by JA Hensley
18
I really hate mornings, but I especially loathe them when I don’t sleep well. My shift starts in twenty minutes, and I still haven’t had my caffeine. Thankfully I can see the Freedom of Espresso sign up ahead. The drive-thru is clear, so I pull up to order my usual.
When I get to the window, Amber hands me my marble macchiato. “You sure you don’t need a triple shot? You look wiped out,” she says with a smile.
“Thanks, but I need to be able to concentrate at work, not climb the walls.” I hand over my money and take off before she can comment any further on my appearance.
The hospital parking lot is worse than Walmart at Christmas. I have to drive around for ten minutes before I find a spot. Of course this means I have to run to the ER to avoid being late. The last time I clocked in after seven, the charge nurse chewed my ass and gave me the worst patients all day.
I scan my badge at 6:59 a.m. and go to the breakroom to stash my purse.
“You know you should do that before you clock in,” Geneva says with a smile. I nod and hurry out to the floor before she yells at me. She’s a drill sergeant, but I love working with her because she always keeps the ER running smoothly. It’s not an easy thing to do, and I admire her ability.
“Look what the cat dragged in,” I hear Jonathan say as I approach the nurses’ station.
“Thanks for that. Did a memo go out to everyone telling them to make sure I know I look like shit today?”
“No memo needed, babe. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. Between the jet lag and the frantic pace of the weekend, I’m beat. It’ll take a couple days to recover.”
“Oh, really? The weekend was frantic? Who were you with?”
“Remember, I went to Las Vegas for Becca and Colin’s wedding?”
“Yes, now I remember. You were looking forward to sampling what Vegas had to offer. So, tell me all about it.”
As I open my mouth to tell him it’s none of his business, the radio starts squawking. Bill handles the call, and we all jump up to prepare for the emergency that’s coming in.
After we’ve stabilized the patient, Jonathan and I start working on charting.
“So, are you going to tell me about your weekend, or should we just leave it up to my imagination?”
“You know how it is; it stays in Vegas and all.”
“Christin Josephine, don’t you hold out on me. Your sex life is the only thing hotter than my own, and Oscar has been holding out on me. So spill.”
I take a deep breath and try to come up with a story that will satisfy him.
“First of all, you know for a fact that my middle name is Jo, so stop making me sound like an old lady. Second, I’m not sure where to start.”
“Honey, you start by telling me what he looked like and how well he fucked you. That’s really all I want to know,” Jonathan says with a wink.
“He’s hot,” even though I hate to admit that. “He’s tall, confident, and strong enough to carry me around.”
“And you know this how?” he interrupts.
“You may never know. Now shut up and let me tell you my story.”
Jonathan holds his hands up in surrender. “Please continue.”
“Anyway, as I was saying, he’s strong. He’s got a few tattoos, but the best part you won’t believe.”
“Really?”
“Uh-huh.” I go back to my paperwork and write down the patient’s vitals.
“Seriously, bitch? You’re just going to stop? You know how much I hate it when you do that. Tell me already,” his voice gets louder with each word.
“Keep it down and I’ll tell you. Besides, you know you’re too easy to tease.” I look around before I whisper, “he’s pierced.”
“Shut up! What kind?”
“Let’s just say that it feels apa-mazing,” I say as I burst out laughing. Geneva looks over and gives us a stern look, and I go back to charting.
“This conversation isn’t over. You’re coming home with me tonight, we’ll open a bottle of wine, and you’re going to tell me every single detail about mister tall, hot, and pierced.” I know it’s futile to argue, so I nod in agreement and continue with my work.
The shift is busy, which makes time go by fast. When our replacements come on Jonathan pulls me to the break room.
“I’ll meet you at my place in an hour. Go home, take a shower, and come over. I want to hear all about your trip without being interrupted,” he says excitedly.
“Believe me, I’ll be there. I couldn’t stand to watch you pout around here all day tomorrow if I don’t.”
“See you soon, sweetie,” he says as he kisses my cheek and walks out.
As I step out into the hall Geneva stops me. “Do you have a minute, CJ?”
“Sure, is everything okay?”
“I hope so. A man came by over the weekend asking for you. I think he was a patient here a couple weeks ago. He gave me a note to give to you. I didn’t read it, but I got a bad vibe from him.”
“Okay, well, it wouldn’t be the first time someone came back after they’d been treated here. Do you still have the note?”
She reaches in her pocket and pulls out a blue envelope. “I’ve been carrying it around all shift trying to decide what to do.”
“It’s okay, really. I can handle it.”
“Let me know if you need anything. I don’t trust him, but there’s no reason to ban him from the hospital at this point. Just be careful,” she says as she hands me the note and walks away. It’s not like Geneva to be freaked out about anything, and that makes me a little nervous. I tear open the envelope and pull out a note.
Nurse CJ,
I can’t stop thinking about you and how nice you were to me. Thank you for the excellent care you provided. I hope we can meet under different circumstances in the near future.
Forever yours,
Curt
I’ve read the note several times but still cannot figure out who this person is. I see so many patients during a shift that there’s no way to remember everyone’s name. I usually can recall their injuries, but that’s about it. I fold the note and put it in my pocket as I leave the ER. I’ll worry about it tomorrow when I can try and pull up a chart.
The walk to my car is long. I forgot that I had to park in the back lot this morning. I keep hearing footsteps behind me, but when I turn around there’s nobody there.
“Great, now I’m paranoid,” I mutter to myself as I finally reach my Prius. Make fun of me all you want, it gets great gas mileage. I start to pull out of the spot and I see someone's midsection in my backup camera. When I look closer to see what it is, there’s a man standing behind my car. He walks to the driver’s side window, but I’m hesitant to open it.
“CJ, are you okay?” He bends down and I see that it’s Kise, our security guard. I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding and open my window.
“Hey, Kise, I’m fine. Sorry, I was lost in thought.”
“No problem. Have a good night,” he says as he pats the roof of my car. I shake off my panic and drive home as fast as the law allows.
19
We’re taking the same charter plane back that we came on, minus three passengers. Colin and Becca have decided to stay a couple more days to enjoy their honeymoon. Since there’re just four of us, we’re all spread out in the cabin. It took five minutes for Kevin to pass out on the couch in the back. James, Stephanie, and I are in the front in our own leather recliners. This really is the only way to fly.
Once we’re at cruising altitude and the seat belt sign is off, I get up and sit next to Stephanie.
“I need some help, if you don’t mind.”
“Help with what?”
“Christin.”
She looks at me with a shocked expression and then breaks into a smile. “We’ve all been wondering what happened after you were shot. I guess the rumors have some truth to them.”
“What do you mean? What rumors?”
“Oh, y
ou know the kind of things that friends talk about when they can tell something’s going on but nothing can be confirmed. She was a raging bitch after you took off, so we figured that you hooked up and then left her in the middle of the night.”
“That’s not what happened at all. She was the one who left me.” Thinking back to that night gets my blood pumping with desire and anger all at once.
“I’m not surprised by that. Christin is a tough cookie to crack, especially when it comes to men.”
“I’m hoping to figure her out. Do you have any advice for me? I really want her to let me in.”
Stephanie sits up straight and puts her finger in my chest. “Let’s get one thing straight. If you hurt her, you’ll have to answer to me. I won’t hurt you physically because, well, you’re huge. But I can take you on in the digital world and you really don’t want to fuck with me, Jude Schaefer. Are we clear?”
Damn, this little woman is scary as fuck. I hear a chuckle behind me and turn to see Runt enjoying this moment.
“She’s serious, dude. Don’t piss her off.”
“Okay, I get it,” I say holding my hands up in surrender. “It’s hard for me to admit, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking aboutChristin since we met. She’s got me by the balls, and she doesn’t even care.”
“Oh, she cares. That’s why she’s running,” Stephanie says on a sigh.
“What does that even mean? I’m so confused.”
“Here’s what I’ll tell you. Christin had a really rough time growing up. Her mother is a whore. Literally. She paraded men in and out of the house all the time. Christin had to take care of her little brother and keep the house clean. She learned from an early age that men only want one thing, and they don’t stick around.”
“Damn. I figured it was something else, but that makes sense. So, what do I do?”
“That’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it? I have no idea. I know it’s not the answer you’re looking for, but I’ve never seen her in a relationship. Ever. Her list of one night stands and hookups would rival anyone. My suggestion—stick around. Show her that you’re not going anywhere. And don’t have sex with her.”
I look away and think about this. Can I not have sex with Christin? She’s like a siren, calling me to my pleasure-filled death. It will be a huge struggle to keep my hands to myself.
“You fucked her didn’t you?” Stephanie asks interrupting my thoughts. I nod, but don’t look her in the eye. “You’ve got your work cut out for you then. I don’t envy you one bit.”
That makes me look up at her. “What are you saying? Is this doomed before it even starts?”
“I wouldn’t say doomed, but it’s going to be tough. You’ve slept with her twice now that I know of, and both times one of you left. The fact that she gave you a second chance is something, but I’m not sure.”
“We were really drunk. I don’t remember going to her room last night. I got the feeling that she was as surprised as I was.”
“For the love of all that’s holy, what are you thinking?” Runt pipes up again. “You two are ridiculous. It’s obvious that there’s a mutual attraction. You need to man up and tell her. These games are nothing but a distraction. Seriously, grow a pair and tell her how you feel.”
“He’s right, you know,” Stephanie shrugs.
“Fuck me,” I sigh as I punch the armrest. “This is going to suck, isn’t it?” Both James and Steph nod sympathetically.
The rest of the flight is quiet. Everyone else is sleeping, but my thoughts are racing and rest doesn’t find me. I’ve got to figure out a way to prove to Christin that I’m sincere, and I want her in my life. Of course, that sounds really pathetic and I’d never admit it out loud, but that’s where my head is. When did I turn into a lovesick teenager?
The ride back to my new apartment from the airport is short. Thankfully traffic is somewhat heavy so I have to concentrate on driving, giving me a reprieve from thinking about Christin. Once I park and walk into my home, I’m hit with all sorts of memories. Maybe it wasn’t the smartest move to rent Colin’s old place since this is where I had my first encounter with the woman who haunts my dreams.
I throw my bag down in the bedroom and go find a beer. My body thinks it’s nine even though the clock says midnight. As I sit down to watch SportsCenter my phone pings with a message.
Transport tomorrow. Be here at 8 am for instructions. East wing.
Finally, I have something to do. I’m looking forward to this new career and the routine of going to work every day.
I wonder if I’ll ever get tired of driving into Belator’s complex. The buildings are impressive and the landscaping gives it an old-world feel, like someone traded a modern building for a castle. I’m meeting my supervisor in his office, which is away from the main building. It’s about a half-mile drive around the complex, but everything is well-marked and easy to find.
I’m greeted by a young man who looks like he just got out of the Army. Like me, he’s wearing the standard Belator uniform, has a buzz cut, and enough wisdom in his young eyes that I’m certain he saw combat.
“Good morning, Mr. Schaefer, Mr. Keller is waiting for you.” He gets up from his desk and knocks on the door behind him. After waiting a second, he opens the door and gestures for me to enter. I thank him and walk into a large office. There are plaques and awards on all the walls, a huge desk in the middle, and a man who reminds me of my father more than I care to admit standing behind it.
“Mr. Schafer, I presume?” I nod sharply and feel my Marine training coming back in full force. This man screams former Special Forces, and I can’t help but straighten my spine and come to attention.
“Come in and have a seat, Jude. We need to discuss your first assignment.” I move to the chair in front of the desk and lower myself into it quickly.
“As you can imagine, we are pretty formal here. We take our jobs very seriously and protocol is of utmost importance. We’ve put procedures in place to keep our employees safe, and we expect them to be followed to the letter. I understand that has been somewhat of a problem for you in the past. Do I need to worry about that now?”
“I appreciate your candor, sir. I don’t believe that it will be a problem. My last employer had a habit of changing procedure and expectations at the last minute or failing to communicate the changes, which caused problems. I believe that since everything here is clear from the beginning, I’ll be able to comply without fail.”
“That’s what I need to hear. We’ve got a couple of high-profile transports coming up in the next few weeks that I’d like you to be part of. You’ll be shadowing some of our best employees, so you should have an idea of how things work. For now, I’m going to assign you to local transports as a trial run. This will allow you to work independently and for us to evaluate your performance before throwing you in the deep end.”
“Yes, sir. I’m ready to get to work.” This place runs a lot like my unit in Iraq. That gives me a sense of security I didn’t know I was missing.
“All right, Benjamin will give you the file on your way out. Your vehicle has been assigned, and you will be the only one using it. However, as you know, it’s not a take-home car, so you need to return it when you go off shift. Your first case is transporting a state prisoner to court and back to prison. Call me if you have any questions.” Mr. Keller stands, and I get up and leave as quickly as possible. I get the feeling he doesn’t like having his time wasted.
I’m handed a file and a set of keys as I leave the office. “The motor pool and equipment storage are in the building next door. The tag on the keys will tell you which bay you’re parked in. There should be gas in the car. Stop by the office there and get your weapon, cuffs, and shackles. I’ve called ahead and the prisoner should be ready when you get there. Court is at two so you need to get moving,” Benjamin says before sitting back down behind his desk. I take what I’ve been given and follow his directions to the motor pool.
The drive to Taylorsville C
orrectional Institution takes about an hour. After I pass through the three checkpoints, I’m directed to the sally port. I drive in and the door closes behind me; I’m in the secure part of the prison. It’s a fairly straight forward process of exchanging paperwork before the prisoner is shackled and strapped into the backseat. In less than fifteen minutes we’re back on the road. Neither of us speaks the entire drive. I’m really not interested in what he has to say, and I’m sure he doesn’t want to hear my thoughts.
As I pull up to the courthouse, there are people standing on the sidewalk protesting. I don’t remember reading anything in the file about this guy’s case that would cause this kind of turn out.
“What are they yelling about?” he asks.
“No clue,” I answer as I drive into the underground sally port. This area is much smaller than at the prison, and there’s only room for two cars at a time. I move my charge to the holding cell and secure him there while I park the car. This is not the most ideal situation, and I make a mental note to discuss it with Mr. Keller before doing it again. I get back to the cell within ten minutes, and thankfully, everything is fine. We go up the secure elevator to the courtroom to await his hearing. As we sit in the hall, I realize that I’m really going to like this job.
20
Here I am, doing the walk of shame again. When am I going to learn that this is not the way to live my life?
It’s still early when I pull into my garage, the sun just starting to peek out over the horizon. I don’t have to work until noon today, so I think I will grab a couple hours of pillow time in my own bed. Alone. Just the way I like it. Nobody wanting more, taunting me with hot sex that I can’t get enough of, or looking so fucking delicious I have to lick his abs.