West of the Quator

by Cheryl Bartlam DuBois

  “You mean meditate?” asked Rob confused at Grandpa’s new-age approach to life.

  “Meditate, shmeditate, I not be carin’ what those swamis want to call it, there’s no need to be puttin’ a label on it. That be the whole point. It be about nothin’… not somethin’. The minute you be puttin’ a name on it becomes somethin’.”

  Rob sat there thinking back on his life ‘B.C.’ – ‘Before the Caribbean’ –remembering how much he’d wished he could loose himself in that void of nothingness. But, because he never seemed to be able to find a moment alone he’d always been unable to find it. Here he was now with as much space and time on his hands as he could have ever dreamed possible and he was afraid of it – as if he might discover something about himself that he didn’t want to know. As if ignorance was bliss and if he actually understood too much he might have to take more responsibility for his life. After all, one does tend to learn the most at the lowest point in one’s life.

  “You know, the life you be living right now is exactly what you created,” said Grandpa picking up on his thoughts.

  “The trick to life is to be careful what you wish for, because it usually come to be. The problem is, we don’t always think through all the details too well. I mean, you likely wished you had more free time on your hands, but you forgot to ask for it from some other means than getting shot in the foot.” Grandpa paused studying Rob, who seemed quite puzzled by this recent revelation.

  “You should be lookin’ at the bigger picture of life. I mean you be havin’ all those things that you thought you wanted. You be livin’ in a beautiful tropical part of the world, you own a luxurious yacht, you have a beautiful girlfriend who loves you, and except for a small hole in the bottom of your foot and a hole or two in your boat, what more could you possibly be needin’?”

  Rob thought about what Grandpa had said for a moment and then nodded his head realizing what a lucky man he truly was, holes or no holes. After all, it could have been worse. He could be dead right now instead of looking at that beautiful ocean.

  “Problem is,” said Grandpa, “When you dream’n bout the things you be wantin’ outta life, you sometimes forget to fill in all the details in between. And those details don’t always turn out the way you pictured,” chuckled Grandpa. “In fact they be the things that make you appreciate the good parts and teach the hardest earned lesson.”

  “Well, then I must have learned an awful lot over the last few months. Funny, I don’t feel a lot smarter,” said Rob somewhat sarcastically since his sense of humor was fading rapidly along with his sanity.

  What Rob didn’t realize was that Alex had taken Grandpa aside, due to his waning state of mind, hoping that Grandpa would have the answers to snap Rob out of his current tropical depression, which was developing faster than any storm that had ever moved through this part of the Caribbean. Both Grandpa and Alex realized that Rob was at present, taking life a little too seriously.

  “You got to ease up on yourself Rob,” Grandpa continued hoping his ongoing tutelage would eventually get trough. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. Making money or not, it be time you learn to be good to yourself and allow yourself a time to rest. You need to take the time to be findin’ your spiritual anchor. You be havin’ plenty of time to get out there and make money again. Just be grateful for the gifts the Universe has sent you… and learn to laugh more.”

  “Seems to me, the kind of gifts I’ve been receiving recently, I could live without. I mean in the last two months I’ve been given the gifts of ten days of incarceration, being robbed by my ex-girlfriend’s father of my home, I have holes in my million dollar boat, a miserable disease from a mosquito, I’ve been kidnapped, and then shot by the police… all for a boat I can’t even sail. Besides that and the fact that I’m nearly broke again with no hope of work for the next three months, everything’s just great,” lamented Rob wallowing in self pity.

  “Like the ‘Twelve Days of Christmas,’ I’m just waiting for the remaining half dozen gifts from the Universe.”

  “In fact,” thought Rob to himself. “Miguel might just send another couple of his goons or even come back himself to collect from my hide, or even sail off with the boat once it’s back in the water.” But, these were thoughts that Rob was keeping to himself. Since of course, Grandpa knew nothing of Joey’s apparent illicit endeavors.

  “I know it be hard to see, standin’ in the middle of it, but look what you be gainin’ in return,” pointed out Grandpa. “You be that much wiser than you were before you began… and you found the love of your life.”

  Rob nodded, considering this fact and smiled at the thought of Alex. But underneath it all, he still looked miserable with himself. Grandpa could see the fear in Rob’s eyes and he knew fear was the one thing that could ruin a man, or turn to ruin any great plan. He realized he somehow had to help Rob gain his confidence back – in himself and in the Universe.

  Deep down Rob felt he’d failed the test of this new life of his. Compared to his previous ease of success in his old life, his new life was a shambles. He was scared – scared of what lay ahead and how he was going to survive this new life in Paradise.

  “You know it be all about attitude,” insisted Grandpa. “With the world changing all the time it really be the only thing we can control. You can be vexed by something that happens and feel like the world be out to get you, or you can choose to not let it bother you. You choose to be happy or to be unhappy, it be totally up to you. Since, it be all about how we feel about something. In fact, the way we feel about things controls all that cum to us… good and bad. To truly find happiness you have to choose to be happy, not sit around and wait until it be happening to you and be vex at the world in the meantime.”

  “Well it’s kind of hard to be happy about getting shot. I mean I can’t really say I’m happy I got shot in the foot,” said Rob stoically.

  Grandpa couldn’t help but chuckle at Rob’s literal interpretation of his philosophy on life. Although Grandpa understood the principal now, he hadn’t always appreciated the things for which one should be grateful – like simply waking up every morning in a sound and working body. In fact, when Grandpa, or Stanley, was Rob’s age, he had felt nearly as ungrateful as Rob did about the gifts in his life and the trivial trials he was faced with day after day. That was until he woke up one morning with viral encephalitis after one of his trips down-island to Trinidad. And, as the doctors had prognosticated, he thought he would surely die before the sun had set that day. Although he lived through that day and the next, his condition fluctuated for the days to come between seizures and unconsciousness. When he was conscious, he hardly knew his own family as he ranted and raved night after night. Even though the doctors had given her little hope to cling to, poor Winifred knelt by his bed day and night praying to his Guardian Angels for his recovery. It seemed her prayers were heard, for amazingly, on the fifth day of his torment, his dementia cleared and his senses returned to him – even if his body hadn’t since he had been left paralyzed from the waist down. Life wasn’t worth living, thought Stanley feeling sorry for himself, if he could no longer make love or dance – the two things he loved most in life. And what good was he anyway – he could no longer even support his family and was just one more mouth to feed.

  In fact, at that point Stanley had been ready to give up living, forgetting all the wonderful gifts he possessed and the people who truly loved him. If ever the Universe had confronted him with a test to see how much he’d learned in his life this had been the one, since it took a full year for Stanley to recover from his paralysis. And, it wasn’t until he realized that his life was truly in his own hands, that he stood up and walked again, to the doctor’s amazement. Within a month, Stanley had totally recovered and he was so much his old self again that his extended illness was nearly forgotten. But deep inside Stanley knew that he would never truly be his old self again – he had changed forever. He was a man changed by the lesson he’d learned about life and his newly earned
credentials for living, which had so painfully been accredited him.

  Grandpa knew that he could share his miracle with Rob, and tell him how he had not appreciated his life until it had been nearly taken from him or worse – left him unable to live it. But, he also knew that this was a lesson that no teacher other than life itself could bestow upon another. So instead, Grandpa presented it to him as simply as he knew how – “Do you think the fish in the sea feel sorry for themselves when they get caught on your hook or eaten by a bigger fish? They just accept it as part of life. Like they say, shit happens, so get on with it.”

  Hearing Grandpa coin that famous phrase found on American bumper stickers, Rob couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle. After all, life wasn’t truly so bad. Although, he was still feeling like the one that didn’t get away.

  Time passed, and so did the tropical depression that had been hanging over their little boat yard. Once Rob finally began listening to Grandpa’s advise and acquiring a new appreciation for life, the days started to fly by. Before he knew it, Alex and Luis were wrapping up repairs and putting the finishing touches on the Island Fever’s paint job – including applying a fresh coat of bottom paint8* to her hulls.

  It was fast approaching the end of August – the heart of hurricane season. And, Alex knew she had to get the boat into the safety of the lagoon, but first she had to get Rob to Puerto Rico to have the doctor find out how his foot was progressing. To the doctor’s surprise, Rob’s foot had healed completely and was ready for the cast to come off. There was something to be said for his recent change in attitude, Rob thought. Of course, it was still going to be a while before Rob was doing the Rumba or windsurfing, but at least he would be able to shed that awful plaster prison his leg had been in for the last six weeks.

  The weather forecast was predicting no storms in the immediate future, so to celebrate, Rob decided to take Alex to ‘The Baths,’ a natural mineral spa and retreat on Virgin Gorda, in the British Virgin Islands. Rob knew Alex needed a few days of R&R – something she’d certainly earned. She had after all, put their world back together again and the Island Fever was about to be launched for a second true in her short existence

  Rob’s life was on an upward swing once again and he was beginning to see all sorts of wonderful possibilities that awaited them. Maybe they should head off with the boat to some new part of the world where no one knew its history – once they had a little cash to fall back on. The South Pacific sounded attractive – uncharted territory just waiting to be discovered. To Rob, it seemed the possibilities were simply endless.

  1*TROPICAL DEPRESSION – The second stage in the development of a hurricane with winds up to thirty-three knots – the first being a tropical wave. Of course, the term ‘tropical depression’ also stands for the first stage in the development of the disease known as Island Fever. But with regard to the weather, a tropical depression goes on to develop into a tropical storm before potentially becoming a hurricane once it reaches sixty-four knots (75mph) or above.

  2**HURRICANE SEASON – That time of the year from June through November when hurricanes 3*** can develop in the Atlantic Ocean and head for the Caribbean, Mexico, the Bahamas, Bermuda, or the southeastern United States. The true risk of hurricanes doesn’t usually start until late summer, and at least by the book, should end by November 15th when the Tradewinds start to blow steadily from the southeast at an average 16 mph, thus cooling the ocean’s water temperature.

  3***HURRICANES – A tropical creature that develops off the coast of Africa due to winds from different directions converging over the summer’s warm ocean waters (over 81 degrees). These perfect conditions added to the earth’s rotation make thunderstorms circulate counterclockwise forming a churning mass known as a tropical cyclone. Once the winds from this cyclone reach 75mph it is classified as a hurricane.

  4****CATEGORY ONE HURRICANE – A hurricane’s severity being categorized on a scale of one to five with category one starting with 75mph and a five being the equivalent of a lO. O earthquake.

  5*STURM AND DRANG – A German literary movement of the 1770’s which embraced impulse, instincts, and emotion – all the things that got Rob into this mess in the first place. It implies personal crisis and disorder of the material world.

  6**DOLDRUMS – The area of ocean which lays calm close to the equator and near 30 degrees latitude – known as the ‘Horse Latitudes. 7*** The doldrums can also describe that period between storms during hurricane season where the wind and one’s mental state start to feel stagnant.

  7***HORSE LATITUDES – The area of ocean in the Atlantic near the Bermuda Triangle which was named that because the Spanish galleons made a habit of being becalmed there and disposing of any and all unnecessary weight in order to get moving again – including many of the horses that were bound for the Americas.

  8*BOTTOM PAINT or ANTl-FOULING PAINT – A special paint for the bottom of a boat below the waterline formulated to limit marine growth such as barnacles and green slime from attaching itself to your vessel The paint is designed to sluff off in fine layers once the boat reaches a certain speed. Unfortunately, this does not entirely rid the hull of unwanted passengers and a good monthly scrubbing with a mask and snorkel are required to keep the boat clean and running at its optimum speed through the water Although they are non-environmentally acceptable, many bottom paints contain high quantities of copper and arsenicto assist in discouraging those little organisms from climbing aboard in the first place.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Changes in Latitude

  “If we couldn’t laugh we would all go insane.”

  Jimmy Buffet

  Upon returning to the island after their long needed rest’ Alex busied herself with preparations for getting the Island Fever back into the water where she belonged, leaving the island buzzing with excitement of the prospect of a launching party. You see, there is nothing quite like the launching of a boat and a lot of Carib beer to bring an island together. Of course, Alex could arrange to have one of the island salvage boats tie a rope to the Island Fever and drag her back down the beach into the water, but why pass up such a great excuse for a party?

  The technique was quite simple, especially since the steel pipes used to roll her out of the water were still in place. First: Purchase copious amounts of beer and rum and hire one steel drum band; Second: Gather several hundred islanders for one hell of a party; Third: Put the muscle bound men on the back end to lift the sterns of the hulls as she starts to slide back into the water and just have the rest of the able bodied beer drinkers push like hell. Eventually, the boat will find its way into enough water to get her floating again. At that point she could be towed around the sandbar to deep water where her rudders and dagger boards could be re-installed. What was important to remember, was to be certain to commence with launching procedures before one unlocked the serious stash of libations in order to keep the incentive for hard work under de hot sun, higher than the receding tide.

  Rob, who was grateful that the boat was finally finished and that he no longer had any gapping holes in his sole or his topsides, had splurged and sprung for five cases of the locally bottled Pott Rum. Little did he ever expect to host a Pott and Coke party but even his friends at immigration partook in his hospitality and leant a hand with the launching. Of course, they had an ulterior motive in mind – to get the Island Fever off the island as quick as possible. As remuneration for their earlier faux pas they had even been kind enough to supply the steel drum band to liven up the afternoon’s festivities.

  Christian did the honor of re-christening the boat with a cheap bottle of champagne poured over her hibiscus lei covered bows, as two hundred happy islanders carried her into the water. It was a magical day for all concerned and Rob was actually beginning to believe that maybe the scourge had lifted as he and Alex climbed aboard his, once again, floating vessel.

  Even Alex took the rest of the day off to join in the celebration, once the Island Fever was safely on ancho
r in Simpson Bay. She danced the night away with Luis and the guys. Rob watched her smile, laugh, and enjoy herself. He didn’t even mind that he was unable to dance with her to the steel drum band, since inside, he was already dancing to the beat of Alex’s drum. And I, well I was never one to miss a good party. In fact, in my day I had been a rather good dancer, so I took the opportunity to join in the festivities. After all, we need a break here on ‘The Other Side’ too.

  It had finally dawned on Rob that he had indeed gotten the hang of living in three-quarter time for the first time in his three decades of life on the planet. He had begun to realize that the only thing that truly counted was how one perceived life, and it was finally starting to sink in that the present was the only stuff to build his life on – everything else was just a cerebral exercise. After all, you can grow old and loose your memories of the past, and even give up on your dreams of the future, but it is truly impossible to loose the present and still survive, is it not?

  It only took Alex and Luis a few days to put the final touches on preparing the ship for seaworthiness. The new engine sled was ready, but the engine had strangely been delayed in shipping and had not yet arrived. No matter, they were going nowhere immediately since they still had more than two months to weather out the rest of hurricane season, and there was no reason to leave since they were sitting just outside the safest hurricane hole in the Eastern Caribbean – Simpson Bay Lagoon.

  Even though they were ecstatic to be afloat once again, Rob and Alex already missed Grandma and Grandpa, not to mention Old Henry and Lambchop. It was just as well that Rob was not yet able to take him windsurfing, since Lambchop was much too large now to fit on the board. Lambchop’ s horns were developing rapidly and created a bit of a hazzard when he jumped up with his hooves on Rob’s chest to nuzzle his chin. Lambchop’s adolescent hormones were also rapidly abounding and he was becoming a very horny goat in more ways than one.