Chapter Thirteen
Emerson
February 15th…
“I hate being here,” I tell Edison. “How can none of these people see how fake it all is?”
“Hard to recognize what you are in others,” he says wisely.
“That’s a scary thought,” I admit. “Especially as I feel fake for just being here.”
“Not as if we had much of a choice.”
“There’s always one,” he whispers as dad approaches.
“Edison,” he greets his only son, no emotion involved. He treats strangers better than he does his own family because he wants their vote. Doesn’t he know we get to cast one, too? “Emerson, follow me.” No asking, just the expectation that I will. Loathe to cause a scene, and unsure why that is, I trail after him.
Once we’re in his office, he sits, not waiting for me to do so first nor even offering me a chair. He gives me a cursory glance, and lest I dare to look for any fatherly concern in it, he informs me, “Rupert is pleased you were able to come.” His tone is that of someone complimenting a company on their merchandise. Sick fuck.
Done with this charade, with being viewed as nothing more than a possession to be passed to the highest bidder or the man that can make it worth his while in other ways, I stand. My anger ignites, the temperature of the room seeming to rise along with it, and for a second I picture myself as the phoenix Keller calls me. Shoving the sleeves of my cardigan up, forgetting the rigorous lovemaking last night and the visible effects of it, I let him know, “I. Am. Not. Marrying. Him. Nor any man you or mother choose.” His eyes land on my arms and a grin that can only be termed evil appears.
“You’d prefer Keller Charles,” he throws out there, enjoying my gasp of surprise.
“How did…?”
“Knowledge is power, my dear,” he uses the endearment mockingly, “and the vast amount at my hands will help maintain my place until I’m ready to move for the next step.” Politically. He’s never been shy about sharing his aspirations to reach a higher position.
“And what do you think you know?”
“That you fancy yourself in love with a fucking Dudley Do-Right. If he’d just done as the rest and looked the other way, he’d still be out on the streets, but he has a conscience,” he spits the last word like it’s dirty. To him, it is. What is he talking about? The rest? Looking the other way? “We’d thought to use you to bring him to heel, but I convinced them my idea is better. Rupert can do a lot more for us than Charles can.” Then he steeples his fingers and literally looks down his nose at me. “And all I had to do was offer him you in exchange.”
“You can’t make me do what you want. I’m done kowtowing to your demands.”
His gaze skims me, then he taunts, “Yet it seems as if you like being forced.” How dare he taint what Keller did with love. What I begged him to do. We show our affection in numerous ways and I refuse to be ashamed of that. It’s only wrong if one of us didn’t want it. “Keller would never hurt me.”
Dad waves his hand, dismissing me. “As if I care.” Wow. I mean, I knew he didn’t, but actually getting confirmation? That’s harsh. “You will do this.”
“If I don’t?”
“What’s more important? Defying me or saving him?”
Not wanting to ask but needing to, I push the question through lips gone tight with frustration. “What are you implying?”
“Do you know the target cops have on their backs when they’re behind bars? I mean, the odds of one surviving… An inmate already facing life wouldn’t hesitate to add another crime to his already extensive list if given the right incentive.”
“That isn’t an issue as Keller hasn’t done anything nor will he to put him there.”
He tsks at me, fucking tsks like he’s disappointed. “Daughter, have you learned nothing? Do you know how many people are incarcerated simply because someone else has deemed them to be a nuisance that must be dealt with? How many are never seen or heard from again to ensure a path is cleared?”
“You can’t possibly be threatening to send an innocent man to prison just so you can get your way? Are you that fucking selfish?” Despite not actually loving my parents as I should, I still respected their role in my life. However, I now realize how stupid I’ve been. I am nothing to them. Never have been. Never will be. Wait, I take that back. I’m a bargaining chip. That’s it.
“You underestimate how much I like winning. I don’t care who has to lose to make that happen.” Rushing from the room, his laughter following me, I blow past all the guests, uncaring of the stares I’m drawing, ignoring Edison’s attempt to stop me. But I draw up short when Mom blocks my escape.
“Don’t be such a ninny,” she scolds me. “This is for the best.”
“Are you really going to try that excuse with me? It’s what’s best for you and dad. Neither of you give a shit about what I want, do you?”
She seems appalled, but not for the reason you’d imagine. “Why would we?”
Moving around her, I hurry to my car, chanting, “I need Keller,” over and over, knowing he’ll help me figure this out. He won’t let my dad do this to me, to us. He’ll save me. I don’t know how yet, but I trust him to nonetheless. As I near our house, he’s insisted I refer to it as ours, not his, I notice his dad’s car in the driveway. I’ve met his parents a couple times and adore them both. Wiping my cheeks, I force myself to take a few calming breaths, to hide this until after Dexter leaves. Keller and I can talk then.
Entering, I don’t see them anywhere, but the further I go, their voices reach me. We’re having an unseasonably warm day and it appears they’re taking advantage of it by sitting on the deck. A cup of coffee and a carafe sits on the table between them, the warmth more than enough to ward off the slight chill in the air. But with a high of fifty today, there isn’t much of one.
I walk by an open window, knowing Keller probably did so to get some fresh air circulating in the place as it’s been locked up tight for months due to winter. As I continue, I’m stopped when I catch a bit of what’s being said.
“There’s a reason why there aren’t many female cops,” Keller says. What now?
“And that’s why you’re against Emerson joining the force,” Dexter responds. It’s a statement of fact, not a query.
Keller nods, but I can’t see his face as his back is toward me. “This is what she wants.”
“Then what are you going to do about it?” I strain, rising on my tiptoes, wanting to hear his response, but a loud truck goes by and I miss the majority of it, bits floating to me instead. It’s enough to have my heart freeze in my chest, becoming so brittle it breaks into pieces so tiny I doubt it’ll ever heal. My brain frantically works to find an alternative to what he said, but it’s to no avail. I wish their voices were clearer.
“She’s never had to sacrifice a day in her life.”
Retracing my steps, I head to our, his, bedroom and hastily pack a bag. A lot of my stuff is here now, but I take only the necessities. It’s not as if I need to be or could be comfortable after learning how not only my parents but my soulmate thinks about me. I can accept the discovery regarding them, having seen signs of their true feelings, or lack of them, for years, but Keller? I’m blindsided. Then I remember how he’s been acting lately, trying to dissuade me from being a cop even though he knows what it means to me. But it’s apparent that he doesn’t care what I want either. I’ve never felt so alone.
Sure, I can run to Edison, but if dad and mom are so quick to use me, to threaten Keller, what’s to say they won’t do so with my brother to get me to do what they want? My eyes scan the bed, memories of giving myself to him amidst those very sheets swamp me, and my reserve falters for a second. I want to deny what I heard, assure myself I’m wrong, but I can’t.
I carefully make my way to the door, taking one last glance at the only place that ever felt like home.
“Good-bye, Keller. You may not be able to see me as anything more than the spoiled princess of a man you obviously can’t stand,” and for good reason I think to myself, “but I saw you. I wish you could say the same about me.”
Then I close the door behind me, literally and metaphorically.
**Keller**
“Where’s Emerson?” Dad asks when I let him in.
I growl, making my displeasure known. “She had to go to her parents’. I offered to go, too, but she knows how I feel about him and said she wouldn’t put me through that.”
“She knows how, but does she know why?”
“No,” I sigh, knowing how he’ll react to that.
“Son…”
I cut him off, “I was going to confess everything tonight.”
“You’re worried about her reaction.”
“Among other things.”
“Potter.” I nod. “He’ll make her life hell if she graduates and puts on the uniform.”
“Not if, when. She’s an excellent student. The department needs her. But there’s a reason why there aren’t many female cops.”
“And that’s why you’re against Emerson joining the force,” Dad theorizes.
“This is what she wants.”